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Jacob Sockness

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Jacob Sockness looks like it was written by pseudo-intellectual 13-year-old boys.
Look out for unfunny Uncyclopedia bullshit, boring in-jokes, and angsty teen-ery.
You could also add in actual humor.
This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(


Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
This article is paid for by taxpayers like you.
Thanks, America.
Jacob Sockness
Born April 1st, 1983
Nationality Americunt  
Residence San Francisco, California
Occupation Black Magick Practioner



   
 
Null and the Kiwi Farms is full at fault. They won't be forgiven, nor will my wrath be light... I love you; my Christine. My love for you can never die, for it is an immortal love.
 

 
 

—Jacob Sockness

About

Jacob Sockness is an unironic simp of Christian Weston Chandler turned a-logger. He is your typical retard furry who believes in black magic and wants to be in a gay relationship with Chris Chan. He lives in section 8 housing in San Francisco (we know this because he doxxed himself) so all the degenerate shit he's into is encouraged by his surroundings and funded by your tax dollars. Not much is known about his early life though, but the leading theory is that he was a used condom that mutated after being thrown into one of San Francisco's designated shitting streets. However, he does have a large online footprint EVERYTHING HAS BEEN FUCKING BALEETED. This man's spergery is lost media. He posted his phone number on Reddit: 415-745-1899.


File:Sockness.png
This is what happens when you vaccinate your kids

Autism

Jacob's autism can be described as the bastard love child of A-Log and Erik Mokracek's hyper obsession and ass burgers. This is shown in his unhealthy obsession and cyber stalking of Chris Chan, as well as his new age-y pagan lifestyle. For the latter look at the gallery, it's too autistic to be described by words.

File:SpiritualAutism1.png

Jacob and Chris

Starting in mid 2018, Jacob began to obsess over Chris Chan. Initially he was the typical ween but then he started to develop actual romantic and sexual feelings for Chris. Due to him being a plushophile, he actually made a makeshift Chris out of an old stuffed doll and ragged clothing he had lying around, probably harvested from a hobo. He would then go onto Reddit, where he would go onto long posts about how he wanted to spoon Chris and make him his sex slave. Obviously this made him hated on numerous subreddits, including the Chris Chan one. (archive)

Special Surprise!

Online Accounts

See Also

Jacob Sockness is part of a series on Dying Alone

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Jacob Sockness is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

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