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Article of the Now Goth Goths (Gawths, Goffs, Gawff) are a self-aggrandizing bunch of attention whores, whose special talent is enjoying attention while pretending to disdain it. They especially revel in posturing to incite insult, so that they can say something deep and angsty. The elitist kick they get from this is visible under their pasty pale skin. If under some circumstance the color of something other than skin is in question, assume it's black. Evolutionary social scientists postulate that the Goth represents an early nocturnal bifurcation from the Greb or Greebo lineage, due to its similar preponderance of black clothing, leather, and spikes. However, this pussying-out from the well-established and resilient parent lifeform left Goths unfitted to the niche of moping around miserably in black, which has now been filled by the Emo subspecies. It seems inevitable, therefore, that Goths will become extinct within decades unless new breeding colonies are established. (( Happy World Gawth Day! )) What have I missed? Ebola-chan 2 days ago Scientology Speedrunning 4 days ago Scientology Speedrunning 6 days ago Did You Know... ...On May 3, 2026 a group of Christian Dwarves did a Speedrun on the $cientology L.A. headquarters looking for Tom Cruise? ...On May 8, 1945 the Western Allied Forces defeated the Nazis and made the good part of Germany their Bitch? ...that live streamer Johnny Somali couldn't keep his big-lipped mouth shut and may be looking at more time because he thought he was the World's Smartest Nigger and appealed a sweetheart Prison sentence? ...that some stupid bitch got paid $6 Million Dollars because she claimed that she's addicted to and was traumatized by Instagram and Facebook? ...that Chuck Norris died? Get ready for a resurgance of Chuck Norris facts like how he's not really dead and is just taking a long nap. ...that it's St. Patrick's Day and 40% of the drunk driving deaths on this day will happen between midnight and 2:59 am? ... that boomer lawmakers are trying to ruin the internet with KOSA and other "bad internet bills" in the USA? You should tell them what you think, at badinternetbills.com! Video of the Now Suggest a Featured Video • View the VOTN Archives

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