View source for D.A.R.E.

[[File:dare.jpg|thumb|[[Typical|Figures]] their mascot would be a [[furry]].]]

D.A.R.E. ('''[[Crackwhore|Drug Abuse]] [[Unrealistic Expectations|Resistance Education]]'''; also known as '''Drugs Are Rather Enjoyable''') is a government-funded [[brainwashing]] program whose main goal is to spread [[Bullshit|bullshitery]] about [[Drugs]] through the [[Poor|public schools]] of [[America|our great and mighty land]] ([[Shit nobody cares about|and Britain, for a while]]). If you were a [[Shota|schoolboy]] or [[Loli|schoolgirl]] in the 80's, you most likely had their message of 'DRUGS ARE BAD, M'KAY?' [[Fellatio|crammed down your throat]]. Even with the support of [[Bitch|Nancy Reagan]] and despite their thourough [[Brainwashing|indoctrination]], D.A.R.E. [[Epic Fail|epicly failed]] back then since [[Truth|every single one of the students they spoke to in middle school ended out smoking pot in high school]]. A secondary goal was to get kids to snitch on their parents, typified by the subtle tactic of a cop holding weed in front of kids' faces and asking "Have you smelled this before?"

DARE is also known for taking cars seized from druggies and customizing them, which can either create something great, or a wagon of pure [[fail]].

==The Message==

A typical D.A.R.E. meeting with kids usually involved a [[Fuck the police|police officer]] coming to school to talk about drugs and alcohol. The cop would mathematically show the kids how much alcohol content would be in a beer can compared to a wine glass and a shot glass, because teens are [[sarcasm|totally]] going to think "Wow, that actually taught me some things about the dangers of alcohol" and definitely not "HOLY SHIT! I'M ONLY GONNA DRINK SHOT GLASSES FROM NOW ON!"

The cop would also tell kids about the [[OVER 9000]] chemicals in tobacco. Thanks to D.A.R.E. we now know cigarette companies [[wut|pour rat poison and rocket fuel into their products to ensure their customers will die]]. Then, the cop pulls out a dollar bill that they likely took out of their child's piggy bank, and [[KILL IT WITH FIRE|burns it]] to try and show how people burn away their money on cigarettes. Little did they know was that [[FAIL|destroying or defacing currency is a crime in the United States]].




'''''TL;DR''''': D.A.R.E would spew any kind of [[bullshit]] to keep you from hitting the nasty - [[Unrealistic expectations|drugs were around every corner]], [[Lolwut|doing crack could turn you gay]] (that one's actually true), [[Truth|your friends wanted to sell you drugs]], [[Bullshit|things like that]].

==The End Result==

{{quote|We all sat on the floor while people demonstrated people smoking, drinking, and doing drugs. It scared me a little. I was afraid that maybe the first time I tried anything, I would die. They told us how addictive crack, cocaine, and heroin are—the statistics, the numbers, the probability of becoming addicted after the first hit or dose. You know what that made me wanna do? Smoke crack, snort cocaine, and do a dose of heroin to see if I could beat the statistics. I did it all.|Some junkie in a [[Hipster|Vice]] [http://www.vice.com/en_ca/read/we-spoke-to-seven-drug-addicts-about-why-dare-failed-them interview explaining why the program has proven to be ineffective with dumbasses.]}}

In a shocking turn of events, proselytizing to teenagers with cherrypicked horror stories brought adverse effects once they realized smoking a blunt would not cause them to become a coke fiend overnight. [[Some argue|Studies]] have shown that kids who sat through the Drug Abuse Resistance Education course in school...[[Fail|were more likely to do fucking drugs]]. To put this in perspective, this would be like a sex education program that ended in higher pregnancy rates--[http://thinkprogress.org/health/2012/04/10/461402/teen-pregnancy-sex-education/ oh for fuck's sake.]

{{quote|The weakness in the old DARE program, as several studies suggest, was the simplicity of its message — and its panic-level assertions that "drug abuse is everywhere." Kids, program directors learned, don't respond well to hyperbole, and both the "Just Say No" message and the hysteria implied in the anti-drug rhetoric were pushing students away. It's also possible, some researchers speculate, that by making drugs seem more prevalent, or "normal" than they actually are, the DARE program might actually push kids who are anxious to fit in towards drugs.|[http://content.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,99564,00.html Just goes to show...] [[Truth|if you plant bullshit, you shall reap bullshit]].}}

==Fail Videos==

<center>|{{videoframe|tgvids|background:white;text-align:center;|font-weight:bold
|<youtube>2VtgbN8JGg0</youtube><br>The [[fail]] itself
|<youtube>De1vUfKg7jI</youtube><br>[[WTF|This will happen to you if you take drugs]]
|<youtube>61d20SLasbk</youtube><br>
|<youtube>3E4WfFOJ0Uc</youtube><br>OMG GUISE SMOKING [[MARIJUANA]] IZ BAD DONT DO IT KAY?}}</center>

==See Also==

*[[Cartoon all stars to the rescue]]
*[[Joe Camel]]
*[[Drugs]]

{{Drugs}}
{{Education}}
[[Category:IRL Shit]]