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Delicious Cake: Difference between revisions
imported>Sburke Cake vs pie, pertinent issues. |
imported>Zenihd Rol Attempting to make it less of a fucking mess. |
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__NOTOC__ | __NOTOC__ | ||
{{crap}} | |||
{{Warning|This article is not to be confused with the [[unfunny]] meme ''The cake is a lie''. See [[Portal]] for that shit.}} | |||
[[Image:Cakecensored.jpg|thumb|200px|The original.]] | [[Image:Cakecensored.jpg|thumb|right|200px|The original.]] | ||
[[Image:House cupcake.gif|frame|left|[[House]] showing [[Anonymous|anons]] [[Doing it right|how it is done.]]]] | [[Image:House cupcake.gif|frame|left|[[House]] showing [[Anonymous|anons]] [[Doing it right|how it is done.]]]] | ||
[[Image:Chinacake.jpg|thumb|200px|This picture isn't cake. It's an illusion. Or, rather, [[lie|a lie]].]] | |||
[[Image:Chinacake.jpg|thumb|200px|This picture isn't cake. It's an illusion. Or, rather, [[lie|a lie]].]] | |||
'''Cake''' [[unfunny|is apparently NOT a lie]]. [[NOM NOM NOM|Cake is delicious and thus... you must eat it]]. | |||
'''Cake''' | |||
Since time immemorial, [[B|people]] have wanted their cake and they have wanted to eat it too. Oh, but if only life was that simple. Unfortunately, there always seems to be [[FBI|something]], or Jew, trying to prevent [[you]] from getting your hands on delicious cake and eating it. It is at times like these that [[Brenda Williams|one]] must go to extraordinary measures to get at that delicious cake you so crave. | Since time immemorial, [[B|people]] have wanted their cake and they have wanted to eat it too. Oh, but if only life was that simple. Unfortunately, there always seems to be [[FBI|something]], or Jew, trying to prevent [[you]] from getting your hands on delicious cake and eating it. It is at times like these that [[Brenda Williams|one]] must go to extraordinary measures to get at that delicious cake you so crave. | ||
| Line 21: | Line 13: | ||
Fortunately, the [[sick fuck|scientists]], [[aspie|mathematicians]], [[developers|engineers]], [[retard|physicists]] and [[drunk|metaphysicists]] at [[4chan]] are working around-the-clock posing every conceivable hypothetical situation one might find oneself in, vis-à-vis delicious cake, and the ultimate prize– enjoying said deliciousness. | Fortunately, the [[sick fuck|scientists]], [[aspie|mathematicians]], [[developers|engineers]], [[retard|physicists]] and [[drunk|metaphysicists]] at [[4chan]] are working around-the-clock posing every conceivable hypothetical situation one might find oneself in, vis-à-vis delicious cake, and the ultimate prize– enjoying said deliciousness. | ||
[[Image:beanz.jpg|thumb|right|[[Doing it wrong|You are doing it wrong.]]]] | |||
A Delicious Cake thread starts when the [[OP]] posts a potentially problematic situation involving delicious cake and you, with regards to your getting at and ultimately eating the delicious cake. The [[Terri Schiavo|brain trust]] at [[B|/b/]] then lets loose a barrage of posts with potential solutions to this horrible dilemma. This originated from the old Super Mario 64, where the final reward for weeks of wasted life was the [[Whore|Princess]] deciding to "make a Delicious Cake. For Mario!" | |||
this is just like (5x7)/5 = 7. problem/(problem - you and cake) = you and cake. | [[TL;DR|It is a little known fact, but all cake problems can be solved by maeking the problem divide by (the problem - you & cake), which results in just you and cake. | ||
this is just like (5x7)/5 = 7. problem/(problem - you and cake) = you and cake.]] Simple. | |||
The following is a neatly demonstrated example... | The following is a neatly demonstrated example... | ||
=='''The Hypothetical Predicament:'''== | |||
[[Image:Cake.png|thumb|center|400px|[[How do I shot web|How do I enjoyed delicious cæk?]]]] | [[Image:Cake.png|thumb|center|400px|[[How do I shot web|How do I enjoyed delicious cæk?]]]] | ||
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[[Image:The_Solution.jpg|thumb|450px|center|[[OM NOM NOM NOM]]]] | [[Image:The_Solution.jpg|thumb|450px|center|[[OM NOM NOM NOM]]]] | ||
<br/>''' | <br/>'''[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] Version''' | ||
[[Image:Obstacle course.JPG|thumb|900px|center|Special Encyclopedia Dramatica theme, with only a gun, hockey stick and big purple dildo. Add your solution if you end up completing it.]] | [[Image:Obstacle course.JPG|thumb|900px|center|Special Encyclopedia Dramatica theme, with only a gun, hockey stick and big purple dildo. Add your solution if you end up completing it.]] | ||
| Line 90: | Line 83: | ||
==Did you know that...== | ==Did you know that...== | ||
*{{strike|[[lie|The cake is a lie.]]}} You see the ending? The cake is right fucking there! | *{{strike|[[lie|The cake is a lie.]]}} You see the ending? The cake is right fucking there! Joke's over now! | ||
*[[Some argue|Cake is always better than pie]] because [[You|nobody]] has gotten off their lazy asses and invented proper ''pie frosting'' yet. No, meringue doesn't count, you fucking whore. | *[[Some argue|Cake is always better than pie]] because [[You|nobody]] has gotten off their lazy asses and invented proper ''pie frosting'' yet. No, meringue doesn't count, you fucking whore. | ||
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<center><youtube>CydAhobAQS8</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>CydAhobAQS8</youtube></center> | ||
<center><youtube>YzWXItodrww</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>YzWXItodrww</youtube></center> | ||
<center><youtube>dy_WqicWcHg</youtube></center> | |||
<center><youtube>iK4iR_stpoo</youtube></center> | <center><youtube>iK4iR_stpoo</youtube></center> | ||
Note that the fatty in the last video is doin' it wrong. | |||
==Quotes== | ==Quotes== | ||
{{quote|'''First you will be baked, and then there will be cake.'''|GLaDOS}} | {{quote|'''First you will be baked, and then there will be cake.'''|GLaDOS}} | ||
{{quote|'''But there's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.'''|GLaDOS}} | {{quote|'''But there's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.'''|GLaDOS}} | ||
{{quote|[[Vagina|'''It's so delicious and moist...''']]|GLaDOS}} | {{quote|[[Vagina|'''It's so delicious and moist...''']]|GLaDOS}} | ||
{{quote|'''The cake is a lie.'''|[[Meme|Doug Rattmann scribbling]] from ''[[Portal]]''.}} | |||
{{quote|'''The cake is a lie.'''|[[Meme]] from ''[[Portal]]''.}} | |||
{{quote|'''Let them eat cake.'''|[[France|Marie Antoinette]] Actually not true, as [[wikipedia]] [[fact|proves]] [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake].}} | {{quote|'''Let them eat cake.'''|[[France|Marie Antoinette]] Actually not true, as [[wikipedia]] [[fact|proves]] [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_them_eat_cake].}} | ||
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</gallery>|<gallery> | </gallery>|<gallery> | ||
Image:2girls1cupcake.jpg | Image:2girls1cupcake.jpg | ||
Image:Why don't you become a computer technician.gif|Indubitably. | |||
Image:Caniblism.jpg|Being [[Anal|served]] delicious cake. | Image:Caniblism.jpg|Being [[Anal|served]] delicious cake. | ||
Image:Caketard.jpg|"This is caketard. FEAR HIM!!1!" | Image:Caketard.jpg|"This is caketard. FEAR HIM!!1!" | ||
Revision as of 21:27, 1 August 2011
| Warning! This article is not to be confused with the unfunny meme The cake is a lie. See Portal for that shit. |



Cake is apparently NOT a lie. Cake is delicious and thus... you must eat it.
Since time immemorial, people have wanted their cake and they have wanted to eat it too. Oh, but if only life was that simple. Unfortunately, there always seems to be something, or Jew, trying to prevent you from getting your hands on delicious cake and eating it. It is at times like these that one must go to extraordinary measures to get at that delicious cake you so crave.
Fortunately, the scientists, mathematicians, engineers, physicists and metaphysicists at 4chan are working around-the-clock posing every conceivable hypothetical situation one might find oneself in, vis-à-vis delicious cake, and the ultimate prize– enjoying said deliciousness.
A Delicious Cake thread starts when the OP posts a potentially problematic situation involving delicious cake and you, with regards to your getting at and ultimately eating the delicious cake. The brain trust at /b/ then lets loose a barrage of posts with potential solutions to this horrible dilemma. This originated from the old Super Mario 64, where the final reward for weeks of wasted life was the Princess deciding to "make a Delicious Cake. For Mario!"
The following is a neatly demonstrated example...
The Hypothetical Predicament:

-
"Combining physics with soul food. I call it soul science."
-
"Shoop the nigraz to eat delicious caek."
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"Now you're thinking with Jules Verne."
-
"Sacrificing an infant to Cthulhu and invoking him to devour Detroit is just one possible solution.""Sacrificing an infant to Cthulhu and invoking him to devour Detroit is just one possible solution."
-
Use physics
-
Dig/fly
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Tunnel
-
"Welcome to the Aperture Science Enrichment Center..."
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"There's a hole in the sky..."
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"...Through which things can fly."
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"Now you're thinking with Portals."
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"Longcat is helping you enjoy delicious caek."
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"Solution for the lemmings level."
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"Best Solution."
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"Final Solution."
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"Divide By Zero"
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"Pacman detour"
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"Barrel Roll"
From The Peanut Gallery:

Solutions in 3 Dimensions
The Hypothetical Predicament:
The 3D Solution:

A Second Hypothetical Predicament:

The 3D Solution:

Encyclopedia Dramatica Version

Women and Cake

Believe it or not, about 100 years ago, women by law, were expected to bake delicious cake for their men. And if said cake was anything short of fucking delicious... and I mean motherfucking delicious, it was common practice that she be told to return to the kitchen to bake at least a dozen more 'till the man was satisfied. If said woman was insulting enough to bake no less then said dozen cakes, buttsecks was required... no lube.
Did you know that...
- The cake is a lie. You see the ending? The cake is right fucking there! Joke's over now!
- Cake is always better than pie because nobody has gotten off their lazy asses and invented proper pie frosting yet. No, meringue doesn't count, you fucking whore.
Videos
Note that the fatty in the last video is doin' it wrong.
Quotes
—GLaDOS | ||
—GLaDOS | ||
—GLaDOS | ||
—Doug Rattmann scribbling from Portal. | ||
—Marie Antoinette Actually not true, as wikipedia proves [1]. | ||
Cake Galleries
-
Now that's a puzzler!
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Other foods may be used to your advantage
-
Delicious cake is sometimes elusive.
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Solved with science!
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Solved with the dark arts!
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Sometimes the solution to a complicated problem is the most simple. (PIME TARADOX)
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Sometimes you need some help from outside sauces.
-
EFG makes an appearance!
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Now you're thinking with Portals.DOIN' IT WRONG, if he had read it, it's portal-proof. -
Sometimes the eternal quest for delicious cake can even throw off the most hardened crusaders.
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How Does I Failed At Cake-Defense?
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Final solution: go to Wal-Mart.
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And... wins? (also, another at http://www.doink.com/clips/esnipplee/1014983/cake-challenge-solution)
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MEANWHILE
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Solved with shaman power
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BEHOLD, TEH POWER OF MSPAINT!!!
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The Matrix owns you... and your Delicious Cake.
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Dude... you just exploded and imploded my mind.
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FAIL
-
Solve with bombz!
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biologically solved handycap
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There is no non-violent solution... it's Cho Time!
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Solved, and NO violence.
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Difficult, but not impossible.
-
Solution is FEDEX!
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Looks like a tough one...
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One solution.
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Another solution.
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And a third.
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some faggot didn't think of walking around the maze
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Defeated by MSpaint in ten seconds
-
3D solution wins again
-
Easy as
pieCAEK!
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IT IS DELICIOUS CAKE. YOU MUST EAT IT.
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You Must Eat It!
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CHOCOLATE FROSTING!?
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Even kitty liek delicious cæk!
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Could it be? THE CAKE IS NOT A LIE?!?!?!?!!11 EAT IT! EAT IT NOWWW!!!1one BEFORE IT BE GONE.
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OBEY.
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Indubitably.
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Being served delicious cake.
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"This is caketard. FEAR HIM!!1!"
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On Christchan, Delicious Christ comes to you!
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"It is Delicious Cake. You Must (
eat) Lick It!". ;P -
Lolis are cake too!
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I heard you must eat it. OM NOM NOM NOM
-
Eating ass is okay when IT IS DELICIOUS.
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It's a piece of cake to bake a delicious cake.
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Use Portals. Win caek!
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OM NOM NOM NOM
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MOAR delicious caek!
-
Solved
-
You have to respect the motherfucker that took the time to put this together.
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Other delicious things can be lies.
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LIES
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This is what happens when nerds work at Dairy Queen.
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I think it is self-explanatory.
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Some people have too much spare time.
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Cake can be awesome.
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Doing it wrong
-
Not all cake is delicious.
-
Another example of a cake that you should nevar eat.
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There's probably no cake.
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A Nazi cake.
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HTMLXML cake.
See Also
External Links
- Supreme Court Rules Restaurant Patron Must Try This Cheesecake — It is law... you must eat it!
- DelicousCake.Wazdat.Com - this is a website dedicated to collecting the delicious cake of the internet, eat it, you must.
|
Delicious Cake is part of a series on Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage. |