https://edramatica.com/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=SwitchiedaggerSwitchiedagger - Revision history2026-05-17T08:45:29ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.44.2https://edramatica.com/index.php?title=Switchiedagger&diff=163807&oldid=previmported>Oddguy: /* Gallery */2015-05-24T11:29:35Z<p><span class="autocomment">Gallery</span></p>
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</table>imported>Oddguyhttps://edramatica.com/index.php?title=Switchiedagger&diff=163804&oldid=previmported>Oddguy: /* Gallery */2015-05-24T11:29:35Z<p><span class="autocomment">Gallery</span></p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>[[Image:Switchie_food.jpg|thumb|220px|also [[noone|cocks]]]]<br />
'''Switchiedagger''' is the name given to a 27 year old flumpback whale found along the Corpus Christi shoreline. She was adopted by her two [[lie|loving]] parents, who U-Hauled her back to San Antonio, and converted her to [[Catholic|Catholicism]]. Her hobbies include smoking Camel fats and licking Jack in the Box greasetraps. When she's not on a scale-smashing rampage, she can be found on [[YouTube]] crying about [[Megan Meier]]'s heroic last stand.<br />
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== I don't liiiike the foods but the foods liiike me ==<br />
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{{quote|...I ate a lot of fruits and vegetables which I didn't purge tonight, but I did purge a meal I had at Jack in the Box. Only part of it came out. (the Box part)|Switchiedagger bragging about her improperly executed [[eating disorder]]}}<br />
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{{quote|So I think my fatass broke the goddamn [sic] scale.|Switchiedagger reflecting on previous experiences of abusing [[the internet|electronics]]}}<br />
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<i><b>"I want to do something before it eats up my entire life."</b></i><br />
In Soviet Russia, food eats fatty!<br />
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Unbeknownst to Switchie, her eating habits are actually life saving. To delay imminent [[An Hero|suicide]], her psychiatrist secretly replaces the cream in her Twinkies with bottles of Klonopin.<br />
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== Boundless Failure ==<br />
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{{quote|You fucked Ken to spite your mom and become a cockhound.|Switchie's best friend, Yor mom.}}<br />
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Switchiedagger is a dreaded [[Loser|boomerang child]]. So far, on every attempt to move out, she [[fellatio|blew]] her rent money on crates of Honey Buns and the occasional scalpel, prompting many to wonder, "Why not just [[Emo|slice your fucking wrists open and bleed to death, you hideous blob]]?" <br />
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Curiously enough, she remains openly proud of the fact that splitting a dumpy apartment in the middle of [[Niggers|the ghetto]] and working at Home Depot was the "pinnacle of [her] success."<br />
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Switchie often boasts about her immense intelligence despite overlooking obvious hypocracies such as being a Catholic Tarot card reader.<br />
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<i><b>"Doors of opportunity will open up for me."</b></i> ...too bad you can't fit through them.<br />
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<center><big>'''Where it Started : Responding to the [[Megan Had It Coming|The Megan Had it Coming Blog]]'''</big></center><br />
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<center><youtube>IMyBo-y65FI</youtube></center><br />
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{{quote|I'm trying really hard not to say the obvious|[[Switchiedagger]]}}<br />
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==Gallery==<br />
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<gallery><br />
Image:Switchie_fursona.jpg|Switchiedagger's [[fursona]]<br />
Image:Switchie_finger.jpg|Switchie was desperate enough to invite the entire world for a quick shag. They all said no.<br />
Image:Switchie_lazors.jpg|The [[cancer]] that killed /b/<br />
Image:Switchie_thiiisbig.jpg|"My ass is thiiiiiis big"<br />
</gallery><br />
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== External Links ==<br />
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[http://www.xanga.com/switchiedagger Xanga] (A string of love notes to her imaginary friend Ashley)<br><br />
[http://www.youtube.com/user/switchiedagger Youtube] - videos removed :( <br><br />
[http://www.okcupid.com/profile?u=switchiedagger Failed internet dating ploy]<br><br />
[http://myspace.com/switchiedagger MySpace]-Deleted :[<br><br />
{{YoutubeSeries}}<br />
[[Category:People]]</div>imported>Oddguy