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Article of the Now

Jasmine Richardson

Jasmine Richardson was a 12-year-old girl who, with the help of her bf, on April 23, 2006, knifed her family in the name of the Worldwide Furry Conspiracy. At 12, she is the youngest killer in Soviet Canuckistan and was a regular user of the super cereal emo-gangbang known as Vampirefreaks. Besides being a Goff and getting stuck in the hole for a decade, she is also the hottest piece of JB to commit murder EVAR. Apparently, she killed her family for the lulz and to get with her boyfriend, Jeremy Steinke, who was 23. Rumors indicate that Sean O'Neill has already prepared for Jasmine a $9000 a month contract with Suicide Girls to be their head pinup, right beside Nazi superwoman RAPE BLOSSOM. She has declined to comment upon whether or not she will take Pimpmaster Sean up on this offer.

(( "Tell My Mom She Can Have My TV And That I Love Her" ))


What have I missed?	Jason Thomas Nichols 2 days ago	Drug 4 days ago	Archive.is 6 days ago

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Quote of the Now

	“	By the end of this century, if temperatures keep rising, the average temperature on earth could go up another 4 to 8 degrees. What I'm saying is, The planet's on fucking fire... you idiots. Grow the fuck up. You're adults now.	„
	—Bill Nye

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Did You Know...

From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:

...that some stupid bitch got paid $6 Million Dollars because she claimed that she's addicted to and was traumatized by Instagram and Facebook?
...that Chuck Norris died? Get ready for a resurgance of Chuck Norris facts like how he's not really dead and is just taking a long nap.
...that it's St. Patrick's Day and 40% of the drunk driving deaths on this day will happen between midnight and 2:59 am?
...that some loser with too much money and not enough brains actually paid $14.6 million for a 1969 Fender Stratocaster that was played by Pink Floyd's David Gilmour?
...that The Seahawks Beat The Patriots 29-13 at this year's Superbowl? We're always happy to see The Patriots lose
... that boomer lawmakers are trying to ruin the internet with KOSA and other "bad internet bills" in the USA? You should tell them what you think, at badinternetbills.com!
... that another Valentine's Day has come and gone and you're still all alone? Are those voices in your head starting to become more persuasive?

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+				{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}|<center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}}}</center> |{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-2 day}} | <center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-1 day}}}}</center>|<center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-1 days}}}}</center>}} }}
 				<p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">[[ED:POTNS|Suggest a Featured Picture]] &bull; [[ED:POTN|View the PotN Archives]]</p>
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-				<div class="nodlyoutube" align="center">{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}}} | {{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-10 day}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-10 day}}}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-20 days}}}} }} }}</div>
+				<div class="nodlyoutube" align="center">{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}}} | {{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-1 day}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-1 day}}}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Video of the Now/{{#time:F j, Y|-20 days}}}} }} }}</div>
 				<p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">[[ED:VOTNS|Suggest a Featured Video]] &bull; [[ED:VOTN|View the VotN Archives]]</p>
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