Modern Warfare 2

This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example,
HOLY SHIT RUSSIA INVADES THE WHITE HOUSE, COMMANDER SHEPHERD IS A TRAITOR! HE SHOOTS GHOST, ROACH AND THEN BURNS THEIR CORPSES FOR THE LULZ. CAPTAIN PRICE IS ALIVE AND HE USES A NUKE TO FUCK OVER THE MACHINES SO RAMIREZ CAN TAKE BACK THE WHITE HOUSE. SOAP AND PRICE HAVE A RIVER RAFT RACE WITH SHEPHERD WHICH CULMINATES WITH SHEPHERD GETTING A KNIFE IN THE EYE!!! (P.S. REZNOV DIES AFTER THE SECOND MISSION IN BLACK OPS AND MASON IS ONLY HAVING HALLUCINATIONS OF HIM IN ALL OTHER MISSIONS).!!!1

Modern Warfare 2 also known as Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 to COD fags and Camp: The Game to assholes who don't wanna admit that they just can't play the fucking game. It is the highly successful sequel to Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare and the best game ever. The game was commercially successful and universaly praised by critics for it's engaging gameplay, beautifully rendered and realistic environments, blockbuster campaign, and the $200 pair of night vision goggles that came with the super special edition of the game. Of course it's the best selling thing to ever hit the PS3, XBOX 360, PC, Wii and Sega Dreamcast. According to the sales records, you and everybody in your home own at least two copies.

Story

Taking place 5 years after COD 4, you play as a gajigabizillion different characters with no fucking personality whatsoever. You run around the world, fucking up the days of 3rd world country soldiers who just want to eat some shit that's not radioactive or filled with agent orange. About halfway through the game, shit starts hitting fans and everything goes wrong:

Level #4: You go undercover as a Ruskie and shoot a bunch of people at the airport, before getting shot in the head yourself.
Level #6: The Whitehouse is invaded by Russians who sodomise Barack Obama repeatedly.
Level #10: You rescue Captain Price from a prison that he's in for no reason.
Level #11: You defend Burger King from Russians abusing free refills at the Coke machine.
Level #12: You begin to regret this when he launches a nuclear missile at the International Space Station.
Level #14: You win back the Whitehouse and take advantage of Obama's corpse.
Level #15: Commander Shepherd is evil and fucks Roach and Ghost over via gunshot to the balls.
Level #18: You hunt down Shepherd and put a knife in his eye.
Level #100: ????
Level #9001: Profit for Infinity Ward.

There's a shitload of other useless levels that have no relevance to the story or anything else in existence.

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Special Ops

Just shitty parts of the campaign with timers put on them to make them more challenging, beating the times earns you manly stars to attach to your cock and impress the ladies.

Multiplayer

	“	This game is actually, really, not that bad!	„
	—Typical war mongering faggot who enjoys playing this liquified abortion of a game.

	“	Goddamn fucking black personfaggot Mexican jewbag buttpirate! I know you hack!	„
	—What you'll usually hear after you kill someone multiple times.

	“	Xbox Live matches consist of 20 to 30 minutes of listening to what sounds like 10 year old girls saying things about your mother whilst attempting to shoot you. And then they fail miserably, and cry about camping while you use a totally legitimate strategy to defeat them.	„
	—Anonymous

	“	Woah lighten up its just a game	„
	—what typical faggots say after people yell at them for camping their asses off.

	“	So what that we lost, Im still better than you	„
	— what every body says after losing.

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Knowing that the ADD ridden customers would shift their attention to something else at the conclusion of the five minute campaign, Infinity Ward decided to create an alternate game mode where the Aspies could frolic amongst each other without leaving the safety of their Grandmothers' basements. Proving a success to antisocial-fags and paraplegi-fags with access to the tubes, tens of thousands of the gullible consumer whores gather each day to partake in an ancient ritual known as "Pwn1ng N008s"

Modern Warfare 2 features a wide variety of weapons and perks so you can tailor your loadout to suit your gameplay style. Common play style architects include:

Camper: The second most common player type, campers hide like a like bitch in the corner until an unsuspecting victim turns their back and provides the player a chance to make his move. Used weapons include Assualt rifles for a moving kill, sniper rifles for a stationary target and the combat/throwing knife when (He thinks) there are no enemies around and to brutally embarress their prey.
Booster: Exclusively for Trolls and people who suck at direct combat, they work from the shadows, building up a kill streak until they get some banhammer of a booster to rape their enemies/teammates. Commonly used weapons include sniper rifles, claymores and whatever else can be used to kill from a safe distance.
Sniper: The least common class and the only one possessing skillz, they enjoy seeing the enemy's cranium bursting into a crimson cloud of pwnage. Used weapons include sniper rifles and combat knives for ultimate humiliation. (Often fall into the category of camper)
Noob: The most common type of player, they employ the tactics of all previous types, but fail in successfully executing said techniques. Common weapons include grenades, the biggest assualt rifle/pistol they can find (n00b tube included), RPGs, l33t snip3rer r1fles and screeching pre-adolescent mic spam.
Predator Missile: AN UNHOLY BEACON OF DEATH AND DESTRUCTION THAT EXISTS ONLY TO FUCK YOUR SHIT UP, IT IS HEAVEN, IT IS HELL AND IT DOES NOT MISS!!!
Griefer: A player who can give two shits less and pisses off other players for the lulz. You can easily spot griefers by seeing anyone spawn on a hardcore match with a RPG.

The Sniper in action.

There's a booster boosting my booster.

Modern Warfare 2 Playas

The average player is a disgruntled 20-something year old with a fetish for War and almost always has a deep loathing for Koreans, Germans, Vietnamese, Arab or anybody else who Americunts have waged war on in the last million years. When not reading through war hero novels, reverting changes made to the Vietnam War Wikipedia page or just going to anti-abortion rallies to sure up the numbers of new troops, you can bet your ass they'll be screaming at some 10 year old kid on Modern Warfare 2 and telling bleeding heart stories about soldiers they never met. Another interesting part of the MW2 player's psyche is that they truly believe playing the game has made them into a trained killer with senses honed many times greater then the average man and the ability to silently take out an entire room of armed Russian extremists with nothng but a combat knife. If ever you see one in the street, (Identifiable by a grim expression, at least one article of khaki clothing and a habit of shooting any non-black person minorities a death stare) please prove them wrong with a swift kick to the testicles and a gunshot to the head.

Expansion Packs

Stimulus Package

Things were good at Infinity Ward; Modern Warfare 2 had sold like black person in the 18th century and the offices were lined with gold and jewels. But all was not well; the pathetic amount of multiplayer maps included on MW2's disc were failing to capture the attention of consumers and they threatened to go back and play a better game with more maps, rather than fuck around on boring dirt mounds for barely valid bragging rights. So the head warlock programmers got to work on making 10 new maps to satisfy the needs of the players, a good portion of which were unoriginal ports of maps from previous games.

Of course, the retards at home ponied up their precious cash for the craptacular map pack, and never complained again lest they be raped by the overworked level designers at Infinity Ward.

Resurgence Pack

After discovering that they didn't have enough traded in gold fillings and diamond plated wheel rims that the lowly peasants traded in for the last map pack to satisfy their Jewishness, they once again reached into their magic portal to the dimension of best selling shit and pulled out 5 moar maps (only 3 of which are actually new), and threw them up onto the game marketplace for a few billion dollars. No guesses as to what happened next; every idiot who owned the game and even a couple who didn't proceeded to buy several copies each and fap to the slightly more varied selection of dungeons to earn sweet XP in.

He's a stealth clown...yup.

	“	I love this game and I bought both map packs. I like the first map pack, but I am not crazy about the second one that much, although I don't regret buying them at all. You have to think about the value that you get for the money. I have spent $89.99 on the game and dlc and have logged close to 12 days playing time between the single player and multiplayer. Thats about $0.32/hr for me to play the game. Better than the price of admission for any movie. Sure, there are problems camping the game and there are things I wish they would fix. (I don't care about boosters...they are fun to hunt down and the hate msgs that you get from them afterword are fun too) For the amount that people complain about the game (hacks, boosters, glitches...mostly boosters) there are always a ton of people online. I can't wait for Black Ops to come out and hope that it is as good as MW2 is.	„
	—Lucky26

We Fucked What Up?

The majority of MW2 players use hacks

Sometime last Thursday, Infinity Ward decided to release a patch for the Xbox 360 that was to coincide with the new Stimulus package, in order to make online play and matchmaking more fun. The only problem was that the morons at IW were unaware of how beta testing, a timetable or synchronization, worked and fucked up royally in the process, releasing the DLC before the Patch. What followed next could only be described as lulz of epic proportions; matchmaking was for the most part rendered inoperable, and gamers everywhere found themselves unable to find any matches or enjoy the awesome fifteen dollar DLC they just downloaded. Even gamers who refused to pay for this shit got nailed by the same bug. Infinity Ward is now scrambling to fix their fuck up, but in true retard fashion, they're getting nowhere fast.

UPDATE: After a month of non-stop shenanigans and resignations from the company, IW has finally announced that a new patch is coming out that will fix the recent fuck up with the Xbox 360's matchmaking. Only time will tell if the patch in question actually fixes the problem or leads to more lulz.

How to Troll MW2 Fanbois

Seeing as how every MW2 player in the whole world has some sort of retardation/emotional sensitivity problem/aggression enhancing tumor sticking out of their cranium, their feelings are about as stable as those of a 35 year old British Virgin on the rag. This makes trolling them not only easier, but also gives better results as they aren't used to being picked on from inside their airtight, plastic bubble.

Mention Halo in any positive way, the Warfaretards will proceed to engage in a heated argument with you about MW2's realistic graphics and large player base (Half that of Halo 3) until their crusty brains will overheat and they proceed to team-kill you until the match ends.
Spam your n00btube infinitely by using Scavenger (walk over bodies to pick up 'nades) or One Man Army (switch classes to replenish 'nades).
Team-kill someone multiple times until they start sending you retarded messages about playing the game properly, post on Youtube and give a username so everybody can troll rush them on Ecksbawks LIEV.
Make any kind of gay joke, MW2 fans are notorious fag bashers and insinuating that they play for the other team will make them furiously masturbate to girl only porn (But not lesbian porn 'coz homosexuality is wrong) until all doubt of sexuality is washed from their minds.
Grief in any form, their underdeveloped caveman brains will catch fire as they struggle to comprehend what's happening.
Mention any similarites between the Battlefield: Bad Companies and MW2, yeilds same results as mentioning Halo times ten. Extra points if you say that Jew/Haggard could kick Soap's/Ghost's ass.
Say anything about their Mom/Dad, it doesn't even have to be offensive, they'll still get defensive over someone else talking about the woman/man who breast fed/took care of him his whole life.

The MW2 Trolling Game: The only thing MW2 is actually good for, find a couple of friends online and enter matchmaking, have your mics and troll faces ready. Get a pen and paper, write down the rules and prepare for the grief of a lifetime.

Team Kill: 1 Point
Camp Kill: 1 Point
Get Angry Reply: (Insulting/Arguing) 1 Point
Get Furious Reply: (Yelling) 2 Points
Get Team Killed: (By Pissed Off Player) 3 Points
Box Teammate Into Corner: 2 Points
Boxed Teammate Doesn't Kill You to Get Out: +5 Points
Booster Kill: 5 Points
Successfully Use Hax: 5 Points
Cause Rage Quit: 10 Points

The Infamous 4th Level: "No Russian"

One day while monitoring playthroughs of every violent video game released that month, the concerned mothers at FAUX News came across the 4th level in MW2, in which you gun down hundreds of Russian civilians and the Russian S.W.A.T team who came to defend them. Bricks were shat and the FAUX News team called head of the Earth Defense Force, Jack Thompson. Every douche with a camera flocked to the gates of Infinity Ward's castle and waged a five year war on the villains clearly guilty of crimes against humanity.

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	“	players can join a group of Russian ultranationalist terrorists and massacre civilians with assault weapons in an airport.	„
	—how2play

	“	Video Games: are they training your child to become an apt insurgent of terror?	„
	—Fox News

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Opposing comments from actual players, who clearly disprove FOX News' accusations that violence in video games can impede social development.

	“	I shot them once and watched them and went up to them and i went up to them and chot their leggs off and them i tbag them and then i watch them die slowly	„
	—A fine youth from GameFAQs.

	“	I killed as many as I could, then I played the level again and killed more. Then I went again and killed AGAIN because every civilian ever needs to die.	„
	—...

	“	Is it a bad thing if this level gave me a boner :(	„
	—A sadist has been catered to.

	“	hey look civilians. pop pop pop. There now you're dead. Oh look some more. You guys want some. here have some. Oh you too. here, share this around. Give some to your friends. Fun for the whole fucking family. Not enough yet. Die some more you little bastards. Hey wait. why are there no children in this airport. I wanna tbag some children. At least I can.. WTF why did Makarov just shoot me?	„
	—Thoughts running through the players head whilst enjoying a good game of No Russian

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Eventually all the Christ-loving skanks at FOX News gave up when the great warriors of Infinity Ward plugged up the bitches' holes with their chrome plated cocks of justice, keeping Tacgnol at bay and holding off Catnarok off for another thousand years.

Battlefield: Bad Company 2 vs. MW2 - Battle for Mount OlympFPS

For Millenia the war has waged about who is the better FPS, Battlefield or MW2. Modern Warfare fags argue that the fact everybody is playing MW2 and not Battlefield proves that MW2 is better. Battlefield fans however argue that the fact MW2 players aren't all playing Battlefield is the reason it's better. This once and for all proves that Modern Warfare 2 is a pile of shit game with no players over the age of 13 that aren't fucktarded and the declining quality is due to the fucktards who play it and not the game itself.

This makes IW look just like westburo

A fair and balanced comparison of Camp Battle 2 and Bad Company 2

Totally unbiased. Totally.

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Gallery

Modern Gallery 2 About missing Pics

Beta version of boxart.

Beta version of boxart.
Most Soad game evr! LULZ
Even Square Enix, the producers of Final Fantasy join the bandwagon by releasing this game to the Japs.
Ghost: The character everyone wishes they could play as because Ghost sounds a lot cooler than "Roach". Just like Ghost, a typical gamer's face is aesthetically deficient.

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The FAL, continuing the tradition of semiauto guns only usable by people jacked up on massive amounts of coke or using a mod controller.
The Genome soldier from Metal Gear Solid makes a reappearance in Modern Warfare 2, quite different games. Infinity Ward is quite original in their approach of developing characters.
The Strawberry Jam Edition cover for the Lady Gaga fanboys.
OMG SNEAK PEEK!

OMG SNEAK PEEK!
Well played, sir.

Well played, sir.
A typical Modern Warfare 2 thread on /v/
PS3-Specific version of the game
Typical Killstreak. "Friendly Predator Missile Inbound!"
Typical MW2 Board

Typical MW2 Board
MW2 players caring about Hæti

MW2 players caring about Hæti
Typical Modern warfare 2 player.
Describing his tour in Vietnam.

Describing his tour in Vietnam.
Hitler supports dedicated servers. Why would you???

Hitler supports dedicated servers. Why would you???