Etsy - Revision history

imported>ElSegCunt: /* Etsy Patrons */

2019-02-16T12:49:39Z

Etsy Patrons

← Older revision		Revision as of 12:49, 16 February 2019
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	==Etsy's Art==		==Etsy's Art==
	The ~~horrors~~ found within Etsy can easily ~~be broken down into~~ five categories. The artists who specialize in each category are generally vapid fuckwits who can't make money selling their goods at the local [[hippie\|farmer's market]].		The atrocities found within Etsy can be easily relegated to five categories. The artists who specialize in each category are generally vapid fuckwits who can't make money selling their goods at the local [[hippie\|farmer's market]].

	'''Hipster Art'''- [[Hipster]] art usually consists of a [[tracing\|traced]] or [[nigga stole my bike\|printed-out image]] pasted onto a 30-cent, plastic piece of ~~jewelery~~. Uncreative and untalented, the 'artists' who manufacture this shit get away with stealing others' art by finding old, public-domain images and transferring them onto other ~~mediums~~. Many hipster artists use the same images for [[tracing\|'inspiration']], which means that 90% of Etsy's hipster art looks EXACTLY the same. The ~~jewelery~~ and prints they make are lapped up by gullible [[16 year old girls]] and [[Portland\|gigantic artfaggots]] who are too lazy or ~~too~~ stupid to find the images their favorite artists rip off of online and use them themselves.		'''Hipster Art'''- [[Hipster]] art usually consists of a [[tracing\|traced]] or [[nigga stole my bike\|printed-out image]], often a single word or stupid phrase, pasted onto a 30-cent, plastic piece of jewelry like a ringpop. Uncreative and untalented, the 'artists' who manufacture this shit get away with stealing others' art by finding old, public-domain images and transferring them onto other media. Many hipster artists use the same images for [[tracing\|'inspiration']], which means that 90% of Etsy's hipster art looks EXACTLY the same. The jewelry and prints they make are lapped up by gullible [[16 year old girls]] and [[Portland\|gigantic artfaggots]] who are too lazy or stupid to find the images their favorite artists rip off of online and use them themselves.
	[[Image:SteampunkUSI.jpg\|left\|thumb\|[[yes\|The most expensive USB drive ever?]]]]		[[Image:SteampunkUSI.jpg\|left\|thumb\|[[yes\|The most expensive USB drive ever?]]]]
	'''Steampunk Art'''- The [[Steampunk]] ~~sensation~~ has infested Etsy, and a massive chunk of Etsy's products are [[trying too hard\|Steampunk themed]]. For a ~~[[lie\|modest]] few hundred dollars~~, you may be able to purchase an everyday object with gears ~~fastened~~ onto it! Steampunk artists know that their fanbase is [[batshit insane]] and will pay top price for anything adorned with brass. They are probably the most intelligent of Etsy's artists, as they have cornered a [[obsessed\|ravenous]] market that will eat up their mind-feces, no matter how low-quality it is.		'''Steampunk Art'''- The [[Steampunk]] cancer has infested Etsy, and a massive chunk of Etsy's products are [[trying too hard\|Steampunk themed]]. For a mere month's rent, you may be able to purchase an everyday object with gears hot glued onto it! Steampunk artists know that their fanbase is [[batshit insane]] and will pay top price for anything adorned with brass. They are probably the most intelligent of Etsy's artists, as they have cornered a [[obsessed\|ravenous]] market that will eat up their mind-feces, no matter how low-quality it is.

	'''Pagan Art''' - [[Pagan]]s (particularly the batshit insane feminist variety who call themselves "[[cunt\|wombn]]" and wax lyrical about [[menstruation\|blood mysteries]]) have made their way ~~into~~ Etsy, and with them has come their wide array of [[magick\|~~psuedo~~-mystical]] crap. Instead of vomiting their ugly crafts onto the pagan-specific [[~~cunt~~\|netherregions]] of the interweb, they have decided to introduce their [[~~fake~~\|magickal]] relics to a [[hipsters\|wider audience]]. Pagan artists create their goods by foraging around their backyards (or the local park, since most of them [[welfare whale\|can't afford land]]), picking up sticks and rocks, and gluing them onto necklaces or making them into [[dildos\|'wands']].		'''Pagan Art''' - [[Pagan]]s (particularly the batshit insane feminist variety who call themselves "[[cunt\|wombn]]" and wax lyrical about [[menstruation\|blood mysteries]]) have made their way onto Etsy, and with them has come their wide array of [[magick\|pseudo-mystical]] crap. Instead of vomiting their ugly crafts onto the pagan-specific [[taint\|netherregions]] of the interweb, they have decided to introduce their [[It's a Fake\|magickal]] relics to a [[hipsters\|wider audience]]. Pagan artists create their goods by foraging around their backyards (or the local park, since most of them [[welfare whale\|can't afford land]]), picking up sticks, feathers and rocks, and gluing them onto necklaces or making them into [[dildos\|'wands']].

	'''Traditional Crafts'''- The [[old people\|traditional craftsmen]] on Etsy have mastered obscure niche trades such as [[WoW\|leatherworking]] and have resorted to selling their finished products online. While these individuals may actually be talented, they are just as worthless as the rest of the artists for siphoning their [[talent]] into a trade that nobody actually cares about anymore. Their goods are often bought by old people (taxidermy reminds me of grandpa!) or [[indie]] kids who want to look [[old\|sophisticated]]. While their products may actually be high-quality and [[beautiful]], it's much more convenient and less expensive to simply buy something that is [[Walmart\|mass produced]].		'''Traditional Crafts'''- The [[old people\|traditional craftsmen]] on Etsy have mastered obscure niche trades such as [[WoW\|leatherworking]] and have resorted to selling their finished products online. While these individuals may actually be talented, they are just as worthless as the rest of the artists for siphoning their [[talent]] into a trade that nobody actually cares about anymore. Their goods are often bought by old people (taxidermy reminds me of grandpa!) or [[indie]] kids who want to look [[old\|sophisticated]]. While their products may actually be high-quality and [[beautiful]], it's much more convenient and less expensive to simply buy something that is [[Walmart\|mass produced]].

	'''Insane Art'''- [[yes\|Do you think that the hide of your dead cat is sellable art? Do you like to paint pictures with your ~~vagina~~?]] If so, then you may just have an ~~account~~ on Etsy. Some people in this world are ~~irreparably~~ [[crazy]], and many of them like to sell a bit of their crazy on Etsy. [[~~loser~~\|If you are browsing Etsy]] and you come across something that is [[Vagina Bike\|mind-bogglingly strange]], you may have come across a piece of insane art. Nobody knows if anybody actually buys some of the stranger items because anybody who did would probably [[basement dweller\|keep to himself]].		'''Insane Art'''- [[yes\|Do you think that the hide of your dead cat is sellable art? Do you like to paint pictures with your vulva?]] If so, then you may just have an store on Etsy. Some people in this world are irredeemably [[crazy]], and many of them like to [[Capitalism\|sell a bit of their crazy]] on Etsy. [[Cunt\|If you are browsing Etsy]] and you come across something that is [[Vagina Bike\|mind-bogglingly strange]], you may have come across a piece of insane art. Nobody knows if anybody actually buys some of the stranger items because anybody who did would probably [[basement dweller\|keep to himself]].

	==Etsy Patrons==		==Etsy Patrons==
	Even worse than Etsy's sellers are the people who buy the horseshit. The average Etsy patron is an [[art school]] reject who doesn't have the talent to make [[woman\|his]] or her own accessories. Most of these ~~talentless~~ hacks are still dependent upon their parents' money and fuel their expensive addiction to bad art with their poor elders' retirement money. Most Etsy fans have little to no fashion sense and believe that loading up their [[pro-ana\|shriveled]] bodies with fake vintage accessories is ~~just as effective as~~ planning out an attractive outfit. You can detect an Etsy patron by the toxic fumes of [[USI\|pretentiousness]] it gives off.		Even worse than Etsy's sellers are the people who buy the horseshit. The average Etsy patron is an [[art school]] reject who doesn't have the talent to make [[woman\|his]] or her own accessories. Most of these hacks are still dependent upon their parents' money and fuel their expensive addiction to bad art with their poor elders' retirement money. Most Etsy fans have little to no fashion sense and believe that loading up their [[pro-ana\|shriveled]] bodies with fake vintage accessories is tantamount to planning out an attractive outfit. You can detect an Etsy patron by the toxic fumes of [[USI\|pretentiousness]] it gives off.
	[[Image:Etsyfan1.jpg\|left\|thumb\|An Etsy lover in its natural state.]]		[[Image:Etsyfan1.jpg\|left\|thumb\|An Etsy lover in its natural state.]]
	[[Image:Etsypendant.jpg\|thumb\|This phallic stick-on-a-rope is just one of the many magikal items one can find on Etsy.]]		[[Image:Etsypendant.jpg\|thumb\|This phallic stick-on-a-rope is just one of the many magikal items one can find on Etsy.]]

imported>Schnookums at 02:42, 8 February 2014

2014-02-08T02:42:27Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 02:42, 8 February 2014
(No difference)

imported>Schnookums at 02:42, 8 February 2014

2014-02-08T02:42:27Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 02:42, 8 February 2014
(No difference)

imported>Schnookums at 02:42, 8 February 2014

2014-02-08T02:42:27Z

← Older revision	Revision as of 02:42, 8 February 2014
(No difference)

imported>Schnookums at 02:42, 8 February 2014

2014-02-08T02:42:27Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 02:42, 8 February 2014
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	[[Image:Etsyfan2.jpg\|thumb\|The average Etsy patron.]]		[[Image:Etsyfan2.jpg\|thumb\|The average Etsy patron.]]
	[[Image:Vulvabutterfly.jpg\|thumb\|For a mere $48, this vaginafly can be yours!]]		[[Image:Vulvabutterfly.jpg\|thumb\|For a mere $48, this vaginafly can be yours!]]
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	*[http://www.etsy.com/ Etsy.com]		*[http://www.etsy.com/ Etsy.com]
	*[http://www.regretsy.com/ Regretsy - Where DIY Meets WTF]		*[http://www.regretsy.com/ Regretsy - Where DIY Meets WTF]
	~~[[Category: Sites\| ]]~~		{{sites}}

imported>TroperFag: /* Etsy's Art */

2011-05-15T03:01:53Z

Etsy's Art

← Older revision		Revision as of 03:01, 15 May 2011
Line 12:		Line 12:
	'''Steampunk Art'''- The [[Steampunk]] sensation has infested Etsy, and a massive chunk of Etsy's products are [[trying too hard\|Steampunk themed]]. For a [[lie\|modest]] few hundred dollars, you may be able to purchase an everyday object with gears fastened onto it! Steampunk artists know that their fanbase is [[batshit insane]] and will pay top price for anything adorned with brass. They are probably the most intelligent of Etsy's artists, as they have cornered a [[obsessed\|ravenous]] market that will eat up their mind-feces, no matter how low-quality it is.		'''Steampunk Art'''- The [[Steampunk]] sensation has infested Etsy, and a massive chunk of Etsy's products are [[trying too hard\|Steampunk themed]]. For a [[lie\|modest]] few hundred dollars, you may be able to purchase an everyday object with gears fastened onto it! Steampunk artists know that their fanbase is [[batshit insane]] and will pay top price for anything adorned with brass. They are probably the most intelligent of Etsy's artists, as they have cornered a [[obsessed\|ravenous]] market that will eat up their mind-feces, no matter how low-quality it is.

	'''Pagan Art'''- ~~Pagans~~ have made their way into Etsy, and with them has come their wide array of [[magick\|psuedo-mystical]] crap. Instead of vomiting their ugly crafts onto the pagan-specific [[cunt\|netherregions]] of the interweb, they have decided to introduce their [[fake\|magickal]] relics to a [[hipsters\|wider audience]]. Pagan artists create their goods by foraging around their backyards (or the local park, since most of them [[welfare whale\|can't afford land]]), picking up sticks and rocks, and gluing them onto necklaces or making them into [[dildos\|'wands']].		'''Pagan Art''' - [[Pagan]]s (particularly the batshit insane feminist variety who call themselves "[[cunt\|wombn]]" and wax lyrical about [[menstruation\|blood mysteries]]) have made their way into Etsy, and with them has come their wide array of [[magick\|psuedo-mystical]] crap. Instead of vomiting their ugly crafts onto the pagan-specific [[cunt\|netherregions]] of the interweb, they have decided to introduce their [[fake\|magickal]] relics to a [[hipsters\|wider audience]]. Pagan artists create their goods by foraging around their backyards (or the local park, since most of them [[welfare whale\|can't afford land]]), picking up sticks and rocks, and gluing them onto necklaces or making them into [[dildos\|'wands']].

	'''Traditional Crafts'''- The [[old people\|traditional craftsmen]] on Etsy have mastered obscure niche trades such as [[WoW\|leatherworking]] and have resorted to selling their finished products online. While these individuals may actually be talented, they are just as worthless as the rest of the artists for siphoning their [[talent]] into a trade that nobody actually cares about anymore. Their goods are often bought by old people (taxidermy reminds me of grandpa!) or [[indie]] kids who want to look [[old\|sophisticated]]. While their products may actually be high-quality and [[beautiful]], it's much more convenient and less expensive to simply buy something that is [[Walmart\|mass produced]].		'''Traditional Crafts'''- The [[old people\|traditional craftsmen]] on Etsy have mastered obscure niche trades such as [[WoW\|leatherworking]] and have resorted to selling their finished products online. While these individuals may actually be talented, they are just as worthless as the rest of the artists for siphoning their [[talent]] into a trade that nobody actually cares about anymore. Their goods are often bought by old people (taxidermy reminds me of grandpa!) or [[indie]] kids who want to look [[old\|sophisticated]]. While their products may actually be high-quality and [[beautiful]], it's much more convenient and less expensive to simply buy something that is [[Walmart\|mass produced]].

imported>Unknown: Created page with " The average Etsy patron. For a mere $48, this vaginafly can be yours! [[Image:Etsyoctopi.jpg|thumb|So many identi..."

2011-04-16T03:23:04Z

Created page with " thumb|The average Etsy patron. thumb|For a mere $48, this vaginafly can be yours! [[Image:Etsyoctopi.jpg|thumb|So many identi..."

New page

[[Image:Etsyfan2.jpg|thumb|The average Etsy patron.]]
[[Image:Vulvabutterfly.jpg|thumb|For a mere $48, this vaginafly can be yours!]]
[[Image:Etsyoctopi.jpg|thumb|So many identical octopus necklaces from so many different artists- [[none|which one to buy?]]]]
'''Etsy''' is a website where [[failure|'indie']] artists sell their [[shit|wares]]. When an artist can't make it in the real world, he or she will turn to this website, whose patrons will gobble up their overpriced wastes of resources because they can't distinguish between real art and [[plastic crap|cheap shit]]. Fans of Etsy praise the artists that use the website for being so [[bullshit|creative and unique]], but a simple visit to the site will show all but the most [[hipster|brainwashed]] of [[retards]] that this praise is unfounded. For every 'original' necklace or sculpture, there is likely to be at least ten other necklaces and sculptures [[art thief|exactly like them]]. With its miles upon miles of copycats, ridiculous levels of [[USI]], eye-melting products, and [[expensive|overpriced]] 'art', Etsy is truly the [[DeviantART]] of the arts and crafts world.

==Etsy's Art==
The horrors found within Etsy can easily be broken down into five categories. The artists who specialize in each category are generally vapid fuckwits who can't make money selling their goods at the local [[hippie|farmer's market]].

'''Hipster Art'''- [[Hipster]] art usually consists of a [[tracing|traced]] or [[nigga stole my bike|printed-out image]] pasted onto a 30-cent, plastic piece of jewelery. Uncreative and untalented, the 'artists' who manufacture this shit get away with stealing others' art by finding old, public-domain images and transferring them onto other mediums. Many hipster artists use the same images for [[tracing|'inspiration']], which means that 90% of Etsy's hipster art looks EXACTLY the same. The jewelery and prints they make are lapped up by gullible [[16 year old girls]] and [[Portland|gigantic artfaggots]] who are too lazy or too stupid to find the images their favorite artists rip off of online and use them themselves.
[[Image:SteampunkUSI.jpg|left|thumb|[[yes|The most expensive USB drive ever?]]]]
'''Steampunk Art'''- The [[Steampunk]] sensation has infested Etsy, and a massive chunk of Etsy's products are [[trying too hard|Steampunk themed]]. For a [[lie|modest]] few hundred dollars, you may be able to purchase an everyday object with gears fastened onto it! Steampunk artists know that their fanbase is [[batshit insane]] and will pay top price for anything adorned with brass. They are probably the most intelligent of Etsy's artists, as they have cornered a [[obsessed|ravenous]] market that will eat up their mind-feces, no matter how low-quality it is.

'''Pagan Art'''- Pagans have made their way into Etsy, and with them has come their wide array of [[magick|psuedo-mystical]] crap. Instead of vomiting their ugly crafts onto the pagan-specific [[cunt|netherregions]] of the interweb, they have decided to introduce their [[fake|magickal]] relics to a [[hipsters|wider audience]]. Pagan artists create their goods by foraging around their backyards (or the local park, since most of them [[welfare whale|can't afford land]]), picking up sticks and rocks, and gluing them onto necklaces or making them into [[dildos|'wands']].

'''Traditional Crafts'''- The [[old people|traditional craftsmen]] on Etsy have mastered obscure niche trades such as [[WoW|leatherworking]] and have resorted to selling their finished products online. While these individuals may actually be talented, they are just as worthless as the rest of the artists for siphoning their [[talent]] into a trade that nobody actually cares about anymore. Their goods are often bought by old people (taxidermy reminds me of grandpa!) or [[indie]] kids who want to look [[old|sophisticated]]. While their products may actually be high-quality and [[beautiful]], it's much more convenient and less expensive to simply buy something that is [[Walmart|mass produced]].

'''Insane Art'''- [[yes|Do you think that the hide of your dead cat is sellable art? Do you like to paint pictures with your vagina?]] If so, then you may just have an account on Etsy. Some people in this world are irreparably [[crazy]], and many of them like to sell a bit of their crazy on Etsy. [[loser|If you are browsing Etsy]] and you come across something that is [[Vagina Bike|mind-bogglingly strange]], you may have come across a piece of insane art. Nobody knows if anybody actually buys some of the stranger items because anybody who did would probably [[basement dweller|keep to himself]].

==Etsy Patrons==
Even worse than Etsy's sellers are the people who buy the horseshit. The average Etsy patron is an [[art school]] reject who doesn't have the talent to make [[woman|his]] or her own accessories. Most of these talentless hacks are still dependent upon their parents' money and fuel their expensive addiction to bad art with their poor elders' retirement money. Most Etsy fans have little to no fashion sense and believe that loading up their [[pro-ana|shriveled]] bodies with fake vintage accessories is just as effective as planning out an attractive outfit. You can detect an Etsy patron by the toxic fumes of [[USI|pretentiousness]] it gives off.
[[Image:Etsyfan1.jpg|left|thumb|An Etsy lover in its natural state.]]
[[Image:Etsypendant.jpg|thumb|This phallic stick-on-a-rope is just one of the many magikal items one can find on Etsy.]]

==Gallery==

{{cg|THE PRODUCTS OF ETSY|etsy|center|<gallery>
Image:Etsy1.jpg|LOL SO INDIE
Image:Etsy2.jpg|Buying overpriced art is just as easy on Etsy as it is on DeviantART.
Image:Etsy3.jpg|Steampunk and Hipster [[lame|trends]] collide.
Image:Etsy4.jpg|Sometimes artists cross subcultures, as can be seen by this [[stupid|steampunk fairy wand]].
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:Etsy5.jpg|Wot
Image:Etsy6.jpg|A perfect addition to any child's doll collection.
Image:Etsy7.jpg|[[lie|The price reflects the effort]].
Image:Etsy8.jpg|I found it on my front lawn and sold it on Etsy.
Image:Etsy9.jpg|[[emo|CUT MY WRISTS AND BACK MY EYESSSS]]
</gallery>|}}
==See Also==
*[[Hipster]]
*[[Steampunk]]
*[[Fashion]]
*[[Indie]]
*[[Plastic Crap]]
*[[Art School]]
*[[Art]]
*[[Bellaboo]]
{{clear}}
==Links==
*[http://www.etsy.com/ Etsy.com]
*[http://www.regretsy.com/ Regretsy - Where DIY Meets WTF]
[[Category: Sites| ]]