imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

2012-02-18T07:09:56Z

don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

← Older revision	Revision as of 07:09, 18 February 2012
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imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

2012-02-18T07:09:56Z

don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

← Older revision	Revision as of 07:09, 18 February 2012
(No difference)

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

2012-02-18T07:09:56Z

don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

← Older revision	Revision as of 07:09, 18 February 2012
(No difference)

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

2012-02-18T07:09:56Z

don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

New page

[[Image:Oh_Gnome_you_feel_so_good.jpg|thumb|Paulus’ only [[IRL]] activity.]]
Paulus_thee_wood_gnome is undoubtly one of the most notorious [[attention whores]] on the [[IMDb]] [[shit]] hole that is [[The Soapbox]]. According to boards.com, Paulus contributes to 45 percent of all posts and 55 percent of all threads made on [[The Soapbox]].

His threads are known to generate an obscene number of replies, not because of their interesting nature, but because Paulus happens to also be a [[troll]] king. Any staggering thread is immediately bumped by one of his many [[sock]]s. According to actwon [http://www.actwon.com/imdb], at last count, Paulus had created over 200 [[sock]]s, all of which are just as annoying, if not more so than his main account.

As if that didn’t occupy all of his non-[[masturbating]] time, his latest creation, another [[messageboard]] called “The Playhouse” is yet another [[internets]] whoring scheme to make people like him. Much like Pee Wee’s Playhouse, Paulus’ “Playhouse” is a trap for innocent and unsuspecting [[internets]] dwellers. It’s customary to find threads about [[fucking]] wild horses and making sacrificial voodoo dolls.

== Life Goals ==
Born Paul Littlefoot, paulus_the_wood_gnome was found on the outskirts of a Middlesbrough landfill in 1987 by Tom and Wendy Littlefeet. Obviously abandoned because of his off-putting looks (still very much apparent today), Paulus made it his life ambition to brown nose his way into the hearts of gullible [[men]] and [[women]] across the world. With the help of [[The Soapbox]], he is accomplishing that dream, one [[idiot]] at a time.

The woodgnome has also been known to talk incessantly about his future plans to become a teacher. Based on his A level test scores, it’s safe to say that those [[dreams]] will never be realized. The only thing he’ll be teaching is how not to get into [[University]], something he accomplished only by brown nosing and performing [[sex]]ual acts on the dean of the [[University]] of [[Sunderland]].

== Sex ==

Though his appearance confuses the general public in terms discerning his gender, Paul Littlefoot is in fact a ‘[[male]]'. His pictures have been known to send people into convulsions, leading to several charges of aggravated assault being brought against him. His [[IMDb]] profile is clearly marked up with warnings to prevent unknowing [[Soapboxer]]s from falling victim to viewing his pictures.

Even more repulsive in real life, Paul has had much difficulty attaining and retaining partners. His first courtship ended after three years when his girlfriend left him for what can only be described as a missing link, making Paulus obviously even more repulsive than the missing link.

It’s been rumored that Paul pays his current girlfriend to stay with him though they’re both allowed to [[date]] other [[men]] at the same time. Beggars can’t be choosers. According to documents by his current [[girlfriend]], attained by one [[Soapboxer]], Paul must paper bag himself before all sexual acts.

Paul was so bad at [[teh]] [[secks]] that he turned [[saucer_magnolia]] into a raging [[attention whore]] [[slut]].

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Paulus - Revision history

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.

imported>Mike the Great: don't redirect articles if they suck. Try... uhhh... improving them.