imported>Failman2 at 07:41, 22 January 2022

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	{{Timeline\|Featured article November 6 & November 7, [[2013]]\|[[PayPal]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[Lee Rigby]]}}		{{Timeline\|Featured article November 6 & November 7, [[2013]]\|[[PayPal]]\|{{PAGENAME}}\|[[Lee Rigby]]}}

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2015-05-26T13:54:10Z

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New page

[[Image:Sad-man-and-rain-1330349202VkV.jpg|thumb|Why me? Why am ''I'' so cursed?]]
'''Seasonal Affective Disorder''', often abbreviated as [[Bawww|W.A.H.]], is a made up disease. Sufferers of this terrible affliction like to think that they're in some way out of the ordinary and deserve special attention, when in fact the only thing wrong with them is a severe case of [[USI]].

W.A.H. is related to [[fibromyalgia]] and [[laziness|chronic fatigue syndrome]], in that they're all imaginary diseases used by crybabies to avoid responsibility. [[Basement dwellers]] are immune to W.A.H. as basements are impervious to the vagaries of weather.
__NOTOC__

==Symptoms and Treatment==
Do you prefer summer to winter? Congratulations! [[A winner is you|You are diseased]]. You deserve special attention. Seasonal Affective Disorder is said to be caused by a lack of [[Drugs|Vitamin D]], which the sun is used to make within the body. This is an utterly false claim, as the internet proves. If a lack of sunlight made you [[emo|depressed]], the internet would be full of [[b/|sullen, hateful people]] displaying a lack of motivation and energy. Happily, S.A.D. is complete shit, because <i>that</i> internet would suck ass.

It is doubtful that many practitioners actually believe S.A.D. exists, because the primary treatment is the [[How About A Nice Big Cup Of Shut The Fuck Up|“take-this-and-shut-the-fuck-up”]] SSRI's, which fix S.A.D. as well as they do depression and other fake diseases. The medication [[Goggles|does not treat]] a paucity of sunlight, as the lack of a [[depression|Prozac]] pipeline to Alaska proves, but it does tend to keep housewives from mouthing off and aspiring to be other than [[Women's rights|sandwich-making sex workers]], as God intended.

===An Objective Comparison of SAD and Closeted Homosexuality===
The symptoms of S.A.D. include [[Fatass|craving of carbohydrates]], [[Asexual|decreased sex drive]], and withdraw from spouse. Closet faggots spend their time [[NORP|avoiding having sex with their wives]] to [[Buttsecks|pack fudge into their various orifices]]. Both are prone to suicide. S.A.D. sufferers avoid venturing into the sun, and homos in denial spend all of their time in dark alleys or strange basements. Both will [[Pro-ana|starve themselves]] due to poor self image, and lose large amounts of weight. Ergo, all S.A.D. sufferers are closeted faggots and should an hero ASAP.
[[File:Light Box Therepy.jpg|thumb|200px|right|Apparently, inducing blindness is a cure for feeling sad during winter.]]
==Cure==
Turn on the lights. Seriously, this "disease" can be cured by walking over to the wall and [[Camwhore|flicking the switch]]. Some sufferers claim that they need special light bulbs to feel better, but they are just trying to scam their insurance into buying them [[Bling bling|special light bulbs]] that cost a shit ton of money. Most healthcare providers are [[419 Nigerian Email Scams|falling for it]], because these light bulbs are covered as treatment for S.A.D. If you file to get one and it works for you, try to get [[hookers and blow|a bouncy house]] next. It's bound to make you happier than fancy lightbulbs. And assuming it's not semen encrusted like [[Fleshlight|everything else you own]], it will last longer, too.

==Known Sufferers==
Every human being that's ever lived, ever. But don't let that stop you from making a [[youtube]] channel that chronicles your struggle. Why not call in sick for work and tell your boss that you wish it was sunnier outside?

==Gallery==
<center><gallery>
File:Seasonal Affective Disorder4.jpg|Animals are also affected.
File:Seasonal Affective Disorder3.jpg
File:Seasonal Affective Disorder2.jpg|Kill yourself.
File:Seasonal Affective Disorder1.jpg
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
*[[Fibromyalgia]]
*[[ADHD]]
*[[Victim Complex]]
{{Psychology}}
[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]
[[Category:Disease]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]
{{Timeline|Featured article November 6 & November 7, [[2013]]|[[PayPal]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Lee Rigby]]}}

Seasonal Affective Disorder - Revision history

imported>Failman2 at 07:41, 22 January 2022

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