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Doug Walker: Difference between revisions

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How many pages does one man need? Fuck.
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[[Image:Ncvsigowned.jpg|thumb|center|500px|Doug Walker: even the [[Irate Gamer]] thinks he's shit.]]
'''[[Doug]] Walker''' ''(a.k.a The Nostalgia Critic, That Guy With The Glasses or simply That Guy'') is a terrible [[faggot|actor]] who performs a multitude of extremely [[unfunny]] routines ripping on terrible actors, exclusively for [[TGWTG|Thatguywiththeglasses.com]]. He is one of the site's co-founders and the first person to contribute to the site. He is in many ways similar to his friend and co-contributor [[The Spoony Experiment|TheSpoonyOne]], because both fail in every possible way. Doug is directly responsible for the creation of [[at least 100|numerous]] [[forced meme]]s, perhaps more than any other single human being in history. He relies on these in all his work, particularly his Nostalgia Critic reviews, as he posesses no actual talent, and more often than not, knows nothing about the material he's reviewing. His other methods of generating [[anti-lulz|lulz]] include [[screamer|screaming]], [[BAWWW|whining]], [[crossover|having lots of cameos]], and completely ignoring the source material to make jokes that take 5-minutes to deliver.
 
[[image:dougwalker.jpg|thumb|Doug Walker, wondering where his hair went]]
[[image:Doug'sNutsack.png|thumb|Doug's nutsack.  People at [[TV Tropes]] are known to die of orgasm upon seeing this.]]
[[image:NC_shirtless1.jpeg|thumb|Or this.]]
He is also said to produce [[vuvuzela|the most annoying sound known to man.]]
 
==[[Nostalgia|The Nostalgia Critic]]==
[[File:Nostalgia critic background.gif|thumb|left|The Nostalgia Critic.]]
[[File:Doug Walker's Yearbook Picture.jpg|thumb|right|Doug's yearbook picture, complete with [[Chris-chan]] glasses and [[fedora]], looking even more like a [[pedophile]] than usual.]]
[[File:Nostalgia Critic Meets His Fans.jpg|thumb|right|Nostalgia Critic meets his fans.]]
[[File:nostalgiaIncontinence.jpg|thumb|left|Releasin cont(in)ent once a week.]]
[[File:He Married Her, So You Don't Have To..jpg|thumb|left|Doug, pictured here with his [[fat]], [[ugly]] [[hambeast]] of a wife. He married her, so you don't have to.]]
 
==Doug Quits His Job==
In 2009, after [[faggot|Doug]] started making $53,000 off of his [[shit|shows]] on ThatGuyWithTheGlasses, on top of making the site $11,000 in donations, he decided that being a [[Chris-Chan|household name and Grade-A celebrity]] meant that he could make possibly the stupidest decision in his life: quit his day job as an illustrator. Because having a steady source of income in an uncertain economy is overrated, right? He may realize what a stupid decision he made when his site [[truth|inevitably fails and goes under, since it has become a bloated and unwatchable mess, teeming with talentless hacks and pathetic manchildren]].
 
Common sense dictates that one approach a career change in some manner commensurate with the job security of the target career, and no one would rate [[Internet Celebrity]] as a particularly secure job.  No, in fact, ''most people'' would tend to view it as easily the riskiest fucking job prospect imaginable; consequently, ''most people'' would take careful measures to ensure their old job remains a viable fallback.  Well, ''most people'' don't share Doug's sense of [[USI]], which motivates him to treat the whole affair as though he had just sold [[Failbook|Facebook]], strutting about his soon-to-be-former workplace with camera-weilding Rob in tow, as Doug imagines himself putting it to the man, but actually manages only to annoy and insult his former coworkers.
 
 
 
<center><youtube>D9uFooSFACA</youtube></center>
 
<center>'''Doug Walker: even fucking obnoxious in real life.'''</center>
 
Of course, it's not like he can ever get a real job again, since he burnt as many bridges as he could while quitting. No sane employer will hire somebody with a video like this haunting them. Let's hope that his current job as being an unfunny hack lasts!
 
==Doug's Other Characters==
 
In addition to The Critic, Doug has a number of other characters at his disposal. Some of them have their own series of videos, while others just make cameo appearances whenever they're needed. Either way, you'll have plenty of opportunities to see them, as one of them is bound to show up if Doug can't get [[TGWTG|some other contributor on the site]] to make a cameo appearance in his latest Nostalgia Critic review. Most of these characters are played by Doug, his brother Rob, or M. Night Shyamalan. Below are some of Doug's more well-known characters.
{{clear}}
 
===[[confusion|That Guy With The Glasses]]===
[[image:Thatguykickassia.png|thumb|left|200px|That Guy With the Glasses. The character, not the website or the guy who plays the character.]]
As if we didn't have enough things calling themselves "That Guy With the Glasses", this asshole shows up and adds one more to the pile. That Guy is Doug wearing a bathrobe while pretending to be a [[chris chan|dangerous psychopath]] who acquired a large amount of money by [[prostitution|some unknown means]]. He does the "Ask That Guy" routine where he answers questions in disturbing ways and generally tries to be as [[offended|offensive]] as possible.
{{clear}}
===[[Unfunny|Chester A. Bum]]===
[[image:ChesterCSpoonyrippsoff.jpg|thumb|left|200px|This is the greatest [[wiki]] he's ever seen in his life.]]
A homeless man wearing a [[South Park|Stan Marsh]] hat with a severe [[drug]] addiction (Because making fun of homeless people makes you look like a nice guy, [[amirite]]?) who somehow is able to afford tickets to whatever movie is playing at the time. He then posts "bum reviews" giving [[awesome|his opinion]] on it. Like the Nostalgia Critic, Chester's "reviews" are basically plot summaries, but instead of being full of screaming and cameos, it's full of drug-induced nonsense. Doug gives his actual [[opinion]] at the end of the review, but it's in the form of a single line on the "The End" card. An example is "But seriously, it's okay." Great reviewing skills, right?
{{clear}}
 
===[[Fanfiction|Dominic]]===
[[image:marioporn.jpg|thumb|left|200px|An illustration of what one of Dominic's stories is like.]]
 
A bartender who supposedly works at a bar that a lot of 90s [[Video Game]] characters go to for a drink. There they tell Dominic stories about their personal lives, usually having to do with [[sex]], [[drugs]], or just being [[batshit insane]]. Dominic then relays these stories to [[you]] through a series of videos called "Video Game Confessions". The stories [[My Immortal|almost always portray people horribly out of character and frequently ignores their canon]]. This might be excusable if they were actually [[funny]], but they are really about as entertaining as watching grass covered in wet paint grow. For a (speculated) example of Doug's tendency to fuck up the canon of beloved game characters, he made an [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/vgcon/27139-solid-snake unfunny video starring Solid Snake, and how he recounts the death of his parents right in front of his eyes]. Wait a second, isn't Solid Snake a clone? Yes, he is. After realizing that he completely fucked up thanks to the many angry emails from [[Aspie|Douchey McNitpick]] on how he got Snake's origin story wrong, he covered his ass by making a [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/vgcon/27380-ssfollow follow up video that basically tries to nullify the first one]. Still, that's a pretty huge thing to fuck up on if you're making parody videos with '''popular video game characters.''' The humor also appeals to the lowest common denominator, and this means that the jokes are always painfully predictable. An example: [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/vgcon/24592-ep-10-fox-mccloud LOL HERPDERPDERP STAR FOX IS A FURFAG LOLOL.] Dominic is also supposed to be [[britfag|British]], but even [[Sean Connery]] does a better fake british accent than Doug Walker.
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[Unwarranted Self-Importance|Douchey McNitpick]]===
[[image:doucheyfgsfds.jpg|thumb|left|200px|Doug's opinion of [[you]].]]
 
Perhaps the most noteworthy of Doug's characters is not one used in one of his less popular routines, but rather is Doug's attempt to make fun of the people who [[troll]] him. Because Doug only posts his content on a site he has complete control over, he is not used to handling people who are not [[fantard|mindless drones who applaud his every move]]. So when Doug realized that there were people pointing out inaccuracies in his reviews, he responded by admitting to being wrong with the help of [[sockpuppet|Douchey McNitpick]], Doug's representation of the despicable people who dared to criticize his work. [[unrealistic expectations|He seemed to be hoping that this character would either scare them all away or encourage them to comment on his work similar to how his fans do]] (in other words, not criticize it).
 
Despite what Douchey is intended to do, he's not really much of a troll. His methods of trolling seems to be correcting various [[everything|inaccurate statements]] Doug has made (very minor ones at that) and finishing all his sentences with [[Dick Butt|some sort of childish insult]]. The fact that Doug actually considers this to be trolling shows [[pussy|how sensitive he really is]]. Also rather [[lulz|amusing]] is the fact that Doug decided to call this character Douchey McNitpick, as it's a very good description of the Nostalgia Critic's character.
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[Why So Serious?|Melvin The Brother of The Joker]]===
[[image:Melvinbrotherofjoker.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Melvin.]]
 
One day a film called [[The_Dark_Knight |The Dark Knight]] was released which ruined both comic books and movies alike. The reason being is we see assholes like Doug [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJ6gC_4q9tg make costumes based on Heath Ledger's Joker] who forever ruined the character after Jack Nicholson and Mark Hamill worked so hard to make non comic fags take Batman seriously. Yet Doug didn't get his money's worth with his costume and decided to make an even shittier video, reusing the outfit and calling himself Melvin. This video is what people point to disprove Doug's claims of being a professional improvisational actor. Melvin is the even more aspie version of the Joker and it's absolutely impossible to sit through this entire video. [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/sketches/6026-melvinep1 Go ahead and try for yourself.] Even if you get drunk ahead of time you'll sober up before the one minute mark. The most dedicated of [[Fucktard |TGWTG fans]] who did sit though this voiced out against Doug slamming him for producing the biggest piece of shit besides all of his other work which somehow is never an issue. This was the first and last time outside of his stupid Top 11 Fuck Ups videos you will see Doug cave into creative criticism. Doug later apologizes for it and is facing several dozen lawsuits for putting young children into comas for watching the worst thing imaginable. Well, until Kickassia came out.
 
 
<center><youtube>QILHwuzgSpk</youtube></center>
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[Spider-Man|Dr. Smith]]===
[[image:Drsmithnc.jpg|thumb|left|250px|How about a legion of shitty meme's?!]]
An unholy fusion of a shitty parody, a shitty character, and a shitty [[forced meme]], Dr. Smith is part of Doug's army of recently created characters whose only purpose are to make fun of one movie's bad acting. In this case it is based on the similarly named villain of the 'Lost in Space' movie, who turns into some kind of [[furry|evil CGI spider monster]] near the end of the movie. The only thing Doug's version of Dr. Smith (which looks more like a [[zombie]] than a spider thing) does is talk about [[spider]]s while bouncing around like Chester A. Bum. He is always surrounded by [[fugly]] special effects that make it look even less like he's supposed to be a mutant spider creature.
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[ghost|Casper]]===
[[image:Caspernc.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Casper is not gonna to put up with Doug's shit.]]
A drawing of Casper the friendly ghost, who has the misfortune of being voiced by Doug Walker, and thus is an asshole. As if Doug's voice wasn't painful enough to listen to already, Doug's voice acting for the character is done [[Justin Bieber|in a <s>high-pitched voice</s> even higher pitched voice than usual]]. Fortunately Doug killed(?) Casper at the end of the very same review he first appeared in by [[what|dissolving him in a pool of water]]. Unfortunately, the little bastard lives on in Doug's "Timing!" running gag.
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[less than three|Ma-Ti]]===
[[image:Ma-tinc.png|thumb|left|250px|Ma-Ti.]]
If you're familiar with a cartoon called [http://www.turner.com/planet/ Captain Planet], you may remember how Ma-Ti, the South American kid, ended up with the shitty power of [[heart]] because the writers couldn't think of a better fifth element. You may have even made fun of him; many have, and that's exactly what Doug was doing when he made this character... more than a decade after everyone else stopped giving a shit. Doug's version of Ma-Ti is played by [[India|Bhargav Dronamraju]], Doug's [[Computer Science III|special effects guy]], and is one of Doug's first characters  played by someone other than Doug himself. Aside from his impulsive shouting of the word "heart!" whenever he attacks someone, the only times he's ever talked about anything even remotely Captain Planet-related is in his first appearance and one of [[Linkara]]'s comic reviews. More often he his found acting extremely gay and attacking people for no apparent reason. He always talks like a [[r9k|robot]] with a sinus infection and Doug can't seem to decide whether he's supposed to be the real Ma-Ti or an [[impostor]]. Heeding the cries of absolutely no one, Doug gave the half-character Ma-Ti a major role in the recent shitfest Suburban Knights. Thankfully, he was killed.
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[Meme Combining|Santa Christ]]===
[[image:Santachristnc.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Santa Christ.]]
A character played by Rob Walker. Half [[Santa]], half [[Jesus]]. Pretty self explanatory. Half of his lines consist of [[lol|"HO HO HO!"]] and the other half consists of Rob [[trying too hard]] to seem badass. First appeared in the 2009 Christmas Nostalgia Critic review, but is best known for getting [[murder]]ed by the Nostalgia Critic in 'Kickassia', who summons a tidal wave of cameos to resurrect him, and then dumps him in a bin when that doesn't work. Good job solidifying the [[fact]] that your characters are unlikable assholes, Doug!
 
{{clear}}
 
===[[Scientology|Terl]]===
[[image:Terlspoony.jpg|thumb|left|250px|Spoony even feels the need to fucking do a crossover in an ED article.]]
Like Dr. Smith, Terl was created to make fun of just one movie's bad acting. In this case, a similarly-named evil alien drunkard/psychologist metaphor from [[Battlefield Earth]]. Despite being played by [[Spoony]], he first appeared in the Nostalgia Critic's review for the aforementioned movie, so he can kind of be considered a character for both reviewers. He pretty much does exactly the same thing as Dr. Smith except he insults people more. Originally Terl was supposed to have died at the end of the review due to Doug thinking that [[Fuckin Magnets|radiation is like gasoline vapor]], but Spoony has started using the character in his own reviews, so apparently [[noone cares|he actually suvived]].
 
{{clear}}
 
==Running Gags==
 
{{天
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As mentioned previously, Doug has a ton of [[unfunny|hilarious]] [[shit|jokes]] which he relies heavily on to make his Nostalgia Critic reviews. In most cases, his running gags refer to some previous review where Doug made a 5-minute joke about some otherwise unremarkable scene. Doug's jokes range from [[original]] to flat out [[stolen]] (but most of his recent ones lean toward the latter), and his use of them also varies in terms of how shoehorned-in they are, but no matter what, they are always [[forced]] and ''always'' [[unfunny]]. Because of his status on That Guy With The Glasses, Doug's memes tend to be picked up by lesser contributors fairly quickly, and occasionally manage to go beyond the boundaries of TGWTG and plague the rest of the [[internet]]. Listed below are some of Doug's more noteworthy gags:
 
===[[Street Fighter|"Of Course!"]]===
[[image:bisonyes.jpeg|thumb|Not to be confused with the [[Youtube]] meme involving the same character delivering a line with essentially the same [[Yes|meaning]].]]
"Of Course!" is one of Doug's oldest and most successful <s>forced memes</s> running gags, originating from his review of the [[Street Fighter]] movie. For whatever reason, Doug thought that a clip of [[Dick Cheney|M. Bison]] turning around and saying "Of course!" was worthy of being a meme, [[what|so he started playing the clip every time he mentions world domination.]] Using this meme seems to be a job requirement for TGWTG contributors, as every single fucking one of them uses it at one point or another. Although the meme is rarely used as it's intended outside of TGWTG, the clip itself has become rather popular. The overall character of M. Bison (the movie version), is something of a meme on TGWTG, as evidenced by the fact that [[Trying too hard|Doug spends the majority of Kickassia dressed as the character]].
 
===[[Interior Crocodile Alligator|Big-Lipped Alligator Moment]]===
[[file:powerglove2.jpg|thumb|The infamous scene of [[The Wizard|Lucas]] advertising the Power Glove.]]
Another fairly successful meme created by Doug [[bullshit|(though some claim it was created by the Nostalgia Chick)]], a Big-Lipped Alligator Moment is Doug way of describing [[mindfuck|an extremely fucked-up scene]] that has no relevance to the rest of the movie and is never explained. It was first used in the Nostalgia Critic's review of [[Al Gore|Ferngully]], which had the Nostalgia Chick as a guest star, explaining the [[some argue|debate]] over who created the meme. While less popular among co-contributors that the aforementioned meme, the Big-Lipped Alligator Moment is frequently used by his [[fan]]s to describe situations that fit the criteria. It also has an [http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BigLippedAlligatorMoment ENTIRE FUCKING PAGE] on [[TV Tropes]]. Such is to be expected from them though, as they will suck Doug's dick at any given opportunity.
 
===[[gun|The Gun]]===
[[image:Wheresmymoneybitch.jpg|thumb|This is what Doug wants to do with the gun.]]
Doug's favorite [[plastic crap|prop]] to use in his Nostalgia Critic reviews is a toy gun, which he pretends is real. The first time he pulled out this piece of shit was in his review of [[Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue]], where he used it to become [[an hero]] after hearing a song about how you can say [[no]] to [[Drugs]]. Unfortunately, he was only pretending, so he lived to use the gun in later reviews. Since then he's used it only when he pretends to have a fit of [[rage]] and waves it all over the place. [[Lazy|The effect he uses when pretending to fire the gun is to make the entire screen flash white for a brief moment]]. Anything that gets hit by a [[nothing|"bullet"]] fired from Doug's gun explodes as if it were hit by a rocket. It's unknown if this is supposed to be funny or if Doug actually thinks a tiny pistol can do that sort of damage, but knowing Doug the latter seems likely. You probably would never have thought that a fucking prop could become a forced meme, but sadly, that is precisely what has happened. Many other TGWTG contributors have started carrying toy guns around which they use to unleash their [[fury]] (or kill themselves). [[Linkara]], another TGWTG-exclusive reviewer who frequently cameos in Doug's work, has used not one, but '''five''' different types of toy guns in his comic reviews, taking this particular form of faggotry to a whole new level of patheticness.
 
===[[The Wizard]]===
The Wizard was a 90s movie about an [[autism|autistic]] boy playing [[Nintendo]] games. Since Nintendo is the manchild's [[developers|game developer]] of choice, It has a high appeal among Doug's fans. So naturally it spawned not one, but '''two''' running gags. The first is about the movie's [[ITG|"villian"]], a boy named [[George Lucas|Lucas]], who Doug [[lie|pretends]] to be gay for. His most famous scene involves him blatantly advertising the [[Wii|Power Glove]], which Nintendo couldn't go 5 minutes without mentioning back when they were selling the NES. The other is the [[retarded]] way the main character says [[California|"California"]], which Doug has plenty of of opportunities to use as he [[hypocrite|loves talking abut how bad Arnold Schwarzenegger was at acting.]]
 
===[[Republican|Elephant]]===
[[image:burgerking.gif|thumb|What the [[Burger King]] really does to people who say "elephant".]]
Originated from one of Doug's [[Nickelodeon]] month reviews. While talking about a shitty [[Canadian]] sitcom called [[censorship|"You Can't do that On Television"]], the Nostalgia Critic compares the show's tradition of dumping [[semen|slime]] on anyone who says [[idk|"I don't know"]] to having the [[Burger King]] pop up whenever he says "elephant". As you probably guessed, just that happens. Because it's very hard to come up with a situation where someone would be expected to say "elephant", Doug often uses it to stop a relatively short-yet-noisy scene that Doug looped to make it look more annoying. In other words, [[facepalm|he makes us sit through a scene that was intentionally made more annoying]] just so he could summon the Burger King to [[rape]] you.
 
===[[Doug]]===
Another shitty Nickelodeon Month meme, this time about an extremely [[boring]] cartoon from Nickelodeon's early years. Talking about the cartoon or hearing it's theme song would make the Nostalgia Critic recall being bullied by his [[13 year old boy|peers]] due to him having the same first name as the main character and subsequently make him lose his shit and start [[BAWWW|crying]].
 
===[[Funny|Shrug and Foghorn]]===
[[image:IWasFrozenToday.gif|thumb|Yeah that's pretty Monkey Cheese, Doug.]]
Whenever a character does something stupid in a stereotypical sitcom you would hear a trumpet making a "waa waa waa" noise as someone shrugs in disbelief. Doug started this shit with his [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNH6yFbf0sw Mortal Kombat review.] After a while in future videos he stopped shrugging altogether and just made the noise himself. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6KMbHNxSgjM Yet he made the noise in the most graphic and unfunny manner possible.]
 
===[[Random|"I WAS FROZEN TODAY!"]]===
A scene from some movie [[Hulk Hogan]] starred in where [[dumbass|Christopher Lloyd]] gets in an argument with Hogan and randomly decides to inform him that he was, in fact, frozen earlier that day. It's apparently funny because the phrase doesn't fit in any conversation other than the one in question, despite the fact that this can be said about a lot of movie lines. Probably used because Doug can get away with referencing it any time.
 
===[[Azn|Mako]]===
[[image:Mako.jpg|thumb|Rest In Pizza, Master Splinter.]]
A byproduct of Doug's [[clueless]]ness, Mako is a dead [[azn]] known for his deep, scratchy voice, and his tendency to play roles as old wise men. He had quite a few fans, so when when Doug made fun of his voice acting in a [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]] movie (which he played near the end of his life), fans [[rage]]d and made lots of angry comments. What they didn't realize is that [[idiot|Doug had no idea who Mako was or that he was dead]] so soon afterward he apologized for the remark and assured his fans he does not dislike Mako. Since then, he has always been hesitant to make fun of Mako, who appeared in several movies the Nostalgia Critic reviewed afteward.
 
===[[Chuck Norris]]===
[[image:Chuckfamilyguy.jpg|thumb|Hey Lois! Remember that time Doug brought this shitty meme back?]]
Fuck off Doug, not only did you blatantly steal this meme, but you resurrected one that '''everyone''' was happy to see die.
 
===[[Rape Clock|Timing!]]===
Whenever Caper the Ghost appears to point out bad timing. It's also something that Doug's comical routine lacks.
 
===[[MST3K|I'm Acting!]]===
Something Joel and the bots said all the time on MST3K when pointing out shitty actors dialogue.
 
===[[Telephone|Celebrity Phone Calls]]===
Doug sometimes [[lonely|pretends to have a conversation with someone]] who acted in the movie he's currently reviewing. Usually this results in him using a well-known recording of the celebrity [[Mel Gibson|swearing at someone over the phone after having consumed a large amount of alcohol]] and pretending they're angry at the critic for criticizing they're work.
 
===[[Slowpoke|Scary Slow-Mo]]===
Yet another Nickelodeon month gag (Yes, Nickelodeon month really was ''that'' bad.) originally used in his retardedly misinformed ramblings about [[Rugrats]]. When talking about [[USI|Angelica]], he slowed down her "evil" laughter to make it sound [[x/|scarier]]. He's reused this in several other reviews to show how [[cockmongler|unintentionally creepy]] some lines in kids' movies are. Obviously, it's another fucking pointless part of the reviews that are only meant to stretch out the running time because Doug couldn't think of anything else to say.
 
===[[Armake21|"Fucker" Phrases]]===
There are numerous points in the series when the Nostalgia Critic [[steals|invents]] a catchphrase where, to make it funny, he adds "fuck" to it in any variation. In one instance, to parody the movie "My Pet Monster" and the fact that nobody was really reacting with terror when they noticed that the main character had transformed into a blue ball of shit, Doug played an unfunny skit where he walked into another room to find his [[faggot|brother]] wearing a dinosaur mask, who proceeded to proclaim [[FYIAD|"I'm a fucking dinosaur.]]" Because adding fucking to every catchphrase equates to [[shit|comedy gold]]. While this specific example may turn into a forced meme in itself, another more-well known example is "ZUUL, MOTHERFUCKER, ZUUL." or simply saying motherfucker in anything, like "'''[[gay|TASTE THE RAINBOW MOTHERFUCKER]]'''!"
 
===[[Batman|A Bat Credit Card?!]]===
Originates from the Batman and Robin review. Uttering these words forces Doug to go ape shit and viewers to quickly mute the video. Even he admitted he is fucking sick of fans saying this to him IRL, but he still encourages them by 'tarding out because "it's what they expect". This shows just [[batshit|what kind of fans Doug has attrached to his site]]. And how much Doug would go through for a couple of bucks from internet ads.
 
Typical NC Fan: "Hey Doug, I've got a Bat credit card! Go apeshit for me and I'll give you $10,000! '''DO ET FAGGOT, or I'll download AdBlock!!!'''"{{clear}}
 
===[[Coke|Frying the Coke]]===
The Critic's first attempt to create a forced meme he's actually aware of. First used in his review of Double Team, Doug was afraid [[Nobody gives a fuck|nobody would give a fuck]] and so he used it again in his review of The Tommyknockers, in which he explained it again in detail in case not every of his [[12 year old]] fans got it the first time. [[Shit nobody cares about|Basically it's used when someone makes something so ridicolous and dumb that you find it awesome.]] Expect him to make more shitty references in future to force this meme even more.
 
[[Lulz|Fun]] [[Fact|Fact]]: [http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Frying%20the%20Coke On the Urban Dictionary], the first and best voted entry you find says that's, indeed, just a shitty forced meme. Way to go, Doug!
 
===[[Fat Larry's Band|Randy Newman]]===
Making its debut in his review of James and the Giant Peach, the Critic decided his impersonation of Randy Newman was ''so'' hilarious that he also included it in his reviews of The Tommyknockers and Felix the Cat - The Movie. However, due to the fact that neither of these two movies have ''anything'' to do with Randy Newman, the joke stopped being funny after the James and the Giant Peach review.
 
==January: Shitty Gimmick Month==
[[Image:NostalgiaCriticSequelMonth.gif|thumb|left|250px|This man used to be employed as a fucking artist.]]
 
The New Year is very good at bringing out the very worst of the Nostalgia Critic, for every January Doug devotes an entire month to something specific and completely fucks the whole thing up less than halfway through. In 2009 he declared January to be "[[Nickelodeon]] Month". What you may not realize is that although the Nostalgia Critic's cutoff date is 2000, [[I don't watch TV|he stopped watching cartoons somewhere in the early-mid 90s]], which means he's devoted an entire month to talking about a tiny fraction of Nickelodeon's 20+ year history. He did have the courtesy to do some research on a few of Nick's mid 90s shows like ''Hey Arnold'' and ''Kenan & Kel'', and by research we mean he watched a single episode on [[youtube]] and just made assumptions about what the other episodes were like. For the self proclaimed voice of [[manchildren]] everywhere, Doug certainly doesn't pay much attention to what happens to the things he grows up with, does he?
 
One year later, he declared January to be [[Arnold Schwarzenegger|Schwarzenegger month]]. If you're not aware, Doug has a strange obsession with trashing every movie The Governator has ever appeared in and saying he's the worst actor in history, so he basically devoted an entire month to something he already talks about all the fucking time. In his attempts to find the perfect example of how [[Irony|Arnold is an untalented hack]], he instead ended up showing how bad Doug himself is at being [[wit]]ty when he doesn't have the opportunity to use his running gags and drawn out jokes by reviewing ''Junior'', a movie so uneventful that Doug had to devote a large portion of the review to pretending to [[vomit]] for 5 minutes and later doing a completely unrelated dream sequence in which he sings about how [[boring]] the movie is. It is easily the worst Nostalgia Critic review Doug's ever made, being one of the few to actually receive a negative reaction from fans. He then [[Godwin's Law|compared the people who disliked the review to Hitler]] in a [[Downfall]] parody. He also reviewed ''Conan the Barbarian'' that month, probably the most recognizable movie he's reviewed in 2010. One wonders when he'll finally be pushed to the point where he reviews ''Terminator'' out of desperation and triggers the mother of all backlashes.
 
January of 2011 was dedicated to [[Electric Boogaloo|sequels]] starting with ''The Neverending Story III''. Since he has long since stopped giving a fuck, the reviews are, of course, terrible. Keep it up, Doug!
 
==Doug Walker's Voice==
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If there's one thing about Doug that makes him stand out from other [[Video Game Reviewers|internet reviewers]], it's his voice. Doug's voice can best be described as being similar to what the [[Angry German Kid]] would sound like if he were passing a kidney stone while being castrated. The eardrum-shattering noise that comes out of Doug's mouth is so horrifyingly unpleasant that [[some argue|some believe]] he has the most unbearable voice on the internet. Doug, on the other hand, [[masochist|can't seem to get enough of hearing himself]]. About one and a half minutes into every Nostalgia Critic review he starts talking in [[ALL CAPS]] and stays that way for the remainder of the video. He's also been compared to [[Seth MacFarlane]] for his tendency to [[DO NOT WANT|break out into song at inappropriate times.]]
{{quote|It's much funnier when he sounds whiny and pathetic...|Doug Walker, making us all deaf for his own amusement.}}
All the shouting Doug does isn't just unpleasant to hear, it's hurting him too. Doug's screaming has caused him to [[LOLWUT|throw out his voice three times in less than two years since he started reviewing shitty movies.]] He's had to do several reviews completely mute, with the help of things like [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/4548-good-son captions, signs,] and [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses/nostalgia-critic/11343-alone Microsoft Sam] (because it's not like he can just wait to get better, right?) Like Spoony or Sean Fausz and their [[fat|expanding waistlines]], Doug hasn't taken his declining health as a possible reason to change his lifestyle, [[retard|he always comes back shouting as if his throat had never been better]]. Massive [[lulz]] are expected on the day that Doug does permanent damage to his throat and finally realizes that [[obvious|screaming at the top of his lungs for more than 30 minutes straight every week may not have been the best idea.]]
 
==Rivalry With the [[AVGN]]==
[[image:Irapegamer.png|thumb|The [[Irate Gamer]] was [[nerd rage|not pleased]] to hear that he was no longer the AVGN's biggest rival.]]
[[Last Thursday]], Doug posted a special Nostagia Critic video adressed to the [[Angry Video Game Nerd]] telling him that [[lie|his fans were accusing Doug of ripping him off]]. Doug then proceeded to warn that if the Nerd didn't tell his fans to [[STFU]], [[Internet Tough Guy|there was going to be trouble]]. Since none of the AVGN's fans really gave a shit about Doug's crappy videos, it can be assumed that [[irony|Doug's fans spammed James Rolfe with so many links to the video and messages like "UR GOING DOWN!"]] that he gave in and responded to the video. But instead of telling the Critic to fuck off, he said that Doug was a [[pretty cool guy]]. Doug managed to keep the feud alive by spewing out paranoid [[bullshit]] and luckily for him, James decided to play along. A series of Critic vs Nerd videos were made, ultimately leading up to a final confrontation in the TGWTG 1-year anniversary video. The video itself was probably [[the best]] thing Doug has ever appeared in, mainly because when you have an actor as terrible as him, even someone like [[Uwe Boll|James Rolfe's]] acting/directing will look amazing in comparison. The battle ended when That Guy with the Glasses (the character), came out of nowhere and told them that their fighting is pointless and that they should stop. They then proceeded to review some boring [[Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles]] movie and the feud ended. For James, at least. The rivalry seems to be alive and well in the Nostalgia Critic's videos, most likely to get his fans excited about the possibility of another Critic vs. Nerd video [[truth|that will never be made]]. [[noone|For those wondering]], James hasn't done anything other than shitty  2-second cameos in Doug's videos since then. Even in his 2-year anniversary video, James only appeared to explain a [[boring|board game]] that nobody has played in decades. As for the fans, well there wasn't really any conflict between them to begin with. Many of the Nerd's fans became fans of Doug and the two fanbases have largely [[sex|become one]].
 
 
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'''[[TL;DR|TL;DR: IT WAS ALL AN ACT THAT WOULD LET DOUG LEECH OFF OF THE NERD'S POPULARITY]]'''
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==Doug Walker vs. Encylopedia Dramatica==
[[Image:Nostalgia_Critic_BAWW.png|thumb|left|We love you, too, Doug.]]
[[File:TGWTG Forums Fans.jpg|thumb|right|A re-enactment of the ED thread on the TGWTG forums.]]
 
In the Nostalgia Critic's [[Shit nobody cares about|review of A Troll In Central Park]] he makes a comment in an [[BAWW|attempt to retaliate]] against the [[Truth|claims of unfunniness]] made against him by [[ED]]. His faggot fanboys [[BJ|agreed with him in the comment section]] calling all ED users "big mean doodie poo poo heads." <s>A dramatican late to the party linked to this article and said "[[NO U]]."</s> Apparently admins are butthurt too because they baleeted it, but that [[Chris-chan|zany character]] is going to [[Forced Meme|keep reposting it]] until [[B&]] or they stop [[Delete fucking everything|deleting]] it.  [[NO|Will lulz ensue?]]
 
But it's not just Douglas whose upset with us at ED,  [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=7822 Their viewers are also distraught at our descriptions of their graven idols].
 
{{quote|Something that amuses me about the TGWTG page - the immense amount of butthurt over a joke in A Troll In Central Park. The joke was included in a gigantic wall of text that was on the screen for maybe a second, yet they're whining like babies. I always have to laugh at how defensive people on ED get over jabs at ED. It's surprising how fragile the feelings are on a site that's like 90% goatse.|[[Retard|Rebochan]],  Live from Mirror-World,  first left from Irony-Ville.<br>Also, it's closer to 98%. Get it right, retard.}}
 
{{clear}}
 
=="The Room" Review==
[[image:Tommyfairusetgwtg.jpg|thumb|right|Tommy Wisau's reaction to Doug's [[rage]].]]
[[image:Rizzo_tweets.png|thumb|left|Fucking [[hypocrites]].]]
Sometime on a Tuesday in July, the [[Channel Awesome|Lultastic Avenger]] strikes again. A while ago, maybe on a Sunday, the Nostalgia Critic's [[fail|award-winning masterpiece]] review of [[Shit nobody cares about|The Room]] was taken down from the site due to threats of a lawsuit from [[fag|John from TheRoomMovie.com]] due to copyright infringement. In [[BAWW|retaliation]], the Doug's [[Shit nobody cares about|latest masterpiece]] has him pretending to be [[Chris-chan|Tommy Wiseau]], some French faggot who directed [[Shit nobody cares about|The Room]]. He [[BAWW|totally supports his innocence]] by trying to be lulzy ala blasting Wiseau and John, and ultimately proves to be as funny as [[Fag|Carlos Mencia]]. Upon hearing their mighty hero's ego wounded and eager to suck cock, the [[fantard|fanboys]] were called to battle, <s>brandishing the Internets to battle the evildoers who wronged [[Jesus|Their Lord]] by writing [[BAWW|angry letters]]</s> Apparently, the email link was taken down on the site because of the mass flood of butthurt from [[Carlos Mencia|The Nostalgia Critic's]] fanboys. But alas, [[Shit nobody cares about|nobody gave a flying fuck.]] The butthurt [[fantard|fantards]] also tried to write about this event on Wikipedia, but their stories have been removed by the admins. [[BAWW|CRY SUMMOAR.]] What should be noted is that TGWTG's founder, Mike Michaud, never said anything to Doug about how [[butthurt|butthurt]] he is coming off as, nor did he tell his chosen [[manchild]] that he could potentially [[an hero|kill Channel Awesome]].
 
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==Doug Fails Miserably at Let's Play==
 
On Tuesday, September 6th, Doug Walker posted a video titled "Let's Play Bart's Nightmare".  It went like this.
 
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If you feel your senses struggling to self-terminate, that's good.  It means you're a human being with a shred of taste.  The video received the lowest possible rating on thatguywiththeglasses.com, which is to say a 3.5 out of 5.  It wasn't long before [[Retsupurae]] got their hands on it and bravely decided to watch the ''entire'' video and record their reactions.
 
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http://blip.tv/slowbeef/retsupurae-vs-the-nostalgia-critic-5535142
 
As expected, their honest commentary on exactly what makes Doug terrible and unfunny was met by anger and outrage by Nostalgia Critic's drooling mongoloid fanbase.
 
The backlash eventually became so great that Doug "apologized" by making a review of some shitty movie based on some shitty book or something. This could have been acceptable as an "apology" by TGWTG fans if Doug had not again labelled his critics as whiny retards. Whether Doug had refused to admit his fuckups as a result of a slip of well-hidden cutzpah or just blatant stupidity is unsure, but the former is highly unlikely.
 
Ladies and gents, we give you; the brill comments concerning the worst 'Let's Play' ever made:
 
<center>{{morphquote|mqtest3|background-color:white;|font-weight: bold;|I like the part where he swore and screamed. Contextless profanity is a cornerstone of decent comedy. Truly this man is a witty comedic genius.|Are you daring to question the Critic's genius with sarcasm? '''STONE HIM'''|This was brutally unfunny and boring.|'''STONE HIM TOO'''|I love how so many people are saying that this video isn't that bad, and yet the person who uploaded this disabled the ratings system.|Criticism? What's that?|'People like to see me get tortured' - So before you bitch about this, remember this, it was YOU lol'd the first time and video game reviews was on demand since then. Basically, YOU asked for this and now you bitch about it. So yeah think about that.|
Yeah! It's all '''OUR''' fault Doug made a horrible Let's Pla- wait.|People need to get a life if they take this too seriously. Honestly. Go outside and get some fresh air. It's immature, unreasonable, stupid, idiotic, dimwitted, etc to lash out and troll and saying he's a terrible person aghagjahgjhag are really low. Seriously. I don't get it. He made a bad video. You have every right to like it or not, but there's a difference between disliking and trolling. Everyone takes these things way too seriously when they shouldn't. If you do, get a life. That's all..|Also don't like it don't watch it yada yada.|"Stop complaining and don't watch if you don't like it u sad people." Um... The Nostalgia Critic gets paid to watch movies that he doesn't like and then complain about them. He even goes looking for shitty movies. So why can't NC fans complain about a video they were expecting to be good?|Surprisingly, the fanboys didn't respond to this gem.|I really dont see why people dont like this, this was the funniest thing I ever seen. I was literally ROTFL.|Now where's that pesky brain of mine I keep losing over and over?|Not. A big. Fucking. DEAL. I mean, Doug's made mediocre videos before, he's allowed to have an off week, on account of his frequent genius.|Too bad this is his day job dipshit, so he's automatically obliged to put some effort in his videos with his non-existent ''frequent genius''. }}</center>
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==External Links==
* [http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/videolinks/thatguywiththeglasses All of Doug's work]
* [http://www.thatguywiththeglasses.com/forums/ TGWTG forum]
* [http://thebusystreet.com/ Some guys who hate Doug even more than we do]
* [http://i.imgur.com/NjNZ3.png Nightmare fuel for the next week]
 
==See Also==
* [[That Guy With The Glasses]] &ndash; The website, not the character or the guy this article is about
* [[The Spoony Experiment]] &ndash; Basically Doug with a few extra braincells and bipolar disorder
* [[Linkara]] &ndash; Frequently cameos in Nostalgia Critic reviews
* [[Angry Video Game Nerd]]
* [[Fair use]] &ndash; Something Doug doesn't understand
* [[Manchild]]
* [[Lolcow]]
[[Category:People]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]
[[Category:YouTube]]

Revision as of 22:25, 2 June 2012