- Portals
- The Current Year
- ED in the News
- Admins
- Help ED Rebuild
- Archive
- ED Bookmarklet
- Donate Bitcoin
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.
User:Schnookums
Sweep & Mop
Main Page
Current Threat
Article of the Now

When a young black man is shot and killed by a responsible white police officer, other blacks will hold a ceremony to honor the dead in which they burn cars, throw rocks, and destroy businesses. The sound of crying, screeching, and chest thumping is intermingled with chants of, "He dindu nuffins!" which is often assumed to be in English "He did not do anything!" This is, of course, a lie, since the phrase itself is grammatically incorrect; literally, it is the Ebonics of the phrase "Did not do nothing" which is a double negative, therefore, they "did something." Black people will shout this and attempt to gain sympathy from bleeding-heart liberals by talking about how "Black Lives Matter," while still making ample time to loot the local CVS or tip over police cars.
| Kurt Eichenbald 2 days ago |
Internets 4 days ago |
MLK 6 days ago | |
Video of the Now
Picture of the Now

Quote of the Now
—Søren Kierkegaard | ||
Did You Know...
- ... that it's 2026? You get to make another New Year's Resolution promising that this is going to be the year that you get laid.
- ... that WhiteDate got doxed and baleeted in front of a live studio audience?
- ... that Christmas happened? We hope that you got that perverted catgirl that you want to lose your virginity to.
- ... that Rob Reiner was murdered? You can light up your smokes, once again, without feeling guilty.
- ... that it's ED’s 21st birthday?
- ... that Charlie Kirk got a sore throat while giving a pro-gun speech at Utah Valley University?
- ... that Tristen Alan Leritz raped a 51-year-old woman just because he was a virgin?
- ... that Elon Musk is White Knighting our favorite piece of Eurotrash ass, Naomi Seibt, because he wants to be French for a day and eat her snail?
- ... that the Anti-Greta, Naomi Seibt is begging our benevolent God Emperor Trump for asylum because Germany is picking on her?
Current Threat
- January
New Year's Day (1st) • Martin Luther King, Jr. Day (3rd Monday)
- February
Valentine's Day (14th)
- March
Saint Patrick's Day (17th) • World Bipolar Day (30th)
- April
April Fools' Day (1st) • ED Rebirth Day (15th) • An Hero Day (20th) • 420 Day (20th)
- May
Star Wars Day (4th) • Mother's Day (2nd Sunday) • World Goth Day (22nd)
- June
Autistic Pride Day (18th) • Father's Day (3rd Sunday)
- July
Independence Day (4th)
- August
Friendship Day (4th) • Women's Equality Day (26th)
- September
Labor Day (1st Monday) • 9/11 (11th) • International Talk Like a Pirate Day (19th)
- October
World Animal Day (4th) • National Cat Day (29th) • Halloween (31th)
- November
Veterans Day (11th) • OldDirtyBtard (17th) • Thanksgiving (4th Thursday)
- December
World AIDS Day (1st) • Encyclopaedia Dramatica (10th) • Christmas Eve (24th) • Christmas Day (25th) • Kwanzaa (Dec 26th-Jan 1st) •
New Year's Eve (31st)
{{Videoframe|vf1|margin:0 auto 1em auto;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold;
|<center><youtube>HhZLb-YuvF0</youtube>
;Weasel vs. Cat</center>
}}
{{Morphquote|mq1|margin:0 auto 1em auto;|font-weight:bold;
|Hello world!|
}}
{{Collapsegallery|Gallery|cg1|center|<gallery>
File:Schnookums dis bread it ermine.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery>
File:Schnookums dis bread it ermine.jpg
</gallery>}}
{{story|1=<pre style="background-color:white;border:0;padding:0;">
Hello, world!
</pre>|2=black|3=white|4=250px|scroll=y|text=black}}
{{story|1=[[File:Schnookums pounce.jpg|center]]<br />Hello, world!|2=lightgray|3=white|4=250px|scroll=y|text=black}}
{{frame|[[File:Schnookums great great grandfather.jpg|image|right|200px]]|border=lightgray|background=white|margin=auto}}
{{quote|Hello, world!|center=auto}}
[[File:Schnookums winter.jpg|right|180px]]
{{center|<big>'''[[Article]]'''</big>}}
{{center|<big>'''[[Article|(( ARTICLE ))]]'''</big>}}
{{recentlyfeatured|ARTICLE1|ARTICLE2|ARTICLE3}}
{{Timeline|Featured article MONTH DAY, [[2014]]|[[Article]]|[[{{PAGENAME}}]]|Incumbent}}
<span class="morphMaster" id="slidePaging1Master"></span>
<div style="font-weight:bold;margin:0 auto;text-align:center;width:800px;">
<div style="height:200px;overflow-y:scroll;margin-bottom:5px;padding:5px;">
<div id="slidePaging1Content1">[[File:Schnookums exploring.jpg]]</div>
</div>
<span id="slidePaging1LinkPrev">Previous Slide</span> | <span id="slidePaging1LinkNext">Next Slide</span>
</div>
<div style="padding-bottom:1.5em;text-align:center;white-space:nowrap;"><span class="morphMaster" id="sectionMaster"></span>
<span style="{{roundy|.9em}}background-color:white;border:3px solid lightgray;color:lightgray;font-size:150%;line-height:150%;padding:.5em 1em;">
<span id="sectionLink1">Section 1</span> |
<span id="sectionLink2">Section 2</span>
</span></div>
<div id="sectionContent1">
{{quote|1}}
</div>
<div id="sectionContent2">
{{quote|2}}
</div>
<gallery caption="Gallery" widths="300" heights="300" perrow="2">
File:Schnookums serious.jpg
</gallery>
{{Collapseobject|co1|Hide|Show|0}}
<div class="co1">
[[File:Schnookums delicious berries.jpg]]
</div>
Alamo
Kligzward • Honest Abe • Motor Oil • Annatar Scott • Sony Vegas • WikiShitizens
Adopted weasel
Friendly observer
On the forums I am a neutral observer who is loved by all. I take great pride in what I do.
-
This happens when I am mistaken for a shitposter.
-
I work 14 hours a day. It isn't easy but I always smile.
-
Sometimes I take a break.
Miscellaneous

-
My great-great-grandfather proudly defended the lulz.
-
Editing the wiki.
-
OMG
-
Summer
-
Winter
-
Now it's personal.
-
These berries... so delicious.
-
Go away.
-
It's on!
- You were a newb at some point.
So help others achieve greatness.
|
|
|

|
|
| SIEG HEIL BANN STAR! This user is a member of the
|
|
|
Schnookums is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
| #MEEPCREW PRIDE WORLD WIDE :^) This user has proven their worth to ED under the guidance of the holy Pope Meepsheep and has been named an honorary member of the prestigious #Meepcrew. As a result, they will likely show excessive love for catgirls, admiration of Lil B, undying support of the black homosexual community, Adventure Time avocation, and rampant Pynchon fanboyism. Keep in mind they are your intellectual superior, but you can be this cool too someday! Please enable them with channel ops and powerful hallucinogens at all opportunities. |
|
Schnookums |
|








