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Article of the Now

Jew Nersey

After the Dutch and later the Jews successfully purged New York City of any and all Native Americans, set up shop and started civilization anew in the New World, they realized that while Manhattan was a cool place to party, it was kinda small and there was nowhere to dump their empties the next day. Immediately to the south and west was a large swamp, and there was much rejoicing, as the northeast had found a home for all their garbage. That bright new place, that beacon of dumps, was New Jersey (more like Jew Nersey, amirite?). New Jersey is the birthplace of many celebrities who became famous only after getting the fuck out of this shithole.

Guidos In Mesh Shirts, Guidos Having Fake Tans And Guidos That Can't Be Anything But Loud - It's A Joisey Thing

What have I missed?
Morgan Geyser & Anissa Weier was 2 days ago • DINDUNUFFIN was 4 days ago • Kurt Eichenbald was 6 days ago

Edit • Suggest a Featured Article • View the AotN Archives

Quote of the Now

Cartoons for adults have been normalized over the years.
No more "cartoons = for kids" mentality that got him banned.
Bring back Joe Camel.

— RebelTaxi, archive

Set by User:CrackRabbit on 2026-1-26 • Expires 2026-1-28

Edit • Suggest a Featured Quote • View the QotN Archives

Picture of the Now

Set by User:The PolishPrince on 2026-1-27 • Expires 2026-1-28

Edit • Suggest a Featured Picture • View the PotN Archives

Video of the Now

Set by User:The PolishPrince on 2026-1-27 • Expires 2026-1-28

Edit • Suggest a Featured Video • View the VotN Archives

Portals

Did You Know...

From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:

... that it's 2026? You get to make another New Year's Resolution promising that this is going to be the year that you get laid.
... that WhiteDate got doxed and baleeted in front of a live studio audience?
... that Christmas happened? We hope that you got that perverted catgirl that you want to lose your virginity to.
... that Rob Reiner was murdered? You can light up your smokes, once again, without feeling guilty.
... that it's ED’s 21st birthday?
... that Charlie Kirk got a sore throat while giving a pro-gun speech at Utah Valley University?
... that Tristen Alan Leritz raped a 51-year-old woman just because he was a virgin?
... that Elon Musk is White Knighting our favorite piece of Eurotrash ass, Naomi Seibt, because he wants to be French for a day and eat her snail?
... that the Anti-Greta, Naomi Seibt is begging our benevolent God Emperor Trump for asylum because Germany is picking on her?

Edit • Suggest a Did You Know

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-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Article of the Now</h2>
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-            </div>
+        <!-- Article of the Now -->
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+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Quote of the Now</h2>
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Article of the Now</div>
-                <div style="width:95%; margin:5px auto 8px auto">{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Quote of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Quote of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}}} | {{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Quote of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|0 days}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Quote of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|-1 days}}}} | {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Quote of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|-2 days}}}} }} }}
+            <div id="aotn-content">
-                </div>
+                {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Current/AOTN}}
-                <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">[[ED:QOTNS|Suggest a Featured Quote]] &bull; [[ED:QOTN|View the QotN Archives]]</p></br>
              </div>
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt">
+                [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica:XOTN/Current/AOTN|Edit]] &bull; [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Queue|Suggest a Featured Article]] &bull; [[ED:AOTN|View the AotN Archives]]
+            </p>
          </div>
-         <div style="flex-grow:1; -webkit-flex-grow:1; -ms-flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
-            <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+         <!-- Quote of the Now -->
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Picture of the Now</h2>
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px; margin-top:5px;">
-                {{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}|<center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{LOCALMONTHNAME}} {{LOCALDAY}}, {{LOCALYEAR}}}}</center> |{{#ifexist: Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|0 days}} | <center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|-1 days}}}}</center>|<center>{{Encyclopedia Dramatica:Picture of the Now/{{#timel:F j, Y|-2 days}}}}</center>}} }}
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Quote of the Now</div>
-                <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">[[ED:POTNS|Suggest a Featured Picture]] &bull; [[ED:POTN|View the PotN Archives]]</p>
+             <div style="width:95%; margin:5px auto 8px auto" id="qotn-content">
-            </div>
+                 {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Current/QOTN}}
-             <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;margin-top:5px">
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Video of the Now</h2>
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-                <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">[[ED:VOTNS|Suggest a Featured Video]] &bull; [[ED:VOTN|View the VotN Archives]]</p>
              </div>
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica:XOTN/Current/QOTN|Edit]] &bull; [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Queue|Suggest a Featured Quote]] &bull; [[ED:QOTN|View the QotN Archives]]
+            </p>
          </div>
      </div>
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+    <!-- Right Column: Picture and Video of the Now -->
-            <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
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-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Portals</h2>
-                 {{:Main Page/Portals}}
+        <!-- Picture of the Now -->
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Picture of the Now</div>
+            <center id="potn-content">
+                {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Current/POTN}}
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+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica:XOTN/Current/POTN|Edit]] &bull; [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Queue|Suggest a Featured Picture]] &bull; [[ED:POTN|View the PotN Archives]]
+            </p>
+        </div>
+        <!-- Video of the Now -->
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px; margin-top:5px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Video of the Now</div>
+            <div class="nodlyoutube" align="center" id="votn-content">
+                 {{Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Current/VOTN}}
              </div>
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica:XOTN/Current/VOTN|Edit]] &bull; [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:XOTN/Queue|Suggest a Featured Video]] &bull; [[ED:VOTN|View the VotN Archives]]
+            </p>
          </div>
      </div>
-    <div style="display:flex; flex-wrap:wrap; align-items:flex-start; display:-webkit-flex; -webkit-flex-wrap:wrap; -webkit-align-items:flex-start; display:-ms-flexbox; -ms-flex-wrap:wrap; -ms-align-items:flex-start;">
+</div>
-        <div style="flex-grow:1; -webkit-flex-grow:1; -ms-flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
-            <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Did You Know...</h2>
-                <div style="float:right; margin-left:0.5em; pointer-events:none;">[[File:Moarknow.png|150px]]</div>
-                <p style="font-style:italic;">From Encyclop&aelig;dia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:</p>
-                {{:Main Page/did you know}}
-                <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;"><span class="editor-show">[[Special:EditPage/Main Page/did you know|Edit]] &bull; </span>[[Special:NewSection/Talk:Main Page/did you know|Suggest a Did You Know]]</p>
+<!-- Portals Section -->
-             </div>
+<div class="portals-row" style="display:flex; flex-wrap:wrap; align-items:flex-start;">
+    <div style="flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Portals</div>
+             {{:Main Page/Portals}}
          </div>
      </div>
-    <div style="display:flex; flex-wrap:wrap; align-items:flex-start; display:-webkit-flex; -webkit-flex-wrap:wrap; -webkit-align-items:flex-start; display:-ms-flexbox; -ms-flex-wrap:wrap; -ms-align-items:flex-start;">
+</div>
-        <div style="flex-grow:1; -webkit-flex-grow:1; -ms-flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
-            <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Good New Articles</h2>
-                {{:Main Page/ED:GNA}}
-                <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">Visit the [[:Category:GNA|Good New Articles category]] to see them all!</p>
+<!-- Did You Know Section -->
+<div class="dyk-row" style="display:flex; flex-wrap:wrap; align-items:flex-start;">
+    <div style="flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Did You Know...</div>
+            <div style="float:right; margin-left:0.5em; pointer-events:none;">
+                [[File:Moarknow.png|150px]]
              </div>
+            <p style="font-style:italic;">From Encyclop&aelig;dia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:</p>
+            {{:Main Page/did you know}}
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                <span class="editor-show">[[Special:EditPage/Main Page/did you know|Edit]] &bull; </span>
+                [[Special:NewSection/Talk:Main Page/did you know|Suggest a Did You Know]]
+            </p>
          </div>
-        <div style="flex-grow:1; -webkit-flex-grow:1; -ms-flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
+    </div>
-            <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+</div>
-                <h2 style="border:none; text-align:center; font-size:28px; font-family:sans-serif; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Articles That Need Help</h2>
-                {{:Main Page/ED:BNA}}
-                 <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">Visit the [[Portal:BNA|Bad New Articles Portal]] to help out!</p>
+<!-- Articles Section -->
-             </div>
+<div class="articles-row" style="display:flex; flex-wrap:wrap; align-items:flex-start;">
+    <!-- Good New Articles -->
+    <div style="flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Good New Articles</div>
+            {{:Main Page/ED:GNA}}
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                 Visit the [[:Category:GNA|Good New Articles category]] to see them all!
+            </p>
+        </div>
+    </div>
+    <!-- Articles That Need Help -->
+    <div style="flex-grow:1; box-sizing:border-box; width:300px; border-radius:5px; background:#ababff; padding:5px; margin:2px;">
+        <div style="border-radius:5px; background:#ebebff; padding:5px 10px 10px 10px;">
+            <div style="border:none; text-align:center; font-family:sans-serif; font-size:28px; font-weight:bold; margin-top:.2em;">Articles That Need Help</div>
+            {{:Main Page/ED:BNA}}
+            <p style="text-align:center; font-size:8pt;">
+                Visit the [[Portal:BNA|Bad New Articles Portal]] to help out!
+             </p>
          </div>
      </div>
-     {{:Main_Page/footer}}
-</div>__NOTOC__
+</div>
+{{:Main_Page/footer}}

Main Page: Difference between revisions

Revision as of 07:49, 17 August 2025

Jew Nersey

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