Anders Behring Breivik

	“	So I herd u liek cultural marxism?	„

Anders Behring Breivik

Born	February 13, 1979
Nationality	Björk Björk
Highscore	Killed 93, now revised to 77 :( Injured 96, 151 319 :)
Style	FPS, Single Player / Bomberman
An Hero	No (Surrendered)
Title	Justiciar Knight Commander of the Knights Templar
Rank	1st Place!11! 2nd: Woo Bum-kon 3rd: Martin Bryant 4th: Cho Seung-Hui 14th: Tim Kretschmer 17th: Nidal Malik Hasan

The Justiciar Knight Sir Anders Behring Breivik is a Norwegian social commentator, raging Christfag, Zionist IRL troll and a pretty cool guy who became a national hero on 22 July 2011 by getting a new high score. Being a kike-loving knight who killed nothing but Aryan cultural Marxists (named Mohammed), Sir Anders is widely believed to have initiated the first double-reverse lollercaust. Perhaps the leading irony of his crusade against socialism is that the 'punishment' for his crimes will be no more than spending the next twenty years in a state-paid hotel, thanks to Norway's socialist laws and leftard soft-on-crime attitude. Ultra-mega-hyper trolling achieved.

Some media outlets are claiming a total tally of 8 for the bomberman mode and 68 for the FPS camper survival mode, thus putting Sir Anders ahead of Cho's all time high score and attaining a L-L-L-Ludicrous kill, together with returning the pride to Europe after years of American supremacy.

While he didn't pussy out and an hero, he did pussy out by surrendering instead of building a MacGuyver style helicopter and airlifting out. Hell, it took the police two hours to show up and MacGuyver's only an hour long show. Current theory suggests he wanted to be captured so that we may all know his name and properly credit him with the new largest number of IRL frags.

In the trial he also stated that wikipedia was his greatest inspiration to do what he did, which shows that wikipedia is for once useful for something.

Always do what the police says.

The reaction of the internet.

Humble beginnings

In the years prior to his blaze of glory, Anders tried repeatedly to become a successful businesswoman. After running several shady companies into the ground, he instead decided to move into his mother's basement, where he would spend his days playing World of Warcraft and Call of Duty, while planning his bloody revenge on the filthy Muslims and Communists who were clearly to blame for his utter lack of success.

But unlike other reclusive, smelly weirdos with failed dreams of greatness, Mr. Breivik could indeed both talk the talk and walk the walk, and after 8 years of planning and scheming, he was finally ready to immortalize himself.

The plan of attack: How do I shot 69 campers?

Breivik fights for the Occident

After two hours of lulz, the REAL party van arrives.

In a nutshell.

The Norwegian taxpayer also bought him a nice suit, as is custom when you beat a high-score.

Primary weapon:- Ruger Mini-14 rifle with holographic sight

Secondary weapon:- Glock 17 pistol with Extended mags

Equipment:- C4 (Fertilizer bomb IRL)

1. Perk 1: UAV Jammer (police uniform IRL)
2. Perk 2: Stopping power (because he used hollow point bullets IRL, lol n00b)
3. Perk 3: Double tap

Sir Anders initiated his quest for the high score by detonating a fertilizer bomb in downtown Oslo. He then dressed up as a policeman and went behind enemy lines like a spy. Pretending to secure the area following the initial explosion, he escaped the blast zone and made his way to Utopya Island where the viking commies hold their annual bacchanalia. Smiling genially, he invited his victims to gather round (they believed he was a policeman coming to save them) before unloading on them with his Ruger Mini-14 rifle and Glock 17 pistol.

His battle plan (3 years in the making!) was masterful, demonstrating the strategic acumen and tactical know-how of a latter-day Napoleon. He selected a remote island battlefield which both delayed reinforcements and prevented the retreat of the enemy socialists who were asking for it. He then created a diversion, donned camouflage, and finally, with surprise on his side, he struck.

The attack was an all-out success. With help arriving in a timely fashion (90 minutes later), Sir Anders could take his sweet time, search every tent, climb every hill, snipe every swimmer, chase the enemy looney tunes-style up and down every path, and double tap anyone lying on the ground to be extra sure - which came in handy since a lot of them pretended to be dead. The 600 category A and B traitors on the island were completely helpless before our hero's shattering onslaught.

Graded Score

Kill count: 20/20

Accuracy: 19/20

Style:15/20

Butthurt: 20/20

Bonus: Reduced Prison Sentence: 18/20

Total Score: 92/100 and/or A+

And so a new high score was born.

Police action

• Special forces arrive at the Oslo explosion site.
• Campers call the police and all they get is a 'shut the fuck up and clear the lines'.
• After at least 100 calls the local police realize something's up, but wait 8 minutes to finish their coffee and donuts.
• Special forces are dispatched to the island. They choose to drive.
• Smokey the Bear abandons the campers.
• 30 minutes later they arrive at the lake shore.
• They jump into the toy boat that had been prepared for them in advance, which shuts down half way across the water.
• An hour and a half after the first shots were fired they get to the island and find Anders bored and waiting for them.

The last words 76 people heard

His manifesto

He plagiarized parts of it from the Unabomber.

Quotes from the 1500 page manifesto

“   Everyone who criticises Islamisation or multiculturalism and supports Israel are labelled as racists, fascists and Nazis anyway. Europeans are getting increasingly immune against the multiculturalist labelling techniques. More and more people understand that Islam is not a race, but a hateful political ideology.   „     —Sieg Heil to that- Its funny because Nazis like Islam.     “   Any category A, B or C traitor is an individual who has deliberately used his or her influence in a way which makes him or her indirectly or directly guilty of the charges specified in this document: 1-8. Many of these individuals will attempt to claim ”ignorance” of the crimes they are accused of. This strategy might work for them until the day when they are visited by a Justiciar Knight – their judge, jury and executioner.   „     —Whatchoo gonna do when they come for you?     “   I had the privilege of meeting one of the greatest living war heroes of Europe at the time, a Serbian crusader and war hero who had killed many Muslims in battle. Due to EU persecution for alleged crimes against Muslims he was living at one point in Liberia. I visited him in Monrovia once, just before the founding session in London, 2002.   „     —He's got a partner in crime, his shit is equally dope.     “   Being a potato farmer might be unattractive now but is likely to be extremely useful in the future...   „     —You said it.     “   If you are unwilling or incapable of killing women due to the principles of chivalry you should probably steer away completely from the armed resistance movements and should probably consider creating yet another right wing blog instead.   „     —Sir Anders, separating the men from the boys.     “   Being a Justiciar Knight will involve killing our targets indiscriminately. You will face women in battle and they will not hesitate to kill you. If you hesitate as much as a second due to the fact that your opponent is female you will fail. You must therefore embrace and familiarise yourself with the concept of killing women, even very attractive women.   „     —Sir Anders, smacking the bitch up.     “   At 2 AM on the New York subway not long ago, I saw another scene—more dispiriting than my KFC encounter with the rowdy rapping teens—that captures the essence of rap’s destructiveness. A young black man entered the car and began to rap loudly—profanely, arrogantly—with the usual wild gestures. This went on for five irritating minutes. When no one paid attention, he moved on to another car, all the while spouting his doggerel. This was what this young black man presented as his message to the world—his oratory, if you will.   „     —A "NO NIGGERS" policy might be in order Previous Quote | Next Quote

Misc. quotes

	“	One person with a belief is equal to the force of 100,000 who have only interests	„
	—His sole post on Twitter

	“	I apologize to militant nationalists all over Europe for not being able to kill more traitors.	„
	— A humble Sir Anders accepts his sentence.

The irony of it all

The death of Amy Winehouse probably won't get any attention at all. This man has done us a favor. Sadly, she got way more hits and much more BAWWWWWing than Norway over her tragic death. On the bright side, she's dead now.

JEWS DID 7-22

Main article: Jews Did WTC. Do the math yourself: 9 - 2 = 7, 11 * 2 = 22. 9/11 times 2 = 7/22.

	“	Many argue that Mr. Breivik was in fact executing orders from Mossad, to punish the Palestine-loving Marxist-governed Norway, but first and foremost to create a false banner for misinformed right-wing extremists to unite under, and that what he was doing was a "false flag" operation.	„
	—Varg Vikernes

	“	So now not only Christians kill Muslims, and vice versa. Right wing extremists are supposed to kill left-wing extremists too – and vice versa I assume? Is that the plan? You did this to recruit and make even the right-wing extremists fight for the Jews? "benefits from this? Israel does! The Jews do! None of our aggression will be directed at them – were it all should be directed. We will be fighting each other instead, whilst they move about in the background, out of the spotlight, and profit from our suffering, and in secret tighten the chains of slavery around our waists and ankles.	„
	—Varg Vikernes

	“	He is a Freemason too, and that certainly doesn't make any sense whatsoever. Freemasonry is international Jewry at it's worst; they too are working for a de-construction of all nations on Earth, and to build a global Hebrew temple, enslaving us all under the will of the Jews and their servants, the Freemasons.	„
	—Varg Vikernes

	“	What Mr. Breivik has said is largely true, in all except in what he doesn't say; he doesn't tell us that the Jews are the origin to all these problems, and that they were created by the Jews to hurt us. All we have to do to make this act of violence favourable to us is to make this clear to everyone; the Jews created Marxism, feminism, Christianity (need I tell you that Jesus and not least Paulus/Saul were both Jews?), so-called psychology, banking ("money lending"), the hippie-movement and all other ideologies and movements which are aimed to destroy and de-construct all nations in Europe. Behind each and every one of them you will find a Jew (or some times a Freemason)!	„
	—Varg Vikernes

	“	His manifest is vast, some 1500 pages, and he is pretty thorough in both what he says and what he did. There are a few facts that doesn't make sense to me. How can he list all the problems caused by different Jews in our history and yet fail to mention even one of them with a single word in his manifest? He attacks the symptoms of the disease Europe is suffering under, but not the cause of the disease.	„
	—Nothing escapes Varg

Previous Quote | Next Quote

Use scrollbar to see the full image

Crafty jews are at it again

Sø Cåsh!

Hey Faggots,

My name is Anders, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are multicultural Muslim socialists who spend every second of your day defiling the European master race. You are everything bad in Europe. Honestly, have any of you ever killed any category A traitors? I mean, I guess it’s fun mixing with Muslims because of your own insecurities, but you all take this to a whole new level. This is even worse than not being blond.

Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I am a body builder, a Justiciar Knight and a 5th level Freemason. What revolutionary action did you take, other than “posting on an image board”? I also have a full epic resto druid and a filthy Muslim socialist (I've just killed her; Shit was SO cash). You are all category Z multicultural candy-asses who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

Pic Related: It’s me and my socialist victim.

File:AndersSoCash.jpg

Dox

You and me both, baby!

Name: Sir Anders Behring Breivik
Address: Hoffsveien 18
Zip: 0275
City: Oslo
Country: Norway
Phones: +47 900 87 334 / +47 22 44 78 53

Scratch the above.

It is unconstitutional for them vikings to keep their inmates incommunicado. Send the knight your thanks to Halden Prison, Norway

Main Address: KRIMINALOMSORGEN HALDEN FENGSEL POSTBOKS 694 4305 SANDNES

Office Address: KRIMINALOMSORGEN HALDEN FENGSEL Justisveien 10 1789 BERG I ØSTFOLD

Address to contact inmates like Sir Anders, the justiciar: KRIMINALOMSORGEN HALDEN FENGSEL Pb. 1094 1787 BERG I ØSTFOLD

Telefon: +47 69 21 46 00

Besøkstelefon: +47 69 21 46 51

E-post: [email protected]

(be sure to specify it is against their inmates human rights not to allow them communication with the outside world.) Indeed it is. Anders hasn't been held incommunicado at least since the trial ended. Feel free to send a letter of admiration and/or your slightly used underpants (white girls only).

The Spa years

Breivik's plan includes a two decade seclusion into a luxury resort on an island among the fjords. There he'll be able to practice potato agriculture, maybe write the second part to his manifesto and fight Cultural Marxism in the library while sipping a Cappuccino courtesy of every grateful Norwegian taxpayer.

Music

The music accompanying the propaganda video which Breivik uploaded to video sharing sites including YouTube at the same time that he published his manifesto, comes from the Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures soundtrack. Breivik writes of Bøksle's voice that it is the perfect sound to listen to when one commits acts of martyrdom. During his trial he also testified that he uses this music, particularly the song "Ere the World Crumbles" when he meditates, as he did in preparation for his attacks.

Gallery

Gallery About missing Pics

• 
• 
  Jellyous much?
• 
  I SMITE THEE IN THE NAME OF GOD!
• 
  I accidentally Breivik

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

• 
  Son I am proud.
• 
• 
  U MAD?
• 
• 
• 
• 
  Now available on Steam.
• 
• 
  The savior of Europe on his younger days...
• 
  Godspeed, good Sir Knight!
• 
  Spectator view of the match
• 
  /pol/ currently heads the leaderboard.
• 
  All warfare is based on deception.
• 
  YEAAAH!!!
• 
• 
  Troof!
• 
  Its funny cause it's true!
• 
• 
• 
  Anders Behring Breivik Posing for the media as a cop after his bomb went off. Next stop summer camp.
• 
  Anders Behring Breivik spotted in photo, disguised as a cop, pretending to help victims of his own bomb attack.
• 
  Anders being Oh exploitable.
• 
  Anders trolling and being Oh exploitable.
• 
• 
  In 98 Easy Lessons!
• 
  Should have gotten the scavenger perk.
• 
  Show a leftie either of these T-Shirts for much lulz.
• 
  They left him no choice.
• 
  You know you want to.
• 
  Breiviks best friend.
• 
• 
  Now on discount!
• 
  Breivik in court, shedding tears of proudness over his 1337 video editing skills.
• 
  He will have plenty of time to practice his trollface.
• 
  Breivik getting a pat on his shoulder by a colleague.
• 
  Justifiable homicide
  mah boi!
• 
  You know you wanna suck that cock.
• 
• 
  Anders Breivik likes big boobs
• 
• 
  He just wants to play
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
  Actions speaks louder than words
• 
• 
  This is the consequence of trusting cops
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
  The perception of Leftards
• 
  This Comic doesnt show how Anders Breivik imagine his detention, no it illustrate the conditions of detention in norwegian prisons
• 
  Its just feel good to do it
• 

Commemoration ceremony disrupted by infamous blogger

Erik with his poster

A commemoration ceremony in Liverpool was disrupted[1] by the infamous blogger Erik Ribsskog. Erik (41) is reported to have shouted several times, "followed by mafia, don't get rights." He also held up a poster with the text "Followed by mafia. Don't get rights. Protest."

See also

• Norway
• High score
• Columbine
• Virginia Tech
• Liberalism
• Charles Whitman
• Mark Essex
• Nevada-tan
• Ali Sina
• Aurora Theatre Shooting
• Dragon Age II - Also features a charming, blonde mass murderer called Anders.

External links

Personal accounts

• Screenshots of his (now baleeted) facebook account

Other shit

• Victim account of the events
• His manifesto
• The video he uploaded to Youtube before the shooting
• The victims Amongst them were many filthy hippies & emokids, doubling the win.
• New Formula 1 racing-team announced.

Featured article July 25 & July 26, 2011
Preceded by Amy Winehouse	Anders Behring Breivik	Succeeded by PeanutFreeMom