View source for Swap.avi

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'''SWAP.avi''' is the most horrible thing ever produced by [[teh internets]]. This movie involves so much fecal matter, it transcends the genre of scat porn. SRSLY, it's pretty awful. [[You]] will be tempted to try and find this movie. DO NOT! You must resist the urge to ever view this movie. It has brought grown men to tears and is partly responsible for famine in [[Africa]] and the [[Holocaust]], not to mention the crucifixion of [[Jesus Christ]]. 

The abomination that is SWAP.avi was the brainchild of one [[SomethingAwful]] goon called Metis. Unfortunately, unlike most children conceived over the SA forums, Metis's was not [[abortion|aborted]]. It was allowed to grow under the watchful eye of a [[Brazil|Brazilian]] company that makes custom porn movies, the same studio behind [[2girls1cup|2 Girls 1 Cup]], and The Passion of the Christ.

Once the terror had grown to full size it was unleashed onto the [[internet]] to rape and pillage, leaving behind a horrible stench wherever it went.

SWAP.avi is a good example of endgame, meaning it is officially the worst thing to ever be created and posted on the [[internets]] and, thanks in part to the advanced calculations of [[Stephen Hawking]]'s wheelchair, it can be said with complete metaphysical certitude that nothing could ever exceed it in terribleness.
==The Pitch==

[[Image:turd.gif|thumb|200px|The lead actor of SWAP.avi]]

In summary--and this is not an Aristocrats joke--Metis wanted the following:

{{quote|"'I've read the rules for requesting a movie to be made, and it said that if I have a fetish that is different from what is offered, you may be able to talk to the directors and work something out. I got a great idea while watching some scat movies recently: scat swapping. This would basically be a movie where one woman's ass is penetrated by fingering and tonguing and fisting to make her anus very loose. A third woman will pull her anus open further and hold it open, meanwhile the second woman, the scat-giver, shits in the first woman's open ass. The woman whose ass has been shit in will then shit the scat-giver's shit back out, and everyone will eat it. If possible, I would also like it if the women were able to vomit in the woman's ass along with the shit, or afterwards, so that the vomit could also be shit out and eaten. Please get back to me and let me know if this is something you can accomplish in a video, and if so, how much it would cost. Thank you!'"|Metis}}
===Where Metis got his idea ...( SATAN)===
{{frame|<youtube>KQoJo81lujk</youtube>|margin=auto|border=#A34719|background=#CC7A00}}

==What you should NEVAR DO==
*Watch SWAP.avi
*Read the [[SomethingAwful]] [http://www.somethingawful.com/d/horrors-of-porn/horrible-saga-swapavi.php?page=4 review play-by-play]
*Download SWAP.avi
*Think about SWAP.avi for <s>too</s> a lonnng time. 
*[[Sick Fuck|Fap]] to SWAP.avi.

==What you should ALWAYS DO==
*Replace your parents' wedding video with SWAP.avi
*Hide SWAP.avi in the [[Teletubbies]] video box at the local kindergarten
*[[NSFW|Now Show Friends and Workmates]]
'''Teh hurrurz at RedBox DvD rental outlets:'''

#Download SWAP.avi
#Burn to a DvD.
#Rent a movie from RedBox.
#Switch SWAP.avi with the movie and place into the RedBox DVD case.
#Place in the deposit box.
#????
#PROFIT!

'''Teh hurrurz with friends:'''

#Load SWAP.avi on friend's computer.
#Leave video paused at the beginning.
#Write a note reading "Watch this plz!"
#Leave room.
#????
#PROFIT!

==Did yee knar?==
* Only two people were known to finish the entire movie: Zack Parsons at SomethingAwful.com, and its creator, Metis. This rumor has recently been laid to rest, however, as footage of a couple of teenagers watching the entire thing has just surfaced on the Youtube. 
{{frame|<youtube>o7PjFHPdSvE</youtube>|margin=auto|border=#A34719|background=#CC7A00}}
*The creators of SWAP.avi had to import shit from other countries.
*SWAP.avi is more powerful than [[Pain Series]], cannot be un-seen, and is arguably one of the only things on the [[internets]] that really does ''not'' need any moar pooper.  
*Metis is either a [[sick fuck]] or a [[sick fuck|gifted and incredibly astute social commentator]].
*93% of men would [[fap]] to SWAP.avi; the remaining 7% are [[gay]].
*Desumilk from [[Paheal]] is the only known female to watch swap.avi entirely for the lulz.
*SWAP.avi is educational and it is going to be shown in elementray schools all around the world to explain how [[shit]] is fun.

==The story in pictures==
<gallery mode="slideshow">
Image:mfxvideo.png|<big>'''Get your own custom porn made by these guys!'''</big>
Image:Scatswapping.png|<big>'''[[engrish|WUT???]]'''</big>
Image:swapstarring2.png|<big>'''The human value of everyone in this image is just under $300.'''</big>
Image:Swapavistarring.png|<big>'''That's as far as you go soldier!'''</big>
Image:Swap3.jpg|<big>'''PHASE 1'''</big>
Image:Swap4.jpg|<big>'''PHASE 2'''</big>
Image:Swap5.jpg|<big>'''PHASE 3'''</big>
Image:Swap6.jpg|<big>'''PHASE 4'''</big>
Image:Swap7.jpg|<big>'''????'''</big>
Image:Swap8.jpg|<big>'''PROFIT'''</big>
</gallery>

<center><gallery>
Image:Swap2.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

==Links==
*[http://dk.toastednet.org/swap.avi From ED Member Pi Is A Rational]
*[http://thepiratebay.org/torrent/4333261/swap.avi Torrent copy]
*[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/horrors-of-porn/horrible-saga-swapavi.php The SomethingAwful review] 
*[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0411931/ The German remake of the movie] 
*<s>[http://rapidshare.com/files/286722723/swap.part1.rar Part 1 uploaded in Rapidshit.]</s> '''(dead as of Nov 2014)'''
*<s>[http://rapidshare.com/files/286253418/swap.part2.rar Part 2.]</s> '''(dead as of Nov 2014)'''
*<s>[http://rapidshare.com/files/286377894/swap.part3.rar Part 3.]</s> '''(dead as of Nov 2014)'''
*<s>[http://rapidshare.com/files/286720817/swap.part4.rar Part 4.]</s> '''(dead as of Nov 2014)'''
*<s>[http://www.megaupload.com/?d=VVXZYWAH get it here from megaupload]</s> [[V&]]


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