Encyclopedia Dramatica - Things to revert [en]

User talk:H64

2026-04-06T00:17:36Z

Yooco: /* Request for permission */ new section

== User Rights ==

So when we turn on the moderation queue only editors and above are normally unmoderated. However, you or any other admin can go to Special Pages -> User Rights and set unmoderated privs to regular (non-editor) users. The moderation queue not only prevents vandalism, but it allows for quality control. I will pass this info on to the other admins. [[User:Admin|Admin]] ([[User talk:Admin|talk]]) 01:41, 19 September 2024 (UTC)

== Lulzcon pix plz ==

Do you still have [https://web.archive.org/web/20080621152613/http://lulzcon.com/photos/v/h64/ the pics] from [[lulzcon]]?

--'''[[User:Psychotic_Dictatorship|Yours truly, Psychotic Dictatorship]]''' ([[User talk:Psychotic_Dictatorship|talk]] | [[Special:Contributions/Psychotic_Dictatorship|contribs]]) 14:54, 6 February 2025 (UTC)

:Oh hey I found [[Encyclopedia_Dramatica:Lulzcon_08_planning#San_Francisco|your comment]] on the original planning page. Anyways, if you ever do find them and have the time, plz upload them. There's practically nothing out there on this, but it seemed like a cool thing. Thanks for responding.
:--'''[[User:Psychotic_Dictatorship|Yours truly, Psychotic Dictatorship]]''' ([[User talk:Psychotic_Dictatorship|talk]] | [[Special:Contributions/Psychotic_Dictatorship|contribs]]) 05:24, 9 February 2025 (UTC)

== Re: r u active ==

Maybe. [[User:GirlOnInternet|GirlOnInternet]] ([[User talk:GirlOnInternet|talk]]) 04:56, 27 February 2025 (UTC)

== yes ==

-[[User:Baka|Baka]] ([[User talk:Baka|talk]]) 03:58, 12 March 2025 (UTC)

== re: whitedate ==

no prob. It needed to be featured on [[Portal:Sites]], its a currently relevant topic/website. plus - the task 'rotation of featured content' on Portals is often neglected, sadly.
keep up the good writing work! --[[image:DUSEDUSE CrackRabb Signature icon.png|60px|link=User:CrackRabbit]][[User:CrackRabbit|CrackRabbit]] '''|''' [[User_talk:CrackRabbit|'''Talk to me''']]'''|'''[[Special:Contributions/CrackRabbit|'''Contribs''']] 16:21, 12 January 2026 (UTC)

== [[Wyatt Tomlin]] ==

Can you hide the revision history? It has his dox (and on top of that, he was a minor at the time). - [[User:Paul in the Mall|Paul in the Mall]] ([[User talk:Paul in the Mall|talk]]) 04:49, 29 March 2026 (UTC)

== Request for permission ==

Could you please make me an EDitor so I can work with templates and skip the URL captcha? Thanks. [[User:Yooco|Yooco]] ([[User talk:Yooco|talk]]) 00:17, 6 April 2026 (UTC)

8chan

2026-04-06T00:11:48Z

Yooco: /* 8chan Gallery */ Video from the removed "How does [Screencap] work?" section of the FAQ page.

{{Achtung|HOTWHEELS IS FUCKING DEAD}}
<div style="position:fixed;bottom:0;right:0;z-index:100">[[File:Hanson_exploitable_fixed.png|70px]]</div>
[[File:8ch_bp.jpg|large|center]]

{{Infobox Chan
| imageboard_name = 8kun
| imageboard_logo = [[Image:8chan logo.png|100px]]
| date_founded = October, 2013
| Admin/Owner = [[Jim Watkins]]
| major_boards = <s>/v/, /b/, /pol/ and /furry/</s> Now just /qresearch/ and /vichan/, thanks Jim!
| epic_win = Giving people a place to go when [[m00t]] sold 4chan out for some 2/10 pussy
| homepage = <s>8ch.net</s> [https://8kun.top/index.html 8kun.top]
}}

'''[https://8kun.top/index.html 8kun]''' (formerly known as '''8chan''', also known as '''InfinityChan''', '''Hotwheels Chan''', '''Dudchan''', '''Pigchan''', and '''[[4chan]] 2: [[Electric Boogaloo]]''') is an [[FBI]] infested [[Internet]] honeypot for users who were banned from [[4chan]]. The users are mostly retards or /pol/acks from [[b|/b/]], [[pol/|/pol/]], and [[v|/v/]]. 8chan is essentially the Reddit of chans, which allows any idiot to fag on out their own personal abortion of a board to the point where the entire site has become more full of shit than a Christmas turkey. The creator and former owner of the site is a genetically deficient trainable permanently plastered to a wheelchair who lives with his Jewish lover and AZN nanny named "[[I see what you did there|Hotwheels]]". It had a low fan base of about 10-20 members prior to [[Moot|m00t]] trolling all the [[Oldfags|people]] who actually value completely unregulated [[free speech]] on out of 4chan. Then, thanks to m00t's [[Holocaust|glorious purge]], 8chan's most popular boards had thousands of [[Goodnight, sweet prince|mourning]] former [[Btards]], but eventually, Hotwheels was couped by the owner of 2chan, Jim Watkins, causing the site to become shit up and eventually died for a while from being removed by Cloudflare and general incompetence.

Some boards, such as /b/, were filled with cancer. However, [[lies|not the entire site was like this]].

== Hotwheels The Janitor ==
[[Image:Copypaste and gf.jpg|thumb|His personal pet pig enjoys "pedo-play" and "furry time"!]]

The owner of the site is Fredrick "Hotwheels" Brennan, a [[faggot]] in a wheelchair with [[AIDS|brittle bones disease]] who leaches off of his pet pedophile in exchange for little boy role-playing wherein he dresses up in kiddy pajamas and lets her suck on his malformed baby dick. Because who doesn't love a "man" that stands less than 3 feet off the ground with an undeveloped, [[adult baby|Pamper covered]] pecker who sounds like he's been huffing helium?

Before making InfinityChan, Hotwheels called himself [[Copypasta]] and was one of the admins of [[Wizardchan]], the [[imageboard]] full of [[suicidal]] [[virgins]] that [[Zoe Quinn]] accused of harassing her to try and promote her game. Which was [[ironic]] because this led to people trolling a forum full of suicidal people in the name of promoting a game about dealing with [[depression]]. Even more funny is the fact that Zoe faked the whole thing for attention after a troll from the [[Chris Chan|CWCki forum]] made a single post about her there to fuck with them.

Hotwheels however is no longer an [[admin]] on Wizardchan due to the fact that he's a cripple autistic man-child who was whoring himself out to pedophiles. Once he was exposed as a pedo-enabler, all of WizardChan flew into a fit of rage and rightly ousted him from the group.

Hotwheels replied in kind by shitting his man-Pampers with flustered indignance as he screamed on about how he'd, "Start his own chan... with pedos and social justice warriors!" as he rolled on out of the group with a pant load of ass mad.

On January 10th, 2026, He kicked the bucket.

<center><gallery>

File:Hotwheels fanart 1.png

File:Hotwheels fanart 2.png

File:Hotwheels fanart 3.jpeg

</gallery></center>

{{clear}}

== Rules ==
[[Image:Hotwheels_Captcha.png|thumb|right|Hotwheels eternal legacy: the HotCAPTCHA and errors]]
#No [[CP]].
#No [[Pedos]] at all.
#No Insulting Jim or the Moderation of 8chan.

== Notable Boards ==
8chan features the ability for anons to create and maintain their own boards. This is likely to prevent Jews and social justice warriors from taking over the central moderation and turning the site to shit, as was too late for [[reddit]], [[wikipedo]], and [[4chan|the once great board herself.]]

*'''/22/''' – Only oldfags remember /22/
*'''/b/''' – Random: Mostly pics of kids in yoga pants, raids, dubs and bitching about how 4chan sucks. Dead nowadays; good riddance.
*'''/v/''' – Video Games : A board for discussion of video games and video game culture. Unlike 4chan, discussion about #gamergate and social justice warriors is allowed.
*<s>[http://8ch.net/shame/catalog.html /shame/] – Tired of moral fags like John Oliver telling you you can't post/fap to revenge porn because it's [[The Current Year]]!? Well cum on over and have a fap and afterwards be sure to send them a message to their real facebook/phone number/employer how much you love jerking it to their nudes!</s> (gone)
*'''/pol/''' – P̶o̶l̶i̶t̶i̶c̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶I̶n̶c̶o̶r̶r̶e̶c̶t̶:̶ ̶A̶l̶w̶a̶y̶s̶ ̶r̶i̶g̶h̶t̶.̶ ̶'̶'̶P̶r̶e̶t̶t̶y̶ ̶m̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶o̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶d̶e̶c̶e̶n̶t̶ ̶b̶o̶a̶r̶d̶ ̶n̶o̶w̶.̶'̶'̶ turkish mod has turned into a cia nigger hugbox no debate anymore
*'''/[[leftypol]]/''' – Politically Incorrect For Pussies: Always wrong.
*'''/a/''' – Animu and Mango: Board for mostly anime. Weeaboos post here. Virgin central created because Hotwheelz isn't allowed on [[Wizardchan]] anymore.
*'''/tech/''' – Technology: Similar in focus to 4chan's /g/, but with less desktop threads and more programming language wars.
*'''[https://8kun.top/film/index.html /film/]''' – The last bastion of taste on the internet. /film/ was long requested on 4chan's /tv/.
*'''[https://8kun.top/lit/index.html /lit/]''' – The second to last bastion of taste on the internet. Refuge for 4chan c/lit/s.
*'''/ebola/''' – Ebola: A board devoted to the worship of Ebola-chan.
*'''/furry/''', Board Owner: PuppySky – Your new home: A containment board for furries and failed furry "artists".
*'''/younglove/''' – Pedophile Support and Discussion: A board for actual pedophiles. More focused on support and age of consent discussion than dumping CP (don't be fooled they are all plotting how to fuck kids and get away with it).
*'''/pone/''' – My Little Pony: A NSFW containment board for bronies.
*'''/vip/''' – VIP: A secret board for quality posters.
*'''/int/''' – International: [[Israel|Promised land]] for the exodus from 4chan's [[int|/int/]], also is inhabited by many [[Finland|Finns]] who left [[Krautchan]]. /intl/ won
*'''/cow/''' – Lolcow: – After [[Legi0n]], [[789chan]] and [[888chan]] have shut down they have now spread here like a bad case of internet herpes. Obsessed with [[Chris Chan]] and masturbating to fat fucks like Pixy Terry and [[Jessica Elwood]].
*'''/[[legion]]/''' – Yet another split-off group from [[888chan]]. There are like 20 of these there.
*'''/[[baphomet]]/ – "Baphomet is great, it's like /i/ or /b/ in the old days." – [[Zaiger]]. /Cow/ milks the lolcows and /baphomet/ slaughters them <s>Closed and the admin is currently on the run from the police</s> Bullshit, Benji successfully escaped to China and the board is still there
*<s>'''[http://8ch.net/wx/ /wx]''' – porn board. Good for requests, shit for fapping unless you like fapping to pics because people are too lazy to post quality gifs and vids.</s> (gone)
*'''[https://8kun.top/christian/index.html /christian/] & [https://8kun.top/islam/index.html /islam/''' – The two big religifag boards. Made for having [[snca|serious discussions about religion]]. Generally boring and unlulzy, due to both being modded to hell and back.
*'''/cuteboys/''' – The internet's #1 [[AIDS]] support group for the mentally ill.
*'''/fem/''' – The female board, Board Owner: Swami (AKA "The Insufferable Cunt")- Many hate this board with a passion, mostly because the boards owner, Swami, loves to fuck with everyone by tripfagging and stirring up shit on other boards. They always fall for it too. Mostly dudes pretending to be chicks trolling for tits and gay dudes pretending to be chicks trolling for cybersex with dudes trolling for tits. After some major drama around February and March 2015 the board got botwiped and spammed by many other boards for swami's tripfagging and shitting up on other boards. Also the /fem/ userbase was not happy about swami and they decided to abandon /fem and create new boards. Swami even got kicked out of the /fem/ skype group. The successor boards to /fem/ are: /girltak/, /tradfem/ and /beauty/.
*'''/namibia/''' – This board was created in January 2015 by /pol/acks who wanted to create their /pol/ utopia state. They had many threads on /pol/ about where they should go and they decided to start this project in Namibia because of the mild climate, the cheap land and the low population density (only mongolia is lower) of Namibia. They want to start a autonomous community with their own farms and infrastructure.
*'''/sjw/''' – A board for social justice, created in early March by <s>Nolongersilenced</s> Nolongerstraight. It is not clear whether he is in fact an autismal socjus activist or if he is just trolling 8chan but the videos he is delivering are pure gold.
*'''/kind/''' – Is 8chan's dedicated hugbox board, an area where mostly [[weeaboo]] trash go to post away from all the mean misogynistic bullies that habitat the site. /kind/ is most notable for its main rule of no bullying allowed.
*'''/intl/''' – disenchanted former /int/ users, a group of 5 vpn-shilling neckbeards who were right about everyone and everything on 8gag.
{{clear}}
*'''/newsplus/''' – The Yogapig's hugbox.
*'''/pnd/''' – pol 2: electric boogaloo.
*'''/Qresearch/''' – [[Qanon]]s main base of operation & retardation
*'''/[[MillionDollarExtreme|mde]]/''' – [[Sam Hyde]] fanfag board.

== History ==
8chan.co began in 2013 when a [[Cripple]] on shrooms decided he wanted to create [[Not4chan|a 4chan clone]]. The chan slowly got some popularity after it popped up in search results of people who were looking for another 8chan. [[Never|When it was in it's glory days]], 8chan had some shit going on in it's time. Such as the board claiming system. When boards would be put up on claim.php after some lazy bastards would forget to post in it.

This would lead to the top secret organization, [[Niggest Crook Force]] to claim all of the [[autistic]] [[My Little Pony]] boards. They would replace them with CSS stylesheets that would get on everybody's nerves. After a while though, [[Copypasta]] took the [[white knight]] route and stopped the board claiming system after he was too scared of the ncf. Pst... If you know the moderator of the board's [[IP address]], you could claim it back.

In February, [[2014]] a [[neckbeard]] named "Mr. Dinkleberg" posted a link to the cancerous chan, Kurobachan to 8chan for all faggots to see. Some anons would think it would be funny to mess with the admin of K-chan, Brandon. It turns out that Brandon was actually retarded enough to put his [[dox|personal information]] on his site. He was soon doxed and everyone on 8chan had some epic lulz. He soon demodded Mr. Dinkleberg from the site after he had an intense battle with the 8chan admin.

Afterwards, 8chan soon became more popular and stronger.

8chan split at some point into 8ch.net and 8ch.pl. 8ch.net is completely banned off Google for having boards like lolicon that got a lot of people posting CP. Even though the mods deleted the CP, the [[pedophiles]] saved copies of it on [[archive.is]]. It used to be that CP deletion meant it was gone. Now with archive.is it's stored forever. Of course pedos do it all over the internet.

{{reddit|KotakuInAction/comments/49q0cf/8ch_has_been_dmcad_on_archiveis|With a long time of DMCAs}}, the owner of archive.is said [https://blog.archive.today/post/140759318291/all-of-8chans-archives-are-down-is-there-a-way on his blog]:
{{quote2|
There are too much snapshots from 8ch.net and media.8ch.net with child porn. I see that blocking the whole 8ch.net is not a good solution, but I cannot review all the snapshots manually. Any ideas how to separate pages with CP from the rest of 8ch content?
|Denis Petrov of [[archive.is]]}}

[[Archive.is]] literally is, "IS DAT SUM CP? [[Fukken saved]]!"

== [[m00t's GamerGate Sellout]] and the Exodus to 8Chan ==

[[Image:2ch8ch.png|thumb|right|250px|Now backed by [[2ch]]]]

{{quote|4chan, the last great bastion of free speech, has fallen.|The people that 8chan doesn't want to be known to.}}

In late [[2014]], [[m00t's GamerGate Sellout]] happened. The full account of it can be found in its own article, but what you need to know in short is this:

While [[GamerGate]] was in [[meatspin|full swing]] the of GG threads on [[virgin|/v/]], [[retard|/b/]] and [[autism|/pol/]] being autosaged and deleted, with their OPs being banned.

Why was all this happening? Because m00t had sold out to the SJW's, replaced all his mods with yes-men, started hanging out with Anita Sarkeesian and dating an SJW, Jew girlfriend who worked for Gawker Media whom "donated" to his new, doomed to fail, startup in exchange for him getting rid of all the GamerGate threads probably just got tired of nerd army drama shitting up the video game board and gave them the boot, leading to a hilariously '''{{archive|nr0L7|fake}}''' chat log being crafted of moot and the "4chan mods" talking like the [[SJW]] Legion of Doom.

So for some loose [[pussy]] and a few grand that he will flush down the toilet, just like he did with his failed attempt at making a social networking site, m00t sold 4chan out.

The idea was that, if 4chan bans GamerGate threads, there will be nowhere left for people to talk about it and GamerGate will die. But instead of 4chan killing GamerGate, <s>GamerGate killed 4chan.</s> [https://i.imgur.com/yysOudJ.png lol]

=== The Exodus ===

[[Image:8chango.jpg|center]]
[[Image:Schism_of_the_pol_empire.jpg|thumb|right|/pol/ after the exodus of 4chan.]]
Soon people began doxing [[m00t]] and found out about [[Bullshit|Anita, his girlfriend and his connections with]] [[Special Olympics|the gaming press]]. Moot retaliated by removing all spam filters on /pol/ as inviting all 4channers for a shitposting party. There was only one thing left to do- Go find somewhere else to post their shitty "[[Post ending in (x) gets to name my (x)|Post ending in xxx names my penis]]" threads. Everyone with any dignity picked up their [[memes|shit]] and moved to 8chan.

Will this last forever or will they come crawling back when GamerGate ends? [[yes|No one knows]]. What we do know is that m00t is a [[sellout]] and a [[faggot]]. Also, 8chan is a word filter on 4chan and typing it will result in the system thinking your post "contains spam" also, 8chan is a banned ULR on 4chan and posting it will result in an automatic ban.

{{quote|[[Backstabber|Moot]] had completely [[Backstabbed|stabbed 4chan in the back,]] so we made a great exodus to 8chan, where we now find solace, safety and freedom.
'''ALL HAIL HOTWHEELS.'''|Never forgive, never forget.}}

=== Official Statement ===

[[Image:8chan wheeler.jpg|right|300px]]

{{squote|'''I am the administrator of 8chan.co, an imageboard that supports free speech and allows the users to decide their own destiny by making and moderating their own boards.

'''My site is in stark contrast to 4chan where a small cabal of old "do it for free" moderators decide which content is acceptable or not and where only moot decides which boards are available to users.

'''8chan.co, like any large website, has many server expenses as well as my time in developing new features. With the new influx of traffic, the server now costs $60/mo for me to run.

'''8chan.co is a not for profit unlike 4chan. If this gets big I expect to apply for 501(c)(3) status and any excess money will be donated to other charitable causes like [[WikiLeaks]] and the EFF.

'''If you can, please donate, because right now donations are not enough to maintain the server in October. However, even before this page was put up I was given enough for September.

'''Thank you for your consideration. Any questions please ask me in IRC (#8chan @ irc.rizon.net) or email admin@8chan.co.'''}}

[[File:Hotwheels_pigs.png|thumb|right]]
== Partnership with Jim and moving to the Philippines ==

In October 2014, Hotman sold 8chan to [[2ch|Jim Watkins]] and moved to the Philippines. The official reason was that after gaymergayt, 8chan.co had more traffic and he needed better infrastructure but we all know that it was only for them [[Jew|shekels]]. For his shit site he already got more than he could have ever hoped for and it would take half a year before the first ones realize what a kike Breddit really was.

==Who Owns 8chan?==
<center>
<gallery perrow="5" widths="120px">
File:8chan_ips.png
File:Inhisownwords.png
File:Whoowns8gag.png
File:Codemonkey_1.jpg
File:Jim_dog.jpg
</gallery>
</center>

== The great DDoS attack ==

[[Last Thursday|2015-01-07]] was the day when 2ch owner [[Jim Watkins]] orchestrated a giantic DDoS attack on 8chan.co. All the retards from 8chan failed to see this obvious false flag and blamed other faggots for it. <\br>
During the DDoS attack, Slim Jim came to help Freddit Breddit and presented himself as the benevolent white knight. The 8chan.co domain was seized by the rulecuck government of Colombia and Slim Jim registered a new one called 8ch.net. The new site was hosted for this domain and after regaining the old domain they just redirected it to 8ch.net instead of switching back. So basically after the DDoS attack, Jim seized control of cripplechan's domain AND he was in control of the servers. This means he was the one who owned cripplechan since January 2015. All in all this DDoS was by coincidence pretty convenient for his interests.

There were also some minor incidents with cripplechan's [[baphomet]] board but most of the time they were useless faggots and never achieved anything.

== Intimidation Game ==

After the baphomet drama the genetic goblin once again saw a chance to whore for even more attention. He already planned to flood his shit site with redditors in a few months and the next oppurtunity was perfect. Following the baphomet drama from January, a new gamergate-based episode was planned for law & order, special snowflake unit. Brettit took over the domains of redchanit and used idiots from baphomet to make the site better known on leddit and other normie sites.

{{cg|Redchanit|cg1|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Rechanit.jpg|Hotwheels trolling SJWs 1
File:Redchanit2.png|Hotwheels trolling SJWs 2
File:Redchanit3.jpg|Hotwheels trolling SJWs 3
File:Redchanit4.jpg|Hotwheels trolling SJWs 4
File:Redchanitmask.jpg|The ridiculous masks they used
</gallery>
|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Variousshops.jpg|This was actually filmed in the ego perspective for the final shootout and people shopped the shit out of it
File:RedchanISIS.jpg|The ISIS like scene where anons shopped bane, pepe and wodjak into
File:Doesyourson.jpg|No shit, this is the actual text from the scene
File:Redchanitanon.png|red anon wearing the dumb mask
File:Levelup1.jpg|from the "leveld up" phrase
File:Levelup2.jpg|also from the leveld up part
</gallery>}}

== /sjw/ board ==
{{main|Nolongersilenced}}
Nolongerstraight was basically a troll who rused all of 8chan. When he started his SJW board in March 2015 they were all in full paranoia mode. He made them raid his board many times and somewhen after a few weeks he lost interest and just left them retards. Until this day the 8gaggers believe they "won" this conflict.

== Gamergate interboard drama ==
{{main|Gamergate}}
Gaymergayters were constantly having internal drama. First they had 13 year olds like Blade and Niko who lead their movement, then they got owned by Ayyteam. Their board was devasted and Acidcuck became the leader of a new gaymergayt board. After half a year it was revealed that acidcuck was a sexual degenerate who was possibly an FBI informant and data mining faggot.

<center>
<gallery widths="120px" perrow="6">
File:Ayyteam.png|Gamergay tears
File:Acid Cuck in March 2015.png|But wait, Acidcuck is here to help
File:GGRevolt.png|More GG drama
File:Acid.png|Acid exposed
File:Notbestchoice.jpg|/v/'s Mark approves...
File:Rankinglist.png|cuckHQ is in rapid decline and down from 2000 active users to about 250
</gallery>
</center>

== The april fool's raid and creation of /intl/ ==
On 1st of April 2015 /int/ decided to raid /pol/ with smug anime girls. Stromfags got triggered and started banning everyone who posted anime content.
The raid transformed into a war over the days and a wikia page that is even more autistic than this article was created about it.
Some of the raiding anons were not OK with a few things they noticed. /intl/ was born and it declared war to all rulecucks.
Since its crusade started, intl created shitloads of OC and triggered 8gaggers into raiding their boards several times.

{{cg|The april fool's raid and creation of /intl/|cg2|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Polfagsbtfo.png
File:Warofpol.jpg
File:UBFF.png
File:Intltldr.png|the tldr version
File:Hehpill.png
</gallery>
|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Hehpiru.png
File:Negri.png|Negrin, the intl trademark
File:Intlcopypasta.png
</gallery>}}

== Freddit Breddit ==
In Summer 2015 Breddit decided that it was time for the next step. He basically wanted to flood his shit site with redditors. When the fatpeoplehate faggots got purged from leddit, he offered them 8chan as their new home. He was even shilling officially on reddit with an AMA and ads. Anons raged and he didnt give a shit about it. However, thanks to /intl/ no reddit exodus ever came to 8chan as they managed to scare away about 3 reddit exoduses from 8gag. Breddit was mad at them and started to whore for sheckels on /b/. Only a few months later he was confirirmed for rulecuck. He ordered his hotpockets to ban "obscure images" from movies like "American Beauty". This was the time Breddit stopped to give a shit about 8gag and hired Jewsh to develop Infinity Never. He also lied about the captcha system and how it was only "a temporary thing".

{{cg|Freddit Breddit|cg3|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:BasedHW.png|This is how it started...
File:8gagshills.png
File:Bredditshilling.jpg
File:FreddytBreddit.jpg
File:Lmao8gag.png
</gallery>
|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:8chcaptcha.jpg
File:Nirvanagate.png
File:Geneticgoblin.png|and this it how it ended
</gallery>}}

== Infinity Never Ever ==
After Hotwheels sold his shit to [[2channel|"Jimmy the Jew"]] he started working on what he called ''The Next Big Thing'' not as an owner as [[gamergate|everyone]] thought.
He bragged far and wide about this ''next big thing'' which was supposed to [[web 2.0|revolutionize]] how you used imageboards. The next version of infinite-chan was supposed to be called Infinite Next, HotWheels recruited many neckbeards for this task, but his single biggest mistake was trusting a faggot known as <s>{{twitter|ItsJoshProbably|"n-tech" aka Josh}}</s> '''[[Banned|SUSPENDED!]]''' '''{{archive|z4HOn|(Archived)}}'''. 

<center><big>BACKSTORY</big> </center>

7 months ago Josh fucked up [[8chan|MidgetChan]] by making the site slower and slower, because Josh is a narcissistic moron who thinks that algorithmic complexity does not apply to his horrible code. Now Hotwheels did his best, which was close to nothing, to keep users from leaving his shit site to go to Twitter or somewhere, but almost all of them thankfully fled to any place that would let them in. [[Lie|This wasn't necessarily HotWheels' fault]], because he has the IQ of a [[woman|retard]].
 
<center><big>HotWheels shit explanation of what went wrong:</big> </center>
<pre>
Someone reported to me that posting on certain boards was taking longer than usual, especially /v/.
I poked around a bit on the server and found that I couldn't insert into the board stats table.
I tried restarting MySQL, the `stop` command hung.
kill -2 also hung.
kill -9 did the trick, but as we know from DB admin school (lol), that's a bad thing to do to a DB.
Of course, MySQL didn't start after that. Blah blah u broke me pls inno_db_recovery OK.
Oh shit, I've never done this before. Restart MySQL, read-only tables. StackOverbutts says
"you're not supposed to leave recovery mode on, idiot!" Oops. Take it off, restart DB.
MySQL has now given up on life. Hmm...
No one seems to be using it...wtf...
Make some random inserts/selects into board_stats, antispam, posts_v, anything to get it to hang and explain this. Nothing works.
All tables are readable, no locks.
Well, I do have VFEC, but I broke it because I'm working on it. Revert to last known working commit and...make a post...it submits...
OK MySQL isn't the problem. No one is trying to access it.
Fuck around with nginx/php-fpm. Suddenly they start working, I guess they all had open connections to the gone MySQL server.
Fuck if I know what actually made them start working after a restart
</pre>

<center><big>HotWeels has his own safespace</big> </center>
<pre>
Dec 20 13:57:48 <copypaste> do like i do, make announcements that can't be replied to
Dec 20 13:57:51 <copypaste> read their replies if you care
Dec 20 13:57:58 <copypaste> rinse and repeat
Dec 20 13:58:19 <copypaste> i've developed this strategy after seeing that previous ones fail
Dec 20 13:58:32 <copypaste> it works well, and they hate it because it works well
Dec 20 14:00:39 <copypaste> oh, there's a part two
Dec 20 14:00:44 <copypaste> anything i want feedback on is nunu's job
Dec 20 14:00:51 <copypaste> to collect the responses
Dec 20 14:01:04 <copypaste> and distill them to some meme-free content-full summary
</pre>

After this n-tech and HotWheels has had a few calm reasonable talks about this, where HotWheels being the beta that he is buckled under peer pressure and wrote a fucking essay on the SJW site medium. It is not like he has his own site. There he [[crying|explained]] '''{{archive|17zGt|what had transpired}}''' 

Then it was revealed, [[Edward Snowden]] style, that despite HotWheels proclaiming that his shitty site would support both free speech and the privacy of the users, '''{{archive|x4kWy|that everything was fucking logged}}''', so it was ready to be bargained with, in case the FBI wanted to browse some warez.

>Josh knowingly enabled debugging

>Josh didn't care

{{Quote|If you don't want to risk having your IP exposed don't visit the kiddy fucking board on the beta site|Josh}}

But because Josh is a fucking skid with no coding experience, he enabled debugging for the entire fucking site. You would think not having your IP exposed to the entire world, would be of a concern to everyone and not just [[Pedophilia|the good guys?]]. After Jewsh fucked up he boarded an aircraft and fled back to burgerland because he thought Slim Jim is a mafia guy and his pig farm was for getting rid of corpses.

But then again HotWheels sold his site to someone who's been known to farm and sell user info.

'''Update 8/2/2016'''

Josh has decided to [[crying|explain]] '''{{archive|ocprY|his side of the story}}'''
<center>
<gallery widths="120px">
File:Jewsh.png|courtesy of intl
File:Pigfarm.png|jewsh visiting a pig farm
File:Ipleak.png|just don't go to the cp board bruh
File:Intlwuzriteagen.png|intl was right again
</gallery>
</center>

== The cripple is kill ==
Remember when the cripple laughed about [[moot]] for quitting? After Infinity Never, Hothead was pretending he was fixing the site. However, beeing the genetic dud he is, he was unable to do so and most of the fixing was made by based Ron. Ron is the son of Jim and developer over at 2ch. In May 2016 it was revealed that the genetic goblin was demoted from site admin to tech consultant and that he gave over the admin account to Jim and Ron. Ron was based and actually fixing the posting errors of the site, however Jim was a total rueleuck. After taking control he went on to ban pedos, TOR nodes, VPNs and anyone who dared to critisize him. A day later he tried to damage-control but failed hard. As of now, the new 8gag policy is to not tolerate pedofags and the 8gaggers have lost their sanctuary of freedumb of speach.

== 8chan BTFO by Librechan ==
[[File:Eggy_btfo.png|large|center|REKT]]
eggy man omlet BTFO

<center>
<gallery widths="120px">
File:Bredditabout8gag.png|what Breddit thinks about 8chan
File:Demoted.png
File:Exodus2.0.png
File:Pedosbtfo.png|Pedofags BTFO
</gallery>
</center>

== Death and Rebirth as 8kun(t) ==

In 2019, while lulz and OC was winding down from the site leaving only /b/, /v/ and /pol/ to have any activity whatsoever, a <s>Kiwi</s>[[Australia|Aussie]] known as [[Brenton Tarrant]] announced his intent to become [[an hero]], achieving a high score of 51/49 (40 directly) in kebab removal. Shortly afterwards, it being on /pol/, there was mass celebrations and donning of skullmasks and [[edgy]] attempts at [[Forced meme|memetic warfare]] being done in his name, and even a few failed an hero attempts like the Poway shooting. This would continue as normal and not produce anything similar until, in September 2019, Patrick Cruisius would shoot up a mall full of spics in El Paso, challenging this high score with 23/23 while still falling behind Tarrant. Hotwheels cucked massively and [[Troll's remorse|felt bad about the site he created]] and caused CloudFlare to pull the plug, despite the fact that the manifesto was posted on instagram first hours before anyways.

This left the site down for about 2 months, as the userbase scrambled to find new homes on the "alt-chan" webring, some to never return. However, an overly produced and tacky announcement came out about the rebrand of the site as 8kun, and it came back. Hotwheels continued to get pissed about this site's existence and booted them off fucktons of hosting services and shilling himself on VICE documentaries leaving 8kunt to host out of an asshole in [[China]] or [[Taiwan]] or something. While this was going on, Jim Watkin's mental state continued declining, with Freddit even getting v& in the Failipines for pointing this out over [[srsly|"Defamation"]] laws, resulting in the firing of Mark and axing of /v/'s entire userbase, moving base to 8chan.moe with some other boards. These same leaked logs also finally cemented Watkins as an absolute shill, only keeping his staff around to promote [[QAnon]] news links, interestingly enough Hotwheels is 10000% convinced that Q is Jim Watkins over or related to this ordeal. Even his own son, Ron, packed bags and left over his absolute incompetence.

Nowadays, 8kun.top lies in a dormant state, with the only real activity coming from [[boomer]] shitholes like /qresearch/ or /pnd/ (/pol/ in all but name) and the cancerous polish /vichan/. All posts now have an annoying ass disclaimer at the end of them and the site lies riddled with technical issues despite being given forever to fix them. Seeing this, oldfags may have gone back to 4chan or just [[TOR|went dark entirely now.]]

TL;DR: The only thing accomplished in the cleanse was btfoing all the pedofags and drumpf hating neo-nazis

<center>
<gallery widths="120px">
File:JimCucksV.png|Jim Watkins telling Mark that only Qboomers matter to him
</gallery>
</center>

== Original Content ==
Since [[M00t's_GamerGate_Sellout| the 2014 exodus'/exoduses]] many [[butthurt|disenchanted oldfags]], [[Gamergate]]rs and /pol/uters have left [[4chan|cuckchan]] and migrated to 8chan.
As their [[autism|creativity]] now went to 8chan it had to be expected that new [[stolen|original content]] macro images will be created soon by them.

Unfortunately the uncreative fucks they are, no major OC was generated in over 18 months. The main drama and OC creators were /intl/ and they are not even to be considered as real 8gaggers as they have their own imageboard now.

{{cg|"Original Content"|cg4|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:Red_anon_creation.png|The birth of red anon
File:As_recently.png|Fortunately some anon screencapped it
File:SJW Bizarro Vivian.png| A butthurt twitter [[SJW]] made a [[anti-lulz|unfunny]] swap palette version of [[Vivian James]].
File:Polina0.jpg|First template (after discovered by 8chan)
File:Polina1.png|changed clothing and hair
</gallery>
|
<gallery>
File:Polina2.jpg|with explanations added
File:Erika1.png|The final design
File:Erika2.png|Isn't it nice?
File:Erikacons.png|widely used on 8chan
</gallery>}}

==8chan Gallery==

{{cg||cg5|center|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:8chan logo.png
File:8chanfavicon.png
File:8chan.jpg
File:8chan0.png
File:8chango0.png
</gallery>
|
<gallery perrow="5">
File:8chanlogo.jpg
File:8chanlogo0.jpg
File:8chanlogo1.jpg
File:8chanlogo2.jpg
File:8chanlogo3.jpg
File:8chanlogo4.jpg
File:8chanlogo5.png
File:8chanlogo6.png
File:Red_anon.png|the official mascot
File:Redanon.png|much better than cuckchans green anon
File:8chPolAcad.png|8chan's /pol/ academy
File:Hopinlooser.jpg|your new home
File:Premiumacc.png|pranking the 4chan gold account system
File:8christm.png|Christmas 2014 on 8chan
File:8chjeep.jpg|all your friends from 8chan
File:MSInfinity.jpg|the new emperor
File:ThuglifeHW.jpg|serious gunplay
File:Hotwheels Final Form.jpg|his final form
File:Back24chan.jpg|Farewell, you won't be missed.
File:Ben Garrison visits 8chan.jpg|The [[Ben Garrison|One Man Klan]] visits /pol/.
File:Storm.eight.chan.jpg|breaking news, sources are telling me that [[Dylann Storm Roof|dylann]] hero is a relative of 8chan man or toronto
File:Mvhpanels0.png|[[Exploitable]]
File:Mvhpanels1.jpg
File:Mvhpanels2.png
File:Mvhpanels3.jpg
File:Mvhpanels4.jpg
File:Pig Guy.jpg
File:8chan Superheroes.jpg
Image:Hotwheels vs Moot.jpg|m00t lost.
File:HotwheelsMAGA1.jpg|Hotwheel's plushie and MAGA hat :3
File:HotwheelsMAGA2.jpg
File:SCdemo8ch.webm|Video from the removed "How does [Screencap] work?" section of the FAQ page.
</gallery>}}

== Trivia ==
Many anons (including /Baphomet/) have been pretending to be 8chan Oldfags but usually they are <s>spotted very quickly by Hotwheels because they have no idea about trivial things from 2013/2014</s> [[Autism|ranted at for not knowing anything about Hungarian Imageboards]]. The original editor was too lazy to write out all the trivia himself, so read these pics instead.

<center>
<gallery widths="120px">
File:Exoduses so far.png
File:8chan trivia.png
File:4chan Vs 8chan.png
</gallery>
</center>

== Related articles ==

[[Image:Ben Garrison 8chan Art.jpg|200px|right]]

[[File:fredisdead.png|200px|left|thumb|rest in piss sweet prince.]]

*[[Jim Watkins]]
*[[GamerGate]]
*[[4chan]]
*[[m00t's GamerGate Sellout]]
*[[MasterChan]]
*[[Wizardchan]]
*[[Baphomet|/baphomet/]]
*[[Brownpill]]
*[[Fat Furry]] - The site owner, Hot wheels enjoys rolling himself in mountains of fat Furry flesh.
*[[Brenton Tarrant]] – Went to 8chan to setup a live stream of him shooting 49 [[New Zealand]] Christchurch victims.
*[[Null]] – Formally admin of [[Kiwi Farms]], now works at 8chan after scamming the midget out of 12k in exchange for code that doesn't work.
*[[Foxworth]] – A [[sick fuck]] from 8chan.
*[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] – a site that 8chan faggots love to shit up before learning how to wiki.
*[[Voat]] – Reddit's 8chan.
*[[NeoGAF]] – [[Tyler Malka]] calls 8chan 'basement dwelling terrorists', before he [[Cucked|admit he's on the wrong side of history]].
*[[ResetERA]] – NeoGAF 2: Electric Boogaloo. Now with more pedophiles and trannies for mods.

== External links ==
*{{twitter|infinitechan}}
*{{yt|c|UCSGRSElYnWN3f9yI7eg64WA|8chan YouTube channel}}
*'''{{archive|rBt7n|Google removes 8chan from its searches}}'''
*'''{{ds|hotwheels-why-i-support-eugenics/|"Hotwheels: Why I Support Eugenics"}}''' – Brennan on [[eugenics]] published at The Daily Stormer
*'''{{pastebin|eTWJDqHN|8CHAN IS COMPRIMISED AND LOGS IPS INDEFINITELY}}'''
*[https://94chan.org/pol/thread/2023.html#2180 Garden variety /pol/ thread about Hitler comes together, declares October 15th Fuck 8chan Day], proving [[furry|8chan]] can't even avoid getting [[goatse|blasted]] by a website that has been dead [[at least 100 years|longer]] than they've existed. Thread is currently [[dead|winding down]], but the sheer amounts of [[autism|'tard drama]] bursting forth at [[TL;DR|9 alphanumeric glyphs]] resulted in several lulzy events including at least 1 board on 8chan [[buy a dog|fully locking down posting]] as well as adding "[[Mudkips|94chan]]" to the [[B&|spamfilter]] in response to the actions of [[Al-Qaeda|like 3 bored zoomers]], before coming to the thread and getting their shit boxed by [[Brittany Holechko|a 30 year old housewife]] and a bunch of [[retards]] who were screeching like [[nigger|gibbons]] introduced to [[Kirtaner|viagra and meth]] simultaneously over (of all fucking things) [[flaggot|flags]].

{{Lulcowboard}}
{{Goodguys}}
{{GamerGate}}
{{8chan}}
{{chans}}
{{sites}}
{{Brenton Tarrant}}

{{timeline|Featured article October 10 & 11, [[2014]]|[[m00t's GamerGate Sellout]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Mighty No. 9]]}}

{{timeline|Featured article March 15 & 16, [[2026]]|[[Philadelphia]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Ginger]]}}

File:SCdemo8ch.webm

2026-04-06T00:10:56Z

Yooco: Original URL was: https://8ch.net/static/SCdemo8ch.webm (deleted, no archives). Was embedded on: https://8ch.net/faq.html

== Summary ==
Original URL was: https://8ch.net/static/SCdemo8ch.webm (deleted, no archives).
Was embedded on: https://8ch.net/faq.html

PROTIP

2026-02-16T18:26:21Z

Yooco: + Charge Google back

{{perfect}}

<center>A '''''PROTIP''''' is a tip intended to convert you from a [[noob|novice]] to an [[expert]] in one easy step.</center>

[[File:Protip.jpg|center]]

__NOTOC__
==PROTIP about [[Trolls]]==
{{quote|[[Obvious|Calling a troll a troll is not trolling]]. [[Leet|You troll a troll by letting him believe he's trolling when it's obvious he's not]]. [[Pwn|The success of a troll relies on the position they know something you don't]]. The internet is a never ending [[Rule 34|exhibition of individual superiority]] and [[Trolls|adversity]], this is the fundamental [[Cancer|distinction between my /b/ and this /b/]]. Too many of [[Faggots|you]] have completely [[lost the game]].''|A [[Veteran|pro]] [[Btard|/b/tard]]}}

==Gallery==
<center><gallery perrow="5">
File:Csprotip - UncleBastard.jpg
File:Aeris Protip - UncleBastard.jpg
File:Protip Many.jpg
File:Do not use your genitals to stop a chainsaw blade.jpeg
File:Don't touch the girls.gif
</gallery></center>

==List of '''''PROTIPS:'''''==
*[[Barrel Roll|Barrel Roll]]
*[[Sloth|Crotch Punch]]
*[[Falcon Punch|Falcon Punch]]
*[[Fake editor|Improve edit count]]
* Charge [[Google]] back
*[[Suicide#Pro_Tips|Suicide]]
*[[You|You]] [[Sex|can't!]]

==See Also==
*[[Video_Game_Reviewers/List_of_Reviewers#Gaming_in_the_Clinton_Years_.2F_Navgtr|NAVGTR]]
*[[Advice Dog]]
*[[Doom]]

==External Links==
*[http://www.haveaprotip.com/ Have a Protip]
*[http://protipoftheday.com/ Pro Tip of the Day]
*[http://protips.tumblr.com/ Protips on tumblr]
*[http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2007/9/21/ Penny Arcade - "The Protip" (9/21/07)]
:*[http://www.penny-arcade.com/2007/9/21/ Accompanying blog entry]
*[http://protips.co Submit your own protips!]
{{language}}

User talk:Chuj

2026-02-16T06:02:45Z

Yooco: /* Could you please +EDitor me? */ new section

{{welcome}}

faggot polak [[File:Tabby-icon.png|35px|link=User:Tabs]][[User:Tabs| Conciërge Kaptein-Commandant Tabs]] [[User_talk:Tabs|æ]][[Special:Contributions/Tabs|✎]][[Special:Log/block/Tabs|࿕]][[Special:ListAdmins|♛]]</big> 12:02, 4 July 2021 (EDT)

==welcome==
[[File:polish guy.png]]

welcome back. potatoes, onions, and pickles have been waiting [[User:.wil|.wil]] [[File:Gondola.gif|60px|link=User talk:.wil]] 09:00, 11 January 2022 (EST)

==Title==
Fix the editor so it can show pics. Right now it only shows pics in the preview but not in prod. I tried to complain but they didn't care. I refuse to waste my time on a broken editor. Also, idk how "talk" works, so i am posting this here. {{unsigned|ThisIsFine}}
::[https://files.catbox.moe/bhtquq.png works on my machine] --[[User:Chuj|Chuj]] ([[User talk:Chuj|talk]]) 10:59, 10 November 2025 (UTC)

== Could you please +EDitor me? ==

I would like to skip the CAPTCHA in future, and I would like to work with templates.

Thank you. [[User:Yooco|Yooco]] ([[User talk:Yooco|talk]]) 06:02, 16 February 2026 (UTC)

The Google

2026-02-16T06:00:23Z

Yooco: Google loves juicy chargebacks (not).

{{achtung|Google bought USELESS [https://www.businessinsider.com/google-just-bought-boston-dynamics-2013-12 Boston Dynamics] Enjoy your last days of sanity, free nasty illegal child porn, closure of your ENTIRE GOOGLE 2005-present accounts & freedom that seldom was - JUST FOR THE HELL OF IT!!!}}
[[File:biggoogleiswatchingyou.png|400px|center]]

[[File:Google Skynet Invasion.png|thumb|250px|Google skynet. No one is safe.]]
[[File:502 Server Error.png|thumb|Google is prone to internal server errors on a regular basis.]]
[[File:Googleknowswhotheyreallyare.png|thumb|Google tells the truth as it is.]]

[[File:Skynet-google2.jpg|thumb]]

'''[https://www.wsj.com/articles/BL-WB-1313 The Google]''' is an extremely popular marketing agency. If you've ever wanted a search engine where you can search for misinformation disinformation, then Google is it. One uses google to find most nasty porn there is, illegal too. Google also hosts youtube where they display 16 year old wikiwhores {[[16-year-old girl|16-year-old girls]]) getting it on with Google's CEO nasty freaks Sundar Pichai and wikipedia's flounder king nothing, Bomis child porn king [[jimbo Wales]]... India is pissed off about not getting any and fines google tons of money.<ref>https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-63333628</ref>. Remember: if it isn't on Google IT DOES<del>N'T</del> EXIST. Though expansive in nature, The Google is also run by a bunch of pussies who will submit to any country's request for censorship. [https://www.wired.com/2010/04/google-china-and-censorship-a-wiredcom-faq/ Excluding China]. They once censored [[Aboriginal|this totally awesome ED page]] in the [[Australian]] version of Google. For this, Google is a possible candidate for [[Anonymous]]'s shitlist. Turbify.com website services (its quasi ceo is Jason Minder, real CEO is American-Indian pervert Sanjay Govil. He founded Infinite Compiter Solutions LLC part of Aabaco Small Business LLCm full of illiterate Hindus) provides backup storage to google, just in case if feds delete nice illegal material. Tucows aka the cow rapists from Ontario, Canada. They provide IPs to Turbify.com from Rockville, MD and India... Both Turbify and Tucows are located outside America and thus are used to circumnavigate American laws with ICANN's blessings. ICANN.org helps Tucows and Turbiy partners in crime rape cows the right way. They help rape bulls too. They also help milk the bulls.<ref>web.archive.org/web/20240330114321/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yahoo!_Inc._%281995%E2%80%932017%29#Aabaco_Small_Business_aka_Turbify_aka_Infinite_Computer_Solutions/Tucows_IPs_Registrar
web.archive.org/web/20240201093903/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category_talk:American_people_of_Indian_descent#Sanjay_Govil's_Very_Very_Very_Controversial_Business_Ventures!!!
web.archive.org/web/20240103100535/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talk:Sanjay_Govil/Archive_1#Is_Turbify_connected_to_Govil's_company? </ref> Tucows also uses ztomy.com to hijack innocent sites. Criminal activity is what tucows/turbify/icann, google stand for & specialize in!!! <ref>https://www.namepros.com/threads/scam-network-solutions-ztomy-com-ns1642-ztomy-com.872246/</ref>

Jewgle is known for its constant gathering of personal information, which is to help its only income source, AdSense/AdWords. However this is [[moot]] because most of its adsense revenue is from [[cloaking]], scraper site adsense farms that click on their own ads. For instance, [[WikiFur]]'s '''{{wf|WikiFur:Ledger|ledger}}''' says it has spent thousands on Google ads, but the only people who clicked on those ads were clickbots. All of WikiFur's new visitors came from ED and some even donated.

Google is now working with [[Verizon]] to become the final boss of the internet by [https://www.sfgate.com/opinion/article/net-neutrality-lost-in-google-verizon-deal-3256429.php buying special pipes which allow them to keep people from using any part of the internet that isn't theirs.] It is only a matter of time before they own [[everything]].

[[PROTIP]] for Google users: Google really loves juicy chargebacks!<ref>[https://www.virtualcuriosities.com/articles/3393/danger-chargeback-equals-account-permanently-banned DANGER!!!: Chargeback = ACCOUNT PERMANENTLY BANNED. - Virtual curiosities]</ref><ref>[https://old.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/zndbku/tifu_by_accidentally_buying_two_google_pixels_and/ TIFU by accidentally buying two Google Pixels and ended up getting my 15 year old Google Account permanently banned. - Reddit]</ref>

==Google 411==
[[Image:blindwipe.jpg|thumb|right|Google knows how [[Stupid|blind]] people wipe.]]
Phone service that Google uses to gather information about speech, phonology, phonetics. This way they can data-mine you more with quantitative linguistics, computational linguistics, speech recognition and phonematic and phonetic transcriptions (speech to text).

==Google Images==
[[image:Weirdass_google_search.jpg|thumb|left|Google image search results [[Has_anyone_really_been_far_even_as_decided_to_use_even_go_want_to_do_look_more_like?|make sense.]] Sometimes.]]

'''Google Images''' allows a user to search for pr0n images related to a particular search term. Perfect for finding illustrations for [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]], pictures of [[cock]] [https://www.google.com/search?q=uncut+cock&tbm=isch], [[Gif war|GIF wars]], and [[Fifty Hitler Post]]s. And pr0n. And people. And [https://www.google.com.au/search?safe=off&q=hamster+porn&tbm=isch hamster porn]. And '''{{archive|ZHbRv|Lego porn}}'''. To sum it up, google images is a shit stain on human history.

Google Images is also a key component in the game ''[[Google Seppuku]]'', but since that's now an [[old meme]], [[nobody gives a shit]] about that anymore. Google Images is famous for giving pr0n for non-related searches, and will even give pr0n when looking up about cats.

[[Image:Whatcha-drinking.jpg|thumb|right|[[X in my Y|Furries?? In my Google??]]]]

==My Pr0n! My Pr0n! My Kingdom for some Pr0n!==
In late 2012, Google renewed their ongoing contact with [[Satan]], and part of the new deal was that they had to place mysterious bowls of chocolate pudding in the form of a pentagram down in the '''secret room''' deep beneath Google HQ where the souls of the search engines they have killed in the past are kept in clear glass jars. Once this was done, mysterious and wonderful code filled the minds of Google engineers as they waddled and Segwayed back and forth between the buffet and their desks. They immediately began writing a new search algorithm which would not only make search results more relevant to the user's query, but also help indoctrinate users so that every other search engine would seem like a cluttered mess in comparison.

{{quote|''I searched for pussy, and didn't see any sweet poontang.''|Someone too stupid to add a porn keyword like Google told them to.}}

{{quote|''Wow! Google is actually showing me what I searched for instead of semi-naked women!''|Totally not an Astroturf PR agent.}}

{{quote|''This is like when Hitler killed six million Jews.''|Typical [[Reddit]] post.}}

''Google showed they didn't care about free speech by refusing to address the completely valid accusations that they were worse than [[Hitler]], oppressing furries, and frequently drowning puppies in a hot tub of champagne.''

=== images.google.com and ED ===
Most articles on [[ED]] are accompanied by images culled from images.google.com, without much forethought. Authors simply look up their search term (or pr0n) and add the first image that comes up. Those with extra time actually search through the results to find the most fitting image, but that usually isn't as funny. It does give them an excuse to look through more pr0n though.

For a more detailed analysis of the fine pr0n art of selecting an image for an ED article, see [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:Image Selection Process|Image Selection Process]] (See Also: [[Porn]])

=== ED and images.google.com ===
The reciprocal relationship between Google images and [[ED]] is an interesting one. [https://www.google.com/search?q=site%3Ahttps%3A%2F%2Fencyclopediadramatica.online&tbm=isch&hl=en Searching for all images on Encyclopedia Dramatica] results in 0 matches with Safe Search on, but about 3,400 matches with this inappropriate image blocker disabled. This proves once and for all that ED is 100% <strike>pr0n</strike> [[awesome]].

However, this is not the case for Safe Search and text results. Regardless of being totally aware of the nature of ED's images, somehow, Safe Search considers some of the most disturbing subjects on encyclopediadramatica to be fair game for young, innocent eyes. This is undoubtedly due to the fact that [[the man]] understands the true nature of ED being the satirical festering epitome of teh internets, meaning it should in fact be the first thing a child [[evar]] sees on the [[series of tubes]] as it will set a decent precedent for all the bullshit information presented as truth throughout the interwebs, making them appropriately cautionary when researching for a paragraph they have to write about geography or bats or some shit. 

=== Typical Google Images Search ===

Let's say you search for images of "X". Here's how the search results will go.

*Page 1: You're doing okay, results are 100% X
*Page 2: Pretty good, results are 80% X, plus a couple of shitty [[lolcats]] pictures.
*Page 3: Getting colder, results are 65% X, the other 35% is pictures of shitbox cars for sale and cartoons.
*Page 4: Hiiii-way to- the- Danjuh Zone! (Da-nuh-na-na-nuh-nuh!). Results are 50% X, the other half is a mix of pictures of homicide victims and "art" from some uppity-ass hipster's blog.
*Page 5: Uh-oh. Results are 20% X, 80% is pictures of shitty civilian M16 knock-offs andthe winners of last year's Budd Dwyer look-a-like contest, plus a bit of porn.
*Page 6: Good or bad, depending on what you're looking for. Results are 5% X, the rest is porn.
*Page 7: Porn
*Page 8: Porn
*Page 9: Porn
*Page 10: Porn (Get the general idea?)

==I Feels Lucky==
[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|[[Google|Google Chrome]] knows that Google.co.uk is a cover for attackers to install [[malware]] on your computer]]
Probably the most useful feature [[Google]] has, besides porn. Also an important step in the [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:Image Selection Process|Image Selection Process]] and [[Google bomb]]ing.

==Google Adsense==
[[Image:Google_targeted_adds.png|thumb|right|Google knows how to specifically tailor their ads based on user preferences.]]
The second most useful feature besides [[porn]]. Excellent way to make quick money for [[poor]] people.

==Other Google Features==
===Google Maps===

The [[Internet stalking|Internet stalkers]]'s new best friend, Google Maps [https://www.google.com/maps] allows you to tell Google exactly where you live by typing in your address and zooming all the way in on your own house. This information is combined with all search terms associated with your IP address, and then sold to the [[CIA]]. If you have a really big TV, you could maybe see your porn on the satellite, or if your neighbors are making porn. You can also use [[Wikimapia]]'s version of Google Maps to provide accurate details of every place in [[United States|America]].
<center><gallery>
Image:Lulzgooglemap.JPG|A typical Google Map result.
Image:Googlemapsdomination.jpg|Google Maps gives helpful directions!
Image:Hookerpickup.jpg|Google Maps captures some hookers... Click to enlarge photo...
Image:Kayakacross.PNG|thumb|left|Not included: Car that transforms into a kayak.
Image:Argleton.png|thumb|left|The town that doesn't exist...
</gallery></center>
{{clear}}

===Google Street===
When the Google Van comes to your town, try not to be doing anything illegal or embarrassing. Google now aids criminals, thanks Google.
:'''Notice:''' ED offers a [[barnstar]] to the first troll to spot a kid from the back of a milk carton being waved at to jump in the Google Van.
 

===GooglePlus (Google+)===
{{spoiler|Google+ was finally shut down on April 2, 2019}}
Next Facebook-[[killer]], [[no|supposedly]]. '''{{ytlink|dYdbof039QQ|Click here to learn how to use it.}}''' Nobody liked it so [[YouTube]] forced its userbase to create a Google+ profile. Google+ ended up as a complete and total failure, and became a internet wasteland, but near the end of its lifespan, [[edgy]] [[Autism|Turbo-Autistic Parasites]] decided to take over the abandoned social media platform and communicate in strange [[gay|gay horniness]] and hand flapping. Perhaps they'll move to MySpace now that Google+ is permanently gone.
<center><gallery>
Image:GoogleWantsNewEmail.jpg|[[You]] want to delete your GMail account? Well fuck you! First you must give us your new e-mail address to spam!!
Image:G+ Resistance.jpg|Resistance is futile</gallery></center>
 
===Gmail===
Gmail, short for "Gay Mail" is loved because it doesn't reveal your IP when you send an email, saving you time from having to put on a proxy whenever you email someone you don't trust. But signing up with Gmail is like this:

[[Image:Typical gmail bullshit3.png|center]]

Then after that, 50% of the time you log in to your Gmail account, you have to enter one of Google's [[CAPTCHA]]s for no apparent reason. The above image is one of their more readable ones. Good luck.

And then each week, Gmail will randomly reset your password without informing you or explaining it, forcing you to go to password recovery to enter your account, which again requires one of Gmail's CAPTCHAs. Then once getting into your account, you can clearly see no one else has accessed it but you.

Originally signing up with Gmail only required the software ''Jiffy Gmail Creator'' to read their CAPTCHA because of course no human can. However, as of June 2009: Gmail is only free because they require you verify your cell phone number with them so they can sell it to telemarketers.

[[Image:Wow gmail sucks worse now.jpg|center]]

Here are the answers to from FAQ above:
{{quote3|
Q: I don't have a mobile phone, can I sign up? 
A: No, you're fucked. Sorry Wait, NOT! 

Q: How do I know my phone can receive messages? 
A: If you don't get a text message from us, then no it can't. 

Q: Will it cost me money to receive the message? 
A: Probably or else it'll use up one of your allowed free text messages. 

Q: Why is my country not available? 
A: Because we are only set up to do this for the USA not motherfucking China. 

Q: Will Google keep or use my mobile phone number? 
A: We're Google. We keep your information forever. Seriously, you're signing up for an email service that secretly saves all your emails you delete and keeps it forever, what did you expect? We then use your information for marketing purpose and sell it to advertisers. Expect lots of telemarketing calls on your cell phone while you're driving.
}}

Until 2009, logging into Gmail was like the image below and there was no way to set it for basic HTML default so each time logging in you have to wait 2 minutes, get this screen and then click the link:

[[Image:Loading gmail.png|800px|center]]

If you made an account before Gmail began extorting everyone's phone numbers at signup and hence have no phone number in Gmail, eventually at login, Google will say... "Your account doesn't have a phone number and despite you knowing the password, secret question and answer, and more we're not sure it's you. But if any random person gives us their phone number, we'll give them access to your account."

[[File:Gmail lets anyone hack anyones account by giving out a phone.png|center]]

Clicking the "Ask Google for help" button goes through a series of screens where they demand the exact day of account creation, exact last day you signed in, and exactly correct spelled email addresses of five people on your contacts--ensuring no one will be able to get it all correct and in the end Gmail says, "Information does not match". And with Gmail, it's impossible to reach an actual human there for help. If you have a dynamic IP address, you're fucked as google will rape you with this message every time your IP changes.

[[File:Google is shit.JPG|center]]
Forgot your Jewgle password? Tell us what services you use and when you signed up. Oh wait - you can't remember? - well, fuck you then...
<center>[[Image:Gmail sucks shit.png|thumb|center|Oh, the irony.]]</center>
 
===Google Phone===
Sometime in the fall of [[2010]], Google added a webphone feature to gmail. Fortunately for the population of Nigeria, [[hacker]]s and the [[lulz]], this phone always displays the number 760-705-8888 on caller ID.

Among other nefarious purposes, it was immediately employed by '''{{wikilink|Advance-fee_scam|fraudsters}}''' to call victims anonymously, claiming they had "won prizes from Victoria's Secret" if only they could pay a processing fee. An amusing page of [[NORP]]s complaining about calls received from the number can be found '''{{archive|rRjyp|here}}'''.

Naturally, we at [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] would be [[shocked and appalled]] if you used this knowledge for evil.
 
===Google Buzz===
{{archive|ndobm|Google Buzz}} was the [[almost raped|supposed]] [[Twitter]]-[[killer]], [https://searchengineland.com/google-with-buzz-we-failed-to-appreciate-that-users-have-different-privacy-expectations-36522 and we all know how well that turned out].

===Google Earth===

Just like the real Earth, only inhabited by Lilliputians. And pornians. It was created JUST for [[Osama bin Laden]]. [[Srsly]], it has a realistic flight simulator for flying planes into buildings. An excellent tool for picking out your next rape/stalk/murder victim. Currently Google Earth also has Mars and Moon models. That means that, some day in the future, the Mooninites and Martians can do the same shit us Humans can do. Google Earth also has horrible graphics, which makes anything that you want to find, look for, or even fap to nearly impossible to make out. You could search "The United States of Americunts" and find a picture of what looks to be a land mass of two donkey's fucking.
[[Image:TerroristIgnignokt .jpg|thumb|center|That's right - he can see you!! Thanks, Google...]]
 
===Google Chrome===
[[Chrome]] is a Web 2.0 compatible web browser. It's similar to a shiny metal dildo, but not quite as useful. However, it's an excellent reference for [[troll|trolling]] the hell out of [[internet tough guys]] who still use [[Firefox]].

===Google Ultron===
[[Google Ultron]] is the web browser softwarez that [[NASA]] uses, and is also powered by [[Adobe]] Reader.

===Google PhoneBook===

'''<strike>Google PhoneBook''' is the best tool to [[Internet stalking|Internet-stalk]] the [[pr0n]] models you dream of inseminating in order to keep your genes in the gene pool.

It's simply the best [[Internet|e]]-gift [[Google]] has given to the e-public.</strike> '''{{archive|WHW1e|It's gone.}}'''
[[Image:Googlephonebook.png|thumb|center]]
 
===Google Fight===
If you have no social life, then Google Fight is just what you need. You type in two searches, and Google will see which one has the most results. Only used by [[retard]]s and the lowest of the low. It is reported to be highly unfunny and produce zero lulz. Should one use Google Fight for more than an hour, they might not make a funny joke for weeks to come.
[[Image:googlefight.jpg|thumb||center|BUT I CREATED YOU!1!!![[oneoneone|oneone]]]]
{{clear}}
===Google Sketchup===
Lets you to draw a pretty [[picture]] of your house, and [[upload]] it to [[The_Google#Google_Earth|Google Earth]], in order to make your [[Internet stalking|Internet stalker]]'s job easier. You can [[troll]] by making a model that looks like [[goatse]], such as <s>[http://sketchup.google.com/3dwarehouse/details?mid=716471aadb2bfbea42a05c802e8cf0bc this]</s>. (dead)

Makes shitty polygons with way too many divisions.

[[Shit]] games like [[Facade]] were made in Google SketchUp

Sometimes confused with Google [[blood]], though it is not the same thing.

===Google Groups===
Through various boring developments, Google Groups lets you search [[Usenet]] posts dating back to 1981, and yes there actually was an [[internet]] then. There was drama then too, although reading [[flame war]]s about cold fusion or the projected release date for ''[[Star Wars]]'' movie is only so interesting.

===Google Video===
[[Google Video]] was once your one stop shop for [[Mentos in diet soda]] and softcore webcam porn videos. Designed to give people the opportunity to become [[Internet celebrities]] by sharing dispensable videos of themselves, be it "jackass" stunts or your own unfunny music video parodies in spectacular 8 bit clarity, it has devolved into something so much less. [[Old memes]] that were never funny to begin with inevitably make it onto the fabulous {{wayback|http://video.google.com/videoranking|20060415184114|title=Top 100}}. Composed of conspiracy theories, 15 minute long ''[[World of Warcraft]]'' pvp videos and 37 variations of [[Mentos in diet soda]], this list shows just how trashy people really are. Sadly, after Google's takeover of [[YouTube]], Google Videos is rumored to have [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|DELETED FUCKING EVERYTHING]] in favor of YouTube, and Google tried to keep people away by no longer [[buffering]] the entire video and only buffering 5 seconds of video whereafter Google Video then gives up and dies. In 2009, Google Video shut down the ability to post/upload new vids to the service '''{{archive|xVl7|See Google Video developer blog}}'''. Eventually, the entirety of the content on Google Video got the perma-shoah from Google, and Google Video hasn't existed as a video-hosting-service in any way, since it was officially closed on August 20, [[2012]] - '''{{archive|bHG0u|Citation here}}'''.
{{clear}}
===Google [[Promised Land]]===
[[Image:Free Hat Google.PNG|thumb|The Google equivilent of [[wikigroaning]] - plenty of sites about [[South Park]] and very few about the serial killer himself.]]

Google video hosting website which evolved a feature set extremely similar to [[JewTube]]. It remains less established than its competitors. It features social networking and a "[[ED]] [[Argent]] filter" which works by lying to the person uploading the video if the content is for mature audiences only. It also features the ability to select a video's thumbnail icon, select from a variety of custom channel templates, add an in-line video player to a channel, block critical users from participating in a channel, restrict video comments to "friends" of the channel, refer a video to popular social bookmarking sites like del.icio.us and [[digg]], and attach videos-replies to video comments. Unlike competitors Revver and [[YouTube]], its for white trash only. The Promised Land does not display advertisements, because it will eventually be bought out by [[Google]].

===[[Knol]]===
This new service is totalllyy gonna kill [[Wikipedia]]. See the [[knol]] [[article]] for more details.

===Google Checkout===
Is a payment system that eBay banned because it's a competitor with PayPal. If you take Google Checkout payments for eBay auctions and then get suspended on eBay, Google Checkout automatically refunds every single buyer who has ever paid forever, making you lose all your income for the last several years. If you have negative balance, Google drains your bank account. Google Checkout also requires your social security number so they will come after you for what your bank didn't have.

===Google Quick Draw===
An experiment in AI was revealed and released to the public by Jewgle some time in late 2016. Basically, you get 20 seconds to draw an image based off a word the experiment provides you. Trolls found out about GQD. This is the result:

{{cg|'''Google Quick Draw Experiment'''|gonewrong1|center|<gallery perrow="4">
File:GQD1.png
File:GQD2.png
File:GQD3.png
File:GQD4.png
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="4">
File:GQD5.jpg
File:GQD6.png
File:GQD7.jpg
File:GQD8.png
File:GQD9.png
File:GQD10.png
File:GQD11.png
File:GQD12.png
File:GQD13.png
File:GQD14.png
File:GQD15.png
File:GQD16.png
File:GQD17.png
File:GQD18.png
File:GQD19.jpg
File:GQD20.jpg
File:GQD21.png
File:GQD22.png
File:GQD23.png
</gallery>|}}

===Google Web Accelerator===
Google Web Accelerator is a denial of service attack tool that allows you to visit a website even on a slow connections and then in seconds Google will pre-catch the entire site, even if you no longer read it. Google Web Accelerator also will not pass on the prefetch header for webmasters to block it. If you see ED saying how they're running out of money due to heavy traffic, now you know why.

===Google Wave===
[[Image:GoogleWaveV.png|thumb|Google Wave being announced at the Google I/O conference.]]

{{Quote|"Everything's shiny, Cap'n. Not to fret." Unfortunately, you need to ''refresh''. Wanna tell Dr. Wave have happened?|Google Wave telling you that you're [[doing it wrong]].}}

After the launch of [[Google Chrome]], the Google world executives needed a way to promote their new problem and tear [[Internet Explorer]] to shreds. One executive suggested created a new web standard that IE could not handle, but another executive reminds the [[OP|original proposer]] that W3C already attempted this by creating [[HTML|HTML]] 5 and [[CSS]] 3. The OP then suggested reinventing something everyone knows and loves and making it incompatible with IE, and thus '''Google Wave''' was born.

[[Image:GoogleWaveMaxthon.png|thumb|left|Google dislikes your preferred choice of browser.]]

Google took a few of the already popular communications tools out there ([[Email]], instant messaging, [[chat]], collaborative software, etc.) and merged them together with the power of real-time in order to create what they hoped will be the next killer app. Unbeknownst to most readers, [[you|you're]] using 60-year-old technology. Email is something [[grandma]] makes in her kitchen in remembrance of [[Holocaust]]. What would happen if Email was invented today? Google Wave, of course.

[[Image:GoogleWaveUsability.png|thumb|Google Wave and usability.]]

Google Wave is the big word amongst techfags. Everyone wants their hands on this. Unfortunately, Google is only giving previews to a limited audience. As a result, techfags will do anything for them. Millions of people have filed requests, but it takes months for them to be accepted. Three people have been reported to have died from the anticipation. Fortunately, those lucky few who were invited have at least 8 invitations to hand out. High demand, low supply, and zero taxes meant profit, so people with invites to sell turned to [[Ebay]]. Five people were believed made [[rich and beautiful]] through Ebay sells alone.

{{Quote|Surf's out, dude. Google Wave is down for maintenance. Time to chillax.|Google reminding you that this is only a preview.}}

Google Wave has received a low score on usability. Users find it hard to use or difficult to learn how to use. Fortunately, this problem can easily be remedied:

<blockquote>
HI. [[Billy Mays|BILLY MAYS]] HERE. AND BOY DO WE HAVE A NEAT PRODUCT FOR YOU. MANY OF YOU HAVE COMPLAINED ABOUT THE NIGHTMARISH DIFFICULTIES OF LEARNING TO WAVE. BUT NOW YOU CAN PUT THOSE NIGHTMARES TO REST.
WE ARE NOW OFFERING A '''{{archive|BRYv0|GOOGLE WAVE MANUAL}}'''. COMPLETE WITH MAPS, CHARTS, AND IMAGES. THAT'S RIGHT, BY READING [[OVER 9000]] PAGES, YOU CAN BECOME A WAVE EXPERT. GUARANTEED OR YOUR MONEY BACK.
NORMALLY $29.99, BUT IF YOU CALL RIGHT NOW, YOU CAN GET IT FOR $19.99. THAT'S A $10 SAVINGS!!!!
REMEMBER: WHEN IN DOUBT, [[RTFM]].
</blockquote>

Unfortunately, Mays died soon after creating this commercial and the confusion continued.

[[Image:GoogleWaveOut.png|thumb|This is what I've been waiting for?]]

;Steps
#Create an application that is incompatible with IE.
#Use a name ''[[Firefly]]'' [[fanbois]] would recognize.
#Create 80-minute video.
#Release previews to a limited number of people and create hype.
#[[????]]
#[[PROFIT]]!!!

==Google Plus==
[[File:mwgp2.jpg|600px|center]]

Google Plus launched in June 2011 and was nuked in April 2019 because nobody was using it. It was a social networking website which was a clone of [[Facebook]]. That is, a nave for various web activities such as [[blog]] following, instant messaging and link sharing. All which is interconnected with your friends, relatives and some guy you met once and never is going to meet again. Google Plus was foremost made in mind of that one colleague and relative who keeps spamming your inbox with links consisting of [[shit no one cares about]]. It is for this reason Google Plus had a [[Circlejerk|''Circles'']] function. It made it possible for you to divide all the people that share you boring links into different tabbed categories of your choosing. You yourself could name them. You [[win]] by creating the category [[Crap]], and put everything shared to you under that tab.

Google's plan with Google Plus was to create an universal web account. And it would not be surprising if they succeeded considering the undeserving masses can't keep track of their web accounts. However, this [[Circle jerk]] software had not become a [[killer|killer app]] as of December 2013. Therefore Google has taken action. When you send emails, there was a "Add to Google plus button" for whom you are corresponding with. This gave the false impression that they had a Google Plus account, but in reality you inadvertently sent them an invite to Google Plus. People in your Google Contacts (An Internet synchronized phonebook used in browsers and smartphones) appeared in Google Plus as Google Plus users. Here they tried the same tactics of giving the false impression that people had a Google Plus account when they don't. Google also made it obligatory to have a Google plus account to upload and comment [[Youtube]] videos in November 2013.

[[File:Mouth Cum.gif|thumb|right|Google is known for forcing Google Plus down the throat of its user base.]]
[[File:mwgp.jpg|thumb|right]]
[[File:gplus3.gif|thumb|right|From a google plus users perspective]]

====The things you could do on Google plus====
*Add people on circles
*Arrange people as files and folders
*Remove people from circles
*Add them to other circles
*Make complex circles
*Create new circling models
*Add circles to other circles.
*Measure the circumference of circles.
*Update your name
*Delete google plus
*Backup all your pictures on google servers because it has unlimited space.
*[[Copypasta|Copypaste]] quotes and get extra points, you can use your points to buy e-items later
*Give pluses to everyone and wait for them to suck your cock someday.
*Scroll up and down
*Ignore posts
*Join hangouts and listen to the echo traveling through unlimited number of computers
*Play [[Gaming|gaemz]] which are designed for 12 year olds.
*Click '''see comments''' and let it fill your page with 500 comments.
*Send chat messages your friends who accidentally got online on google chat while reading their emails.
*Log out
*[[Kill yourself]]

====Explore Tab====
Like any other social networking website, the number of fatass bitches who uses google plus for getting attention from adult male population (a great catch = $$$) is exponentially increasing.
Typical posts which make its way to your explore tab are:
*Totally useless inventions which will never be manufactured.
*Advice - See [[advice dog]], also, advice here is like, bad advice with einstein pictures attached to it.
*Posts by profiles of [[Einstein]], [[Jesus]] and [[Barack Obama]].
*[[Cancer]] and reposts
*[[Delicious Cake]]
*[[Photography]]
*Tech News, moar like, phone ads in disguise
*Women sharing videos of women interviewing women.
*More quotes - [[Copypasta]]
*Posts by profiles like "Funny Jokes"

====How to get the most from google plus====
*[https://plus.google.com/u/0/downgrade/ Click Here]
*Select "Delete your entire Google profile
*Click "Remove selected services"
*Ignore all warnings and click OK/Next/Whatever until it shuts the fuck up.
*[[????]]
*[[PROFIT]]!!!

==Google Chrome Frame==
[[Image:GoogleWaveBrowser.png|thumb|[[X? In my Y?|Install Google? In my browser?]]]]

'''Google Chrome Frame''' is an [[Internet Explorer]] plugin from Google. It transforms IE from a Trident browser to a Webkit browser. The plug-in is pointless since you might as well install [[Firefox]], [[Google Chrome]], or [[Safari]]. Nevertheless, it does its desired job: forcing IE users to use a Google product. Anytime, you will be met with a window telling you to install Google Chrome Frame, forcing users to convert to Webkit every time you wish to test out Google Wave. This is yet another attempt to I am in your base killing your d00ds.

==Googledork==
A Googledork is, according to '''{{archive|eWCm5|Johnny Long}}''', "An inept or foolish person as revealed by Google." More specifically, it's a person (usually a Web administrator) who mistakenly leaves or posts sensitive information (or homemade/officemade porn) on a Web site for Google's site scrubbing robots to find, and thereby, discloses private data (and bits) to the Google hackers of the world. If you leave private data (or porn) lying around in public, you shouldn't be surprised when someone finds it and reads it. 

==Breaking Google==
[[image:Evilgoogle.jpg|thumb|Malware? In ''my'' Google? It's more likely than you think!]]

[[At least 100]] years ago, it was told by the gods, that if you were to type ''Google'' into Google you can actually break the internet. The effects of typing Google into Google are devastating, and cause the Google servers to [[divide by zero]].

And we all know how that will end. To circumvent this problem, Google engineers have taught Google to think that it is actually [[Yahoo]]. [[Some argue]] that if Google learns how to order its spiders to ignore robots.txt, it will be able to use Google Earth to learn that it is really Google. The [[RAGE]] that ensues will probably result in Google dropping [[dox]] on all of its masters, such as the kind of [[furry]] they need to dress up as to get free lunch and how many [[CP]] links they have bookmarked in Google Chrome.

===O-shi!!!===
[[Image:Google fuck up.jpg|thumb|left|The day /b/ shat themselves.]]

On January, 31, 2009 at approximately 10:15 A.M., Google determined that every site in the fucking universe was harmful to your computer. Yes, even Google.

The Google supercomputer became self-aware and flagged every website including itself as harmful to your computer. Millions of bricks were shat around the world as people tried desperately to remember how the fuck to type a url into an address bar themselves instead of just Googling the first few words of it.
{{clear}}
===Google becomes an [[oldfag]]===

On April 22, 2009 the self aware system that is Skynet trolled all of /b/ by hiding the Triforce in its main theme photo. Most dismissed it as a troll and or Photoshop. Some speculated that some faggot who works with The Google told it that it couldn't do one and so it then promptly proved said faggot wrong.

{{center|[[Image:Googlewut.jpg|thumb|center|Google Triforce Conspiracy!11 lol]]}}

{{clear}}
==Google Employee Culture==
Google is well known throughout the world as leaders at enticing skilled teenagers and twenty somethings to move to the south bay and work like a dog for $30,000 a year. While you could be making 80k to 120k elsewhere, you give it all up for the privilege of working at Google. Whenever you wake up from the Matrix you have been connected into and end up getting a real job, you'll realize that future employers don't give a fuck how you did it at Google - they want your honest opinion. Of course, you don't have one because the Google NDA knowledge extractor removed that when you left.

Some employee perks include:
*Living with 12 other people in a 1-bedroom apartment in Sunnyvale.
*Free breakfast, lunch and dinner, you [[fat|fatty]].
*[[Randi Harper]] does not work there (yet).
*Free rides in the Google [[AIDS]]^H^H^H^HShuttle.
*They do your laundry, you dirty fuck.
*Due to a NDA that rivals the [[NSA]] and [[Oprah]], you can't talk about what you work on.
*"20% time" can be spent on [[4chan]], [[LiveJournal]] and [[Chatroulette]].
{{clear}}

==Employee fuckery==
{{quote|The secret wage-theft agreements between [[Apple]], Google, [[Intel]], [[Adobe]], Intuit, and [[Pixar]] (now owned by Disney) are described in court papers obtained by PandoDaily as “an overarching conspiracy” in violation of the Sherman Antitrust Act and the Clayton Antitrust Act, and at times it reads like something lifted straight out of the robber baron era that produced those laws. Today’s inequality crisis is America’s worst on record since statistics were first recorded a hundred years ago — the only comparison would be to the era of the railroad tycoons in the late 19th century.|--{{wayback|https://pandodaily.com/2014/01/23/the-techtopus-how-silicon-valleys-most-celebrated-ceos-conspired-to-drive-down-100000-tech-engineers-wages/|20220626073630|title=HA HA HA}}}}
{{quote|if you [Brin] hire a single one of these people that means war.|--Steve Jobs demanding that [[Sergey Brin]] help him break Federal law}}

==The Final Boss of Google==
[[File:Eric_schmidt_peekaboo.jpg|thumb|“These are not the droids you're looking for”]]
Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google, embodies the creepiness that Google admires most. He regularly shows up on news programs once a week spouting a new gaffe about Google's secret quest for world domination.
<center>{{frame|{{morphquote|Ericschmidtquotes|background-color: white; width: 600px; height: 200px;|font-weight: bold;
|We know where you are. We know where you’ve been. We can more or less know what you’re thinking about.|Eric Schmidt
|If you have something that you don’t want anyone to know maybe you shouldn’t be doing it in the first place.|Capt. Moralfag at your service
|Every young person one day will be entitled automatically to change his or her name on reaching adulthood in order to disown youthful hijinks stored on their friends’ social media sites.|[[wat]]
|Streetview the cars we drive only once, you can just move, right?|Eric Schmidt
|Our policy is we try things, we celebrate our failures.|
|You can trust us with your data.|
|I ACTUALLY think most people don’t want Google to answer their questions, they want Google to tell them what they should be doing next.|
|We are willing to get it one way or another, with or without deal.|Eric Schmidt wants your [[facebook]]|
|}}|border=blue|background=white}}</center>

==Gallery==
{{cg|[[Just Google It]]|googlegallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Swastikashapedbuilding.jpg|Proof that Google isn't run by Jews
Image:Google pwnage.PNG|Typical search results.
Image:Cereal_sex_offender.jpg|Another highly accurate service from The Google.
Image:NigGoogle.jpg|OH SHI- THE black person GOT GOOGLE!
Image:Luther.PNG|Another highly useful service from The Google.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:AmericanPlanesAttackNazi.gif|Jews sent reinforcements! MAN THE HARPOONS!
Image:Justin_bieber_google.jpg|Google knows what you had in mind
Image:google trolling.jpg|Google makes it easy to troll their "quality team".
Image:Googlegaga.png|Isn't it cool how Google actually gives you suggestions no matter how offensive to public figures they are?
Image:Gfail Beta.jpg|[[Fail|Gfail]]
Image:Gfail.gif|Even Moar Gfail!
Image:google_1964.jpg|Old school Google
Image:Futuregoogle.jpg|In the future, Google will organise your brain.
Image:Greengoogle.png|Finally Google has a decent logo. To bad it's only for one day.
Image:Google triforce.jpg|Lol wut?
Image:GoogleWhatFail.jpg|Strawberries!
Image:Googleisracist.jpeg‎|Google doesn't trust the blacks.
Image:Lolgoogle.jpg| Google knows what scares you.
Image:thateffinggoogle.png| If I see That Fucking Google one more time...
Image:G_ana.png| Now
Image:How to google.jpg
Image:Jewgle.gif|Jewgle
Image:Google.jpg|Googletits
Image:Seems legit.jpg|Headquarters
Image:Google_-_Classic.jpg
Image:Google_-_Hey_Google.jpg
Image:Google_-_Uses.jpg
Image:Eric_schmidt_by_rware-d3af5db.jpg
File:Why does google.PNG
File:Why do men women google.PNG
File:Why are google.PNG
File:Selfishness is google.PNG
File:Egotism is google.PNG
File:Google1998.png
File:GoogleWave.png
File:Googlelogo.png
File:Problematic_Google.jpg
File:Google_Paris_Hilton.jpg
File:GOOGLE .jpg
File:Accept Gmail.jpg
File:Obama clickbangpop adv.gif
File:Google_Company_info_page_2011.png
File:Google-maps-murder.jpg
File:Google-sandbox.jpg
File:Google-swastika.jpg
File:Google.gif
File:GoogleEDresults.jpg
File:GoogleProphecy.jpg
File:GoogleUFO.PNG
File:Google_Logo.jpg
File:Google_logo.jpg
File:Google Diversity Muslim Massacre.jpg
File:Google Diversity Jewish Overlord.jpg
File:Googlebomb1.jpg
File:Googlecreepy.png
File:Googlecynre_edited-1.jpeg
File:Googled_your_mom_hat.jpg
File:Googleshares.jpg
File:Googletranslate.png
File:Googleview_kenny.png
File:Googlewtf.JPG
File:Wikijudaism.png|Indexing one site is "piracy"...
Image:Yhbtyahoo.jpg|but Indexing two sites is "building the technology of tomorrow".
File:Googlism_internets.JPG
File:GoYgle.png
Image:Thanks google.gif|Google, the friendly, helpful search engine.
Image:Google founder Sergey Brin in drag.jpg|Google founder [[Sergey Brin]]. By the way, that's actually a guy. That thing on his head is a foreskin, probably.
Image:Billyshakes ghettostyle.PNG|Google's counterpart, [[Gizoogle]], can be just as high-brow and educated, as is demonstrated with this fine work of Shakespeare: tizzle be tha question.
Image:Google supports rape.png|thumb| Google will help you learn how to [[rape]]
</gallery>}}

==Conclusion?==

<center>{{frame|<youtube>zkRuUNWcJdY</youtube></center>
<center>'''Google is full of shit'''}}</center>

==See also==
*[[Skynet]]
*[[Android]]
*[[Australia]]
*[[Bing]]
*[[ChaCha]]
*[[Chrome]]
*[[Cloaking]]
*[[Cpedia]]
*[[DMOZ]]
*[[Gizoogle]]
*[[Google Killer]]
*[[Google Stadia]]
*[[Googlesux]]
*[[Google Ultron]]
*[[Googlewhacking]]
*[["Just Google It"]]
*[[kgb]]
*[[Larry Page]]
*[[Missing White Womyn Syndrome]]
*[[Pokémon Go]]
*[[SEO]]
*[[Sergey Brin]]
*[[The Church of Google]]
*[[Tom Galloway]]
*[[TV Tropes]] - A website for spergs that sold its soul to their Google overlords a long time ago.
*[[Verizon]]
*[[Google Translate]]

==External links==
* [https://techxplore.com/news/2022-06-google-wikipedia-content.html#:~:text=Wikipedia%20has%20inked%20a%20partnership%20with%20Google.%20Google,to%20strike%20commercial%20deals%20with%20other%20web%20companies. Wikipedia ("none for profit foundation") and Google sign business partnership... they will molest 16 year old girls and 16 year old boys together especially at [[wikimania]]s!!!]]
*'''{{archive|e2ElJ|Getting banned from Google.}}'''
*'''{{archive|UCCZQ|Jimbo Pedophile Wales will destroy Google.}}'''
*[http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/technology/8533695.stm Italian court convicts three Google executives in a trial over a video showing a teenager with Down's Syndrome being bullied]
[https://www.googlefight.com/ Google Fight, compare everything according to the google result counts.]
*[https://lmgtfy.app/?q=Gizoogle&l=1 "Let me Google that for you"]
*{{UkrED|Google}}

 
 

{{Business}}

[[Category:Sites]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]

Wikipedia

2026-01-22T23:29:56Z

Yooco: reworded

{{achtung|1=
{{{!}}
{{!}}-
{{!}}Wikipedia does not want you to know how many views the "Nigger" article gets! [https://archive.today/2025.09.08-135146/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info See for yourself!]
{{!}}[[File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png{{!}}upright{{!}}x70px]]
{{!}}-
{{!}}}
}}
<center><div>[[Image:wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|1100px]]</div>
<div>{{morphquote|ahfuckicantbelieveyouneedauniquecsselement|background-color:#FFF;|font-weight:bold;
|They even have this policy, it's WP colon DICK, it's called '''don't be a dick''' and it's fucking hilarious because '''they're all fucking dicks'''|[[hipcrime]]
|Dear Wikipedia readers: We are the small non-profit that runs the #5 website in the world. We have only 150 staff but serve 500 million users, and have costs like any other top site: servers, power, programs, and staff. Wikipedia is something special. It is like a library or a public park. It is like a temple for the mind, a place we can all go to think and learn. To protect our independence, we'll never run ads. We take no government funds. We survive on donations averaging about $30. Now is the time we ask. If everyone reading this gave $3, our fundraiser would be done within an hour. If Wikipedia is useful to you, take one minute to keep it online and ad-free another year. Please help us forget fundraising and get back to Wikipedia. Thank you.|TOW begging [[Jews]] for their [[Jew golds]].
|And you will never find a more wretched hive of pseudoskeptical, atheistic scum and villainy. We must be cautious.|With apologies to Sir Alec Guinness
|Great idea, wrong species|E.O. Wilson (on communism, but he meant Wikipedia)
|Verifiability, not truth|Wikipedo's content policy. It's okay to cite a supermarket tabloid as proof, provided you do cite it.
| [W]ithout the content[,] Wikipedia is just Facebook for ugly people[.] |Iridescent, Wikipedia administrator, 2015-07-31<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20231216202028/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia_talk:Requests_for_adminship/Liz&diff=next&oldid=673901499 Wikipedia talk:Requests for adminship/Liz: Difference between revisions, 2015-07-31]</ref>
}}</div></center>
[[Image:720px-Illustration of anal bead use svg.png|thumb|right|Vectored TOW porn. That means they spend time tracing over the lines.]]
[[Image:Wiki-fisting.png|thumb|The kind of [[shit]] you find on TOW. {{wikilink|Fisting|Added at Jimbo's /r/}}]]
[[File:Wikipedia wobble.gif|thumb|BULLSHITTING INTENSIFIES]]
[[File:Multiple orgasms using foreskin.mp4|thumb|right|The penises of many Wikipedia administrators are unable to do this, so they [[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|use Wikipedia to promote cutting it off]] so they can feel less inferior. ]]
[[File:Stephen Pruitt - 5 million Wikipedia edits, 0 sex.jpg|thumb|Meet the Wiki-pedo-ian with the most edits. 6 million Wikipedia edits, 0 girlfriends followed by koafv aka JUSTINE ANTHONY KNAPP/KRAPP!!! ]]

'''World of Wikipedoia''', also known as '''''that other wiki''''' (''T.O W.''), '''the Internet's sacred cow of knowledge''', '''holy orb of knowledge''', '''[[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|the circumphiles' paradise]]''', '''Mr. "I am always right"''', '''the Internet's self-appointed gatekeepers of information'''<ref name=wikipee />, '''Wikipee'''<ref name=wikipee>[https://www.michaelzwilliamson.com/cms/index.php/18-general/556-502 The Massive Failure That Is Wikipee - Michael Z. Williamson (21 July 2019)] - </q>The deletion of the page ended my writing career, destroyed my awards, drained my bank account... Oh, wait, no, it did nothing whatsoever. Utterly fucking irrelevant. Which pretty much sums up the failures who've appointed themselves gatekeepers of what is "credible" or "notable." Easy enough: go to google. There are 69,800 google hits for my name. If only it was 70,000, they might care...<q></ref>, '''Ministry of Truth'''<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Dig Deeper]</ref>, or '''Wikipedia''', is a radical left wing propoganda website disguised as a blog and is justified by other radical left news pages from [[mainstream media|corrupt media]], which they refer to as "reliable sources".<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml#sources Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Reliable sources - DigDeeper]</ref> It is considered an "encyclopedia" and the best of [[humanity]], proof for to how the absolute [[mental retardation]] has contaminated the entire [[world]] population. Editiors plagiarize other people's work, they twist the words around and they boast how they are smart with new article creation or article "improvement."
Let it also be known that the first article on Wikipedia was for Afghanistan, reinforcing the idea that Wiki-pedo-ia is popular among the sandnigger pedophile community, another reason why ''not'' to use '''TOW'''.

Wikipedia also is a [[MMORPG|massive multiplayer online role-playing game]] in which some [[geek]] braggarts compete to paraphrase [[TL;DR]] information into a shorter, reader-friendlier format. However, unlike any other MMORPG, the major rewards and upgrades are to players' perceived expertise on their own edits, which players can trade in for sparse IRL recognition or can add to their [[no life|sparse lists of personal accomplishments]].

During gameplay, Wikipedia players can gain more authority as they progress, with "Administrator" and "Double-O Licensed" rankings granting them access to GOD MODE. While the rules for winning the game are a tightly-kept secret, it is believed that the winner is treated to a night of accolades and praise from Wikipedia overlord [[Jimbo Wales]].

Had Wikipedia not been infiltrated by propagandists and circumphiles long ago, it would at least be an attractive target for them.

(There's also pieces of an "encyclopedia" buried in there, among the articles about [[anime]] fanboy crap and [[football]].)
__TOC__
{{clear}}
==What is a Wiki? An Example of Supreme Idiocy==
[[Image:Wiki-dictatorship.png|center|800px]]
 
[[File:USS liberty - the final solution.png|thumb|"Verifiability above truth, and Israeli propaganda before either"]]
[[Image:Semfaceani.gif|thumb|Not-so-subtle [[racism]] on the '''{{wikilink|Facial_(sex_act)|facial page}}'''.]]
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Requests_for_arbitration/Charles_Darwin-Lincoln_dispute|Edit war dispute}}'''. A full out tribunal complete with e-court and e-arbitration and extra special e-punishment. The users are serving their e-sentences with 3-year bans and Wikipedia-style "house arrests" in which they cannot edit certain articles and must behave in a certain way. The entire argument stems from the fact that Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln share a birthday. This resulted in huge [[lulz]] for everyone else but none for them, while Wikipedophiles got all [[emo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident|Talk page about USS Liberty}}''' in which [[Jayjg]] attempts to argue with the vice president of the USS Liberty Veterans Association about the Liberty incident. Yes, '''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident/Archive_2#Hopefully_something_to_be_quickly_resolved_...|an Israeli agent involved in the cover-up}}''' is allowed to always have the last word on the article, not someone who was actually there and involved in the events in question.
*People who think that Wikipedia can love them back are always easy to troll. Case in point: '''{{wptl|Vanboto}}''', who discovered that a few people guarded the article on the song "Rock Lobster" with a passion, reverting all edits which tried to insert the fact that it was once played on ''[[Family Guy]]''. His response: a brave and bold display of insanity, petty reverts, harassment, personal attacks, irrelevant responses, and trolling. In short, clearly admin material if not for the fact that he was obviously there to have fun and not contribute in any meaningful way, as evidenced by his constant references to ''[[Fresh_Prince|The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air]]'', ''[[Dungeons & Dragons]]'', and ''[[Pokemon]]''. End result: a permaban and much drama. That'll do, [[troll]], that'll do... on the other hand, trolling wikipedos who think they're the "keymaster and gatekeeper" of articles is most necessary.
*The courageous protectors of Katie Couric have decided that citing [[South Park]] makes their [[butthurt]] and so it's OK to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/w/index.php?title=User_talk:87.69.176.81&diff=287041938&oldid=287022906 call people useless dicks and tell them to go fuck themselves]. To those who suffer from amnesia, [https://southpark.cc.com/video-clips/1cgdy1/south-park-crap-verification here is the clip] that angered these [[faggot]]s and made them call the [[Waaaambulance]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Hot_dog|The discussion page for the article on Hot dogs}}'''. It's about <s>10</s> '''38''' pages long and filled with drama. About HOT DOGS.
*[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?search=wikipedia+vandalism&title=Special%3ASearch&profile=advanced&fulltext=1&ns0=1 Certain searches] mysteriously "failing"
*'''{{wikilink|William_Shatner's_musical_career|William Shatner's musical career}}'''
*[[John Seigenthaler Sr.]] - Exposing the Kennedy assassin.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Feces/archive1|Their pants-wetting terror of poop}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Semen|A bitchfest about an image of semen}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Child_pornography|Talk page about Child pornography}}''', their favorite subject. [[Wikipedos]] argue that the [[CP]] article needs moar CP plox. For further lulz, check out the archives.
*Wikipedia is somehow controlled by both the far right and the far left wing political parties at the same time, creating a paradox, without any lulz.
*A place to '''{{wikilink|Talk:Mudkip/Archive02#Anti-mudkip_bias|argue about discrimination against Mudkips}}''', while providing images showing how one can keep [[Mudkip]]'s fin erect.
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:LAME|WP:LAME}}''' contains a full list of Wikipedia's dumbest content disputes - including full-out edit wars over everything from the height and weight of [[Street Fighter]] characters, whether the title of [[Avril Lavigne]]'s hit single "I'm with You" should have a capitalized "W", the cup size of a female ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' character, to whether or not Daffy Duck fathered any children, and more - yes these were all real edit wars, [[srsly]].
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Songs_about_Wikipedia|A collection of fan-written songs about Wikipedia}}''', most of which are stolen from well known popular songs (ex. "Doncha' wish your Pedia was Free like Me?" - ripped off from a Pussycat Dolls single).
*What could possibly be more useful than '''{{wikilink|Category:Living_people|a nine-trillion page category comprising an alphabetical list of all Wikipedia biographies with subjects who are currently still alive?}}''' Because obviously you can't trust the individual articles themselves and so this list is bound to be more up-to-date and reliable, not to mention convenient.

==History==
[[Image:No to Wikipedia.png|thumb|right|170px|Say NO to '''Wik ipedia'''. Do not be tempted into the "encyclopedia" for the [[Poverty|poor]].]]The Wikipedia game originally began as a plot to streamline the [[plagiarism]] of college essays.

Said plot was evil, so naturally, a [[Jew]] was involved. Once the Jew realized that tricking narcissists into self-indentured servitude was an easy way to profit, he immediately began a campaign to turn all Google users into "contributors" to the full-blown cut and paste orgy of his design.

The encyclopedic aspect of Wikipedia began as a butthurt reaction to its more popular predecessor, Encyclopedia Dramatica. Over time, Wikipedia began to feature more and more interesting topics like the lives of 17th century rabbis, characteristics of the 57th termite chromosome, and Hollywood films including one or more of the ''Sesame Street'' Muppets - in other words, content with no real relevance to internet culture. It now also functions as a limited medical journal (which is useless to its contributor base) and criminal resource for retards.

TOW players, however, got a bit headstrong about the actual value of their contributions, and even the Jew conjurer himself began to think of it as the 21st Century's Library of Alexandria. Indeed, this sustains the standard ''modus operandi'' of Wikipedoes, Jews, Liberals and all who believe that re-writing pre-written facts garners respect from people who can't tell the difference and don't give a damn.
{{clear}}

==Progression through [[the Game]]==

{{morphquote|morphquote|background-color: white; margin: auto;|font-weight: bold;
|Pseudo-scholarship (from pseudo- + scholarship) is a work (e.g., publication, lecture) or body of work '''that is presented as, but is not, the product of rigorous and objective study or research;''' the act of producing such work; or the pretended learning upon which it is based|'''{{wikilink|Pseudo-scholarship|Do go on...}}'''
|Pseudohistory is akin to pseudoscience in that '''both forms of falsification are achieved using the methodology that purports to, but does not, adhere to the established standards of research for the given field of intellectual enquiry to which the pseudoscience claims to be a part, and which offers little or no supporting evidence for its plausibility.'''|'''{{wikilink|Pseudohistory|Tell me more...}}'''
|'''You do!''' Yes, anyone can be bold and edit an existing article or create a new one, and '''volunteers do not need to have any formal training.'''|'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Who_writes_Wikipedia%3F|"Who writes Wikipedia?"}}'''
|Wikipedia is written largely by amateurs. '''Those with expert credentials are given no additional weight.'''|*cough* [[Essjay]] *cough* '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:About#Strengths.2C_weaknesses.2C_and_article_quality_in_Wikipedia|"Strengths and Weaknesses of Wikipedia"}}''' (it doesn't say whether this is a strength or a weakness)
|In Wikipedia, verifiability means that anyone using the encyclopedia can check that the information comes from a reliable source.|So why do you pretend to be an encyclopedia, when you've admitted that you're just a link-farm?
}}

===How the Game Typically Progresses===
#You make edits to articles
#Your edits get reverted by [[aspie]] [[fucktard]]s
#You revert them back and they in turn revert again
#You bicker on the talk page of the article
#You whine about the aspies on the administrator noticeboards accusing them of being uncivil, they in turn accuse you of assuming bad faith
#You open a Request for Comment on their behavior
#You take them to arbitration
#Someone gets banned forever, normally the most sane person
#[[Jimbo]] profits

===Grinding===
You grind by writing articles in a concise, yet obtuse way. This is achieved by ignoring copyediting rules and flavor your material with unwarranted sesquipedalianism (If you did not have to look up this word [[you]] are probably... See! The insulting remark appeared in your head! No one even had to spell it out for you!) It was rumored that by 2020 Wikipedia:s user base will be replaced with Google Paraphrase, a software in development.

===Leveling up===
Each time someone complains to you on your user page, you have gained a level. This is easily achieved, since everything you do will yield complaint: both constructive work and vandalism.

===Player versus player===
How to go player versus player in Wikipedia.
#Remove a raw addition to an article which you easily could have fixed or replaced yourself, and which really does not do any harm. In the very least, it could be used as a pedagogical example for newcomers how an article ''not'' should be written.
#Write an essay on the talk page explaining why the addition was removed citing a lot of so called policies, guidelines and essays. Ignoring the fact that said rules, guidelines and essays was not created to stop newcomers, but to help them understand how Wikipedia works, and also was created to stop dickheads like yourself.
#Get your reversion contested.
#Initiate a voting game for how the issue should be handed.
#An administrator who is the [[judge]] in the voting games, rules in your favour despite the outcome, because he will never thwart the effort of a fellow avocation aficionado bureaucrat, despite how stupid [[you]] are.
#Run amok removing things over the whole site, citing said voting game as if Wikipedia was a court room.
#PROFIT!

===Gaining Experience Points===
*1 vandal reversion = 1 exp (a ''vandal'' is defined as an editor with a different point of view than yours)
*1 legitimate edit to a page = 2 exp
*1 article created (assuming it stays) = 20 exp
*1 Good Article = 100 exp
*1 Featured Article = 200 exp
*1 report to AIV or UAA = 5 exp
*1 page deleted via AfD = 20 exp
*1 page deleted via PROD or CSD = 10 exp
*1 support for an [[Rfa]] = 20 exp
*1 article with POV or misinformation inserted into = 100 exp
*1 user blocked as a result of drama created = 50 exp
*1 instance of getting a page blocked = Over 9000 exp

===TOW Ranks===
*Rollback > 10,000 exp
*Pending changes reviewer > 15,000 exp
*Template editor > 20,000 exp
*Administrator > 100,000 exp
*Bureaucrat > 500,000 exp
*Checkuser or Oversight > 500,000 exp

==Why it's Generally a Huge Bucket of [[Pelican Shit]]==
[[File:Wiki lolrus.jpg|thumb|Yu hav no buket becos it is not in the nuspapers!]]
[[Image:AEdunk.jpg|thumb|Encyclopædia Dramatica once again breaking its balls to 1up Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Allthegoodnames.JPG|thumb|135px|All the good names are taken...]]
[[Image:Wikipedia article Lucas 2.5.png|right|thumb|Articles about [[memes]] aren't allowed, but things like this are???]]
{{quote|If I told you [[I Has a Bucket|I had a bucket]] and showed you the bucket, would you ask for a newspaper article to prove I had a bucket?|[[bucket Seal|210.9.136.63]] (talk) 12:53, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}{{quote|Yes. Yes, we would. That's the way it works on Wikipedia.|Jew (talk · contribs) 12:57, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}
Currently Wikipedia contains [[over 9000|4.8 million]] [[English]] articles, 4.8 million of which are [[Plagiarism|plagiarized]] from [[ED]], [[Britain|Encyclopedia Britannica]], or [[Futa]] sites. After edits from various [[moderator|admins, editors,]] [[trolls]] and [[vandals]], only 343 articles remain at least 50% factually accurate. This leaves Wikipedia on an academic par with "[[Star Wars]]: Incredible Cross-Sections: The Ultimate Guide to Star Wars Vehicles and Spacecraft" and "My First Book of Animals from A to Z". All reputable universities and high schools have permabanned the use of Wikipedia in academic citations.

Wikipedia has a policy that all articles in it needs a [[NPOV|neutral point of view]], but in reality it is a doublespeak that basically means "Write in a pro-[[communist]], pro-[[Israel]], pro-[[Liberalism]] view", which is the exact reverse of neutrality. No wonder all the [[SJW]]s, Jewish Activists and [[Narcissist]] power maniacs are attracted to it.

Wikipedia has a concept called WikiLove and has a policy of "[[Ass|ass-u-me]] good faith" amongst its contributors. This is a vital policy because there is no good faith among any of [[Wikipedos]], so it is necessary to at least pretend that the other guy isn't out there to be an asshole.

Wikipedia's new March 2007 rules demand that an administrator proves he has a higher (PhD) degree if he [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/03/12/technology/12wiki.html claims] he has one. So far that [[bullshit]] [[lie]] to the public has not been enforced.

Wikipedia has very weak armor and only a level 3 shield. Thus, they are open to a flanking attack from pretty much anybody. And since they have about eighty updates per second, it's easy for a small but fatally incorrect change to slip through unnoticed. Also, Wikipedia is quite prone to [[hivemind]], since everybody wants to be an [[admin]], and disagreeing with Wikipedia admins is an easy way to not become one.

The [[administrators]] of Wikipedia are generally open-source advocates and therefore tend to have no knowledge of how to run a successful website. They are constantly arguing with each other over how often the [[GNAA]] Wikipedia article should be nominated for [[VFD|Articles for Deletion]] section, disregarding the [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines]] which prevent multiple attempts. They delete the important sites, but keep the [[bullshit]]. Like: '''{{wikilink|Fart_lighting|Fart lighting}}'''.

Actually, the only thing in which Wikipedia [[fap|beats]] [[ED]] in is a higher percentage of [[vandal]] users. For a prime example, see: [[Sceptre]].

Contributors to Wikipedia are not valued. Bimbo Wales has said that editing is a privilege, so you are not really donating your time by editing articles. Most contributions (images, text, etc.) are actually [[deleted]], and the users with the most power ([[Administrators]], Bureaucrats, etc.) contribute the least content to the site. The site is so [[shitty]] that it is pointless to try to improve it. The best way to fix it would be to just delete it and start over.

{{squote|Wikipedia is a stalking mill designed to stroke the egos of social reprobates and other fringe groups who don't belong in [[normal]] society. The people who are there long term and essentially live there for the most part fit the profiles of true sociopaths.

[[Jimbo Wales|Wales]] developed a great gaming system on Wikipedia which he uses to attract the dregs of society -- people who don't have lives are who aspire to be "famous and great" are [h]is marks and he's come up with a rat maze to lure in the stupid, lonely, and ignorant.

I've been famous and in the public eye for what now -- 15 years? I have to say, power, fame, and attribution are overrated. There's a simple wisdom is simply accepting who you are and being happy about it. None of the psychos on Wikipedia seem happy, it's a perpetual [[war]] zone and highly competitive. But what eludes all of them is the [[cheese]] at the end of the maze -- there is none -- just the smell of cheese.

Wales and his cronies just [[whore]] all of these idiots through their "Wikigame" (The site is an online gaming system essentially -- see who can get to the end as an "[[Admin]]" or "Arbitor"). Wikimedia then cashes in on everyone's hard work.

When was the last time Wales took one of his admins to get a massage in a russian house of ill repute on Wikimedia's dime? But HE DOES.

Bottom line, its a bunch of morons being used to run his business for free, while his cronies back at the Wikimedia offices cash in on everyones hard work and pay themselves 300K+ salaries per year,{{citation needed | date= July 2013}} divert and misappropriate the funds and live the good life by living in fancy hotels and eating fancy meals while the rest of the stupid schmucks live in their mom's basement or their trailer parks in New Jersey and Alabama while Wales and his cronies cash in on YOUR HARD WORK.

It's got to be the second biggest scam after [[Linux]] development. Linus Torvalds has a similar model. Let people "contribute" so they feel good about themselves, while the project and site owners rake in the [[$]][[$]][[$]].|{{archive|Vk4A4|Jeff Merkey}}'''}}
===The Never-Ending Story===
A common misconception is that "Wikipedia is never finished." Remember, each Wikipedia article you come across was forged from the blood of thousands of angsty [[teenager]]s [[edit war|edit warring]] over really important facts about the world.

The real problem with Wikipedia is the Wikipedians. From players to sysops, every member of its community is the scum of the internets - worse than spammers, worse than [[script kiddies]] and [[Nigeria|Nigerian scammers]], and worse than [[IRC]]ers. The average Wikipedia user has the '''{{wptl|122.148.180.50/Archive|intelligence of a seal}}''', and '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Smegma_Penis02.mirrored.jpg|bathes or showers once a month}}'''.

Wikipedia is full of people with no desire to improve what it is intended for, information. Instead, they want to grow their [[e-penis]] and one day become a [[mod]].

The only way to save the Wikipedia [[MMORPG]] is to delete all usernames and only allow two players to be its administrators: [[Grawp]] and [[Willy on Wheels]]. All other accounts will be reduced to powerless IP addresses. Its' users will then continuing their bitching and pedantic arguing. [[Tosh.0|Tosh]] had the right idea: get over there and post some fucked up shit.
{{clear}}
===Reliability===
{{main|Mechanophilia#Legality|Mechanophilia}}
[[Image:Wikipedia-oxymoron-example.png|thumb|right|220px|Example of self-perceived reliability at Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Wikipedia atomic bomb bias.jpg|thumb|right|200px|The good people of wikipedia handle history's most complicated issues with an opened mind and detached objectivism.]]
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>kFBDn5PiL00</youtube>
<center>'''Michael Scott On Wikipedia'''}}</center>
 
In 2007, a variety of scandals began to surface from within Wikipedia. Mainstream news organizations began to openly discuss the common public perception that Wikipedia is "unreliable." In a sophisticated experiment, it was demonstrated googling "Wikipedia" and "unreliable" generated more than 502,000 "hits". In contrast, a similar search using "Encyclopedia Dramatica" and "unreliable" generated barely more than 300 "hits", with most of these being self-deprecating jokes of humility from Encyclopedia Dramatica editors. Thus, it was scientifically proven that Wikipedia is much, much more unreliable (see graphic). Anyone in the world can edit Wikipedia, which means you know you are getting information from the best source possible.
{{clear}}
====Acceptable Sources====
Wikipedia has very strict standards regarding the sources you can use when editing. The following is a list of some of the most common ones.
*[[The Guardian]]
*[[Daily Kos]]
*Huffington Post
*Junge Welt
*KCNA
*PinkPaper UK
*[[Michael Moore]] documentaries
*Countdown, with [[Keith Olbermann]]
*Anything by [[Noam Chomsky]]
*Some stupid [[nigger]]'s asshole
*Anything licked or stolen by [[Jews]]
Additionally, many editors simply cite obscure books that no one owns. That way, no one will ever be able to prove they're totally bullshitting.
{{clear}}

====Pornography====
[[Image:jwales.jpg|right|175px]]
So great is the amount of porn on Wikipedia it (almost) rivals [[ED]] - a [[fact]] made all the more pathetic by the fact ED is made by and for [[basement-dwellers]] and those with a disgusting sense of humour whereas Wikipedia is genuinely trying to educate people.[citation needed] Here is a list of the very full articles dedicating to proving that sad fact:
*<big>[[Wikipedia Porn]]</big>
*<big>[[Wikipedia's Greatest Hits Sex]]</big>
*<big>[[Virgin Killer]]</big> For all you Loli-lovers.
{{clear}}

===WP:Admins control universal truth===
{{main|The Wikipedia Jews}}
Wikipedia mods come trolling the world from the heyday of the page between retards <s>and the search results of [[Google]]</s>. Mankind has been trolled in its entirety by no more than a bunch of anal-[[rape]]d Aspies, who just log in for World Domination. Unsurprisingly, among those interested in world domination are psychological warfare experts from [[Mossad]] and the [[JIDF|JIDF,]] who relentlessly insert [[Israel|Israeli]] propaganda into every article that they can find, and ruthlessly suppress anything critical of ZOG's schemes. The magic of the Electronic Dictatorial Totalitarian Democracy, all in the name of volunteering for the [[NOT|best idea of the world for an encyclopedia]]. Long Live Wikipedia!.
{{clear}}

=== What is "wiki lawyering"? ===
When an administrator or an editor liked by the administrators cites policy, it's considered valid. When an unwanted user cites policy, it's "Wikilawyering" or "bludgeoning", regardless of the validity of the arguments, so it can be dismissed and tossed down the moat.

=== Inconsistently applied policy ===
Wikipedia deletion policy states subjects have no say on the deletions of their own articles.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Criteria_for_speedy_deletion#Non-criteria Wikipedia:Criteria for speedy deletion § Non-criteria] (as of December 18, 2023)</ref> As so often on Wikipedia, policy is not applied consistently, making it pointless.

In this example, [[satanism|satanist]] [[Michael Aquino]] was able to request the deletion of the article about himself. [[Guy Chapman]], then an administrator, considered it a valid reason.<ref>[http://archive.today/2016.11.30-051001/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Michael_Aquino&oldid=232504731 Wikipedia:Articles for deletion / Michael Aquino (archive 2016-11-30)]</ref>

<gallery>
File:Exemptions from Wikipedia policy - Michael Aquino deletion.png ‎ | (Click to expand)
</gallery>

===Hivemind===
{{main|Wikipedia Admin Gallery}}
[[Image:Wikipedia1984.gif|thumb|right|220px|A satirical GIF that [https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?title=Special%3ALog&page=File%3AWhambo_in_%2784.gif was censored by Commons' kindness brigade]. "Porn = Good. Satire = Bad."]]
[[Image:Wikimania stallman keynote2.jpg|220px|thumb|right|[[RMS]] loves Wikipedia. No other commentary is needed.]]

[[Wikipedophile]]s, especially [[sysops]] and recent patrollers, share a hivemind. They all think alike, act alike, and no matter how abusive a member of the hivemind is, they always support it. Those of the hivemind look like they are [[sock puppet]]s, but they actually communicate telepathically.

In 2005, like a colony of bees, the hivemind recognized that those outside the collective had their own individuality. Now they are a complete collective consciousness like the Borg and no longer believe identity exists outside the collective. To them, everyone is fake, an illusion; an actor who has no thoughts, emotions, viewpoints, etc. and must be eliminated/assimilated and until then they do it is viewed as [[trolling]]. Any expression of individuality is [[banned]] as trolling or, to use a common wikipodadminism, "disruption." See: [[Don't feed the trolls]] and '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Don't_Feed_the_Divas#How_to_deal_with_a_Wikipedia_Diva|Don't Feed the Divas}}''', especially the last sentence, which crushes what little self-esteem you may have:

<center>''"In some cases, the diva will stay retired, '''but the loss will be quickly filled by other editors who are not so high maintenance; editors for whom the goal is not self promotion and validation, but rather improvement of the project."'''''</center>

The hivemind extends outside Wikipedia as well, on those rare occasions that an admin strays onto another forum. A good way to start a [[flamewar]] with them is to hint, suggest, joke, outright state or otherwise insinuate that Wikipedia is anything less than the greatest academic achievement since the library of Alexandria.

Thus, because of the Hivemind, Wikipedia has immunized itself against any criticism. Of course, the corollary to this immunity, according to themselves, is because so many people are part of it, it can't be controlled. Due to the amount of participants, real criticism will come from inside. Yeah, that'll happen. Criticize the Hivemind at your own peril, because the Hivemind controls the power to delete your edits, to ban you, and to railroad you from social advancement (as [[SlimVirgin]] did to Gracenotes).

*When ED criticized Wikipedia, ED was site-banned in their '''{{wikilink|MediaWiki:Spam-blacklist|"spam" blacklist}}'''.
*When Wikipedia Review criticized Wikipedia, the Monkey-Fucker Cabal removed all links under some kind of definition of "no personal attacks".
*Wikipediocracy published [https://wikipediocracy.com/2013/02/26/russavia-is-scott-bibby-is-russiansafetycards/ a blog entry] about how [https://www.roger-pearse.com/weblog/2013/03/12/dishonesty-at-wikipedia-they-dont-like-it-up-em-sir/ fucked-up] Wikipedia is, and was [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MediaWiki%3ASpam-blacklist&diff=543691461&oldid=542603600 stuck on the "spam blacklist"].
*"Real newspapers" like ''The Register'' criticize them, and the chant goes out "[https://lists.wikimedia.org/pipermail/wikien-l/2007-July/077064.html Ban them, ban them, ban them...]"
*Watch out ''New York Times'', [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/01/magazine/01WIKIPEDIA-t.html you're next].
{{clear}}
====Recent Changes Patrolling (RC Patrolling)====
{{main|Recent changes patrol}}
[[Image:Paranoid.jpg|thumb|200px|The average recent change patroller is infected by the [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|USI]]-virus.]]
Why the fuck would anyone want to patrol for recent changes? The articles are usually dull. Patrolling edits on Wikipedia is [[boring]] as hell. The only reason is to [[troll]]. Cuckolded administrators delete everything believing they are cyber judges (though [[IRL]] judges at least pretend to follow a set of rules) after their wives have refused to touch their cocks. (Just kidding, 80% of the fat little bastards aren't married and never will be. Lol.) If you actually attempt to post facts on Wikipedia and an RC patroller doesn't like it, they will use any sort of retarded excuses to revert or just call it vandalism. Failing this, they will attempt to make your argument invalid through the power of [[some argue]].

RC Patrollers usually use scripts to search for specific things. They're actually very bad at catching vandalism in articles ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MONGO&diff=prev&oldid=67472921 this one] went unnoticed for 17 days and '''{{archive|h6Bfu|this}}''' went unnoticed for ''two'' years!), but very effective at finding anyone criticizing admins in talk pages where such criticism is reverted and the person banned forever. Real vandalism lingers and festers until years later, that account pisses an admin off - and it is only through [[wikistalking]] that [[Pedobear|Wikipedophiles]] are able to find [[vandalism]] at all.

Some RC Patrollers are also huge [[hypocrite]]s because they are also vandals. These [[fake editors]] include Konstable and [[Blu Aardvark]].
{{clear}}
====The Asperger Cancer====
{{main|Asperger's Syndrome}}
[[Image:Anders-behring-breivik_bawwww2.jpg|thumb|[[Anders Breivik]] has an edit reverted. ([https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/norway/9209392/Anders-Behring-Breivik-my-tears-were-for-Norway.html 2012])]]
Any observant new user to Wikipedia will soon ask themselves "What's with all the running 'lists' of inane bullshit? I don't need to see a list of Russian deep fat fryer models built in 1963. Why are the administrators social misfits with little sense of wisdom or good judgement? Does Jimbo know of this [[faggotry]]?" The answer to both questions is that Wikipedia attracts [[Asperger]] zombies like flies to [[shit]].

These basement dwelling [[virgins]] have alienated millions of [[normal]] people from Wikipedia. They take out their [[asperger]] [[rage]] for their hundreds of school yard beatdowns and permanent sexual isolation on the rest of us. It is believed that many of these [[faggot]]s ''cannot even talk'' in real life. Jimbo can't stand these robots, but their problems are harnessed by Wikipedia as unpaid labor, which makes the [[profit]] for his [[hookers and blow]].

[[Asperger]] [[zombies]] are relatively easy to spot. They will be:
*[[White]], and male.
*Have their photo on their user page. Asptards have little sense of what is socially appropriate, and don't realize how '''{{wpul|H2g2bob|they come across}}'''. They mainly have '''{{wpul|J.delanoy|blank, asperger stares. This perma-virgin actually has a picture of himself with Jimbo}}'''.
*Their user page will be covered in checklists, "to do" tables, programming code, personal details, and generally look like a spreadsheet. Look at [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:MBisanz&oldid=338235254 this] fucknut's older page version, before he knew ED was looking and had found the ''"I fuck on the first date kid"'' all grown up (scroll down).
*Sometimes, those on the asperger/autism spectrum will openly declare their problem. '''{{wpul|Rainbowofpeace|"Rainbowofpeace"}}''', who obsessively edits articles about discrimination, helpfully tells us how he is an autistic gay Jew with ADHD. That's a high score on the ''[[Tumblr|Oppression olympics]]''!
*Favorite subjects include [[men's rights]], which were fought over constantly on TOW from its early days, and [[GamerGate]]. Because real human females won't talk to Cheeto-gobbling pimply 300-pound fans of Tolkien and [[My Little Pony]].

{{userbox
| border-c = #00000f
| id = HIV
| id-c = #000000
| id-fc = #ffffff
| id-s = 13
| info = '''This user has [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger syndrome]].
| info-c = #808080
}}
{{clear}}
====Notable Wikipedos====
{{main|Bureaucratic Fucks}}
*[[Ironholds]], former WP:IRC rockstar, now desysopped for [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Human_penis_size&diff=prev&oldid=46470687 vandalism] and for bringing the project into disrepute with such quotes as:
{{quote|[19:58] <Ironholds> You should however have instead taken your pen, punched a hole in her windpipe and looked on as her attempts to wave for help got increasingly feeble.}}
*[[ArbCom|GorillaWarfare]], one of his galpals
*[[Fluffernutter]], famous for her sexchats with Ironholds:
{{quote|<nowiki>19:59:11 < Fluff|laptop> you'd think he'd have figured hiow to slap asses by now, but nooo</nowiki> 
19:59:51 < tyw7> why is he slapping your ass? 
20:00:00 < Ironholds> tyw7: we're fucking 
<nowiki>20:00:02 < Fluff|laptop> why not? we DID say we're bored</nowiki>}}
*[[Tyciol]]
*[[AmericanDad86]], known for fighting everyone and being [[Gay|flamboyant]].
{{clear}}

=== Circumphilia - promotion of circumcision ===
[[File:Wikipedia guessing game.png|thumb|Can you guess which of these three paragraphs appeared on Wikipedia in 2022?<ref name=doesNotAffect>{{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision#Sexual_effects|20221030002924|title=Circumcision § Sexual effects - Wikipedia (October 30, 2022)}}</ref> ]]
[[file:wikipedia-benevolent-2040.png|thumb|In 2040, they will want you to forget all about it.]]

People hate what they can't have.

A significant portion of [[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|the people who get to decide who is allowed to edit]] had [[circumrape|the foremost part of their sexual organs cut off]] early in life, and secretly wish they had been allowed to keep it. However, they know that the day they will wake up as whole men with foreskins will never come. Therefore, all that is left to them to cope with their lack of foreskins is to deny the importance of the part they are missing, so they can feel like they don't miss out on much and inflate their confidence.

One of the most egregious [[:category:circumphiles|circumphiles]], the [[virgin|sexless]] [[basement dweller]] [[Jayjg]], was promoted into the [[Arbitration Committee|wiki kangaroo court]] in 2005 by no one less than the founder. Why would the founder do the dirty work with his hands if basement-dwelling low lives are willing to do it for free?

As one would expect, Wikipedia transformed into a circumphile spam machine over the following years. It would not take long until other circumphiles were promoted into positions of authority: Avraham to administrator in 2006 and bureaucrat in 2009, [[James Heilman]] to administrator in 2010, and Zad68 to administrator in 2013.

Whereas Wikipedia used to mention that foreskin is "a highly sensitive part of the penis" in 2004,<ref>{{wayback|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision|20040605200550|title=Circumcision - Wikipedia (June 5, 2004)}}</ref> anything negative about circumcision was quietly purged over the years. Wikipedia even went even as far in 2022 as to claim that circumcision does not affect sensitivity at all.<ref name=doesNotAffect />

[[File:Wikipedia circumcision 2004 2022.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Because this embarrassed Wikipedia, they had to switch coping strategies in 2023 to complicated mental gymnastics: ''"Circumcision doesn't actually affect sensitivity, it's just the attitude that affects the sensitivity[[oneoneone|!!1!!1!]]"''

[[File:Mental gymnastics to justify circumcision.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Looks like they can't make up their minds.

The administrators who are not circumphiles quietly tolerate the circumphilia.

Besides, what kind of person would have a positive attitude towards having had a part of their body cut off without their approval, especially as a defenseless infant?

[[File:Age of consent for circumcision - 0.png|thumb|center|Age of consent for circumcision: Zero.]]

=== Deletion count contests ===
Some administrators compete for the highest deletion count so they can proudly show it off to their peers on their user page. To inflate their deletion count, they seek any excuse they can find to delete pages. For example:

<gallery>
File:The proudest achievement in the miserable life of W-admin Liz.png|An administrator vengefully deletes over a hundred valid geographical articles because their author was blocked three years earlier over a minor incident.
File:Liz deletion count as of October 11th, 2023.png|Proudly presented on her user page.
</gallery>

Funnily enough, the deletion policy that would later be named ''WP:G5'', deletion of creations by an author disliked by the administrators, was a spontaneous and undiscussed invention in July 2003 by an early Wikipedia administrator, Martin Harper, who also happens to be a circumphile. This means ''WP:G5'' is a circumphile invention.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 Martin Harper invents what would later become WP:G5] ([http://archive.today/2021.05.28-134850/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 archive])</ref><ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 The early edit history of the "Circumcision" article] ([http://archive.today/2022.08.13-161256/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 archive]) shows the circumphilia of Martin Harper.</ref>

==TOW & ED==
{{main|ED vs TOW}}
''See also: [[Wikipedia_Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Encyclopedia Dramatica]], [[ED vs TOW]], and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:ED vs. Wikipedia]]''

[[Image:ED vs Wikipedia.jpg|thumb|left|ED [[OhInternet|had]] [[Tits or GTFO|tits]], therefore [[TOW]]-[[fanboy|fans]] are [[homosexual]]. You'll notice that ED is wearing a hat with a hammer and sickle, the symbol of the glorious Soviet Union.]]
[[Image:Slanderous_WHORES.JPG|thumb|Wikipedia, not biased about ED at all.]]
[[Image:ED on TOW.jpg|thumb|We're back!]]
[[Image:44407e8f.jpg|thumb|Even as a source, they still hate us.]]

It all started one day when [[Jameth]], typing with only his [[cock|penis]], attempted to enter the [[mediacrat]] drama as a Wikipedia entry. It was '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Mediacrat|discussed and denied}}'''. This act alone sparked the creation of the wiki [[you]] are reading right now. Far as you know, you chronic masturbator.

Every year, Wikipedians pretend that they are going to delete the [[Recovered|Encyclopedia Dramatica article]]. '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Occasionally}}''' they do for brief intervals, mostly on the grounds of hosting the previously-deleted [[Mediacrat]] entry, but usually they [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Encyclopedia_Dramatica&action=history wuss] '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|out}}''' of it. The fucks tried it '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica_(6th_nomination)|six times}}''' that are still visible; there were others, vanished by that pathetic anime dork Avery "Ashibaka" Morrow. He hates ED. (And it's extra-lulzy because he was also a major protector of the 4chan article, which was also subjected to endless editwars. But then he was a moderator on 4chan for a long time.....)

Have a look at the '''{{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica/Archive_1|first archive of the ED article talkpage}}'''. There were earlier ones bu the Wiki-faggots deleted them. Yes kids, Ashibaka, Sceptre and Mbisanz are whining little pussies hells yeah.

Wikipedia's steadfast refusal to host an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article has been the source of a great deal of hilarious [[drama]] on the site. Yet [[TOW]] continues to cover up any controversy associated with the topic and deny the creation of the article, even one that is unoffensive, informative, and well written. Wikipedia has articles on [[Bukkake]], [[Goatse]], [[2 Girls 1 Cup]], an extensive disambiguation page on [[dong]]s (including a page on a male [[porn]] star named '''{{wikilink|Long_Dong_Silver|"Long Dong Silver"}}'''), and [[God]] knows what else. However, they have refused to allow a page on [[ED]] simply out of spite.

Update: Last closing argument (aside from [[Sceptre]]'s faggotry):
{{squote|Encyclopedia Dramatica – Reclosing this for the second time. We have a consensus - i.e we want to see an extremely well written draft with impeccable sources before we touch this again.|Spartaz Humbug! 19:54, 3 May 2008 (UTC)}}

<center>
<big>'''[[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|DISREGARD THIS SECTION]], [[TOW]] [[Fellatio|SUCKS]] [[COCKS]]'''</big>

'''An''' {{wikilink|Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Encyclopedia Dramatica article}} '''has been up on Wikipedia, in all its lulztastic, properly sourced and cited glory since''' {{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica|at least May 2010}}.
</center>

As expected, it took only a few hours for many [[Wikipedo]]s to go into childlike tantrums, thus forcing yet another deletion review, deletion review number 57 to be exact. The topic of this deletion review is to determine the validity of sources. When the article was created, the source list was actually larger than the article itself, but this has since been trimmed down for a number of arbitrary reasons, the most prevalent being that TOW's editors are unable to live up to their own retarded rules. However, the overall consensus is that the article should stay and that anyone who says otherwise is a [[hypocrite]] who is simply [[butthurt]] over ED's treatment of [[TOW]] and its editors and fails to realize that this immature behavior will only further the problem.
{{clear}}
====Wikipedia's Content Vs. Encyclopedia Dramatica's Content====
*Wikipedia relies on verifiability, not truth. ED relies on the lulz, and baseless jokes don't make good satire.
*Wikipedia does not rely on primary sources, and hates academic sources. ED would post a photo from your high school yearbook if it's lulzy enough.
*Activists use Wikipedia to skew articles to try to get [[NORP]] sympathy. ED shits on everyone for the sake of cheap jokes.
*Wikipedos will argue by throwing around abbreviations. EDiots will laugh at you and mock your argument.
*Wikipedia lets shitposters like [[Ryulong]] run rampant. ED has no problem telling its own [[Girlvinyl|founder]] to fuck off.
*Wikipedia is almost always online. ED goes down every other day or some shit.
This section needs no witty dick jokes. Wikipedia is a giant punchline.
{{clear}}
===Tips On Vandalizing Wikpedia===
{{Main|Vandal/How-to}}
*Subtly insert false info, such as changing a person's birth date from 1970 to 1990, or insert info that is not obviously false, like: "x was a distant cousin of Bill Gates."
*Make a new account every time you vandalize, so that even if you are caught, the admin can't revert all your past vandalisms.
*Vandalize articles that are not actively watched by a lot of editors, such as biography of obscure living persons.
*Always create an informative edit summary for your edits. For extra points, make up a spiffy character set with nonbreaking spaces...
:*Examples: ▲ ʙ ɮ Ⅽ Ⅾ ∈ Ⅎ Ғ Ɠ ╠╣ℍ █ ▄█ K █▄ █▀█▀█ █▀█ ●  ℙ ☭ Ⓡℙℝ ▄█▀ ▀█▀ █▄█ ▀▄▀ █▄█▄█ ✖ 匕 ▀█▄ ● ❛❜ This will help your edits look super respectable!
{{clear}}
===[[Power Word|Power Words]]===
Employ the following words to increase your wiki [[bullshit|credibility]]:
*'''{{wikilink|Camel_notation|CamelCase}}''' - Sticking two words together to form the silhouette of a [[vagoo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Antisemitic_canard|Canard}}''' - some sort of Jew bird that eats fetuses and desecrates churches.
*Good faith - A codeword for the [[13 year old boy]]s for which wikipedians are on the prowl.
*[[Portmanteau]] - A sexual device used by wikipedians to have buttsecks regardless of gender or disability.
*Schism - A euphemism for a [[catfight]].
*Shoa - a mythical tale of an effeminate mustachioed hero who defeats a horde of greedy beasts.
*Admonish - To tie up and make gay manlove with the one that doesn't have complete faith in the Church of Jimbo.
*Redact - To run circles around a pole until exhaustion
*Coatrack - A maniacal stick use by wikipedians to hang their coats on.
*Disambiguation - A process whereby someone who is unsure about their sexuality undergoes painful gender reassignment surgery.
{{clear}}
===<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{wikilink|Template:Unblock|Unblock}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>??===
[[Image:Howtobanappeal.png|thumb|{{Unblock}<nowiki>}</nowiki> hard at work.]]
This is template you use to ask to be unblocked. After you've been blocked for no reason, you swallow your pride and ask that someone undo it. You then wait for an hour until some 15-year-old denies your request without even looking at it. Sometimes, if you insist arguing, they will block you as well from editing your user talk page, without banning you, for their own private [[wikipedo]] "[[lulz]]". At that point you can only appeal the block by email (which they will probably ignore as the jerks full of themselves they are) which can/will eventually be blocked as well.

If you get banned by an admin don't even bother using this because no matter how well-reasoned the <nowiki>{{unblock}}</nowiki> request, it always gets declined. Like <s>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User_talk:81.153.223.189&oldid=142952978 this one]</s> (dead): ''"HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A TROLL M0RESCHI YOU STUPID BASTARD! AFTER WHAT YOU FUCKING DID YOU DESERVE TO BE SHOT!"'' Clearly the person has proven their point, but the [[bureaucratic fuck|bureaucratic fucks]] are immune to reason or logic. If your request is declined, you may get a lame reason.

Whenever you edit on Tor and the node is blocked, always put an unblock message on that IP claiming it's no longer Tor. Sometimes they even get fooled. Admin said, "First time I've seen such a request where the user was telling the [[truth]]."
====Zaiger's <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> Request====
For absolutely no good reason, ED's own [[User:Zaiger|Zaiger]] was given [[ban|life with no parole in Ban L&]] by the ban-happy cockz at Wikipedia.
{{quote|You have been blocked indefinitely from editing for abuse of editing privileges|Lies}}
In one last fighting breath, Zaiger submitted an appeal using the <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> template to try and parole out, but to no avail.
{{quote|What I see here is you trying to blame someone else for your own problems.
...that doesn't mean that you are automatically pardoned for your own bad behavior.|Wikidouches}}
Thankfully, no one cares about Zaiger.
{{clear}}
===Easy [[eBay]] Profits: Admin Farms===
{{main|eBay}}
[[Image:Damn furries wikipedia.jpg|thumb|410px|right|A [[wikipedophile]] put this up on Jimbo Wales's talk page to complain about [[admin abuse]] by [[furries]] in kangaroo suits (look nearly real, don't they?). Jimbo avoided the discussion with a [[banhammer|banning]].]]

While shouting "op me" is an easy way to become an op on IRC, in Wikipedia it takes a little more work (but only a little more). The purpose of becoming an admin is to sell your account on eBay. ([http://wikipediareview.com/lofiversion/index.php/t204.html 2006])
#Make a new account using dial-up or AOL, not proxies. These are the easiest ways to sock puppet and still use your other accounts for things like removing inaccuracies from Wikipedia.
#Create a user page so you look legit. The easy way is to fill it with [[userboxes]] until it looks like ribbons on a third-world military dictator. If you just copy somebody else's userpage, you will get caught. Then write up a fake bio that says, "Hi I'm only 12 and want to be an admin some day." Most admins on Wikipedia are too young to grow pubes, so you have to be in their age group. They never vote for anyone old enough to date.
#Don't question anything. Behave like a robot. Get one of those anti-vandal scripts and have it auto-revert while you sleep. Always revert: (1) Someone who reverts an admin—if you're lucky you'll occasionally beat somebody else to this (2) IP address users—because these are all vandals and sockpuppets (3) New contributors—because they don't understand Wikipedia (4) Anyone who has ever been banned before, even for an hour, because they're permanently shitlisted. Now don't worry about wrongly reverting any of these people, it happens all the time. Just say it was a mistake. No one in charge likes these people anyway. Learn the abbreviations for policy pages like WP:NPOV and WP:NOT and use them in your edit summaries. Nobody will care whether your usage makes sense. On talk pages, if someone asks a question, tell them that their statement is original research, speculation, and that Wikipedia is not a forum. Act like it is serious business.
#After a few hundred fake edits, go to the [[VFD|articles for deletion]] every day.
#Next, go to votes for adminship; always vote to support, so those people will vote to support you. This should be obvious. Admins like people who support admins and hate those who are critical of admins.
#When you reach 4,000 edits, go to ''requests for adminship'' and nominate yourself: Poof! you're an admin!!!
#Then go to eBay and auction it. Make sure the reserve price is over $1,000 so you don't sell it cheap.
#Until the auction ends, don't just do nothing or they'll know it's an eBay sale. Use the account for things like POV-pushing, banning any of the four shitlisted types you used to only revert (by any, I mean every user you can find). But if you're too busy, just find someone complaining about admins and ban them forever and lock their talk page; actually you have to do this at least once every day, or else somebody will think the admin account was hacked.

'''If you want to keep your account and not sell it:'''
#Get a life.
#If that fails, do the most respected admin activity, encourage vandalism. Vandalism is the only way you can justify your job. If there weren't so many vandals, there would be 4 admins. So get your script out and just ban randomly. Be sure to lock the user's talk page. If you see the user come back on, hide what they write and explain that they are a "sockpuppeting troll", ban them forever, and lock their talk page.
#Don't bother fighting vandals now. You've got the equivalent of a government job: you can't get fired, only transferred. Become a copycat of Willy on Wheels and you'll only get a new account.

'''Fun activities to do as admin:'''
#Mess with the '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:MediaWiki_namespace|MediaWiki namespace}}'''.
#Ban other admins for [[lulz]].
#Replace Wikipedia articles with ED ones. It improves accuracy.
#Unban all the [[Willy on Wheels]] accounts. Or just clear the entire ban list.
#[[Goatse]] the Main Page.

===Heroes===
[[Image:Yourmission.jpg|frame|When dealing with [[Willy on Wheels]], it is [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines|Wikipedia policy]] to take it seriously.]]

All over [[teh internets]], people complain about the bad things of Wikipedia; that they're all child molesters, Homeland Security agents, Zionist propagandists, furries, Jimbo Wales' alter ego is [[GreenRaeper]] (founder of [[WikiFur]]), how official policy permits admin abuse "[[is not a bug, it's a feature]]", and that there are news articles constantly on how they make [[snuff]] films with young boys. But nobody notices the heroes of the site:
*[[The Colbert Report|Stephen Colbert]].
*[[Don Murphy]]
*[[Willy on Wheels]]
*Señor Pelican Shit - /b/rave soldier who researched and documented [[Pelican Shit]] to a new level, a serious concern still affecting Wikipedia.
*Autofellatio Professor - Helped many people '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Autofellatio_2.jpg|Autofellatio_2.jpg}}'''.
*[[Publicgirluk]] uploaded some pictures of herself to illustrate relevant articles and got called a troll by the master [[wikipedo]] wealthy pornographer for her trouble.
*THE MOTHERFUCKING JUGGERNAUT BITCH!! reputed for massive AOL autoblocks.
*[[Blu Aardvark|Jew Aardvark]] Wikipedia Jews masturbate to his photos.
*Squidward, the fastest vandal west of the Mississippi, known for harvesting more open [[proxies]], creatin more sockpuppets than Bomis has porn. He is king gypsy who lives in [[Chicago]] by the lake. He hates Antandrus, Avraham & others <s>[http://antandrus.tripod.com/ as proved by his crappy website</s> (lol down)]. The Wikipedia Jews are always on the lookout to raep him. Slap that foreskin, homes.
*'''{{wpul|Hephaestos|Mike Garcia}}''' - high class of vandalism since 2003 (get a life!) <blockquote>''"He is currently one of Wikipedia's most promising vandals. He appears to be persistent, creative, and knows to vandalize pages that will be seen by many people. One day, he may even be considered in a class along with the great Willy on Wheels, but he will need to "diversify" his vandalism before this can happen. Almost all of his vandalism has been to the English Wikipedia; a good piece of advice to him would be to start attacking admins' user pages on some of the foreign language Wikis. His recent vandalism of the [[Wookieepedia]] shows that he has begun this diversification process already. Mike, you possess a great deal of talent; the sky's the limit for you!"''</blockquote>
*[[Cplot]]--500 [[sockpuppets]] and counting, clowns!
*[[Professor Tim Pierce]] teaches his students how to make the most of a wiki.
*Wikipedia Is [[Communism]].
*That guy who wrote [[Hyldenism]].
*[[Grawp]]
*Avril Troll
*Anybody who has earned a spot '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:List_of_banned_users|here}}'''. (Note that the top list expose the wrath actions from the King himself, to spread fear among vassals)
*Undercover users from here, allied sites.
*[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[Hagger]]
*[[ByAppointmentTo]]
*[[hipcrime]]
*[[Anonymous]] member of [[ArbCom]] who [https://wikipediocracy.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=2832 whipped Wikipediocracy into a fury] when he ''"tried to hack into the site"'' by means of [http://wikipediocracy.com:2082/ following] a [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/account/cpanel redirect] from his control panel to the site's host where he asked for the domain [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/forgot password to be reset]. They were thinking about calling the FBI!

==Wikipedia IRC==
{{main|Freenode}}
The Wikipedia [[IRC]] chat is a fun place to watch [[Wikipedophile]]s discuss criticism of the project while banning the critics, although a more likely discussion will involve eating Christian babies, banning other users to get their rocks off. A fun way to troll Wikipedia IRC channels is to announce that you are logging the channel. For some reason, Wikimediots raise strong objections to the [[GNAA|publication of chat logs]], so be sure to do it often. Just like [[Daniel Brandt]].

And whatever you do, DO NOT LAUGH AT ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA.

===Lulzy IRC===
====One:====
<Slowking_Man> DCC SEND exploit = kline
<-- Slowking_Man has quit (Killed by Rez (This connection has violated network policy.))
<-- WikiTeke has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CXI has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CakeProphet has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- Poore5 has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))

====The only thing remotely funny ever from #wikipedia====
<pre><VegaDark> what's that one disorder called when a person looks like a kid all their life
<mavhk> VegaDark: infant death
</pre>

==Summation==
Generally speaking, Wikipedia is the compendium of all human knowledge, both true and false. Except of course where groups (i.e. [[Furluminati]], [[The Wikipedia Jews]]) go around turning arrays of articles into propaganda and bullshit.

Contrast:
*"Welcome to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit." - Wikipedia front page.
*"[Wikipedia] is not a place where people have the inherent right to edit" - Jimbo Wales, October 29, 2007. ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents/My_desysop_of_Zscout370&oldid=168329048#Public_apology Source])

==Gallery==
{{cg|Wikipedia|wikigallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikipediababy.jpg|Some people never learn.
File:Highesthonor.jpg|The highest medal of honor a TOW editor can hope to achieve after years of "hard work".
File:Wikiwank - terraforming venus.png|Edited by lonely spergs, you say?
File:That_time_Wikipedia_considered_memory-holing_c._m._killings.png|100 million people died from communist mass killings? Nah, who cares?
File:Never forget what they wanted us to believe - Wikipedia 2022.png|Never forget what they wanted us to believe.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Barack obama ns.jpg|Wikipedia is [[racist]]!
Image:George bush bdi.jpg|If wikipedia says so...
Image:Brokenwikipedia.JPG|breaking the format is always fun.
Image:Wikipedia Spanking.jpeg|Typical Wikipedia Articles
Image:SillyWikipedo.jpg|Sometimes it doesn't need to be vandalized.
Image:Typicalwikipedia.jpg|Another classic of pedantic [[Metzizah b’peh|pedophilic]] Jew-oriented gobbledygook
Image:Trolledwiki.PNG|An example of Wikipedia being trolled
Image:WWII_cite_source.png|Citation or it didn't happen.
Image:Whatusuallywikipedialookslike.jpg|What Wikipedia usually looks like.
Image:wikiblock.jpeg|Many ED users are familiar with this page.
Image:Wikifail.PNG|An example of Wikipedia's [[bullshit|superior intelligence]].
Image:wikipediacontent.jpg|Breakdown of Wikipedia content
Image:BNB rules.jpg|Standard Wikipedia policy
Image:Historian.png|Typical Wikipedia user. Note the [[unix beard]]
Image:Angelislulz.JPG|What happens when the Wiki main page isnt protected.....again.
Image:wikipediaattack.jpg|Proof that Wikipedia is full of [[Jews]] and [[Pedophiles]].
Image:Wikipe-tan sockpuppet show.png|[[Wikipe-tan]] is sooooooooo [[kawaii]] [[desu]]! [[^_^|^O^]]
Image:MarkOfAWitch.jpg|unfunny vandalism is not reverted
Image:Lulz_Wikipedia_Donation.JPG|[[Anonymous]] Japanese hit back at racist Wikipedia.
Image:TOW racism1.PNG|[[TOW]] demonstrating their strict gb2nigger policy.
Image:Wikipedia Return to The Kitchen.jpg
Image:Jimbo and Wikipe-tan.jpg| [[Jimbo Wales|Jimbo]] loves [[loli]].
Image:Iluvdrawing.jpg|Wikipedia [[retard|love the mentally challenged]].
Image:Wikipediavirusgames.jpg|[[Cat girl]] [[wikipedos]] invade [[World of Warcraft|MMOs]]! next they e-[[rape]] kidz!
Image:Ned Scott Wikipedia professionalism.png|A genuine beacon of [[e-penis|professionalism]]. Unless you're a [[fucktard|holier-than-thou pretentious asshole]], i.e. 99.9994% of all Wikipedian regulars.
Image:Stfuned.jpg|Professionalism thrown back.
File:911 Wiki Vandal.png
Image:TOW_Motivational_Poster.jpg|'''TOW's''' Mission Statement.
Image:Wikijudaism.png|Revered the world over as an accurate, objective source of knowledge.
Image:Wikipedia_admin.jpg|Good for a [[banhammer|perma-ban]] anytime!
Image:YouHaveTwoCowsWikipediaStyle.jpg|Proof that [[Wikipedos]] are drawhores.
Image:Egg.jpg|This is your brain on Wikipedia
Image:Blocked per Linda Mack.JPG|Say the magic words and it's banhammer time!
Image:DocWPNOR.jpg|You're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.
File:Wikipedialiberals.jpg|Wikipedia has a leftist bias.
Image:Wikipron.jpg|The hottest pron on Wikipedia!
Image:Comparison.jpg|Reliability comparison.
Image:Blackpeopleshouldntbeallowedtovote.png
Image:Hodgemanssf.jpg|The book version of TOW, in addition to being the best thing ever.
Image:Chucknorrisgg1.jpg|Epic Edit!
Image:wikitalklulz.JPG|Editing often leads to sensible discussion on TOW.
Image:Evenwikisays.jpg|Pool's Closed, it are a fact. I read it on Wiki.
Image:Mudkipswiki.JPG|
Image:Wikirule.gif|Masters of their domain.
Image:Barnstarwikip.jpg|Some wikipedia users will do anything for a barnstar.
Image:TOW_originality.JPG|TOW [[divide by zero|implodes on its intellectual property]]
Image:4chanwiki.jpg|Acknowledged by the WikiJews
File:Suckmycock.jpg|Wikipedia sucks cocks
Image:Poundcake.jpg|Wikipedia style guide for esoteric topics
Image:Wiki-Pedos.PNG|Proof that Wikipedia is ran by Paedophiles
Image:Username removed.gif|[[Grawp]], whose username is removed, and then the "username removed" label is struck out for extra effectiveness.
Image:Wikilulz.png|Wikipedia at its best.
Image:Just like wikipedia.jpg|Just like Wikipedia, only 2 out of every 40 "women" are actually female.
Image:EditBragg.jpg|Now [[you]] can make shit up about Pulitzer Prize winning writers - who also make shit up!
Image:BarrackGoebells.JPG|The new president is a black nazi!!!
Image:Cumshotbush.JPG|YES, THATS A CUMSHOT!
Image:Putin.jpg|The russian President
Image:Wikipedia donate amount.jpg|Any penny donation is appreciated
Image:Wikidonationplea.jpg|Nothing is obvious for Wikipedians
Image:Racistgoogle.png
Image:Wikitroll.jpg
Image:Wikihentai.jpg| A 'Quality Image' according to Wikipedia
Image:Wikipedia_Recent_Changes_Spam_Spamming.png | lrn2/wiki newfags
Image:Wikipedia_-_The_Wikipediatrician.jpg|The Wikipediatrician
Image:Wikipedia_-_Your_One_Stop_Research_Stop.jpg
Image:Wiki-deathstar.png
Image:WIKIPEDIA DONATION BANNER SCREENSHOT IRONIC.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA WIKIPE-TAN.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA STEAMER PIX REQUEST.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA KANGAROO USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST.jpg
File:Wikipediaredirectjews.PNG
File:Wikipedialulz.jpg
File:WikipediaNeutralPOV.jpg
File:Wikiwrong.jpg
File:Juno2.png|Wikipedia is about imparting information about important topics!
File:Wikipedia article glenn campbell time i get to phoenix math.png|Cool story, bro
File:Wikipedia feminist propaganda campaign.png|Now imagine how many propaganda teams '''don't''' advertise
File:Wikipedia edit-a-thon hispanic heritage month 2017.jpg|And another!
Image:Gwash.png|Classic. Wikipedia controls Google.
Image:Jackson is dead.jpg|[[Michael Jackson|MJ]] is dead even on Wikipedia.
Image:Wikipedia-lolcat.jpg|[[Redundant|Why Wikipedia is full of shit.]]
Image:Wikipedia cat.jpg|Why the rest of the internet is full of shit.
Image:Wikiwar.jpg|Mychael Styne will boom us all.
Image:Anon loves wikipedia.png|[[Anonymous]] loves Wikipedia.
Image:Waisted.jpg|Anonymous is also a wasted idiot.
Image:Wikibonk.jpg|Finally, Anonymous bonk.
File:Bouncywikilogo.gif
</gallery>}}

==Videos==
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|Wikipedia|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>eaADQTeZRCY</youtube>
;Meet the Professor
|<youtube>_RTirBSmg0I</youtube>
;Some nerd listening to the longest personal name evar
|<youtube>20PlHx_JjEo</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>7dGJDJoeAok</youtube>
;Jewish Internet Defense Force and how to edit Wikipedia}}
|}}
}}
 
'''DONATION TIME!'''

<center><gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|2015
Image:Wikipedia 2017 donation.png|2016
</gallery></center>

==See also==
[[File:Wikipedia demoralization.png|right|thumb|280px|The TL;DR version of this article]]
[[Wikimania]]
*[[Arbitration Committee]]
*[[SuperMemo|Brain (How to funnel all of Wikipedia into your -)]]
*[[CHILDPROTECT]]

*[[ED vs TOW]]
*[[Edit war]]
*[[Hack|Justification (Irrelevance of)]]
*[[Metapedia]]
*[[Poop.mov]]
*[[Racism]]
*[[Psycho|Rulesfag]]
*[[Shit]]
*[[Corruption|System (Global)]]
*[[Wikiwarfare|Warfare (Inter-wiki)]]
*'''Wikis (Other)'''
**[[Conservapedia]]
**[[Illogicopedia]]
**[[Metapedia]]
**[[Uncyclopedia]]
**[[Wikifur]]
*'''Wikipedia'''
**[[Vandal#How_to_Become_a_Wikipedia_Vandal|How to properly vandalize -]]
**[[List of deceased Wikipedians|Users (Deceased)]]
**[[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|Administrators (Gallery of)]]
**[[List of heterosexual Wikipedia admins|Admins (Heterosexual)]]
**[[Wikipedia/Jokes|Humor (Delusion)]]
**[[WP:You have no rights|Your rights (Users)]]

===Villains===
*'''[[Breitbart]] - officially [[No shit|an unreliable source,]] as of [[Last Thursday|October 2018]]
*'''[[The Daily Mail|Daily Mail, the]] - due to Jewbo spooning ''[[The Guardian]]''
**'''For a full rundown see: [[WP:DAILYMAIL]]
*'''[[MONGO]]'''
*'''[[Scientology]]

===Supreme Assholes===
*'''[[Science Apologist]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Davkal]]. Occasionally masturbates to [[science|physics textbooks]].
*'''[[Davkal]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Science Apologist]]. Believes aliens and ghosts control the [[Government]].

==External links==
* [http://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Punjab_(Pakistan)&action=history On Wiki-PEDO-ia it's ok to rape and marry little girls, especially Christian girls, especially in Punjab, Pakistan!!!]
* [https://www.theregister.com/2008/03/03/jimbo_wales_rachel_marsden/ Jewbo rapes Rachel Marsden hard core style, than he dumps her live on wiki-pedo-ia, then in return she sells his shit he left at her place on shitty ebay!!!]
*[https://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Clyde_Bruckman&diff=prev&oldid=9581421 Wikipedoians surely love to talk to themsleves 24/7.... especially psycho stalker felon antandrus (david, homeless bum from santa monica area, CA) and his retarded bastard son XXBlackburnXx]
*[https://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224 The CIA is among Wikipedia's most prolific editors] (Archived: {{archive|56bdL|1}} {{wayback|http://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Facebook|The Faces of Wikipedia users}}''' (98 percent men, 2 percent squirrels) (Archived: {{archive|7awXF|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Facebook|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents|TOW Admin Noticeboard}}''': Your front-row seat at the freak show
**'''{{wikilink|Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|How the Jew Wikipedia describes its own CP scandal}}''' (Archived: {{archive|ydvBE|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|title=2}})
*[https://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html ALL Universities, colleges, schools must ban wikipedia] (Archived: {{archive|8VojN|1}} {{wayback|http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*[http://www.wikipediareview.com/ The Wikipedia Review] - Anti-Wikipedia message board, nearly died in 2012
*[https://wikipediocracy.com/ Wikipediocracy] – The primary Wikipedia criticism website at present. Like it or suck it.
*'''{{archive|GHgD9|Wikipedia: A Techno-Cult of Ignorance}}'''
*[https://www.theregister.com/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem?page=2 Another “flattering” review] for Wikipedia (Archived: {{archive|ZWQKf|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem/page1.html|title=2}})
*[https://www.theonion.com/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-independence-1819568571 "Wikipedia Celebrates 750 Years Of American Independence"] (Archived: {{archive|OPcRp|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theonion.com/articles/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-indepen,2007/|title=2}})
*[http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html Stranger than Fiction: A Wikipedia Conspiracy] (the true story of [[SlimVirgin]]) (Archived: {{archive|6l25|1}} {{wayback|http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Template:Smile|Send a wiki pedo-smile}}'''
*[https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff One of the many unspeakable things that wikipedos fap to] (Archived: {{archive|JApyK|1}} {{wayback|https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff|title=2}})
*[https://www.independent.co.uk/tech/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47-000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9 Meet the 'pedo who has made 47,000 minor corrections of the same grammatical error.] - He insists he has 'a life' (Archived: {{archive|v4kF|1}} {{wayback|http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9|title=2}})
*{{archive|http://www.wikipedia-watch.org/*|Wikipedia Watch}} - Daniel Brandt's true criticisms!!!
*[https://www.avclub.com/the-scandal-of-olivia-newton-john-12-surprisingly-cont-1798214001 "12 surprisingly controversial Wikipedia pages"] - not surprising, if you know how Wikipedos think (Archived: {{archive|StgP8|1}} {{wayback|http://www.avclub.com/articles/the-scandal-of-olivia-newtonjohn-12-surprisingly-c,2201/|title=2}})
*'''A Criticism of the Wikipedia''' - a critical examination of Wikipedia by a [[B&|former]] [[Pervert|user]] Lir (Archives only: {{archive|DDjKo|1}} {{wayback|http://www.kapitalism.net/thoughts/wikipedia.htm|title=2}})
*<s>[http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia Len Osanic vs. Wikipedia]</s> (dead) a case study of the edit wars surrounding [[John F. Kennedy|JFK]] assassination [[Truth|conspiracy]] [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|figure]] L. Fletcher Prouty (Archived: {{archive|iSSWY|1}} {{wayback|http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia|20200111065117|title=2}})
{{Takedown}}
{{mmoseries}}
{{cults}}
{{wikis}}
{{WP}}
{{timeline|Featured article September 22 & 23, [[2012]]|[[Bill O'Reilly]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Adventure Time]]}}
{{timeline|Article of the Now June 13, 14 & 15, [[2022]]|[[Keegan Salisbury]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome]]}}

[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Faggotry]]
[[Category:Sites]]
[[Category:Wikis Suck]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

[[Category:Circumphiles]]
[[Category:Circumcision promoters]]

Cupcake

2026-01-22T22:59:19Z

Yooco: added name

[[File:Cupcake Love Update by PockyPal.jpg|thumb|Cupcake <3]]

'''Cupcakes''' are the favourite food of Bryant Moreland ([[EDP445]]). A cupcake could also refer to:

*[[Cake]] - delicious cake
*[[Cupcake Dog]] - a dog that likes cupcakes
*[[Cupcakes]] - a ''My Little Pony'' fanfic
*[[Topkek]] - a Turkish cupcake

{{clear}}
 

{{foods}}
{{disambiguation}}
[[Category:Food and Drink]]

Cupcake

2026-01-22T22:57:58Z

Yooco: The first thing you think of when you hear "cupcake" any time since 2021.

[[File:Cupcake Love Update by PockyPal.jpg|thumb|Cupcake <3]]

'''Cupcakes''' are the favourite food of [[EDP445]]. A cupcake could also refer to:

*[[Cake]] - delicious cake
*[[Cupcake Dog]] - a dog that likes cupcakes
*[[Cupcakes]] - a ''My Little Pony'' fanfic
*[[Topkek]] - a Turkish cupcake

{{clear}}
 

{{foods}}
{{disambiguation}}
[[Category:Food and Drink]]

Android

2026-01-19T16:32:05Z

Yooco: Every Android developer has to dox themselves to Google now.

{{Achtung|Every Android developer has to [https://archive.today/2025.11.12-042824/https://developer.android.com/developer-verification dox themselves to Google] since 2026, because Google wants to "protect you" as if you were a little toddler. }}

[[File:Android pissing on Apple.png|right]]
[[File:If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.png|thumb|right|If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.]]

'''Android''' ('''[[Apple]]''' + '''[[Steroid]]''') is [[Java]] bloatware built into a disabled [[Linux]] distribution, made for [[mobile phone]] faggots too afraid to sell their kidney for an [[iPhone]]. Starting out in [[2003]] as a dickless Frankenstein, it was made popular after [[Google]] bought the [[copyright|rights]] in [[2005]] and made the [[when you see it|shitbrick]] G1. Android runs on various devices because of their [[open source]] nature (AOSP), with just about any phone by HTC, Samsung, Asus, OnePlus, Motorola and any other non-iPhone mobile devices. It's the 21st century's [[Windows|one-for-all OS]], and the glue holding many markets in a harmonious [[lemonparty|circlejerk]]. It is currently the most popular mobile platform in the world with over 1 billion [[big brother|recorded]] users.

One of the main selling points of Android smartphones used to be the freedom to install applications through APK files ("[[sideloading]]"), which allowed running apps removed from the Play Store like [[Flappy Bird]]. Starting with Android 17 in 2026, all APK files require Google's approval in order to be able to run on your smartphone that you parid for.

==WHO MADE THIS CRAP==
[[Image:DataTNG.jpg|thumb|right| Not to be confused with this android.]]
[[Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg|thumb|250 px|right|Or this one]]

That's easy -- it was a giant hack-job thanks to Andy [[Jew]] Rubin, who started Android Inc. as a separate company and sold it off to [[Google]] in 2005 for a shit-river of cash. Or rather; he hired a few dozen nameless coders who assembled the main codebase, so Andy could claim HE invented it all. After Android created the most popular smartphone OS in history, Larry'n'Sergey gave Andy $90 mil to go away in 2014. Because Andy was fond of [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/technology/google-sexual-harassment-andy-rubin.html shtupping female employees]. He promptly started several other tech firms, [http://playground.global/ one of which] is an "incubator" for new ideas. And that is how to disappear an excess $90 million.
{{squote|What Google did not make public was that an employee had accused Mr. Rubin of sexual misconduct. The woman, with whom Mr. Rubin had been having an extramarital relationship, said he coerced her into performing oral sex in a hotel room in 2013, according to two company executives with knowledge of the episode. Google investigated and concluded her claim was credible, said the people, who spoke on the condition that they not be named, citing confidentiality agreements. Mr. Rubin was notified, they said, and Mr. Page asked for his resignation.

Google could have fired Mr. Rubin and paid him little to nothing on the way out. Instead, the company handed him a $90 million exit package, paid in installments of about $2 million a month for four years, said two people with knowledge of the terms. The last payment is scheduled for next month.}}

==The System==
===Pros===

[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|Google Chrome thinks that the Android Market is a cover for attackers to install [[malware]] on your computer, and they are correct!]]
* Make phone calls. (Unless you have [[AT&T]], then fuck you.)
* Exploit critical/unpatched security holes and act like its a feature. (also known as "[[shit no one cares about|root]]")
* [[Flash|Download additional battery raping security holes.]]
* [http://www.imoseyon.com/ Rape battery raping security holes.]
* Overclock and melt processor.
* <strike>[[Tethering|Tether]] your phone to your laptop to share your phone's [[Internets]] illegally because you're too fucking poor to pay for it. This can be done via USB or WiFi.</strike> <strike>Verizon and AT&T may banz free [[illegal]] [[Tethering|tethering]] [http://bit.ly/r2ZNUy here]</strike> Just root it and you can download an app that still does it for free.
* [[Flash|Play Farmville.]]
* Download shit-grade free apps.
* Download [[TPB|pirated]] apps that MAY CONTAIN <strike>AIDS</strike> [[AIDS|MALWARE]]!
* Customizing your fucking homescreens with widgets
[[Image:ForeverAloneWidget.gif|right|frame|Yes you can download it. [[DO IT]] Faggot!]]
* Download porn apps. (As long as the Parents Television Council keeps their hands off the Android Marketplace!)
* Download Sound /b/oard.
* Install apps remotely with [http://appbrain.com/ Appbrain] so you can fuck things up good.
* Use your bluetooth headphones/Bluesniping
* WiFi / Wardriving like a script kiddie.
* Take photos in the dark. (some android phones have double flash all the way)
* Scan barcodes.
* Live Wallpapers to make your clit hard.
* Use as a big screen TV. (see: Droid X, lol DISCONTINUED)
* Tell Google everything that you are doing. (This can be minimized by turning off "Submit usage to Google" and by not using Google Buzz. Unless you're a FUCKING MORON like 99% of Android users.)
* Buy a fucking piece of plastic to protect the screen from your dirty fingers from Verizon for $15. (WTF?!)
* Flood the Android Market with [[over 9000]] bogus apps that do nothing but show you a couple of images of [[Justin Bieber]] with huge tits, ripped from Google Images; and sell them for 99 cents.
* [http://news.techworld.com/mobile-wireless/3234932/google-android-smartphones-hit-by-trojan/ Download viruses] and make yourself miserable, sucker.
* Pinch to zoom. Like an iPhone diddling pussy.
* Use Google Goggles to solve Sudoku.
* Use Google Goggles to identify fucking everything.
* Play retro video games with [[NES]], [[SNES]], [[SEGA|Genesis]], [[PlayStation|PS1]] emulators and more.
* Use a physical keyboard (on many Motorola and HTC phones). Beware that if you are a [[fatty]] with fat fingers [[nobody cares]] about you or your ability to use a hardware keyboard. (lol DISCONTINUED, all Android phones are fucky iPhone clones now)
* Watch apps crash from [[over 9000]] memory leaks.
* Buy yourself some [[Hookers and blow|hookers and blow]] with the extra money you won't be shelling out to buy an iPhone.
* Laugh at people walking out of an AT&T or Mac Store who will be sleeping in a cardboard box with their Apple Debt.
* Take photos of said [[basement dweller|cardboard dwellers]] as they cry their salty tears into the gutter because they have no home to go to anymore.
* [[CSIII|Make your own apps]]...[http://appinventor.googlelabs.com/about/ CSIII style!].
* Troll Steve Jobs or Tim Cook (if they aren't dead yet).
* Troll [[apple|iPhags]], especially if they paid $1200 for an iPhone Xs.
* Automatic application updates.
* REAL MULTITASKING. Whatever that means.
* Voice Actions using Voice Search. Not only will your phone display all the disgusting [[furry]] porn you talk about all day, it will also report everything back to [[Larry Page]].
* Be forced into using [[Bing]] (root will let you uninstall)
* Sync with Google [[Chrome]]. You have no choice, the phone AND the PC will harass you until you do it.
* [http://www.mobidroid.com/products/dildroid Fuck it.] (lol BANKRUPT)
* [[Freedom]] lolol
* [http://www.zdnet.com/blog/hardware/android-sms-bug-sends-your-messages-to-random-contacts/10796 Send an SMS intended for a chick you're fucking to your girlfriend, your boss, and your grandma without you knowing.]
* Randomly delete all of your messages.
* Reboot for no apparent reason.
* Reboot for no apparent reason during an important phone call.
* Share your authTokens with everyone.
* Destroy brain tissue with the [[Facebook]] app. A billion flies can't be wrong, eat shit!

===Cons===
[[File:G1time2.jpg|thumb|Main promotional photo for the G1, where the clock is set to 2 different times 2:47 and [[9/11|9:11]]. This is thought to be a message from an [[1337|elite]] group of Google engineers tho are desperately trying to get out [[JEWS DID WTC|the truth]].]]
* You can't use it with any [[iPod]] enabled device. Like you would want to anyways, not a big loss there. You can, however, plug it into any standard audio jack or USB port. Something the iPhuck can't do anymore lol.
* Some devices can't be used with a [[Mac]] because it hasn't been approved by your [[Macfag|Apple Genius]], and nothing of value was lost.
* You can't use [[IRC]] on some [[shit|3G]] [[Snugglenets|networks]] that only allow for secure connection. You can however IRC using WiFi or through 3G on browser based clients like Mibbit. You could also be 1337 and [[SSH]] in through a [[UNIX]] server and screen irssi you [[faggot|Mary]]. Nothing is more fulfilling than unleashing the power of [[gay.pl]] while you are driving.
* <s>Install it on an iPhone.</s> <s>[http://www.idroidproject.org/wiki/Status Now you can.]</s> (oopsiedaisy nevermind DEAD PROJECT as of 2015)
* Have an acceptable battery life. (GIANT EXTERNAL brick battery will fix this, and make you look like a cuntboy)
* Have a mediocre battery life. <strike>(Root+CPU manager fixes this)</strike> (lol NOTHING FIXES IT ANYMORE)
* Back up your phone log or text messages. (3rd Party has this covered nao)
* Back up your browser bookmarks (Again, 3rd party has it covered)
* Back up any of the apps you downloaded for free. (Most of the apps that you paid for are remembered. PDANet won't appear in that list because you paid the folks at PDANet not Google.)
* Back up any other data stored on internal memory. (See root)
* Get the guy at the [[Verizon|phone store]] to [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING]] off your old Android phone.

===What you will be able to do with it in the future===

[[File:Gingerbread-zombie-painting.jpg|thumb|[[I, for one, welcome our new X overlords|I, for one, welcome our new Android overlords.]]]]
* Play WebM/HTML5/VP8 games just barely....
* Play music over the cloud without buffering or hiccups (Google is making music to stream over your network instead of using space).
* Use it with Google TV to run your porn apps.
* [[Divide by Zero]] (According to Gizmodo).

==Apps==
{{tinyquote|Give it up, you turd. It's a [[java]] sandbox wrapped in another sandbox.|[[User:h64]]}}

If for some in-fucking-credibly misguided reason you do decide to make an app, heed this warning; you will want to fucking [[an hero|shoot yourself]] half way through.

===Banned Apps===
[[File:Androlf Hitler.jpg|thumb|240px|SIEG HEIL!!!]]

Just like Apple, Google also has a blacklist of apps, although they have yet to blacklist most of the [[shit]] apps that flood the Android Market everyday. Verizon, in particular, doesn't like any app that allows users to [http://www.cnet.com/8301-19736_1-20013244-251.html avoid paying their $20 add on fee for Wifi tethering]. The average Android user is paying about $107 per month for service through Verizon Wireless, so fuck them AND YOU.
* [http://www.unstableapps.com/?p=44 Easy Root] was removed from thew market for stealing the source for the app from DMUpdate, a FREE rooting process.
* Android [[Last Thursday|recently]] decided to [http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/08/13/google-quashes-pro-hitler-android-apps/ remove a slew] of [[Hitler]] and [[Nazi]] themed add-ons from the Market for being [[Offended|obscene]] in the eyes of Jews. No word yet on when the Star of David is going to be taken down for being offensive. But you can still have all the [[weev]] dick pics you want.

==Community==
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;"
|<center><big>'''Bitch I Got An Android, fuck you iPhone fanboys [Music Video]'''</big></center> 
<center><youtube>DV9tUW1uMtQ</youtube></center>
 
{{quote|Android been doing that shit, plus they got [[Flash]], and if you talk shit about Android I'll slap you on your ass. Stick my finger [[In the ass|up it]], and then I'll say fuck it.|'''[http://www.youtube.com/user/TripperOnDaTrack TripperOnDaTrack]''' - ''Not realizing that it is impossible to sound gangsta and gay at the same time unless you are in prison.''}}
|}

===People who use/buy this===
* Poorfags
* [[CSIII|Software developers]]
* [[Schizo]]s
* [[Fap|Megan Fox]][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9D2VLmCPTbQ]
* [[Oprah]][http://hawtwired.com/blogs/dailynews/archive/2010/05/03/273.aspx] and [[7 Proxies|by proxy]], [[you|everyone who worships Oprah]].
* People who can't live with out [[Flash]]/[[Porn]] (everyone)
* [[Crapple]] fans who can’t take any more of their shit

===How to Troll Androids users===
[[buttsex|Android]], more so than any other [[windows|OS]], attracts unrivaled numbers of [[fanboys]]. Android users are very defensive about their phones, and tend to tell users of other phones [[shit no one cares about|how great Android is]] even when nobody gives two shits. They also believe that rooting makes them [[CSIII|computer gods]]. Because [[homosexuals|Android users]] are so pointlessly in love with their phones, they make for easy trollng. Any of the following are effective both online and [[irl]].
* Complain about the "platform being too fragmented". Like a pussyass.
* Say Apple's app store is better than Android Market/Google Play/whatever and be sure not to give any supporting evidence.
* Say iOS has better multitasking.
* Say they're too poor to afford an [[dildo|iPhone]].
* Tell them Google is tracking everything they do with it and everywhere they go. (Apple does the same with iOS devices so LOLOL.)
* Point out that root apps are taking advantage of serious security flaws, and that any other app could as well.
* Say that more apps are free on android because they suck [[dick]].
* Tell them that the Motorola-Google merger will MAKE GOOGLE ONLY PRODUCE MOTOROLA PHONES AND WILL SCARE AWAY ALL OTHER MANUFACTURERS-hence destroying Android. As if Motorola phones were not shit anyway.
* Android users really hate Apple, so just say anything good about Apple. Mega-lols.

==Under The Surface==

===Android Kill Switch ===
On June 25, 2010, Google added a new remote feature to the Android Operating system: [http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/google_activates_android_kill_switch_zaps_useless_apps.php?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+readwriteweb+(ReadWriteWeb) The Android Kill Switch].
While Google defends this new backdoor program [[lie|will be used for good]] to allow Google to delete [[shit]] apps off your Android phone, it is essentially Google's version of the [[Internet Kill Switch]].

'''UPDATE:''' As [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R706isyDrqI a wise sage once predicted], Google has in fact [https://www.computerworld.com/article/2506557/security0/google-throws--kill-switch--on-android-phones.html used] the kill switch. Google is an enemy of your freedom. And don't bother Googling a way to disable the kill switch. It's possible but Google is forcing people who post it online to take it down. '''You do not own your phone, Google and their marketing partners do.''' SUCKER.

===Oracle Gets Butthurt===
In a move that seems like one part dickery and twenty parts [[retard|stupid]], [[Oracle]], not mere months after acquiring Sun, have decided to sue Google over their use of Java as the primary development language for Android. If Oracle somehow wins this suit, it could mean the end of Java on Android. All things considered, this would not be the worst thing to happen considering Java is pure and utter shit. Besides, didn't Google make some other compiled language? Why the fuck don't they just use that? Anything is better than fucking Java.

The case is still being fought as of 2018. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oracle_America,_Inc._v._Google,_Inc. It will NEVAR END] because [[Larry Ellison]] is a fuckhead. He laughs at you.

==Gallery==

{{cg|Android|AndroidGallery|center|
<gallery widths="110px" heights="150" perrow="5">
Image:typicalAndroiduser.jpg|[[fanboy|typical android user]]
Image:android_fan_youtube.png|Average argument from an [[Faggot|Android fanboy]]. Note the bad spelling.
Image:Andnothsacred.jpg| [[rule 34|and nothings sacred]]
Image:trollingIRLbb.jpg|Trolls on my Best Buy?
Image:Got-android.jpg
Image:Anonandroidii.jpg|thumb|AnonAndroid
Image:trolldroid.png|no..
Image:D2r2.jpg
Image:Smilydroid.jpg|almost [[creepypasta]]
Image:Android_spambot.png‎| Qualified SMS bomber
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:memehome.jpg|
Image:ForeverAloneliverpaper.jpg
Image:stole-my-bike-live-wallpaper.jpg|stole my bike on my phone
Image:Trollivewallpaper.jpg
Image:ForeverAloneonmydroid.jpg|On my droid?
Image:ChandroidBrowser.png
Image:Apple vs Android.jpg|Epic pic is [[Epic]]
Image:roidrage.jpg
Image:awesomeicon.jpg
Image:troldroid.png
Image:trollingGooglebtards.jpg|very easy trolling to[[pic]]
Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg| This is what most [[fantard|android fans]] fap to
Image:Androidcomock.gif
Image:AndZoidberg.jpg|???
Image:androidbtard.png|[[Advertising|MAKE THIS YOUR PROFILE PICTURE]]
Image:androidFanfic.jpg|google fantards fap to this
</gallery>}}

== See Also ==
* [[iPhone]]
* [[Internet Kill Switch]]
* [[IPhone killer]]
* [[iPad]]
* [[Google]]
* [[Samsung Sam]]
* [[T-Mobile]]
* [[Verizon]]
* [[AT&T]]
* [[Randroid]]
* [[Fairphone]]

{{softwarez}}
{{digital media}}

==External Links==
*[http://www.intomobile.com/2010/12/31/android-tablet-porn/ Android tablet came preloaded with porn, ruins Christmas, LULZ ensued.]

[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]

2014

2026-01-19T10:34:41Z

Yooco: downfall of TrueCrypt

{{time}}
[[Image:Ed {{PAGENAME}} year collage.png|thumb|All about {{PAGENAME}}.]]

'''{{PAGENAME}}''', another year in drama. Sony gets hacked, ED goes down for over a month, ISIS happens, [[Gamergate]] and [[The Fappening]] occurred almost at the same time, [[Malaysia|Malaysian planes fell out of the sky]], [[Elliot Rodger]] became [[an hero]], [[TrueCrypt]] committed [[Archive.org#The_Sorry_List|infocide]], and the lulz almost dies with the near deaths of DOXBIN and TPB, plus the SJW infiltration of 4chan. What more could you ask for? Here's a look at its lulziest events through the cunning eyes of the [[dramacrat]].

Need a recap of what happened [[2013|last year]]? We've got you covered.

==Dramatica Events from {{PAGENAME}}==

[[image:Sue Basko Ad.jpg|135px|thumb|Attorney at lol.]]

===January===

*[[Sue Basko|Sue Basko's]] twitter campaign against ED and [[Doxbin]] goes into full force, after beginning in the last week of [[2013|December]].
*[[Schnookums|Belly rubs]] are in.

===February===

*[[Ragnarok]] happened, apparently.

[[File:Monica Punk All Sad.jpg|115px|thumb|left|Stop bullying me, BAWW.]]

===March===

*Welfare whale [[Monica Punk]] posts a video of herself calling the cops on people that are "bullying" her on the internet. She later finds herself the victim of prank calls and deceitful friendships reminiscent of the good ol' days of [[Chris-chan]].
[[image:Weev 2013.jpg|125px|thumb|right|FREEEEE.]]

===April===

[[Image:Elliot Mlady.jpg|130px|thumb|M'lady.]]

*[[Kimmy]], ("Aunt /b/") '''Queen of''' [[s4s/|'''<nowiki>[s4s]</nowiki>''']] visits the board on its birthday!!
*A kid tries [[Pennsylvania School Stabbing|shooting up his school with a knife]], failing to kill anyone (including himself).
*[[weev]] becomes a free man after his prison conviction gets vacated. He served 13 months of the 41 month sentence (he wasn't set to be released until [[Holy shit|January 2016]]).
*Aspiring attorney at lol, acquaintance of Sue Basko, and enemy of the lulz [[Joseph Camp]] gets sent back to jail after allegedly violating his post-supervised release.
*[[Windows|Windows XP]] joins the deathbed, ending its 12 years of life.

===May===

*ED and its forums go down for over a month. An alarming rate of lulz withdrawals occur worldwide.
*Virgin rage turns deadly when "Supreme Gentleman" [[Elliot Rodger]] goes on a killing spree, kills himself, and leaves behind a trail of desperate forum posts and manifestos. {{hashtag|YesAllWomen}} ([https://web.archive.org/web/20140525153812/https://twitter.com/search?q=%23YesAllWomen&src=hash Archive]) begins trending as a result.

===June===

[[image:Jason van dyke lulyer.jpeg|125px|thumb|Boy, ah tell you h'wut.]]
[[image:Kys a thug.png|135px|thumb|left|#OpShadowrapz.]]

*EDiots band together and donate all their lunch money, trust funds, welfare income, and stolen credit cards in order to bring ED back online. Now with less ads and lulzier than ever!
*After getting [[v&]] in April, Deric Lostutter proceeds to fame-fag his way into the media spotlight by confirming his identity as [[KYAnonymous]], the leader of the [[OpRollRedRoll]] Anonymous hive.
*Japan finally bans [[CP]].
*[[File:YouTube Favicon.png|link=http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4qyBZch9f8juGiVW-E6abQ]] [http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4qyBZch9f8juGiVW-E6abQ '''LulzTalkRadio'''] airs its final episode.

===July===

[[image:Michael Brown of Ferguson, Missouri.jpg|thumb|125px|Trayvon Martin reincarnated and killed all over again.]]
[[file:Zoe_Quinn_Five.png|thumb|left|125px|Would you like fries with that?]]
[[image:Isis_beheading_james_foley_3.png|125px|thumb|Not the way to get ahead in life.]]
[[image:Vivian-james-dance.gif|thumb|left|125px|Vivian James is born.]]

*Some guy starts a [http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/324283889/potato-salad Kickstarter fund] to raise $10 to buy potato salad and ends up getting thousands of dollars in donations. It's currently reached $70,000, but then it [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/{{PAGENAME}}/07/10/potato-salad-kickstarter_n_5573913.html dropped to $44,000] the very next night. It closed with just under $55,500 pledged.
*Incompetent lawyer [https://web.archive.org/web/20140714173813/http://r000t.com/texas-attorney-threatens-opponents-with-death/ Jason Lee Van Dyke] (no, not [[Sue Basko]] this time) sues [[Pink Meth]] for being a "revenge porn" site, and ignorantly includes [[ED:TOR|Tor]] in the lulsuit for hosting it. Hilarious exchanges are had with the gun-totin', truck-drivin' [[redneck|Texan]] on Facebook and Twitter, which he ended up deleting in a failed attempt to erase his actions. He later realizes half of his stupidity and drops the suit against Tor.
*The [[Jada|#Jadapose]] craze sweeps the nation after photos of a black girl's allegedly raped body are posted and subsequently mocked on the internet, sparking hashtags, trendy photos and dances, and butthurt feminism.
*[[Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17]] gets shot down out of the sky in Ukrainian airspace, raining corpses of AIDS researchers and [[dead babies]]. Pilot Parker is identified as the culprit by conspiracy theorists.

===August===

*18-year-old [[Nigger|Michael Brown]] is gunned down by white officer [[Hero|Darren Wilson]] after being caught on surveillance camera robbing a convenience store. The resulting chimpout declares it to be "[[Trayvon]] part 2," Anonymous fails with [[OpFerguson]] by incorrectly doxing the responsible cop before his name was outed, and a fundraiser which had been set up to help the brave officer relocate raises almost $200,000 in a mere 23 days.
*In an ironic twist of fate, the [[Ice Bucket Challenge]] manages to kill more people than the disease it's meant to save people from.
*US journalist [[James Foley]] becomes an international star after [[Anonymous]] supporting rapper L. Jinny beheads him live on video. A sequel starring Steven Sotloff followed shortly after.
*[[Robin Williams]] makes a bid for the [[Golden iPod]] by [[an hero|hanging himself]] at his home. His daughter quits the internet for good after trolls bombard her with [[shooped|fake]] pictures of her dead dad.
*[[Zoe Quinn]] fucks at least 5 different video game designers and journalists (some like Nathan Grayson from pro-feminist website [[Kotaku]]) in exchange for positive reviews on [[Depression Quest]], the shitty text-based game she created. [[Feminazi|Feminazis]] and [[Nods Respectfully Toward You|SJWs]] immediately [[cuck|rush]] to her aid, including [[Phil Fish]], who suffered such an intense online raping that he closed both his Twitter and gaming company down out of butthurt.
*[[4chan]] donates a buttload of cash to a women's charity for video games, earning them a character in one of the games. The ending result is [[Vivian James]]. Meanwhile, butthurt feminazi Patricia Hernandez uses a Twitter sock account to declare 4chan to be the "[[Cathedral of Misogyny]]" for supporting women's charities and donating to colon cancer to chemo butthurt. Reddit winds up earning a character down the road as well and churns out [[:file:Gilda Mars.png|Gilda Mars]], a [[original character|female version]] of the Reddit alien. Vivian-Gilda [[rule 34]] expected to follow.
*[[The Fappening]] is happening! Aka Celebgate {{PAGENAME}}, aka hundreds of nude and scantily-clad female celebrities steadily being leaked on [[AnonIB]] and [[4chan]]. Stand by for damage control.
*[[GamerGate]] blows up as a result of the [[Zoe Quinn]] controversy. In a pathetic attempt at damage control and derailment, the gaming media refuses to lend credence to the actual truth or accept responsibility for the exposed collusion and instead blames everything on [[gamers]]. [[Fact|No, srsly]].

[[file:goodluckebolachan.jpg|left|thumb|125px|Good luck!]]

===September===
[[File:Traf4.jpg|thumb|right|100px]]
*[[TJ Lane]] escapes from prison on [[9/11]], only to be caught 6 hours later in front of a farmhouse in the woods, armed with a fucking [[:file:tj lane pitchfork.jpg|pitchfork]]. He fails to add to his previous [[high score]] and peacefully returns to his life of anal penetration in the slammer.
*[[Leigh Alexander]] becomes e-famous as being the worst [[GamerGate]] critic ever. Fat, racist, alcoholic, *and* a man-hater? No, that's the [[lulz|best]]!
*[[4chan]] dies as a result of [[SJW]] takeover and [[moot]] [[M00t's GamerGate Sellout|caving in]] to their scary threats. [[8chan]] rises from its ashes.
*27 September: A sad day when Former Ohio Rep [[Jim Traficant]] dies when his tractor flips over on him. Was known for speaking the unpopular [[Truth]] such as [[JEWS DID WTC]]. 2 years later, 2016, Donald [[Trump]] would adopt his take no prisoners, politically incorrect style of politics and win the presidency.

[[image:lieghalexander.png|thumb|125px|Silly gamer boys ^_^]]

===October===

*ED loses its [[Daniel Brandt|'''.es''' domain]] and returns to '''.se''' within 5 days, quickly regaining all its lost traffic shortly after.
*[[Shahn Christian Andersen]] files [https://ia801402.us.archive.org/9/items/gov.uscourts.nyed.360902/gov.uscourts.nyed.360902.1.0.pdf a lolsuit] against several EDiots over a satirical article detailing his history of being a scummy criminal scammer.
*A massive [[DDOS]] attack strikes the world of [[furry art]], taking [[FurAffinity]] and SoFurry [[:file:Massive_furry_ddos_dragoneer_tweet.jpg|completely off the internet]], and temporarily knocking other anthro porn sites such as [[Inkbunny]] offline. [[Dragoneer]], the faggot responsible for FurAffinity, is named prime suspect after it was revealed that a fundraiser which had been set up after the attack to protect against future attacks [https://archive.ph/VLPur had in fact been created hours *before*] the actual attack. [http://www.reddit.com/r/furry/comments/2jk5mv/breaking_furaffinity_fundraiser_page_created/clcj66p He responds] by claiming it was coincidental [[Bullshit|shitty timing.]] This happening 2 months after he set up another [https://web.archive.org/web/20140831203406/https://www.gofundme.com/7paw6o GoFundMe drive] just so [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6048518/ he could buy himself] a new Cintiq tablet.
*[[Ebola-chan]] is summoned to take care of the overpopulation and world hunger problems in [[Africa]], and successfully begins thinning out their numbers at an alarming rate. In a dramatic twist, one [[nigger|man]] infected with the [[Ebola virus]] travels to the US, bringing the deadly disease with him as a final act of revenge against whitey before it claims his life.

===November===

*Some guy strangles his girlfriend to death and uploads [http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?40,file=162948,filename=1415164121753.jpg photos of her dead body] to [[4chan]].
*[[Doxbin]] joins [[Silk Road]] and other hidden [[Tor]] sites in being seized by the [[feds]].
*Darren Wilson, the officer who shot 18-year-old [[Michael Brown]] in Ferguson, MO, is found not guilty. A mass [[chimp out]] occurs nationwide, leaving rioting and looting to become the main topic of conversation during everyone's [[Thanksgiving]] dinner.
*Sony hacked AGAIN. Ruinage of Sony Pictures ensues, with leaks including employee SSNs, movies that weren't even released yet, and leaked racist emails between Sony employees. "[[North Korea|Guardians of Peace]]" takes responsibility.

===December===

*[[encyclopedia dramatica|ED]] turns [[ED10|10]]!
*[[TPB]] is [[The Great Torrent Raid|raided]] and temporarily taken offline, before returning as a countdown page, and a <s>AES</s> Bittorrent Sync key on the .se domain. Copycat sites like Isohunt's OldPirateBay, ThePairatebay.link, and thepiratebay.com.ua attempt to take its place.
*[[Sony]] Pictures freaks out after getting <nowiki>#</nowiki>REKT by North Korean super l33t hackers and cancels their film "The Interview." After being called out by everyone, their dog and even the President on their faggotry of caving to terrorists, Sony pulls a 180 and releases it online and in indie theaters on the same day as planned for release.
*[[Lizard Squad]] claims responsibility for trolling gamers by taking the PlayStation Network and XBOX Live offline for Christmas. Just in time for game console presents!
*[[Chris-Chan]] is sent back to jail for macing a [[GameStop]] employee over [[Sonic]]'s arms being colored blue in the new Sonic Blast game.

{{history}}
{{Timeline|Dramatic Years|[[2013]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[2015]]}}

[[Category:2014]]

File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

2026-01-19T10:20:09Z

Yooco: Yooco uploaded a new version of File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

== Summary ==
Sources:
* https://web.archive.org/web/20220611011743/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info
* https://web.archive.org/web/20240324134715/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info

Virus

2026-01-19T10:03:22Z

Yooco: /* Second definition */ CPUdeath.vir from hackx.www.undrwrld.com

[[File:Bacteriophage.jpg|thumb|[[Shit_nobody_cares_about|See those legs? NOT EVEN REAL LEGS! Just proteins that happen to behave like legs when a current is passed through them.]]]]

Either referring to an infectious micro-organism or [[Back Orifice|a computer program designed to fuck with other computers]].

== First Definition ==
A microscopic entity that infects other organisms and reproduces through the host's cells, often causing negative health effects like an insatiable desire for yiffing. Most virii are able to eventually [[pwn]] their host if left untreated. It is debated by scientists as to whether virii can be classified as living organisms (which is awesome), as it cannot [[Masturbation|reproduce by itself]], a requirement for the biological definition of the word 'organism.' Virii are also immune to [[Drugs|antibiotics]] (also awesome), further supporting the thought that they are not alive. After a human immune system [[pwns]] an infecting virus, it 'knows' how to dispose of it if it were to ever try to fuck with you again. Some virii, however, constantly mutate, causing the immune system to have to figure out how to [[pwn]] it again. The result of this is that [[you]] constantly get [[virus | the common cold]].

== How does this kind of shit even comes about to exist? ==

1. Retarded cell shits out its DNA. 
2. DNA floats along. 
3. Dumbfuck bacteria's friend dares to eat that shit. 
4. Nothing happens. 
5. Repeat steps 1-3. 
6. Assbrained bacteria starts crapping more ... 
7. ... viral DNA out instead of making its food. 
8. New DNA is a little different. 
9. Repeat steps 7-8. 

Eventually through sheer dumb luck you get this faggot, the mother fucking T-4 bacteriophage.
This nigger doesn't give a shit about you, its about as alive as that funny looking .exe in that hentai manga you downloaded, its just the hellspawned offspring of a machine and some primordial organism.

That stone cold killa doesn't even care about reproducing, all it wants to do is fuck your shit up and just ruin your day.

Nigga is probably just a biological weapon come to wreck your shit.

DISCLAIMER: The T-4 bacteriophage, like all varieties of viruses can only infect one particular organism so you are safe... for now.
Also remember that for every organism that has been investigated, not a single one has been found to be free from viruses that target them.

There are also [[retards | people who argue]] that the virii were just developed by [[alien]] [[jew | jews]] that lived on the [[earth]] before humans and attempted to make nanites [[for teh lulz]], but eventually ended up wiping themselves out of existence.

== Commonly Known Virii ==
[[Image:Locust_canary2.jpg|thumb|These locusts are dancing to celebrate the evolution of a new strain of the ebola virus.]]
Cold: Extremely contagious, colds are spread through any conceivable contact with an infected person. Usually causes minor flu symptoms. There are so many strains of the cold virus that it is impossible to be vaccinated for them. So deal with it, pussy, and show up for work.

Influenza (The Flu): Commonly spread by [[Lol_Wut|airborne saliva]]. Can cause varying degrees of fever, headache, runny nose, nausea, and fatigue. This virus is smart enough to tell time, as it mutates annually, and many, mostly [[old people]], are encouraged to get the vaccine for the flu that particular year since they [[suck]] too much to deal with it themselves. The flu was originally developed by the [[jews]] as a precursor to AIDs.

Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV): Spread through the sharing of most bodily fluids, excluding saliva. Statistics say that it is [[Lie|most commonly spread through the sharing of needles]], but we all know it's [[You|gay]] [[buttsex]] that causes [[AIDS]]. This virus is strange, in that it doesn't [[pwn]] you itself, but rather destroys the immune system of its host, which lets other [[Fellatio|sucky]] virii, like colds, [[pwn]] you instead. But don't be fooled by its passive behavior; if you get HIV, you will be [[pwned]]. Period. So would you rather be pwned by a lame virus, or would you rather [[An_Hero|go out with a bang]], shot down by S.W.A.T. teams as you shoot every person not as lame or gay or [[buttsex]]ed as you?

See also: Carlow Crab

== Second definition ==
[[Image:Bewaremalesta.JPG|thumb|right|case of extreme intelligence on ED]]
[[Image:Virus_lies.jpg|thumb|right|[[PROTIP]]: Unsolicited pop-ups are always friendly and helpful]]
A virus can also mean a malicious computer program designed to [[Rape|fuck]] with your settings, programs, e-mail, or entire computer altogether. Usually made by [[Basement_Dweller|lonely]] [[hacker]]s who like to make computers do what they want cause they can't get anything else to, including [[16 year old girls]] and their [[penis]]es. In addition to that, most of caught virus creators said that they [[did it for the lulz]].
[[File:Virus download.gif|thumb|CPUdeath.vir from hackx.www.undrwrld.com]]

== How Does I Shot Virus? ==
CRACK WGA!
http://rapidshare.com/files/40300603/Windows.Genuine.Advantage.Validation.v1.7.36.0.rar

ULTIMATE FTP LIST!
http://rapidshare.com/files/39546182/Ultimate_FTP_List_Over_10000_Servers_Listed.rar

Lie|RAPIDSHIT PREMIUM ACCOUNTS! ALL TESTED AND WORKING!
http://rapidshare.com/files/39348619/Over_250_Pages_RS_Premium_Accounts.rar

OVER 10,000 SERIALS, SIMPLY THE BEST!
http://rapidshare.com/files/39309505/Serials_Simply_the_best_2007.xls

THE BEST LESBIAN PORN AVAILABLE!
http://rapidshare.com/files/40594073/the_best_lesbian_porn_available.rar

DOWNLOAD THIS ISSUE OF EGM FROM AUGUST 2007!
http://rapidshare.com/files/41595621/EGMMagAugust07PDF.zip

DOWNLOAD THIS COLLECTION OF EBOOKS AND LEARN HOW TO HACK!
http://rapidshare.com/files/41222803/Hacking.rar</pre>

GO TO THIS WEBSITE AND DO WHATEVER THEY TELL YOU!
http://boards.4chan.org/b

OR JUST GO TO:
{{SERVER}}
(proven to work)

AND IF NONE OF THAT WORKS, GO DOWNLOAD THIS SHIT! https://thezoo.morirt.com

== See also ==

*[[Computer Gremlins]]
*[[Fdisk]]
*[[Last Measure]]
*[[Avast]]
*[[Microsoft]]
*[[Bacteria]]
*[[PIFTS.exe]]
*[[StarForce]]
*[[System32]]
*[[Virus-20]]
*[[Stuxnet]]
*[[Swayzak]]

{{softwarez}}

[[Category:Abnormal Psych]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]

File:Virus download.gif

2026-01-19T10:00:00Z

Yooco: CPUdeath.vir from hackx.www.undrwrld.com. Source: https://roland.pri.ee/roland/HTML/funstuff/viirus.html

== Summary ==
CPUdeath.vir from hackx.www.undrwrld.com.
Source: https://roland.pri.ee/roland/HTML/funstuff/viirus.html

Android

2026-01-19T08:05:47Z

Yooco: Flappy Bird

[[File:Android pissing on Apple.png|right]]
[[File:If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.png|thumb|right|If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.]]

'''Android''' ('''[[Apple]]''' + '''[[Steroid]]''') is [[Java]] bloatware built into a disabled [[Linux]] distribution, made for [[mobile phone]] faggots too afraid to sell their kidney for an [[iPhone]]. Starting out in [[2003]] as a dickless Frankenstein, it was made popular after [[Google]] bought the [[copyright|rights]] in [[2005]] and made the [[when you see it|shitbrick]] G1. Android runs on various devices because of their [[open source]] nature (AOSP), with just about any phone by HTC, Samsung, Asus, OnePlus, Motorola and any other non-iPhone mobile devices. It's the 21st century's [[Windows|one-for-all OS]], and the glue holding many markets in a harmonious [[lemonparty|circlejerk]]. It is currently the most popular mobile platform in the world with over 1 billion [[big brother|recorded]] users.

One of the main selling points of Android smartphones used to be the freedom to install applications through APK files ("[[sideloading]]"), which allowed running apps removed from the Play Store like [[Flappy Bird]]. Starting with Android 17 in 2026, all APK files require Google's approval in order to be able to run on your smartphone that you parid for.

==WHO MADE THIS CRAP==
[[Image:DataTNG.jpg|thumb|right| Not to be confused with this android.]]
[[Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg|thumb|250 px|right|Or this one]]

That's easy -- it was a giant hack-job thanks to Andy [[Jew]] Rubin, who started Android Inc. as a separate company and sold it off to [[Google]] in 2005 for a shit-river of cash. Or rather; he hired a few dozen nameless coders who assembled the main codebase, so Andy could claim HE invented it all. After Android created the most popular smartphone OS in history, Larry'n'Sergey gave Andy $90 mil to go away in 2014. Because Andy was fond of [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/technology/google-sexual-harassment-andy-rubin.html shtupping female employees]. He promptly started several other tech firms, [http://playground.global/ one of which] is an "incubator" for new ideas. And that is how to disappear an excess $90 million.
{{squote|What Google did not make public was that an employee had accused Mr. Rubin of sexual misconduct. The woman, with whom Mr. Rubin had been having an extramarital relationship, said he coerced her into performing oral sex in a hotel room in 2013, according to two company executives with knowledge of the episode. Google investigated and concluded her claim was credible, said the people, who spoke on the condition that they not be named, citing confidentiality agreements. Mr. Rubin was notified, they said, and Mr. Page asked for his resignation.

Google could have fired Mr. Rubin and paid him little to nothing on the way out. Instead, the company handed him a $90 million exit package, paid in installments of about $2 million a month for four years, said two people with knowledge of the terms. The last payment is scheduled for next month.}}

==The System==
===Pros===

[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|Google Chrome thinks that the Android Market is a cover for attackers to install [[malware]] on your computer, and they are correct!]]
* Make phone calls. (Unless you have [[AT&T]], then fuck you.)
* Exploit critical/unpatched security holes and act like its a feature. (also known as "[[shit no one cares about|root]]")
* [[Flash|Download additional battery raping security holes.]]
* [http://www.imoseyon.com/ Rape battery raping security holes.]
* Overclock and melt processor.
* <strike>[[Tethering|Tether]] your phone to your laptop to share your phone's [[Internets]] illegally because you're too fucking poor to pay for it. This can be done via USB or WiFi.</strike> <strike>Verizon and AT&T may banz free [[illegal]] [[Tethering|tethering]] [http://bit.ly/r2ZNUy here]</strike> Just root it and you can download an app that still does it for free.
* [[Flash|Play Farmville.]]
* Download shit-grade free apps.
* Download [[TPB|pirated]] apps that MAY CONTAIN <strike>AIDS</strike> [[AIDS|MALWARE]]!
* Customizing your fucking homescreens with widgets
[[Image:ForeverAloneWidget.gif|right|frame|Yes you can download it. [[DO IT]] Faggot!]]
* Download porn apps. (As long as the Parents Television Council keeps their hands off the Android Marketplace!)
* Download Sound /b/oard.
* Install apps remotely with [http://appbrain.com/ Appbrain] so you can fuck things up good.
* Use your bluetooth headphones/Bluesniping
* WiFi / Wardriving like a script kiddie.
* Take photos in the dark. (some android phones have double flash all the way)
* Scan barcodes.
* Live Wallpapers to make your clit hard.
* Use as a big screen TV. (see: Droid X, lol DISCONTINUED)
* Tell Google everything that you are doing. (This can be minimized by turning off "Submit usage to Google" and by not using Google Buzz. Unless you're a FUCKING MORON like 99% of Android users.)
* Buy a fucking piece of plastic to protect the screen from your dirty fingers from Verizon for $15. (WTF?!)
* Flood the Android Market with [[over 9000]] bogus apps that do nothing but show you a couple of images of [[Justin Bieber]] with huge tits, ripped from Google Images; and sell them for 99 cents.
* [http://news.techworld.com/mobile-wireless/3234932/google-android-smartphones-hit-by-trojan/ Download viruses] and make yourself miserable, sucker.
* Pinch to zoom. Like an iPhone diddling pussy.
* Use Google Goggles to solve Sudoku.
* Use Google Goggles to identify fucking everything.
* Play retro video games with [[NES]], [[SNES]], [[SEGA|Genesis]], [[PlayStation|PS1]] emulators and more.
* Use a physical keyboard (on many Motorola and HTC phones). Beware that if you are a [[fatty]] with fat fingers [[nobody cares]] about you or your ability to use a hardware keyboard. (lol DISCONTINUED, all Android phones are fucky iPhone clones now)
* Watch apps crash from [[over 9000]] memory leaks.
* Buy yourself some [[Hookers and blow|hookers and blow]] with the extra money you won't be shelling out to buy an iPhone.
* Laugh at people walking out of an AT&T or Mac Store who will be sleeping in a cardboard box with their Apple Debt.
* Take photos of said [[basement dweller|cardboard dwellers]] as they cry their salty tears into the gutter because they have no home to go to anymore.
* [[CSIII|Make your own apps]]...[http://appinventor.googlelabs.com/about/ CSIII style!].
* Troll Steve Jobs or Tim Cook (if they aren't dead yet).
* Troll [[apple|iPhags]], especially if they paid $1200 for an iPhone Xs.
* Automatic application updates.
* REAL MULTITASKING. Whatever that means.
* Voice Actions using Voice Search. Not only will your phone display all the disgusting [[furry]] porn you talk about all day, it will also report everything back to [[Larry Page]].
* Be forced into using [[Bing]] (root will let you uninstall)
* Sync with Google [[Chrome]]. You have no choice, the phone AND the PC will harass you until you do it.
* [http://www.mobidroid.com/products/dildroid Fuck it.] (lol BANKRUPT)
* [[Freedom]] lolol
* [http://www.zdnet.com/blog/hardware/android-sms-bug-sends-your-messages-to-random-contacts/10796 Send an SMS intended for a chick you're fucking to your girlfriend, your boss, and your grandma without you knowing.]
* Randomly delete all of your messages.
* Reboot for no apparent reason.
* Reboot for no apparent reason during an important phone call.
* Share your authTokens with everyone.
* Destroy brain tissue with the [[Facebook]] app. A billion flies can't be wrong, eat shit!

===Cons===
[[File:G1time2.jpg|thumb|Main promotional photo for the G1, where the clock is set to 2 different times 2:47 and [[9/11|9:11]]. This is thought to be a message from an [[1337|elite]] group of Google engineers tho are desperately trying to get out [[JEWS DID WTC|the truth]].]]
* You can't use it with any [[iPod]] enabled device. Like you would want to anyways, not a big loss there. You can, however, plug it into any standard audio jack or USB port. Something the iPhuck can't do anymore lol.
* Some devices can't be used with a [[Mac]] because it hasn't been approved by your [[Macfag|Apple Genius]], and nothing of value was lost.
* You can't use [[IRC]] on some [[shit|3G]] [[Snugglenets|networks]] that only allow for secure connection. You can however IRC using WiFi or through 3G on browser based clients like Mibbit. You could also be 1337 and [[SSH]] in through a [[UNIX]] server and screen irssi you [[faggot|Mary]]. Nothing is more fulfilling than unleashing the power of [[gay.pl]] while you are driving.
* <s>Install it on an iPhone.</s> <s>[http://www.idroidproject.org/wiki/Status Now you can.]</s> (oopsiedaisy nevermind DEAD PROJECT as of 2015)
* Have an acceptable battery life. (GIANT EXTERNAL brick battery will fix this, and make you look like a cuntboy)
* Have a mediocre battery life. <strike>(Root+CPU manager fixes this)</strike> (lol NOTHING FIXES IT ANYMORE)
* Back up your phone log or text messages. (3rd Party has this covered nao)
* Back up your browser bookmarks (Again, 3rd party has it covered)
* Back up any of the apps you downloaded for free. (Most of the apps that you paid for are remembered. PDANet won't appear in that list because you paid the folks at PDANet not Google.)
* Back up any other data stored on internal memory. (See root)
* Get the guy at the [[Verizon|phone store]] to [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING]] off your old Android phone.

===What you will be able to do with it in the future===

[[File:Gingerbread-zombie-painting.jpg|thumb|[[I, for one, welcome our new X overlords|I, for one, welcome our new Android overlords.]]]]
* Play WebM/HTML5/VP8 games just barely....
* Play music over the cloud without buffering or hiccups (Google is making music to stream over your network instead of using space).
* Use it with Google TV to run your porn apps.
* [[Divide by Zero]] (According to Gizmodo).

==Apps==
{{tinyquote|Give it up, you turd. It's a [[java]] sandbox wrapped in another sandbox.|[[User:h64]]}}

If for some in-fucking-credibly misguided reason you do decide to make an app, heed this warning; you will want to fucking [[an hero|shoot yourself]] half way through.

===Banned Apps===
[[File:Androlf Hitler.jpg|thumb|240px|SIEG HEIL!!!]]

Just like Apple, Google also has a blacklist of apps, although they have yet to blacklist most of the [[shit]] apps that flood the Android Market everyday. Verizon, in particular, doesn't like any app that allows users to [http://www.cnet.com/8301-19736_1-20013244-251.html avoid paying their $20 add on fee for Wifi tethering]. The average Android user is paying about $107 per month for service through Verizon Wireless, so fuck them AND YOU.
* [http://www.unstableapps.com/?p=44 Easy Root] was removed from thew market for stealing the source for the app from DMUpdate, a FREE rooting process.
* Android [[Last Thursday|recently]] decided to [http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/08/13/google-quashes-pro-hitler-android-apps/ remove a slew] of [[Hitler]] and [[Nazi]] themed add-ons from the Market for being [[Offended|obscene]] in the eyes of Jews. No word yet on when the Star of David is going to be taken down for being offensive. But you can still have all the [[weev]] dick pics you want.

==Community==
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;"
|<center><big>'''Bitch I Got An Android, fuck you iPhone fanboys [Music Video]'''</big></center> 
<center><youtube>DV9tUW1uMtQ</youtube></center>
 
{{quote|Android been doing that shit, plus they got [[Flash]], and if you talk shit about Android I'll slap you on your ass. Stick my finger [[In the ass|up it]], and then I'll say fuck it.|'''[http://www.youtube.com/user/TripperOnDaTrack TripperOnDaTrack]''' - ''Not realizing that it is impossible to sound gangsta and gay at the same time unless you are in prison.''}}
|}

===People who use/buy this===
* Poorfags
* [[CSIII|Software developers]]
* [[Schizo]]s
* [[Fap|Megan Fox]][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9D2VLmCPTbQ]
* [[Oprah]][http://hawtwired.com/blogs/dailynews/archive/2010/05/03/273.aspx] and [[7 Proxies|by proxy]], [[you|everyone who worships Oprah]].
* People who can't live with out [[Flash]]/[[Porn]] (everyone)
* [[Crapple]] fans who can’t take any more of their shit

===How to Troll Androids users===
[[buttsex|Android]], more so than any other [[windows|OS]], attracts unrivaled numbers of [[fanboys]]. Android users are very defensive about their phones, and tend to tell users of other phones [[shit no one cares about|how great Android is]] even when nobody gives two shits. They also believe that rooting makes them [[CSIII|computer gods]]. Because [[homosexuals|Android users]] are so pointlessly in love with their phones, they make for easy trollng. Any of the following are effective both online and [[irl]].
* Complain about the "platform being too fragmented". Like a pussyass.
* Say Apple's app store is better than Android Market/Google Play/whatever and be sure not to give any supporting evidence.
* Say iOS has better multitasking.
* Say they're too poor to afford an [[dildo|iPhone]].
* Tell them Google is tracking everything they do with it and everywhere they go. (Apple does the same with iOS devices so LOLOL.)
* Point out that root apps are taking advantage of serious security flaws, and that any other app could as well.
* Say that more apps are free on android because they suck [[dick]].
* Tell them that the Motorola-Google merger will MAKE GOOGLE ONLY PRODUCE MOTOROLA PHONES AND WILL SCARE AWAY ALL OTHER MANUFACTURERS-hence destroying Android. As if Motorola phones were not shit anyway.
* Android users really hate Apple, so just say anything good about Apple. Mega-lols.

==Under The Surface==

===Android Kill Switch ===
On June 25, 2010, Google added a new remote feature to the Android Operating system: [http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/google_activates_android_kill_switch_zaps_useless_apps.php?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+readwriteweb+(ReadWriteWeb) The Android Kill Switch].
While Google defends this new backdoor program [[lie|will be used for good]] to allow Google to delete [[shit]] apps off your Android phone, it is essentially Google's version of the [[Internet Kill Switch]].

'''UPDATE:''' As [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R706isyDrqI a wise sage once predicted], Google has in fact [https://www.computerworld.com/article/2506557/security0/google-throws--kill-switch--on-android-phones.html used] the kill switch. Google is an enemy of your freedom. And don't bother Googling a way to disable the kill switch. It's possible but Google is forcing people who post it online to take it down. '''You do not own your phone, Google and their marketing partners do.''' SUCKER.

===Oracle Gets Butthurt===
In a move that seems like one part dickery and twenty parts [[retard|stupid]], [[Oracle]], not mere months after acquiring Sun, have decided to sue Google over their use of Java as the primary development language for Android. If Oracle somehow wins this suit, it could mean the end of Java on Android. All things considered, this would not be the worst thing to happen considering Java is pure and utter shit. Besides, didn't Google make some other compiled language? Why the fuck don't they just use that? Anything is better than fucking Java.

The case is still being fought as of 2018. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oracle_America,_Inc._v._Google,_Inc. It will NEVAR END] because [[Larry Ellison]] is a fuckhead. He laughs at you.

==Gallery==

{{cg|Android|AndroidGallery|center|
<gallery widths="110px" heights="150" perrow="5">
Image:typicalAndroiduser.jpg|[[fanboy|typical android user]]
Image:android_fan_youtube.png|Average argument from an [[Faggot|Android fanboy]]. Note the bad spelling.
Image:Andnothsacred.jpg| [[rule 34|and nothings sacred]]
Image:trollingIRLbb.jpg|Trolls on my Best Buy?
Image:Got-android.jpg
Image:Anonandroidii.jpg|thumb|AnonAndroid
Image:trolldroid.png|no..
Image:D2r2.jpg
Image:Smilydroid.jpg|almost [[creepypasta]]
Image:Android_spambot.png‎| Qualified SMS bomber
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:memehome.jpg|
Image:ForeverAloneliverpaper.jpg
Image:stole-my-bike-live-wallpaper.jpg|stole my bike on my phone
Image:Trollivewallpaper.jpg
Image:ForeverAloneonmydroid.jpg|On my droid?
Image:ChandroidBrowser.png
Image:Apple vs Android.jpg|Epic pic is [[Epic]]
Image:roidrage.jpg
Image:awesomeicon.jpg
Image:troldroid.png
Image:trollingGooglebtards.jpg|very easy trolling to[[pic]]
Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg| This is what most [[fantard|android fans]] fap to
Image:Androidcomock.gif
Image:AndZoidberg.jpg|???
Image:androidbtard.png|[[Advertising|MAKE THIS YOUR PROFILE PICTURE]]
Image:androidFanfic.jpg|google fantards fap to this
</gallery>}}

== See Also ==
* [[iPhone]]
* [[Internet Kill Switch]]
* [[IPhone killer]]
* [[iPad]]
* [[Google]]
* [[Samsung Sam]]
* [[T-Mobile]]
* [[Verizon]]
* [[AT&T]]
* [[Randroid]]
* [[Fairphone]]

{{softwarez}}
{{digital media}}

==External Links==
*[http://www.intomobile.com/2010/12/31/android-tablet-porn/ Android tablet came preloaded with porn, ruins Christmas, LULZ ensued.]

[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]

Android

2026-01-19T08:04:53Z

Yooco: forgot thumb

[[File:Android pissing on Apple.png|right]]
[[File:If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.png|thumb|right|If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.]]

'''Android''' ('''[[Apple]]''' + '''[[Steroid]]''') is [[Java]] bloatware built into a disabled [[Linux]] distribution, made for [[mobile phone]] faggots too afraid to sell their kidney for an [[iPhone]]. Starting out in [[2003]] as a dickless Frankenstein, it was made popular after [[Google]] bought the [[copyright|rights]] in [[2005]] and made the [[when you see it|shitbrick]] G1. Android runs on various devices because of their [[open source]] nature (AOSP), with just about any phone by HTC, Samsung, Asus, OnePlus, Motorola and any other non-iPhone mobile devices. It's the 21st century's [[Windows|one-for-all OS]], and the glue holding many markets in a harmonious [[lemonparty|circlejerk]]. It is currently the most popular mobile platform in the world with over 1 billion [[big brother|recorded]] users.

One of the main selling points of Android smartphones used to be the freedom to install applications through APK files ("[[sideloading]]"). Starting with Android 17 in 2026, all APK files require Google's approval in order to be able to run on your smartphone that you parid for.

==WHO MADE THIS CRAP==
[[Image:DataTNG.jpg|thumb|right| Not to be confused with this android.]]
[[Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg|thumb|250 px|right|Or this one]]

That's easy -- it was a giant hack-job thanks to Andy [[Jew]] Rubin, who started Android Inc. as a separate company and sold it off to [[Google]] in 2005 for a shit-river of cash. Or rather; he hired a few dozen nameless coders who assembled the main codebase, so Andy could claim HE invented it all. After Android created the most popular smartphone OS in history, Larry'n'Sergey gave Andy $90 mil to go away in 2014. Because Andy was fond of [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/technology/google-sexual-harassment-andy-rubin.html shtupping female employees]. He promptly started several other tech firms, [http://playground.global/ one of which] is an "incubator" for new ideas. And that is how to disappear an excess $90 million.
{{squote|What Google did not make public was that an employee had accused Mr. Rubin of sexual misconduct. The woman, with whom Mr. Rubin had been having an extramarital relationship, said he coerced her into performing oral sex in a hotel room in 2013, according to two company executives with knowledge of the episode. Google investigated and concluded her claim was credible, said the people, who spoke on the condition that they not be named, citing confidentiality agreements. Mr. Rubin was notified, they said, and Mr. Page asked for his resignation.

Google could have fired Mr. Rubin and paid him little to nothing on the way out. Instead, the company handed him a $90 million exit package, paid in installments of about $2 million a month for four years, said two people with knowledge of the terms. The last payment is scheduled for next month.}}

==The System==
===Pros===

[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|Google Chrome thinks that the Android Market is a cover for attackers to install [[malware]] on your computer, and they are correct!]]
* Make phone calls. (Unless you have [[AT&T]], then fuck you.)
* Exploit critical/unpatched security holes and act like its a feature. (also known as "[[shit no one cares about|root]]")
* [[Flash|Download additional battery raping security holes.]]
* [http://www.imoseyon.com/ Rape battery raping security holes.]
* Overclock and melt processor.
* <strike>[[Tethering|Tether]] your phone to your laptop to share your phone's [[Internets]] illegally because you're too fucking poor to pay for it. This can be done via USB or WiFi.</strike> <strike>Verizon and AT&T may banz free [[illegal]] [[Tethering|tethering]] [http://bit.ly/r2ZNUy here]</strike> Just root it and you can download an app that still does it for free.
* [[Flash|Play Farmville.]]
* Download shit-grade free apps.
* Download [[TPB|pirated]] apps that MAY CONTAIN <strike>AIDS</strike> [[AIDS|MALWARE]]!
* Customizing your fucking homescreens with widgets
[[Image:ForeverAloneWidget.gif|right|frame|Yes you can download it. [[DO IT]] Faggot!]]
* Download porn apps. (As long as the Parents Television Council keeps their hands off the Android Marketplace!)
* Download Sound /b/oard.
* Install apps remotely with [http://appbrain.com/ Appbrain] so you can fuck things up good.
* Use your bluetooth headphones/Bluesniping
* WiFi / Wardriving like a script kiddie.
* Take photos in the dark. (some android phones have double flash all the way)
* Scan barcodes.
* Live Wallpapers to make your clit hard.
* Use as a big screen TV. (see: Droid X, lol DISCONTINUED)
* Tell Google everything that you are doing. (This can be minimized by turning off "Submit usage to Google" and by not using Google Buzz. Unless you're a FUCKING MORON like 99% of Android users.)
* Buy a fucking piece of plastic to protect the screen from your dirty fingers from Verizon for $15. (WTF?!)
* Flood the Android Market with [[over 9000]] bogus apps that do nothing but show you a couple of images of [[Justin Bieber]] with huge tits, ripped from Google Images; and sell them for 99 cents.
* [http://news.techworld.com/mobile-wireless/3234932/google-android-smartphones-hit-by-trojan/ Download viruses] and make yourself miserable, sucker.
* Pinch to zoom. Like an iPhone diddling pussy.
* Use Google Goggles to solve Sudoku.
* Use Google Goggles to identify fucking everything.
* Play retro video games with [[NES]], [[SNES]], [[SEGA|Genesis]], [[PlayStation|PS1]] emulators and more.
* Use a physical keyboard (on many Motorola and HTC phones). Beware that if you are a [[fatty]] with fat fingers [[nobody cares]] about you or your ability to use a hardware keyboard. (lol DISCONTINUED, all Android phones are fucky iPhone clones now)
* Watch apps crash from [[over 9000]] memory leaks.
* Buy yourself some [[Hookers and blow|hookers and blow]] with the extra money you won't be shelling out to buy an iPhone.
* Laugh at people walking out of an AT&T or Mac Store who will be sleeping in a cardboard box with their Apple Debt.
* Take photos of said [[basement dweller|cardboard dwellers]] as they cry their salty tears into the gutter because they have no home to go to anymore.
* [[CSIII|Make your own apps]]...[http://appinventor.googlelabs.com/about/ CSIII style!].
* Troll Steve Jobs or Tim Cook (if they aren't dead yet).
* Troll [[apple|iPhags]], especially if they paid $1200 for an iPhone Xs.
* Automatic application updates.
* REAL MULTITASKING. Whatever that means.
* Voice Actions using Voice Search. Not only will your phone display all the disgusting [[furry]] porn you talk about all day, it will also report everything back to [[Larry Page]].
* Be forced into using [[Bing]] (root will let you uninstall)
* Sync with Google [[Chrome]]. You have no choice, the phone AND the PC will harass you until you do it.
* [http://www.mobidroid.com/products/dildroid Fuck it.] (lol BANKRUPT)
* [[Freedom]] lolol
* [http://www.zdnet.com/blog/hardware/android-sms-bug-sends-your-messages-to-random-contacts/10796 Send an SMS intended for a chick you're fucking to your girlfriend, your boss, and your grandma without you knowing.]
* Randomly delete all of your messages.
* Reboot for no apparent reason.
* Reboot for no apparent reason during an important phone call.
* Share your authTokens with everyone.
* Destroy brain tissue with the [[Facebook]] app. A billion flies can't be wrong, eat shit!

===Cons===
[[File:G1time2.jpg|thumb|Main promotional photo for the G1, where the clock is set to 2 different times 2:47 and [[9/11|9:11]]. This is thought to be a message from an [[1337|elite]] group of Google engineers tho are desperately trying to get out [[JEWS DID WTC|the truth]].]]
* You can't use it with any [[iPod]] enabled device. Like you would want to anyways, not a big loss there. You can, however, plug it into any standard audio jack or USB port. Something the iPhuck can't do anymore lol.
* Some devices can't be used with a [[Mac]] because it hasn't been approved by your [[Macfag|Apple Genius]], and nothing of value was lost.
* You can't use [[IRC]] on some [[shit|3G]] [[Snugglenets|networks]] that only allow for secure connection. You can however IRC using WiFi or through 3G on browser based clients like Mibbit. You could also be 1337 and [[SSH]] in through a [[UNIX]] server and screen irssi you [[faggot|Mary]]. Nothing is more fulfilling than unleashing the power of [[gay.pl]] while you are driving.
* <s>Install it on an iPhone.</s> <s>[http://www.idroidproject.org/wiki/Status Now you can.]</s> (oopsiedaisy nevermind DEAD PROJECT as of 2015)
* Have an acceptable battery life. (GIANT EXTERNAL brick battery will fix this, and make you look like a cuntboy)
* Have a mediocre battery life. <strike>(Root+CPU manager fixes this)</strike> (lol NOTHING FIXES IT ANYMORE)
* Back up your phone log or text messages. (3rd Party has this covered nao)
* Back up your browser bookmarks (Again, 3rd party has it covered)
* Back up any of the apps you downloaded for free. (Most of the apps that you paid for are remembered. PDANet won't appear in that list because you paid the folks at PDANet not Google.)
* Back up any other data stored on internal memory. (See root)
* Get the guy at the [[Verizon|phone store]] to [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING]] off your old Android phone.

===What you will be able to do with it in the future===

[[File:Gingerbread-zombie-painting.jpg|thumb|[[I, for one, welcome our new X overlords|I, for one, welcome our new Android overlords.]]]]
* Play WebM/HTML5/VP8 games just barely....
* Play music over the cloud without buffering or hiccups (Google is making music to stream over your network instead of using space).
* Use it with Google TV to run your porn apps.
* [[Divide by Zero]] (According to Gizmodo).

==Apps==
{{tinyquote|Give it up, you turd. It's a [[java]] sandbox wrapped in another sandbox.|[[User:h64]]}}

If for some in-fucking-credibly misguided reason you do decide to make an app, heed this warning; you will want to fucking [[an hero|shoot yourself]] half way through.

===Banned Apps===
[[File:Androlf Hitler.jpg|thumb|240px|SIEG HEIL!!!]]

Just like Apple, Google also has a blacklist of apps, although they have yet to blacklist most of the [[shit]] apps that flood the Android Market everyday. Verizon, in particular, doesn't like any app that allows users to [http://www.cnet.com/8301-19736_1-20013244-251.html avoid paying their $20 add on fee for Wifi tethering]. The average Android user is paying about $107 per month for service through Verizon Wireless, so fuck them AND YOU.
* [http://www.unstableapps.com/?p=44 Easy Root] was removed from thew market for stealing the source for the app from DMUpdate, a FREE rooting process.
* Android [[Last Thursday|recently]] decided to [http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/08/13/google-quashes-pro-hitler-android-apps/ remove a slew] of [[Hitler]] and [[Nazi]] themed add-ons from the Market for being [[Offended|obscene]] in the eyes of Jews. No word yet on when the Star of David is going to be taken down for being offensive. But you can still have all the [[weev]] dick pics you want.

==Community==
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;"
|<center><big>'''Bitch I Got An Android, fuck you iPhone fanboys [Music Video]'''</big></center> 
<center><youtube>DV9tUW1uMtQ</youtube></center>
 
{{quote|Android been doing that shit, plus they got [[Flash]], and if you talk shit about Android I'll slap you on your ass. Stick my finger [[In the ass|up it]], and then I'll say fuck it.|'''[http://www.youtube.com/user/TripperOnDaTrack TripperOnDaTrack]''' - ''Not realizing that it is impossible to sound gangsta and gay at the same time unless you are in prison.''}}
|}

===People who use/buy this===
* Poorfags
* [[CSIII|Software developers]]
* [[Schizo]]s
* [[Fap|Megan Fox]][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9D2VLmCPTbQ]
* [[Oprah]][http://hawtwired.com/blogs/dailynews/archive/2010/05/03/273.aspx] and [[7 Proxies|by proxy]], [[you|everyone who worships Oprah]].
* People who can't live with out [[Flash]]/[[Porn]] (everyone)
* [[Crapple]] fans who can’t take any more of their shit

===How to Troll Androids users===
[[buttsex|Android]], more so than any other [[windows|OS]], attracts unrivaled numbers of [[fanboys]]. Android users are very defensive about their phones, and tend to tell users of other phones [[shit no one cares about|how great Android is]] even when nobody gives two shits. They also believe that rooting makes them [[CSIII|computer gods]]. Because [[homosexuals|Android users]] are so pointlessly in love with their phones, they make for easy trollng. Any of the following are effective both online and [[irl]].
* Complain about the "platform being too fragmented". Like a pussyass.
* Say Apple's app store is better than Android Market/Google Play/whatever and be sure not to give any supporting evidence.
* Say iOS has better multitasking.
* Say they're too poor to afford an [[dildo|iPhone]].
* Tell them Google is tracking everything they do with it and everywhere they go. (Apple does the same with iOS devices so LOLOL.)
* Point out that root apps are taking advantage of serious security flaws, and that any other app could as well.
* Say that more apps are free on android because they suck [[dick]].
* Tell them that the Motorola-Google merger will MAKE GOOGLE ONLY PRODUCE MOTOROLA PHONES AND WILL SCARE AWAY ALL OTHER MANUFACTURERS-hence destroying Android. As if Motorola phones were not shit anyway.
* Android users really hate Apple, so just say anything good about Apple. Mega-lols.

==Under The Surface==

===Android Kill Switch ===
On June 25, 2010, Google added a new remote feature to the Android Operating system: [http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/google_activates_android_kill_switch_zaps_useless_apps.php?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+readwriteweb+(ReadWriteWeb) The Android Kill Switch].
While Google defends this new backdoor program [[lie|will be used for good]] to allow Google to delete [[shit]] apps off your Android phone, it is essentially Google's version of the [[Internet Kill Switch]].

'''UPDATE:''' As [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R706isyDrqI a wise sage once predicted], Google has in fact [https://www.computerworld.com/article/2506557/security0/google-throws--kill-switch--on-android-phones.html used] the kill switch. Google is an enemy of your freedom. And don't bother Googling a way to disable the kill switch. It's possible but Google is forcing people who post it online to take it down. '''You do not own your phone, Google and their marketing partners do.''' SUCKER.

===Oracle Gets Butthurt===
In a move that seems like one part dickery and twenty parts [[retard|stupid]], [[Oracle]], not mere months after acquiring Sun, have decided to sue Google over their use of Java as the primary development language for Android. If Oracle somehow wins this suit, it could mean the end of Java on Android. All things considered, this would not be the worst thing to happen considering Java is pure and utter shit. Besides, didn't Google make some other compiled language? Why the fuck don't they just use that? Anything is better than fucking Java.

The case is still being fought as of 2018. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oracle_America,_Inc._v._Google,_Inc. It will NEVAR END] because [[Larry Ellison]] is a fuckhead. He laughs at you.

==Gallery==

{{cg|Android|AndroidGallery|center|
<gallery widths="110px" heights="150" perrow="5">
Image:typicalAndroiduser.jpg|[[fanboy|typical android user]]
Image:android_fan_youtube.png|Average argument from an [[Faggot|Android fanboy]]. Note the bad spelling.
Image:Andnothsacred.jpg| [[rule 34|and nothings sacred]]
Image:trollingIRLbb.jpg|Trolls on my Best Buy?
Image:Got-android.jpg
Image:Anonandroidii.jpg|thumb|AnonAndroid
Image:trolldroid.png|no..
Image:D2r2.jpg
Image:Smilydroid.jpg|almost [[creepypasta]]
Image:Android_spambot.png‎| Qualified SMS bomber
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:memehome.jpg|
Image:ForeverAloneliverpaper.jpg
Image:stole-my-bike-live-wallpaper.jpg|stole my bike on my phone
Image:Trollivewallpaper.jpg
Image:ForeverAloneonmydroid.jpg|On my droid?
Image:ChandroidBrowser.png
Image:Apple vs Android.jpg|Epic pic is [[Epic]]
Image:roidrage.jpg
Image:awesomeicon.jpg
Image:troldroid.png
Image:trollingGooglebtards.jpg|very easy trolling to[[pic]]
Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg| This is what most [[fantard|android fans]] fap to
Image:Androidcomock.gif
Image:AndZoidberg.jpg|???
Image:androidbtard.png|[[Advertising|MAKE THIS YOUR PROFILE PICTURE]]
Image:androidFanfic.jpg|google fantards fap to this
</gallery>}}

== See Also ==
* [[iPhone]]
* [[Internet Kill Switch]]
* [[IPhone killer]]
* [[iPad]]
* [[Google]]
* [[Samsung Sam]]
* [[T-Mobile]]
* [[Verizon]]
* [[AT&T]]
* [[Randroid]]
* [[Fairphone]]

{{softwarez}}
{{digital media}}

==External Links==
*[http://www.intomobile.com/2010/12/31/android-tablet-porn/ Android tablet came preloaded with porn, ruins Christmas, LULZ ensued.]

[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]

Android

2026-01-19T08:04:36Z

Yooco: Android "freedom" is over.

[[File:Android pissing on Apple.png|right]]
[[File:If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.png|right|If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.]]

'''Android''' ('''[[Apple]]''' + '''[[Steroid]]''') is [[Java]] bloatware built into a disabled [[Linux]] distribution, made for [[mobile phone]] faggots too afraid to sell their kidney for an [[iPhone]]. Starting out in [[2003]] as a dickless Frankenstein, it was made popular after [[Google]] bought the [[copyright|rights]] in [[2005]] and made the [[when you see it|shitbrick]] G1. Android runs on various devices because of their [[open source]] nature (AOSP), with just about any phone by HTC, Samsung, Asus, OnePlus, Motorola and any other non-iPhone mobile devices. It's the 21st century's [[Windows|one-for-all OS]], and the glue holding many markets in a harmonious [[lemonparty|circlejerk]]. It is currently the most popular mobile platform in the world with over 1 billion [[big brother|recorded]] users.

One of the main selling points of Android smartphones used to be the freedom to install applications through APK files ("[[sideloading]]"). Starting with Android 17 in 2026, all APK files require Google's approval in order to be able to run on your smartphone that you parid for.

==WHO MADE THIS CRAP==
[[Image:DataTNG.jpg|thumb|right| Not to be confused with this android.]]
[[Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg|thumb|250 px|right|Or this one]]

That's easy -- it was a giant hack-job thanks to Andy [[Jew]] Rubin, who started Android Inc. as a separate company and sold it off to [[Google]] in 2005 for a shit-river of cash. Or rather; he hired a few dozen nameless coders who assembled the main codebase, so Andy could claim HE invented it all. After Android created the most popular smartphone OS in history, Larry'n'Sergey gave Andy $90 mil to go away in 2014. Because Andy was fond of [https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/25/technology/google-sexual-harassment-andy-rubin.html shtupping female employees]. He promptly started several other tech firms, [http://playground.global/ one of which] is an "incubator" for new ideas. And that is how to disappear an excess $90 million.
{{squote|What Google did not make public was that an employee had accused Mr. Rubin of sexual misconduct. The woman, with whom Mr. Rubin had been having an extramarital relationship, said he coerced her into performing oral sex in a hotel room in 2013, according to two company executives with knowledge of the episode. Google investigated and concluded her claim was credible, said the people, who spoke on the condition that they not be named, citing confidentiality agreements. Mr. Rubin was notified, they said, and Mr. Page asked for his resignation.

Google could have fired Mr. Rubin and paid him little to nothing on the way out. Instead, the company handed him a $90 million exit package, paid in installments of about $2 million a month for four years, said two people with knowledge of the terms. The last payment is scheduled for next month.}}

==The System==
===Pros===

[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|Google Chrome thinks that the Android Market is a cover for attackers to install [[malware]] on your computer, and they are correct!]]
* Make phone calls. (Unless you have [[AT&T]], then fuck you.)
* Exploit critical/unpatched security holes and act like its a feature. (also known as "[[shit no one cares about|root]]")
* [[Flash|Download additional battery raping security holes.]]
* [http://www.imoseyon.com/ Rape battery raping security holes.]
* Overclock and melt processor.
* <strike>[[Tethering|Tether]] your phone to your laptop to share your phone's [[Internets]] illegally because you're too fucking poor to pay for it. This can be done via USB or WiFi.</strike> <strike>Verizon and AT&T may banz free [[illegal]] [[Tethering|tethering]] [http://bit.ly/r2ZNUy here]</strike> Just root it and you can download an app that still does it for free.
* [[Flash|Play Farmville.]]
* Download shit-grade free apps.
* Download [[TPB|pirated]] apps that MAY CONTAIN <strike>AIDS</strike> [[AIDS|MALWARE]]!
* Customizing your fucking homescreens with widgets
[[Image:ForeverAloneWidget.gif|right|frame|Yes you can download it. [[DO IT]] Faggot!]]
* Download porn apps. (As long as the Parents Television Council keeps their hands off the Android Marketplace!)
* Download Sound /b/oard.
* Install apps remotely with [http://appbrain.com/ Appbrain] so you can fuck things up good.
* Use your bluetooth headphones/Bluesniping
* WiFi / Wardriving like a script kiddie.
* Take photos in the dark. (some android phones have double flash all the way)
* Scan barcodes.
* Live Wallpapers to make your clit hard.
* Use as a big screen TV. (see: Droid X, lol DISCONTINUED)
* Tell Google everything that you are doing. (This can be minimized by turning off "Submit usage to Google" and by not using Google Buzz. Unless you're a FUCKING MORON like 99% of Android users.)
* Buy a fucking piece of plastic to protect the screen from your dirty fingers from Verizon for $15. (WTF?!)
* Flood the Android Market with [[over 9000]] bogus apps that do nothing but show you a couple of images of [[Justin Bieber]] with huge tits, ripped from Google Images; and sell them for 99 cents.
* [http://news.techworld.com/mobile-wireless/3234932/google-android-smartphones-hit-by-trojan/ Download viruses] and make yourself miserable, sucker.
* Pinch to zoom. Like an iPhone diddling pussy.
* Use Google Goggles to solve Sudoku.
* Use Google Goggles to identify fucking everything.
* Play retro video games with [[NES]], [[SNES]], [[SEGA|Genesis]], [[PlayStation|PS1]] emulators and more.
* Use a physical keyboard (on many Motorola and HTC phones). Beware that if you are a [[fatty]] with fat fingers [[nobody cares]] about you or your ability to use a hardware keyboard. (lol DISCONTINUED, all Android phones are fucky iPhone clones now)
* Watch apps crash from [[over 9000]] memory leaks.
* Buy yourself some [[Hookers and blow|hookers and blow]] with the extra money you won't be shelling out to buy an iPhone.
* Laugh at people walking out of an AT&T or Mac Store who will be sleeping in a cardboard box with their Apple Debt.
* Take photos of said [[basement dweller|cardboard dwellers]] as they cry their salty tears into the gutter because they have no home to go to anymore.
* [[CSIII|Make your own apps]]...[http://appinventor.googlelabs.com/about/ CSIII style!].
* Troll Steve Jobs or Tim Cook (if they aren't dead yet).
* Troll [[apple|iPhags]], especially if they paid $1200 for an iPhone Xs.
* Automatic application updates.
* REAL MULTITASKING. Whatever that means.
* Voice Actions using Voice Search. Not only will your phone display all the disgusting [[furry]] porn you talk about all day, it will also report everything back to [[Larry Page]].
* Be forced into using [[Bing]] (root will let you uninstall)
* Sync with Google [[Chrome]]. You have no choice, the phone AND the PC will harass you until you do it.
* [http://www.mobidroid.com/products/dildroid Fuck it.] (lol BANKRUPT)
* [[Freedom]] lolol
* [http://www.zdnet.com/blog/hardware/android-sms-bug-sends-your-messages-to-random-contacts/10796 Send an SMS intended for a chick you're fucking to your girlfriend, your boss, and your grandma without you knowing.]
* Randomly delete all of your messages.
* Reboot for no apparent reason.
* Reboot for no apparent reason during an important phone call.
* Share your authTokens with everyone.
* Destroy brain tissue with the [[Facebook]] app. A billion flies can't be wrong, eat shit!

===Cons===
[[File:G1time2.jpg|thumb|Main promotional photo for the G1, where the clock is set to 2 different times 2:47 and [[9/11|9:11]]. This is thought to be a message from an [[1337|elite]] group of Google engineers tho are desperately trying to get out [[JEWS DID WTC|the truth]].]]
* You can't use it with any [[iPod]] enabled device. Like you would want to anyways, not a big loss there. You can, however, plug it into any standard audio jack or USB port. Something the iPhuck can't do anymore lol.
* Some devices can't be used with a [[Mac]] because it hasn't been approved by your [[Macfag|Apple Genius]], and nothing of value was lost.
* You can't use [[IRC]] on some [[shit|3G]] [[Snugglenets|networks]] that only allow for secure connection. You can however IRC using WiFi or through 3G on browser based clients like Mibbit. You could also be 1337 and [[SSH]] in through a [[UNIX]] server and screen irssi you [[faggot|Mary]]. Nothing is more fulfilling than unleashing the power of [[gay.pl]] while you are driving.
* <s>Install it on an iPhone.</s> <s>[http://www.idroidproject.org/wiki/Status Now you can.]</s> (oopsiedaisy nevermind DEAD PROJECT as of 2015)
* Have an acceptable battery life. (GIANT EXTERNAL brick battery will fix this, and make you look like a cuntboy)
* Have a mediocre battery life. <strike>(Root+CPU manager fixes this)</strike> (lol NOTHING FIXES IT ANYMORE)
* Back up your phone log or text messages. (3rd Party has this covered nao)
* Back up your browser bookmarks (Again, 3rd party has it covered)
* Back up any of the apps you downloaded for free. (Most of the apps that you paid for are remembered. PDANet won't appear in that list because you paid the folks at PDANet not Google.)
* Back up any other data stored on internal memory. (See root)
* Get the guy at the [[Verizon|phone store]] to [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING]] off your old Android phone.

===What you will be able to do with it in the future===

[[File:Gingerbread-zombie-painting.jpg|thumb|[[I, for one, welcome our new X overlords|I, for one, welcome our new Android overlords.]]]]
* Play WebM/HTML5/VP8 games just barely....
* Play music over the cloud without buffering or hiccups (Google is making music to stream over your network instead of using space).
* Use it with Google TV to run your porn apps.
* [[Divide by Zero]] (According to Gizmodo).

==Apps==
{{tinyquote|Give it up, you turd. It's a [[java]] sandbox wrapped in another sandbox.|[[User:h64]]}}

If for some in-fucking-credibly misguided reason you do decide to make an app, heed this warning; you will want to fucking [[an hero|shoot yourself]] half way through.

===Banned Apps===
[[File:Androlf Hitler.jpg|thumb|240px|SIEG HEIL!!!]]

Just like Apple, Google also has a blacklist of apps, although they have yet to blacklist most of the [[shit]] apps that flood the Android Market everyday. Verizon, in particular, doesn't like any app that allows users to [http://www.cnet.com/8301-19736_1-20013244-251.html avoid paying their $20 add on fee for Wifi tethering]. The average Android user is paying about $107 per month for service through Verizon Wireless, so fuck them AND YOU.
* [http://www.unstableapps.com/?p=44 Easy Root] was removed from thew market for stealing the source for the app from DMUpdate, a FREE rooting process.
* Android [[Last Thursday|recently]] decided to [http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/08/13/google-quashes-pro-hitler-android-apps/ remove a slew] of [[Hitler]] and [[Nazi]] themed add-ons from the Market for being [[Offended|obscene]] in the eyes of Jews. No word yet on when the Star of David is going to be taken down for being offensive. But you can still have all the [[weev]] dick pics you want.

==Community==
{| align="center" style="padding:0px;"
|<center><big>'''Bitch I Got An Android, fuck you iPhone fanboys [Music Video]'''</big></center> 
<center><youtube>DV9tUW1uMtQ</youtube></center>
 
{{quote|Android been doing that shit, plus they got [[Flash]], and if you talk shit about Android I'll slap you on your ass. Stick my finger [[In the ass|up it]], and then I'll say fuck it.|'''[http://www.youtube.com/user/TripperOnDaTrack TripperOnDaTrack]''' - ''Not realizing that it is impossible to sound gangsta and gay at the same time unless you are in prison.''}}
|}

===People who use/buy this===
* Poorfags
* [[CSIII|Software developers]]
* [[Schizo]]s
* [[Fap|Megan Fox]][http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9D2VLmCPTbQ]
* [[Oprah]][http://hawtwired.com/blogs/dailynews/archive/2010/05/03/273.aspx] and [[7 Proxies|by proxy]], [[you|everyone who worships Oprah]].
* People who can't live with out [[Flash]]/[[Porn]] (everyone)
* [[Crapple]] fans who can’t take any more of their shit

===How to Troll Androids users===
[[buttsex|Android]], more so than any other [[windows|OS]], attracts unrivaled numbers of [[fanboys]]. Android users are very defensive about their phones, and tend to tell users of other phones [[shit no one cares about|how great Android is]] even when nobody gives two shits. They also believe that rooting makes them [[CSIII|computer gods]]. Because [[homosexuals|Android users]] are so pointlessly in love with their phones, they make for easy trollng. Any of the following are effective both online and [[irl]].
* Complain about the "platform being too fragmented". Like a pussyass.
* Say Apple's app store is better than Android Market/Google Play/whatever and be sure not to give any supporting evidence.
* Say iOS has better multitasking.
* Say they're too poor to afford an [[dildo|iPhone]].
* Tell them Google is tracking everything they do with it and everywhere they go. (Apple does the same with iOS devices so LOLOL.)
* Point out that root apps are taking advantage of serious security flaws, and that any other app could as well.
* Say that more apps are free on android because they suck [[dick]].
* Tell them that the Motorola-Google merger will MAKE GOOGLE ONLY PRODUCE MOTOROLA PHONES AND WILL SCARE AWAY ALL OTHER MANUFACTURERS-hence destroying Android. As if Motorola phones were not shit anyway.
* Android users really hate Apple, so just say anything good about Apple. Mega-lols.

==Under The Surface==

===Android Kill Switch ===
On June 25, 2010, Google added a new remote feature to the Android Operating system: [http://www.readwriteweb.com/archives/google_activates_android_kill_switch_zaps_useless_apps.php?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+readwriteweb+(ReadWriteWeb) The Android Kill Switch].
While Google defends this new backdoor program [[lie|will be used for good]] to allow Google to delete [[shit]] apps off your Android phone, it is essentially Google's version of the [[Internet Kill Switch]].

'''UPDATE:''' As [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R706isyDrqI a wise sage once predicted], Google has in fact [https://www.computerworld.com/article/2506557/security0/google-throws--kill-switch--on-android-phones.html used] the kill switch. Google is an enemy of your freedom. And don't bother Googling a way to disable the kill switch. It's possible but Google is forcing people who post it online to take it down. '''You do not own your phone, Google and their marketing partners do.''' SUCKER.

===Oracle Gets Butthurt===
In a move that seems like one part dickery and twenty parts [[retard|stupid]], [[Oracle]], not mere months after acquiring Sun, have decided to sue Google over their use of Java as the primary development language for Android. If Oracle somehow wins this suit, it could mean the end of Java on Android. All things considered, this would not be the worst thing to happen considering Java is pure and utter shit. Besides, didn't Google make some other compiled language? Why the fuck don't they just use that? Anything is better than fucking Java.

The case is still being fought as of 2018. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oracle_America,_Inc._v._Google,_Inc. It will NEVAR END] because [[Larry Ellison]] is a fuckhead. He laughs at you.

==Gallery==

{{cg|Android|AndroidGallery|center|
<gallery widths="110px" heights="150" perrow="5">
Image:typicalAndroiduser.jpg|[[fanboy|typical android user]]
Image:android_fan_youtube.png|Average argument from an [[Faggot|Android fanboy]]. Note the bad spelling.
Image:Andnothsacred.jpg| [[rule 34|and nothings sacred]]
Image:trollingIRLbb.jpg|Trolls on my Best Buy?
Image:Got-android.jpg
Image:Anonandroidii.jpg|thumb|AnonAndroid
Image:trolldroid.png|no..
Image:D2r2.jpg
Image:Smilydroid.jpg|almost [[creepypasta]]
Image:Android_spambot.png‎| Qualified SMS bomber
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:memehome.jpg|
Image:ForeverAloneliverpaper.jpg
Image:stole-my-bike-live-wallpaper.jpg|stole my bike on my phone
Image:Trollivewallpaper.jpg
Image:ForeverAloneonmydroid.jpg|On my droid?
Image:ChandroidBrowser.png
Image:Apple vs Android.jpg|Epic pic is [[Epic]]
Image:roidrage.jpg
Image:awesomeicon.jpg
Image:troldroid.png
Image:trollingGooglebtards.jpg|very easy trolling to[[pic]]
Image:This-is-the-droid-youre-looking-for.jpg| This is what most [[fantard|android fans]] fap to
Image:Androidcomock.gif
Image:AndZoidberg.jpg|???
Image:androidbtard.png|[[Advertising|MAKE THIS YOUR PROFILE PICTURE]]
Image:androidFanfic.jpg|google fantards fap to this
</gallery>}}

== See Also ==
* [[iPhone]]
* [[Internet Kill Switch]]
* [[IPhone killer]]
* [[iPad]]
* [[Google]]
* [[Samsung Sam]]
* [[T-Mobile]]
* [[Verizon]]
* [[AT&T]]
* [[Randroid]]
* [[Fairphone]]

{{softwarez}}
{{digital media}}

==External Links==
*[http://www.intomobile.com/2010/12/31/android-tablet-porn/ Android tablet came preloaded with porn, ruins Christmas, LULZ ensued.]

[[Category:IRL Shit]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]

File:If Google were honest - Android Developer Verification.png

2026-01-19T07:57:17Z

Yooco: Original corporate propaganda page: https://developer.android.com/developer-verification Android's original philosophy and goals: https://archive.ph/2012.12.04-171030/http://source.android.com/about/philosophy.html

== Summary ==
Original corporate propaganda page: https://developer.android.com/developer-verification
Android's original philosophy and goals: https://archive.ph/2012.12.04-171030/http://source.android.com/about/philosophy.html

Bitchute

2026-01-19T07:42:46Z

Yooco: They left the UK in 2025 due to the Online Safety Act.

{{Achtung|(((OY VEY)))}}
{{center|[[File:Star of david 2.gif]][[File:Oy Vey-Bithute.Takedown.bmp]][[File:Star of david 2.gif]]}}
{{Achtung|(((OY VEY)))}}
{{withjews}}
[[File:BitchUte logo.png|thumb|'''[[Bitch]]'''ute logo.]]
'''{{PAGENAME}}''' is a vastly superior alternative to [[JewTube]], with no censorship, copyright system, and no rules on [[CP|what you can upload]] to the site. Most videos uploaded to {{PAGENAME}} are right wing [[Nazi]] videos, conspiracy theories, manosphere content, and the average [[porn|spicy video]]. The purpose of {{PAGENAME}} is to expose the "[[truth]]" that you will not see anywhere else, especially not on JewTube, which is why it's so popular among neo Nazis and KKK members. Given the content, however, <s>it's actually quite ironic given that {{PAGENAME}} is a [[British]] company, and we all know how censorship-happy, [[feminism|feminized]], and just generally cucked the UK is, riiiiight?</s> They left the UK in 2025 due to the Online Safety Act.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/4cNS5c0faChJ/ BitChute has officially left the UK]</ref>

Aside from the above, the site is also a [[circlejerk|popular hotspot]] for [[cuckservatives]] like [[Tucker Carlson]] to post recording of [[Faux News]] broadcasts, and is the favourite online platform of [[bitch]]es.

==Video Quality==
Every fucking video you upload is processed and rerendered into 480p quality, and depending on the original file format, the sound also sound like [[shit]] most of the time as well. Also it's a coin-flip whether or not you'll actually be able to play a video, especially if it's an older one. One day it'll play normally, and the next day you'll be staring at the page for like an hour or more as the video gets stuck buffering it.

When BitChute first started, they had a status of how well they were doing via donations from SubscribeStar (basically another Patreon escept it's crypto friendly). It took them a year and a half to two years to reach one of their top goal of upgraded servers, but as far as anyone can tell, there doesn't seem to be anything different outside of uploads processing quicker.

== Most popular content ==
As one might expect, the most popular videos are coronavirus related videos from 2020, the first spot being taken by Plandemic, with 2.6 Million views as of October 2023.<ref>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/IB3ijQuLkkUr/ Plandemic Documentary: The Hidden Agenda Behind Covid-19]</ref>

The most popular video uploaded before 2020 is the documentary "Europa - The Final Battle", with 1.6 Million views as of October 2023. It takes an entire day to watch. Its title has "HD" in it, which implies it is at least 720p, even though [[#Video_Quality|it isn't]].<ref>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/s1nPYDj7KBEQ/ EUROPA: The Last Battle (2017) - Full Documentary HD]</ref>

==BitChute vs The Banks==
On December 13th 2022, BitChute posted online that they were running into financial troubles; specifically that the banks were fucking with them, and what's worse, it wasn't the first time it happened. They aired their dirty laundry on '''{{archive|mbmnX|GiveSendGo}}''' (yet another support/begging site), but the tl;dr version is that HSBC (and UK's banking system in general) absolutely HATES BitChute and would rather have them dead than to give BitChute back their money. This is, of course, on top of other things such as "activist group attacks" which forced BitChute to relocate and loose their suppliers. It really begs the question why BitChute thought doing ANYTHING business related within the UK was a good idea to begin with.

==Notable {{PAGENAME}} Channels==
*<s>[https://www.bitchute.com/channel/black-crimes-matter/ Black Crimes Matter]</s> ([[Banned|B&]]) - A channel that documents [[nigger]] crimes in the [[Jewnited States of Americunts]]. Despite BS allowing all sorts of other content, BCM is actually ''censored'', because it apparently breaks the [[internet law|local laws]] of the United Cuckdom. This is not a problem, however. Since geoblocks are just as useless as a ''[[cunt]] on a nun'', all you need is [[seven proxies]] to easily bypass it.
*[https://www.bitchute.com/channel/SdA7JwX9dfhl/ Turd Flinging Monkey] - A conspiracy theorist who comes up with all kinds of shit to explain [[12 years old|why society does the things it does]].
*[https://www.bitchute.com/channel/hQl9oMSgUyMX/ You Can't Stop Progress] - A channel dedicated to exposing the evils of a [[liberal]] society. Full of video clips of trannies, trannies defending other trannies, and niggers rioting,
*[https://www.bitchute.com/channel/cTvNGRozmEM0/ MoonSquad] - Mainly reuploads [[moonman]] shit. Stopped posting around march.

==See Also==
*[[Joe Rogan]]
*[[YouTube]]
*[[GoyimTV]]
*[[Dailymotion]]
*[[Tucker Carlson]]

==External Links==
*[https://www.bitchute.com/ Bitchute]
{{sites}}
{{britfags}}
{{jewseries}}

File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

2026-01-19T07:25:48Z

Yooco: Yooco uploaded a new version of File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

2026-01-19T07:20:29Z

Yooco: Yooco uploaded a new version of File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

Wikipedia

2026-01-19T07:18:25Z

Yooco: + screenshot

{{achtung|1=
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{{!}}The view count for Wikipedia's "Nigger" article was disabled! [https://archive.today/2025.09.08-135146/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info See for yourself!]
{{!}}[[File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png{{!}}upright{{!}}x70px]]
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<center><div>[[Image:wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|1100px]]</div>
<div>{{morphquote|ahfuckicantbelieveyouneedauniquecsselement|background-color:#FFF;|font-weight:bold;
|They even have this policy, it's WP colon DICK, it's called '''don't be a dick''' and it's fucking hilarious because '''they're all fucking dicks'''|[[hipcrime]]
|Dear Wikipedia readers: We are the small non-profit that runs the #5 website in the world. We have only 150 staff but serve 500 million users, and have costs like any other top site: servers, power, programs, and staff. Wikipedia is something special. It is like a library or a public park. It is like a temple for the mind, a place we can all go to think and learn. To protect our independence, we'll never run ads. We take no government funds. We survive on donations averaging about $30. Now is the time we ask. If everyone reading this gave $3, our fundraiser would be done within an hour. If Wikipedia is useful to you, take one minute to keep it online and ad-free another year. Please help us forget fundraising and get back to Wikipedia. Thank you.|TOW begging [[Jews]] for their [[Jew golds]].
|And you will never find a more wretched hive of pseudoskeptical, atheistic scum and villainy. We must be cautious.|With apologies to Sir Alec Guinness
|Great idea, wrong species|E.O. Wilson (on communism, but he meant Wikipedia)
|Verifiability, not truth|Wikipedo's content policy. It's okay to cite a supermarket tabloid as proof, provided you do cite it.
| [W]ithout the content[,] Wikipedia is just Facebook for ugly people[.] |Iridescent, Wikipedia administrator, 2015-07-31<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20231216202028/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia_talk:Requests_for_adminship/Liz&diff=next&oldid=673901499 Wikipedia talk:Requests for adminship/Liz: Difference between revisions, 2015-07-31]</ref>
}}</div></center>
[[Image:720px-Illustration of anal bead use svg.png|thumb|right|Vectored TOW porn. That means they spend time tracing over the lines.]]
[[Image:Wiki-fisting.png|thumb|The kind of [[shit]] you find on TOW. {{wikilink|Fisting|Added at Jimbo's /r/}}]]
[[File:Wikipedia wobble.gif|thumb|BULLSHITTING INTENSIFIES]]
[[File:Multiple orgasms using foreskin.mp4|thumb|right|The penises of many Wikipedia administrators are unable to do this, so they [[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|use Wikipedia to promote cutting it off]] so they can feel less inferior. ]]
[[File:Stephen Pruitt - 5 million Wikipedia edits, 0 sex.jpg|thumb|Meet the Wiki-pedo-ian with the most edits. 6 million Wikipedia edits, 0 girlfriends followed by koafv aka JUSTINE ANTHONY KNAPP/KRAPP!!! ]]

'''World of Wikipedoia''', also known as '''''that other wiki''''' (''T.O W.''), '''the Internet's sacred cow of knowledge''', '''holy orb of knowledge''', '''[[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|the circumphiles' paradise]]''', '''Mr. "I am always right"''', '''the Internet's self-appointed gatekeepers of information'''<ref name=wikipee />, '''Wikipee'''<ref name=wikipee>[https://www.michaelzwilliamson.com/cms/index.php/18-general/556-502 The Massive Failure That Is Wikipee - Michael Z. Williamson (21 July 2019)] - </q>The deletion of the page ended my writing career, destroyed my awards, drained my bank account... Oh, wait, no, it did nothing whatsoever. Utterly fucking irrelevant. Which pretty much sums up the failures who've appointed themselves gatekeepers of what is "credible" or "notable." Easy enough: go to google. There are 69,800 google hits for my name. If only it was 70,000, they might care...<q></ref>, '''Ministry of Truth'''<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Dig Deeper]</ref>, or '''Wikipedia''', is a radical left wing propoganda website disguised as a blog and is justified by other radical left news pages from [[mainstream media|corrupt media]], which they refer to as "reliable sources".<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml#sources Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Reliable sources - DigDeeper]</ref> It is considered an "encyclopedia" and the best of [[humanity]], proof for to how the absolute [[mental retardation]] has contaminated the entire [[world]] population. Editiors plagiarize other people's work, they twist the words around and they boast how they are smart with new article creation or article "improvement."
Let it also be known that the first article on Wikipedia was for Afghanistan, reinforcing the idea that Wiki-pedo-ia is popular among the sandnigger pedophile community, another reason why ''not'' to use '''TOW'''.

Wikipedia also is a [[MMORPG|massive multiplayer online role-playing game]] in which some [[geek]] braggarts compete to paraphrase [[TL;DR]] information into a shorter, reader-friendlier format. However, unlike any other MMORPG, the major rewards and upgrades are to players' perceived expertise on their own edits, which players can trade in for sparse IRL recognition or can add to their [[no life|sparse lists of personal accomplishments]].

During gameplay, Wikipedia players can gain more authority as they progress, with "Administrator" and "Double-O Licensed" rankings granting them access to GOD MODE. While the rules for winning the game are a tightly-kept secret, it is believed that the winner is treated to a night of accolades and praise from Wikipedia overlord [[Jimbo Wales]].

Had Wikipedia not been infiltrated by propagandists and circumphiles long ago, it would at least be an attractive target for them.

(There's also pieces of an "encyclopedia" buried in there, among the articles about [[anime]] fanboy crap and [[football]].)
__TOC__
{{clear}}
==What is a Wiki? An Example of Supreme Idiocy==
[[Image:Wiki-dictatorship.png|center|800px]]
 
[[File:USS liberty - the final solution.png|thumb|"Verifiability above truth, and Israeli propaganda before either"]]
[[Image:Semfaceani.gif|thumb|Not-so-subtle [[racism]] on the '''{{wikilink|Facial_(sex_act)|facial page}}'''.]]
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Requests_for_arbitration/Charles_Darwin-Lincoln_dispute|Edit war dispute}}'''. A full out tribunal complete with e-court and e-arbitration and extra special e-punishment. The users are serving their e-sentences with 3-year bans and Wikipedia-style "house arrests" in which they cannot edit certain articles and must behave in a certain way. The entire argument stems from the fact that Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln share a birthday. This resulted in huge [[lulz]] for everyone else but none for them, while Wikipedophiles got all [[emo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident|Talk page about USS Liberty}}''' in which [[Jayjg]] attempts to argue with the vice president of the USS Liberty Veterans Association about the Liberty incident. Yes, '''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident/Archive_2#Hopefully_something_to_be_quickly_resolved_...|an Israeli agent involved in the cover-up}}''' is allowed to always have the last word on the article, not someone who was actually there and involved in the events in question.
*People who think that Wikipedia can love them back are always easy to troll. Case in point: '''{{wptl|Vanboto}}''', who discovered that a few people guarded the article on the song "Rock Lobster" with a passion, reverting all edits which tried to insert the fact that it was once played on ''[[Family Guy]]''. His response: a brave and bold display of insanity, petty reverts, harassment, personal attacks, irrelevant responses, and trolling. In short, clearly admin material if not for the fact that he was obviously there to have fun and not contribute in any meaningful way, as evidenced by his constant references to ''[[Fresh_Prince|The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air]]'', ''[[Dungeons & Dragons]]'', and ''[[Pokemon]]''. End result: a permaban and much drama. That'll do, [[troll]], that'll do... on the other hand, trolling wikipedos who think they're the "keymaster and gatekeeper" of articles is most necessary.
*The courageous protectors of Katie Couric have decided that citing [[South Park]] makes their [[butthurt]] and so it's OK to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/w/index.php?title=User_talk:87.69.176.81&diff=287041938&oldid=287022906 call people useless dicks and tell them to go fuck themselves]. To those who suffer from amnesia, [https://southpark.cc.com/video-clips/1cgdy1/south-park-crap-verification here is the clip] that angered these [[faggot]]s and made them call the [[Waaaambulance]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Hot_dog|The discussion page for the article on Hot dogs}}'''. It's about <s>10</s> '''38''' pages long and filled with drama. About HOT DOGS.
*[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?search=wikipedia+vandalism&title=Special%3ASearch&profile=advanced&fulltext=1&ns0=1 Certain searches] mysteriously "failing"
*'''{{wikilink|William_Shatner's_musical_career|William Shatner's musical career}}'''
*[[John Seigenthaler Sr.]] - Exposing the Kennedy assassin.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Feces/archive1|Their pants-wetting terror of poop}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Semen|A bitchfest about an image of semen}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Child_pornography|Talk page about Child pornography}}''', their favorite subject. [[Wikipedos]] argue that the [[CP]] article needs moar CP plox. For further lulz, check out the archives.
*Wikipedia is somehow controlled by both the far right and the far left wing political parties at the same time, creating a paradox, without any lulz.
*A place to '''{{wikilink|Talk:Mudkip/Archive02#Anti-mudkip_bias|argue about discrimination against Mudkips}}''', while providing images showing how one can keep [[Mudkip]]'s fin erect.
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:LAME|WP:LAME}}''' contains a full list of Wikipedia's dumbest content disputes - including full-out edit wars over everything from the height and weight of [[Street Fighter]] characters, whether the title of [[Avril Lavigne]]'s hit single "I'm with You" should have a capitalized "W", the cup size of a female ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' character, to whether or not Daffy Duck fathered any children, and more - yes these were all real edit wars, [[srsly]].
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Songs_about_Wikipedia|A collection of fan-written songs about Wikipedia}}''', most of which are stolen from well known popular songs (ex. "Doncha' wish your Pedia was Free like Me?" - ripped off from a Pussycat Dolls single).
*What could possibly be more useful than '''{{wikilink|Category:Living_people|a nine-trillion page category comprising an alphabetical list of all Wikipedia biographies with subjects who are currently still alive?}}''' Because obviously you can't trust the individual articles themselves and so this list is bound to be more up-to-date and reliable, not to mention convenient.

==History==
[[Image:No to Wikipedia.png|thumb|right|170px|Say NO to '''Wik ipedia'''. Do not be tempted into the "encyclopedia" for the [[Poverty|poor]].]]The Wikipedia game originally began as a plot to streamline the [[plagiarism]] of college essays.

Said plot was evil, so naturally, a [[Jew]] was involved. Once the Jew realized that tricking narcissists into self-indentured servitude was an easy way to profit, he immediately began a campaign to turn all Google users into "contributors" to the full-blown cut and paste orgy of his design.

The encyclopedic aspect of Wikipedia began as a butthurt reaction to its more popular predecessor, Encyclopedia Dramatica. Over time, Wikipedia began to feature more and more interesting topics like the lives of 17th century rabbis, characteristics of the 57th termite chromosome, and Hollywood films including one or more of the ''Sesame Street'' Muppets - in other words, content with no real relevance to internet culture. It now also functions as a limited medical journal (which is useless to its contributor base) and criminal resource for retards.

TOW players, however, got a bit headstrong about the actual value of their contributions, and even the Jew conjurer himself began to think of it as the 21st Century's Library of Alexandria. Indeed, this sustains the standard ''modus operandi'' of Wikipedoes, Jews, Liberals and all who believe that re-writing pre-written facts garners respect from people who can't tell the difference and don't give a damn.
{{clear}}

==Progression through [[the Game]]==

{{morphquote|morphquote|background-color: white; margin: auto;|font-weight: bold;
|Pseudo-scholarship (from pseudo- + scholarship) is a work (e.g., publication, lecture) or body of work '''that is presented as, but is not, the product of rigorous and objective study or research;''' the act of producing such work; or the pretended learning upon which it is based|'''{{wikilink|Pseudo-scholarship|Do go on...}}'''
|Pseudohistory is akin to pseudoscience in that '''both forms of falsification are achieved using the methodology that purports to, but does not, adhere to the established standards of research for the given field of intellectual enquiry to which the pseudoscience claims to be a part, and which offers little or no supporting evidence for its plausibility.'''|'''{{wikilink|Pseudohistory|Tell me more...}}'''
|'''You do!''' Yes, anyone can be bold and edit an existing article or create a new one, and '''volunteers do not need to have any formal training.'''|'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Who_writes_Wikipedia%3F|"Who writes Wikipedia?"}}'''
|Wikipedia is written largely by amateurs. '''Those with expert credentials are given no additional weight.'''|*cough* [[Essjay]] *cough* '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:About#Strengths.2C_weaknesses.2C_and_article_quality_in_Wikipedia|"Strengths and Weaknesses of Wikipedia"}}''' (it doesn't say whether this is a strength or a weakness)
|In Wikipedia, verifiability means that anyone using the encyclopedia can check that the information comes from a reliable source.|So why do you pretend to be an encyclopedia, when you've admitted that you're just a link-farm?
}}

===How the Game Typically Progresses===
#You make edits to articles
#Your edits get reverted by [[aspie]] [[fucktard]]s
#You revert them back and they in turn revert again
#You bicker on the talk page of the article
#You whine about the aspies on the administrator noticeboards accusing them of being uncivil, they in turn accuse you of assuming bad faith
#You open a Request for Comment on their behavior
#You take them to arbitration
#Someone gets banned forever, normally the most sane person
#[[Jimbo]] profits

===Grinding===
You grind by writing articles in a concise, yet obtuse way. This is achieved by ignoring copyediting rules and flavor your material with unwarranted sesquipedalianism (If you did not have to look up this word [[you]] are probably... See! The insulting remark appeared in your head! No one even had to spell it out for you!) It was rumored that by 2020 Wikipedia:s user base will be replaced with Google Paraphrase, a software in development.

===Leveling up===
Each time someone complains to you on your user page, you have gained a level. This is easily achieved, since everything you do will yield complaint: both constructive work and vandalism.

===Player versus player===
How to go player versus player in Wikipedia.
#Remove a raw addition to an article which you easily could have fixed or replaced yourself, and which really does not do any harm. In the very least, it could be used as a pedagogical example for newcomers how an article ''not'' should be written.
#Write an essay on the talk page explaining why the addition was removed citing a lot of so called policies, guidelines and essays. Ignoring the fact that said rules, guidelines and essays was not created to stop newcomers, but to help them understand how Wikipedia works, and also was created to stop dickheads like yourself.
#Get your reversion contested.
#Initiate a voting game for how the issue should be handed.
#An administrator who is the [[judge]] in the voting games, rules in your favour despite the outcome, because he will never thwart the effort of a fellow avocation aficionado bureaucrat, despite how stupid [[you]] are.
#Run amok removing things over the whole site, citing said voting game as if Wikipedia was a court room.
#PROFIT!

===Gaining Experience Points===
*1 vandal reversion = 1 exp (a ''vandal'' is defined as an editor with a different point of view than yours)
*1 legitimate edit to a page = 2 exp
*1 article created (assuming it stays) = 20 exp
*1 Good Article = 100 exp
*1 Featured Article = 200 exp
*1 report to AIV or UAA = 5 exp
*1 page deleted via AfD = 20 exp
*1 page deleted via PROD or CSD = 10 exp
*1 support for an [[Rfa]] = 20 exp
*1 article with POV or misinformation inserted into = 100 exp
*1 user blocked as a result of drama created = 50 exp
*1 instance of getting a page blocked = Over 9000 exp

===TOW Ranks===
*Rollback > 10,000 exp
*Pending changes reviewer > 15,000 exp
*Template editor > 20,000 exp
*Administrator > 100,000 exp
*Bureaucrat > 500,000 exp
*Checkuser or Oversight > 500,000 exp

==Why it's Generally a Huge Bucket of [[Pelican Shit]]==
[[File:Wiki lolrus.jpg|thumb|Yu hav no buket becos it is not in the nuspapers!]]
[[Image:AEdunk.jpg|thumb|Encyclopædia Dramatica once again breaking its balls to 1up Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Allthegoodnames.JPG|thumb|135px|All the good names are taken...]]
[[Image:Wikipedia article Lucas 2.5.png|right|thumb|Articles about [[memes]] aren't allowed, but things like this are???]]
{{quote|If I told you [[I Has a Bucket|I had a bucket]] and showed you the bucket, would you ask for a newspaper article to prove I had a bucket?|[[bucket Seal|210.9.136.63]] (talk) 12:53, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}{{quote|Yes. Yes, we would. That's the way it works on Wikipedia.|Jew (talk · contribs) 12:57, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}
Currently Wikipedia contains [[over 9000|4.8 million]] [[English]] articles, 4.8 million of which are [[Plagiarism|plagiarized]] from [[ED]], [[Britain|Encyclopedia Britannica]], or [[Futa]] sites. After edits from various [[moderator|admins, editors,]] [[trolls]] and [[vandals]], only 343 articles remain at least 50% factually accurate. This leaves Wikipedia on an academic par with "[[Star Wars]]: Incredible Cross-Sections: The Ultimate Guide to Star Wars Vehicles and Spacecraft" and "My First Book of Animals from A to Z". All reputable universities and high schools have permabanned the use of Wikipedia in academic citations.

Wikipedia has a policy that all articles in it needs a [[NPOV|neutral point of view]], but in reality it is a doublespeak that basically means "Write in a pro-[[communist]], pro-[[Israel]], pro-[[Liberalism]] view", which is the exact reverse of neutrality. No wonder all the [[SJW]]s, Jewish Activists and [[Narcissist]] power maniacs are attracted to it.

Wikipedia has a concept called WikiLove and has a policy of "[[Ass|ass-u-me]] good faith" amongst its contributors. This is a vital policy because there is no good faith among any of [[Wikipedos]], so it is necessary to at least pretend that the other guy isn't out there to be an asshole.

Wikipedia's new March 2007 rules demand that an administrator proves he has a higher (PhD) degree if he [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/03/12/technology/12wiki.html claims] he has one. So far that [[bullshit]] [[lie]] to the public has not been enforced.

Wikipedia has very weak armor and only a level 3 shield. Thus, they are open to a flanking attack from pretty much anybody. And since they have about eighty updates per second, it's easy for a small but fatally incorrect change to slip through unnoticed. Also, Wikipedia is quite prone to [[hivemind]], since everybody wants to be an [[admin]], and disagreeing with Wikipedia admins is an easy way to not become one.

The [[administrators]] of Wikipedia are generally open-source advocates and therefore tend to have no knowledge of how to run a successful website. They are constantly arguing with each other over how often the [[GNAA]] Wikipedia article should be nominated for [[VFD|Articles for Deletion]] section, disregarding the [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines]] which prevent multiple attempts. They delete the important sites, but keep the [[bullshit]]. Like: '''{{wikilink|Fart_lighting|Fart lighting}}'''.

Actually, the only thing in which Wikipedia [[fap|beats]] [[ED]] in is a higher percentage of [[vandal]] users. For a prime example, see: [[Sceptre]].

Contributors to Wikipedia are not valued. Bimbo Wales has said that editing is a privilege, so you are not really donating your time by editing articles. Most contributions (images, text, etc.) are actually [[deleted]], and the users with the most power ([[Administrators]], Bureaucrats, etc.) contribute the least content to the site. The site is so [[shitty]] that it is pointless to try to improve it. The best way to fix it would be to just delete it and start over.

{{squote|Wikipedia is a stalking mill designed to stroke the egos of social reprobates and other fringe groups who don't belong in [[normal]] society. The people who are there long term and essentially live there for the most part fit the profiles of true sociopaths.

[[Jimbo Wales|Wales]] developed a great gaming system on Wikipedia which he uses to attract the dregs of society -- people who don't have lives are who aspire to be "famous and great" are [h]is marks and he's come up with a rat maze to lure in the stupid, lonely, and ignorant.

I've been famous and in the public eye for what now -- 15 years? I have to say, power, fame, and attribution are overrated. There's a simple wisdom is simply accepting who you are and being happy about it. None of the psychos on Wikipedia seem happy, it's a perpetual [[war]] zone and highly competitive. But what eludes all of them is the [[cheese]] at the end of the maze -- there is none -- just the smell of cheese.

Wales and his cronies just [[whore]] all of these idiots through their "Wikigame" (The site is an online gaming system essentially -- see who can get to the end as an "[[Admin]]" or "Arbitor"). Wikimedia then cashes in on everyone's hard work.

When was the last time Wales took one of his admins to get a massage in a russian house of ill repute on Wikimedia's dime? But HE DOES.

Bottom line, its a bunch of morons being used to run his business for free, while his cronies back at the Wikimedia offices cash in on everyones hard work and pay themselves 300K+ salaries per year,{{citation needed | date= July 2013}} divert and misappropriate the funds and live the good life by living in fancy hotels and eating fancy meals while the rest of the stupid schmucks live in their mom's basement or their trailer parks in New Jersey and Alabama while Wales and his cronies cash in on YOUR HARD WORK.

It's got to be the second biggest scam after [[Linux]] development. Linus Torvalds has a similar model. Let people "contribute" so they feel good about themselves, while the project and site owners rake in the [[$]][[$]][[$]].|{{archive|Vk4A4|Jeff Merkey}}'''}}
===The Never-Ending Story===
A common misconception is that "Wikipedia is never finished." Remember, each Wikipedia article you come across was forged from the blood of thousands of angsty [[teenager]]s [[edit war|edit warring]] over really important facts about the world.

The real problem with Wikipedia is the Wikipedians. From players to sysops, every member of its community is the scum of the internets - worse than spammers, worse than [[script kiddies]] and [[Nigeria|Nigerian scammers]], and worse than [[IRC]]ers. The average Wikipedia user has the '''{{wptl|122.148.180.50/Archive|intelligence of a seal}}''', and '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Smegma_Penis02.mirrored.jpg|bathes or showers once a month}}'''.

Wikipedia is full of people with no desire to improve what it is intended for, information. Instead, they want to grow their [[e-penis]] and one day become a [[mod]].

The only way to save the Wikipedia [[MMORPG]] is to delete all usernames and only allow two players to be its administrators: [[Grawp]] and [[Willy on Wheels]]. All other accounts will be reduced to powerless IP addresses. Its' users will then continuing their bitching and pedantic arguing. [[Tosh.0|Tosh]] had the right idea: get over there and post some fucked up shit.
{{clear}}
===Reliability===
{{main|Mechanophilia#Legality|Mechanophilia}}
[[Image:Wikipedia-oxymoron-example.png|thumb|right|220px|Example of self-perceived reliability at Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Wikipedia atomic bomb bias.jpg|thumb|right|200px|The good people of wikipedia handle history's most complicated issues with an opened mind and detached objectivism.]]
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>kFBDn5PiL00</youtube>
<center>'''Michael Scott On Wikipedia'''}}</center>
 
In 2007, a variety of scandals began to surface from within Wikipedia. Mainstream news organizations began to openly discuss the common public perception that Wikipedia is "unreliable." In a sophisticated experiment, it was demonstrated googling "Wikipedia" and "unreliable" generated more than 502,000 "hits". In contrast, a similar search using "Encyclopedia Dramatica" and "unreliable" generated barely more than 300 "hits", with most of these being self-deprecating jokes of humility from Encyclopedia Dramatica editors. Thus, it was scientifically proven that Wikipedia is much, much more unreliable (see graphic). Anyone in the world can edit Wikipedia, which means you know you are getting information from the best source possible.
{{clear}}
====Acceptable Sources====
Wikipedia has very strict standards regarding the sources you can use when editing. The following is a list of some of the most common ones.
*[[The Guardian]]
*[[Daily Kos]]
*Huffington Post
*Junge Welt
*KCNA
*PinkPaper UK
*[[Michael Moore]] documentaries
*Countdown, with [[Keith Olbermann]]
*Anything by [[Noam Chomsky]]
*Some stupid [[nigger]]'s asshole
*Anything licked or stolen by [[Jews]]
Additionally, many editors simply cite obscure books that no one owns. That way, no one will ever be able to prove they're totally bullshitting.
{{clear}}

====Pornography====
[[Image:jwales.jpg|right|175px]]
So great is the amount of porn on Wikipedia it (almost) rivals [[ED]] - a [[fact]] made all the more pathetic by the fact ED is made by and for [[basement-dwellers]] and those with a disgusting sense of humour whereas Wikipedia is genuinely trying to educate people.[citation needed] Here is a list of the very full articles dedicating to proving that sad fact:
*<big>[[Wikipedia Porn]]</big>
*<big>[[Wikipedia's Greatest Hits Sex]]</big>
*<big>[[Virgin Killer]]</big> For all you Loli-lovers.
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===WP:Admins control universal truth===
{{main|The Wikipedia Jews}}
Wikipedia mods come trolling the world from the heyday of the page between retards <s>and the search results of [[Google]]</s>. Mankind has been trolled in its entirety by no more than a bunch of anal-[[rape]]d Aspies, who just log in for World Domination. Unsurprisingly, among those interested in world domination are psychological warfare experts from [[Mossad]] and the [[JIDF|JIDF,]] who relentlessly insert [[Israel|Israeli]] propaganda into every article that they can find, and ruthlessly suppress anything critical of ZOG's schemes. The magic of the Electronic Dictatorial Totalitarian Democracy, all in the name of volunteering for the [[NOT|best idea of the world for an encyclopedia]]. Long Live Wikipedia!.
{{clear}}

=== What is "wiki lawyering"? ===
When an administrator or an editor liked by the administrators cites policy, it's considered valid. When an unwanted user cites policy, it's "Wikilawyering" or "bludgeoning", regardless of the validity of the arguments, so it can be dismissed and tossed down the moat.

=== Inconsistently applied policy ===
Wikipedia deletion policy states subjects have no say on the deletions of their own articles.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Criteria_for_speedy_deletion#Non-criteria Wikipedia:Criteria for speedy deletion § Non-criteria] (as of December 18, 2023)</ref> As so often on Wikipedia, policy is not applied consistently, making it pointless.

In this example, [[satanism|satanist]] [[Michael Aquino]] was able to request the deletion of the article about himself. [[Guy Chapman]], then an administrator, considered it a valid reason.<ref>[http://archive.today/2016.11.30-051001/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Michael_Aquino&oldid=232504731 Wikipedia:Articles for deletion / Michael Aquino (archive 2016-11-30)]</ref>

<gallery>
File:Exemptions from Wikipedia policy - Michael Aquino deletion.png ‎ | (Click to expand)
</gallery>

===Hivemind===
{{main|Wikipedia Admin Gallery}}
[[Image:Wikipedia1984.gif|thumb|right|220px|A satirical GIF that [https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?title=Special%3ALog&page=File%3AWhambo_in_%2784.gif was censored by Commons' kindness brigade]. "Porn = Good. Satire = Bad."]]
[[Image:Wikimania stallman keynote2.jpg|220px|thumb|right|[[RMS]] loves Wikipedia. No other commentary is needed.]]

[[Wikipedophile]]s, especially [[sysops]] and recent patrollers, share a hivemind. They all think alike, act alike, and no matter how abusive a member of the hivemind is, they always support it. Those of the hivemind look like they are [[sock puppet]]s, but they actually communicate telepathically.

In 2005, like a colony of bees, the hivemind recognized that those outside the collective had their own individuality. Now they are a complete collective consciousness like the Borg and no longer believe identity exists outside the collective. To them, everyone is fake, an illusion; an actor who has no thoughts, emotions, viewpoints, etc. and must be eliminated/assimilated and until then they do it is viewed as [[trolling]]. Any expression of individuality is [[banned]] as trolling or, to use a common wikipodadminism, "disruption." See: [[Don't feed the trolls]] and '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Don't_Feed_the_Divas#How_to_deal_with_a_Wikipedia_Diva|Don't Feed the Divas}}''', especially the last sentence, which crushes what little self-esteem you may have:

<center>''"In some cases, the diva will stay retired, '''but the loss will be quickly filled by other editors who are not so high maintenance; editors for whom the goal is not self promotion and validation, but rather improvement of the project."'''''</center>

The hivemind extends outside Wikipedia as well, on those rare occasions that an admin strays onto another forum. A good way to start a [[flamewar]] with them is to hint, suggest, joke, outright state or otherwise insinuate that Wikipedia is anything less than the greatest academic achievement since the library of Alexandria.

Thus, because of the Hivemind, Wikipedia has immunized itself against any criticism. Of course, the corollary to this immunity, according to themselves, is because so many people are part of it, it can't be controlled. Due to the amount of participants, real criticism will come from inside. Yeah, that'll happen. Criticize the Hivemind at your own peril, because the Hivemind controls the power to delete your edits, to ban you, and to railroad you from social advancement (as [[SlimVirgin]] did to Gracenotes).

*When ED criticized Wikipedia, ED was site-banned in their '''{{wikilink|MediaWiki:Spam-blacklist|"spam" blacklist}}'''.
*When Wikipedia Review criticized Wikipedia, the Monkey-Fucker Cabal removed all links under some kind of definition of "no personal attacks".
*Wikipediocracy published [https://wikipediocracy.com/2013/02/26/russavia-is-scott-bibby-is-russiansafetycards/ a blog entry] about how [https://www.roger-pearse.com/weblog/2013/03/12/dishonesty-at-wikipedia-they-dont-like-it-up-em-sir/ fucked-up] Wikipedia is, and was [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MediaWiki%3ASpam-blacklist&diff=543691461&oldid=542603600 stuck on the "spam blacklist"].
*"Real newspapers" like ''The Register'' criticize them, and the chant goes out "[https://lists.wikimedia.org/pipermail/wikien-l/2007-July/077064.html Ban them, ban them, ban them...]"
*Watch out ''New York Times'', [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/01/magazine/01WIKIPEDIA-t.html you're next].
{{clear}}
====Recent Changes Patrolling (RC Patrolling)====
{{main|Recent changes patrol}}
[[Image:Paranoid.jpg|thumb|200px|The average recent change patroller is infected by the [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|USI]]-virus.]]
Why the fuck would anyone want to patrol for recent changes? The articles are usually dull. Patrolling edits on Wikipedia is [[boring]] as hell. The only reason is to [[troll]]. Cuckolded administrators delete everything believing they are cyber judges (though [[IRL]] judges at least pretend to follow a set of rules) after their wives have refused to touch their cocks. (Just kidding, 80% of the fat little bastards aren't married and never will be. Lol.) If you actually attempt to post facts on Wikipedia and an RC patroller doesn't like it, they will use any sort of retarded excuses to revert or just call it vandalism. Failing this, they will attempt to make your argument invalid through the power of [[some argue]].

RC Patrollers usually use scripts to search for specific things. They're actually very bad at catching vandalism in articles ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MONGO&diff=prev&oldid=67472921 this one] went unnoticed for 17 days and '''{{archive|h6Bfu|this}}''' went unnoticed for ''two'' years!), but very effective at finding anyone criticizing admins in talk pages where such criticism is reverted and the person banned forever. Real vandalism lingers and festers until years later, that account pisses an admin off - and it is only through [[wikistalking]] that [[Pedobear|Wikipedophiles]] are able to find [[vandalism]] at all.

Some RC Patrollers are also huge [[hypocrite]]s because they are also vandals. These [[fake editors]] include Konstable and [[Blu Aardvark]].
{{clear}}
====The Asperger Cancer====
{{main|Asperger's Syndrome}}
[[Image:Anders-behring-breivik_bawwww2.jpg|thumb|[[Anders Breivik]] has an edit reverted. ([https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/norway/9209392/Anders-Behring-Breivik-my-tears-were-for-Norway.html 2012])]]
Any observant new user to Wikipedia will soon ask themselves "What's with all the running 'lists' of inane bullshit? I don't need to see a list of Russian deep fat fryer models built in 1963. Why are the administrators social misfits with little sense of wisdom or good judgement? Does Jimbo know of this [[faggotry]]?" The answer to both questions is that Wikipedia attracts [[Asperger]] zombies like flies to [[shit]].

These basement dwelling [[virgins]] have alienated millions of [[normal]] people from Wikipedia. They take out their [[asperger]] [[rage]] for their hundreds of school yard beatdowns and permanent sexual isolation on the rest of us. It is believed that many of these [[faggot]]s ''cannot even talk'' in real life. Jimbo can't stand these robots, but their problems are harnessed by Wikipedia as unpaid labor, which makes the [[profit]] for his [[hookers and blow]].

[[Asperger]] [[zombies]] are relatively easy to spot. They will be:
*[[White]], and male.
*Have their photo on their user page. Asptards have little sense of what is socially appropriate, and don't realize how '''{{wpul|H2g2bob|they come across}}'''. They mainly have '''{{wpul|J.delanoy|blank, asperger stares. This perma-virgin actually has a picture of himself with Jimbo}}'''.
*Their user page will be covered in checklists, "to do" tables, programming code, personal details, and generally look like a spreadsheet. Look at [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:MBisanz&oldid=338235254 this] fucknut's older page version, before he knew ED was looking and had found the ''"I fuck on the first date kid"'' all grown up (scroll down).
*Sometimes, those on the asperger/autism spectrum will openly declare their problem. '''{{wpul|Rainbowofpeace|"Rainbowofpeace"}}''', who obsessively edits articles about discrimination, helpfully tells us how he is an autistic gay Jew with ADHD. That's a high score on the ''[[Tumblr|Oppression olympics]]''!
*Favorite subjects include [[men's rights]], which were fought over constantly on TOW from its early days, and [[GamerGate]]. Because real human females won't talk to Cheeto-gobbling pimply 300-pound fans of Tolkien and [[My Little Pony]].

{{userbox
| border-c = #00000f
| id = HIV
| id-c = #000000
| id-fc = #ffffff
| id-s = 13
| info = '''This user has [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger syndrome]].
| info-c = #808080
}}
{{clear}}
====Notable Wikipedos====
{{main|Bureaucratic Fucks}}
*[[Ironholds]], former WP:IRC rockstar, now desysopped for [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Human_penis_size&diff=prev&oldid=46470687 vandalism] and for bringing the project into disrepute with such quotes as:
{{quote|[19:58] <Ironholds> You should however have instead taken your pen, punched a hole in her windpipe and looked on as her attempts to wave for help got increasingly feeble.}}
*[[ArbCom|GorillaWarfare]], one of his galpals
*[[Fluffernutter]], famous for her sexchats with Ironholds:
{{quote|<nowiki>19:59:11 < Fluff|laptop> you'd think he'd have figured hiow to slap asses by now, but nooo</nowiki> 
19:59:51 < tyw7> why is he slapping your ass? 
20:00:00 < Ironholds> tyw7: we're fucking 
<nowiki>20:00:02 < Fluff|laptop> why not? we DID say we're bored</nowiki>}}
*[[Tyciol]]
*[[AmericanDad86]], known for fighting everyone and being [[Gay|flamboyant]].
{{clear}}

=== Circumphilia - promotion of circumcision ===
[[File:Wikipedia guessing game.png|thumb|Can you guess which of these three paragraphs appeared on Wikipedia in 2022?<ref name=doesNotAffect>{{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision#Sexual_effects|20221030002924|title=Circumcision § Sexual effects - Wikipedia (October 30, 2022)}}</ref> ]]
[[file:wikipedia-benevolent-2040.png|thumb|In 2040, they will want you to forget all about it.]]

People hate what they can't have.

A significant portion of [[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|the people who get to decide who is allowed to edit]] had [[circumrape|the foremost part of their sexual organs cut off]] early in life, and secretly wish they had been allowed to keep it. However, they know that the day they will wake up as whole men with foreskins will never come. Therefore, all that is left to them to cope with their lack of foreskins is to deny the importance of the part they are missing, so they can feel like they don't miss out on much and inflate their confidence.

One of the most egregious [[:category:circumphiles|circumphiles]], the [[virgin|sexless]] [[basement dweller]] [[Jayjg]], was promoted into the [[Arbitration Committee|wiki kangaroo court]] in 2005 by no one less than the founder. Why would the founder do the dirty work with his hands if basement-dwelling low lives are willing to do it for free?

As one would expect, Wikipedia transformed into a circumphile spam machine over the following years. It would not take long until other circumphiles were promoted into positions of authority: Avraham to administrator in 2006 and bureaucrat in 2009, [[James Heilman]] to administrator in 2010, and Zad68 to administrator in 2013.

Whereas Wikipedia used to mention that foreskin is "a highly sensitive part of the penis" in 2004,<ref>{{wayback|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision|20040605200550|title=Circumcision - Wikipedia (June 5, 2004)}}</ref> anything negative about circumcision was quietly purged over the years. Wikipedia even went even as far in 2022 as to claim that circumcision does not affect sensitivity at all.<ref name=doesNotAffect />

[[File:Wikipedia circumcision 2004 2022.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Because this embarrassed Wikipedia, they had to switch coping strategies in 2023 to complicated mental gymnastics: ''"Circumcision doesn't actually affect sensitivity, it's just the attitude that affects the sensitivity[[oneoneone|!!1!!1!]]"''

[[File:Mental gymnastics to justify circumcision.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Looks like they can't make up their minds.

The administrators who are not circumphiles quietly tolerate the circumphilia.

Besides, what kind of person would have a positive attitude towards having had a part of their body cut off without their approval, especially as a defenseless infant?

[[File:Age of consent for circumcision - 0.png|thumb|center|Age of consent for circumcision: Zero.]]

=== Deletion count contests ===
Some administrators compete for the highest deletion count so they can proudly show it off to their peers on their user page. To inflate their deletion count, they seek any excuse they can find to delete pages. For example:

<gallery>
File:The proudest achievement in the miserable life of W-admin Liz.png|An administrator vengefully deletes over a hundred valid geographical articles because their author was blocked three years earlier over a minor incident.
File:Liz deletion count as of October 11th, 2023.png|Proudly presented on her user page.
</gallery>

Funnily enough, the deletion policy that would later be named ''WP:G5'', deletion of creations by an author disliked by the administrators, was a spontaneous and undiscussed invention in July 2003 by an early Wikipedia administrator, Martin Harper, who also happens to be a circumphile. This means ''WP:G5'' is a circumphile invention.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 Martin Harper invents what would later become WP:G5] ([http://archive.today/2021.05.28-134850/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 archive])</ref><ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 The early edit history of the "Circumcision" article] ([http://archive.today/2022.08.13-161256/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 archive]) shows the circumphilia of Martin Harper.</ref>

==TOW & ED==
{{main|ED vs TOW}}
''See also: [[Wikipedia_Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Encyclopedia Dramatica]], [[ED vs TOW]], and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:ED vs. Wikipedia]]''

[[Image:ED vs Wikipedia.jpg|thumb|left|ED [[OhInternet|had]] [[Tits or GTFO|tits]], therefore [[TOW]]-[[fanboy|fans]] are [[homosexual]]. You'll notice that ED is wearing a hat with a hammer and sickle, the symbol of the glorious Soviet Union.]]
[[Image:Slanderous_WHORES.JPG|thumb|Wikipedia, not biased about ED at all.]]
[[Image:ED on TOW.jpg|thumb|We're back!]]
[[Image:44407e8f.jpg|thumb|Even as a source, they still hate us.]]

It all started one day when [[Jameth]], typing with only his [[cock|penis]], attempted to enter the [[mediacrat]] drama as a Wikipedia entry. It was '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Mediacrat|discussed and denied}}'''. This act alone sparked the creation of the wiki [[you]] are reading right now. Far as you know, you chronic masturbator.

Every year, Wikipedians pretend that they are going to delete the [[Recovered|Encyclopedia Dramatica article]]. '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Occasionally}}''' they do for brief intervals, mostly on the grounds of hosting the previously-deleted [[Mediacrat]] entry, but usually they [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Encyclopedia_Dramatica&action=history wuss] '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|out}}''' of it. The fucks tried it '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica_(6th_nomination)|six times}}''' that are still visible; there were others, vanished by that pathetic anime dork Avery "Ashibaka" Morrow. He hates ED. (And it's extra-lulzy because he was also a major protector of the 4chan article, which was also subjected to endless editwars. But then he was a moderator on 4chan for a long time.....)

Have a look at the '''{{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica/Archive_1|first archive of the ED article talkpage}}'''. There were earlier ones bu the Wiki-faggots deleted them. Yes kids, Ashibaka, Sceptre and Mbisanz are whining little pussies hells yeah.

Wikipedia's steadfast refusal to host an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article has been the source of a great deal of hilarious [[drama]] on the site. Yet [[TOW]] continues to cover up any controversy associated with the topic and deny the creation of the article, even one that is unoffensive, informative, and well written. Wikipedia has articles on [[Bukkake]], [[Goatse]], [[2 Girls 1 Cup]], an extensive disambiguation page on [[dong]]s (including a page on a male [[porn]] star named '''{{wikilink|Long_Dong_Silver|"Long Dong Silver"}}'''), and [[God]] knows what else. However, they have refused to allow a page on [[ED]] simply out of spite.

Update: Last closing argument (aside from [[Sceptre]]'s faggotry):
{{squote|Encyclopedia Dramatica – Reclosing this for the second time. We have a consensus - i.e we want to see an extremely well written draft with impeccable sources before we touch this again.|Spartaz Humbug! 19:54, 3 May 2008 (UTC)}}

<center>
<big>'''[[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|DISREGARD THIS SECTION]], [[TOW]] [[Fellatio|SUCKS]] [[COCKS]]'''</big>

'''An''' {{wikilink|Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Encyclopedia Dramatica article}} '''has been up on Wikipedia, in all its lulztastic, properly sourced and cited glory since''' {{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica|at least May 2010}}.
</center>

As expected, it took only a few hours for many [[Wikipedo]]s to go into childlike tantrums, thus forcing yet another deletion review, deletion review number 57 to be exact. The topic of this deletion review is to determine the validity of sources. When the article was created, the source list was actually larger than the article itself, but this has since been trimmed down for a number of arbitrary reasons, the most prevalent being that TOW's editors are unable to live up to their own retarded rules. However, the overall consensus is that the article should stay and that anyone who says otherwise is a [[hypocrite]] who is simply [[butthurt]] over ED's treatment of [[TOW]] and its editors and fails to realize that this immature behavior will only further the problem.
{{clear}}
====Wikipedia's Content Vs. Encyclopedia Dramatica's Content====
*Wikipedia relies on verifiability, not truth. ED relies on the lulz, and baseless jokes don't make good satire.
*Wikipedia does not rely on primary sources, and hates academic sources. ED would post a photo from your high school yearbook if it's lulzy enough.
*Activists use Wikipedia to skew articles to try to get [[NORP]] sympathy. ED shits on everyone for the sake of cheap jokes.
*Wikipedos will argue by throwing around abbreviations. EDiots will laugh at you and mock your argument.
*Wikipedia lets shitposters like [[Ryulong]] run rampant. ED has no problem telling its own [[Girlvinyl|founder]] to fuck off.
*Wikipedia is almost always online. ED goes down every other day or some shit.
This section needs no witty dick jokes. Wikipedia is a giant punchline.
{{clear}}
===Tips On Vandalizing Wikpedia===
{{Main|Vandal/How-to}}
*Subtly insert false info, such as changing a person's birth date from 1970 to 1990, or insert info that is not obviously false, like: "x was a distant cousin of Bill Gates."
*Make a new account every time you vandalize, so that even if you are caught, the admin can't revert all your past vandalisms.
*Vandalize articles that are not actively watched by a lot of editors, such as biography of obscure living persons.
*Always create an informative edit summary for your edits. For extra points, make up a spiffy character set with nonbreaking spaces...
:*Examples: ▲ ʙ ɮ Ⅽ Ⅾ ∈ Ⅎ Ғ Ɠ ╠╣ℍ █ ▄█ K █▄ █▀█▀█ █▀█ ●  ℙ ☭ Ⓡℙℝ ▄█▀ ▀█▀ █▄█ ▀▄▀ █▄█▄█ ✖ 匕 ▀█▄ ● ❛❜ This will help your edits look super respectable!
{{clear}}
===[[Power Word|Power Words]]===
Employ the following words to increase your wiki [[bullshit|credibility]]:
*'''{{wikilink|Camel_notation|CamelCase}}''' - Sticking two words together to form the silhouette of a [[vagoo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Antisemitic_canard|Canard}}''' - some sort of Jew bird that eats fetuses and desecrates churches.
*Good faith - A codeword for the [[13 year old boy]]s for which wikipedians are on the prowl.
*[[Portmanteau]] - A sexual device used by wikipedians to have buttsecks regardless of gender or disability.
*Schism - A euphemism for a [[catfight]].
*Shoa - a mythical tale of an effeminate mustachioed hero who defeats a horde of greedy beasts.
*Admonish - To tie up and make gay manlove with the one that doesn't have complete faith in the Church of Jimbo.
*Redact - To run circles around a pole until exhaustion
*Coatrack - A maniacal stick use by wikipedians to hang their coats on.
*Disambiguation - A process whereby someone who is unsure about their sexuality undergoes painful gender reassignment surgery.
{{clear}}
===<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{wikilink|Template:Unblock|Unblock}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>??===
[[Image:Howtobanappeal.png|thumb|{{Unblock}<nowiki>}</nowiki> hard at work.]]
This is template you use to ask to be unblocked. After you've been blocked for no reason, you swallow your pride and ask that someone undo it. You then wait for an hour until some 15-year-old denies your request without even looking at it. Sometimes, if you insist arguing, they will block you as well from editing your user talk page, without banning you, for their own private [[wikipedo]] "[[lulz]]". At that point you can only appeal the block by email (which they will probably ignore as the jerks full of themselves they are) which can/will eventually be blocked as well.

If you get banned by an admin don't even bother using this because no matter how well-reasoned the <nowiki>{{unblock}}</nowiki> request, it always gets declined. Like <s>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User_talk:81.153.223.189&oldid=142952978 this one]</s> (dead): ''"HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A TROLL M0RESCHI YOU STUPID BASTARD! AFTER WHAT YOU FUCKING DID YOU DESERVE TO BE SHOT!"'' Clearly the person has proven their point, but the [[bureaucratic fuck|bureaucratic fucks]] are immune to reason or logic. If your request is declined, you may get a lame reason.

Whenever you edit on Tor and the node is blocked, always put an unblock message on that IP claiming it's no longer Tor. Sometimes they even get fooled. Admin said, "First time I've seen such a request where the user was telling the [[truth]]."
====Zaiger's <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> Request====
For absolutely no good reason, ED's own [[User:Zaiger|Zaiger]] was given [[ban|life with no parole in Ban L&]] by the ban-happy cockz at Wikipedia.
{{quote|You have been blocked indefinitely from editing for abuse of editing privileges|Lies}}
In one last fighting breath, Zaiger submitted an appeal using the <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> template to try and parole out, but to no avail.
{{quote|What I see here is you trying to blame someone else for your own problems.
...that doesn't mean that you are automatically pardoned for your own bad behavior.|Wikidouches}}
Thankfully, no one cares about Zaiger.
{{clear}}
===Easy [[eBay]] Profits: Admin Farms===
{{main|eBay}}
[[Image:Damn furries wikipedia.jpg|thumb|410px|right|A [[wikipedophile]] put this up on Jimbo Wales's talk page to complain about [[admin abuse]] by [[furries]] in kangaroo suits (look nearly real, don't they?). Jimbo avoided the discussion with a [[banhammer|banning]].]]

While shouting "op me" is an easy way to become an op on IRC, in Wikipedia it takes a little more work (but only a little more). The purpose of becoming an admin is to sell your account on eBay. ([http://wikipediareview.com/lofiversion/index.php/t204.html 2006])
#Make a new account using dial-up or AOL, not proxies. These are the easiest ways to sock puppet and still use your other accounts for things like removing inaccuracies from Wikipedia.
#Create a user page so you look legit. The easy way is to fill it with [[userboxes]] until it looks like ribbons on a third-world military dictator. If you just copy somebody else's userpage, you will get caught. Then write up a fake bio that says, "Hi I'm only 12 and want to be an admin some day." Most admins on Wikipedia are too young to grow pubes, so you have to be in their age group. They never vote for anyone old enough to date.
#Don't question anything. Behave like a robot. Get one of those anti-vandal scripts and have it auto-revert while you sleep. Always revert: (1) Someone who reverts an admin—if you're lucky you'll occasionally beat somebody else to this (2) IP address users—because these are all vandals and sockpuppets (3) New contributors—because they don't understand Wikipedia (4) Anyone who has ever been banned before, even for an hour, because they're permanently shitlisted. Now don't worry about wrongly reverting any of these people, it happens all the time. Just say it was a mistake. No one in charge likes these people anyway. Learn the abbreviations for policy pages like WP:NPOV and WP:NOT and use them in your edit summaries. Nobody will care whether your usage makes sense. On talk pages, if someone asks a question, tell them that their statement is original research, speculation, and that Wikipedia is not a forum. Act like it is serious business.
#After a few hundred fake edits, go to the [[VFD|articles for deletion]] every day.
#Next, go to votes for adminship; always vote to support, so those people will vote to support you. This should be obvious. Admins like people who support admins and hate those who are critical of admins.
#When you reach 4,000 edits, go to ''requests for adminship'' and nominate yourself: Poof! you're an admin!!!
#Then go to eBay and auction it. Make sure the reserve price is over $1,000 so you don't sell it cheap.
#Until the auction ends, don't just do nothing or they'll know it's an eBay sale. Use the account for things like POV-pushing, banning any of the four shitlisted types you used to only revert (by any, I mean every user you can find). But if you're too busy, just find someone complaining about admins and ban them forever and lock their talk page; actually you have to do this at least once every day, or else somebody will think the admin account was hacked.

'''If you want to keep your account and not sell it:'''
#Get a life.
#If that fails, do the most respected admin activity, encourage vandalism. Vandalism is the only way you can justify your job. If there weren't so many vandals, there would be 4 admins. So get your script out and just ban randomly. Be sure to lock the user's talk page. If you see the user come back on, hide what they write and explain that they are a "sockpuppeting troll", ban them forever, and lock their talk page.
#Don't bother fighting vandals now. You've got the equivalent of a government job: you can't get fired, only transferred. Become a copycat of Willy on Wheels and you'll only get a new account.

'''Fun activities to do as admin:'''
#Mess with the '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:MediaWiki_namespace|MediaWiki namespace}}'''.
#Ban other admins for [[lulz]].
#Replace Wikipedia articles with ED ones. It improves accuracy.
#Unban all the [[Willy on Wheels]] accounts. Or just clear the entire ban list.
#[[Goatse]] the Main Page.

===Heroes===
[[Image:Yourmission.jpg|frame|When dealing with [[Willy on Wheels]], it is [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines|Wikipedia policy]] to take it seriously.]]

All over [[teh internets]], people complain about the bad things of Wikipedia; that they're all child molesters, Homeland Security agents, Zionist propagandists, furries, Jimbo Wales' alter ego is [[GreenRaeper]] (founder of [[WikiFur]]), how official policy permits admin abuse "[[is not a bug, it's a feature]]", and that there are news articles constantly on how they make [[snuff]] films with young boys. But nobody notices the heroes of the site:
*[[The Colbert Report|Stephen Colbert]].
*[[Don Murphy]]
*[[Willy on Wheels]]
*Señor Pelican Shit - /b/rave soldier who researched and documented [[Pelican Shit]] to a new level, a serious concern still affecting Wikipedia.
*Autofellatio Professor - Helped many people '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Autofellatio_2.jpg|Autofellatio_2.jpg}}'''.
*[[Publicgirluk]] uploaded some pictures of herself to illustrate relevant articles and got called a troll by the master [[wikipedo]] wealthy pornographer for her trouble.
*THE MOTHERFUCKING JUGGERNAUT BITCH!! reputed for massive AOL autoblocks.
*[[Blu Aardvark|Jew Aardvark]] Wikipedia Jews masturbate to his photos.
*Squidward, the fastest vandal west of the Mississippi, known for harvesting more open [[proxies]], creatin more sockpuppets than Bomis has porn. He is king gypsy who lives in [[Chicago]] by the lake. He hates Antandrus, Avraham & others <s>[http://antandrus.tripod.com/ as proved by his crappy website</s> (lol down)]. The Wikipedia Jews are always on the lookout to raep him. Slap that foreskin, homes.
*'''{{wpul|Hephaestos|Mike Garcia}}''' - high class of vandalism since 2003 (get a life!) <blockquote>''"He is currently one of Wikipedia's most promising vandals. He appears to be persistent, creative, and knows to vandalize pages that will be seen by many people. One day, he may even be considered in a class along with the great Willy on Wheels, but he will need to "diversify" his vandalism before this can happen. Almost all of his vandalism has been to the English Wikipedia; a good piece of advice to him would be to start attacking admins' user pages on some of the foreign language Wikis. His recent vandalism of the [[Wookieepedia]] shows that he has begun this diversification process already. Mike, you possess a great deal of talent; the sky's the limit for you!"''</blockquote>
*[[Cplot]]--500 [[sockpuppets]] and counting, clowns!
*[[Professor Tim Pierce]] teaches his students how to make the most of a wiki.
*Wikipedia Is [[Communism]].
*That guy who wrote [[Hyldenism]].
*[[Grawp]]
*Avril Troll
*Anybody who has earned a spot '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:List_of_banned_users|here}}'''. (Note that the top list expose the wrath actions from the King himself, to spread fear among vassals)
*Undercover users from here, allied sites.
*[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[Hagger]]
*[[ByAppointmentTo]]
*[[hipcrime]]
*[[Anonymous]] member of [[ArbCom]] who [https://wikipediocracy.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=2832 whipped Wikipediocracy into a fury] when he ''"tried to hack into the site"'' by means of [http://wikipediocracy.com:2082/ following] a [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/account/cpanel redirect] from his control panel to the site's host where he asked for the domain [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/forgot password to be reset]. They were thinking about calling the FBI!

==Wikipedia IRC==
{{main|Freenode}}
The Wikipedia [[IRC]] chat is a fun place to watch [[Wikipedophile]]s discuss criticism of the project while banning the critics, although a more likely discussion will involve eating Christian babies, banning other users to get their rocks off. A fun way to troll Wikipedia IRC channels is to announce that you are logging the channel. For some reason, Wikimediots raise strong objections to the [[GNAA|publication of chat logs]], so be sure to do it often. Just like [[Daniel Brandt]].

And whatever you do, DO NOT LAUGH AT ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA.

===Lulzy IRC===
====One:====
<Slowking_Man> DCC SEND exploit = kline
<-- Slowking_Man has quit (Killed by Rez (This connection has violated network policy.))
<-- WikiTeke has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CXI has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CakeProphet has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- Poore5 has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))

====The only thing remotely funny ever from #wikipedia====
<pre><VegaDark> what's that one disorder called when a person looks like a kid all their life
<mavhk> VegaDark: infant death
</pre>

==Summation==
Generally speaking, Wikipedia is the compendium of all human knowledge, both true and false. Except of course where groups (i.e. [[Furluminati]], [[The Wikipedia Jews]]) go around turning arrays of articles into propaganda and bullshit.

Contrast:
*"Welcome to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit." - Wikipedia front page.
*"[Wikipedia] is not a place where people have the inherent right to edit" - Jimbo Wales, October 29, 2007. ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents/My_desysop_of_Zscout370&oldid=168329048#Public_apology Source])

==Gallery==
{{cg|Wikipedia|wikigallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikipediababy.jpg|Some people never learn.
File:Highesthonor.jpg|The highest medal of honor a TOW editor can hope to achieve after years of "hard work".
File:Wikiwank - terraforming venus.png|Edited by lonely spergs, you say?
File:That_time_Wikipedia_considered_memory-holing_c._m._killings.png|100 million people died from communist mass killings? Nah, who cares?
File:Never forget what they wanted us to believe - Wikipedia 2022.png|Never forget what they wanted us to believe.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Barack obama ns.jpg|Wikipedia is [[racist]]!
Image:George bush bdi.jpg|If wikipedia says so...
Image:Brokenwikipedia.JPG|breaking the format is always fun.
Image:Wikipedia Spanking.jpeg|Typical Wikipedia Articles
Image:SillyWikipedo.jpg|Sometimes it doesn't need to be vandalized.
Image:Typicalwikipedia.jpg|Another classic of pedantic [[Metzizah b’peh|pedophilic]] Jew-oriented gobbledygook
Image:Trolledwiki.PNG|An example of Wikipedia being trolled
Image:WWII_cite_source.png|Citation or it didn't happen.
Image:Whatusuallywikipedialookslike.jpg|What Wikipedia usually looks like.
Image:wikiblock.jpeg|Many ED users are familiar with this page.
Image:Wikifail.PNG|An example of Wikipedia's [[bullshit|superior intelligence]].
Image:wikipediacontent.jpg|Breakdown of Wikipedia content
Image:BNB rules.jpg|Standard Wikipedia policy
Image:Historian.png|Typical Wikipedia user. Note the [[unix beard]]
Image:Angelislulz.JPG|What happens when the Wiki main page isnt protected.....again.
Image:wikipediaattack.jpg|Proof that Wikipedia is full of [[Jews]] and [[Pedophiles]].
Image:Wikipe-tan sockpuppet show.png|[[Wikipe-tan]] is sooooooooo [[kawaii]] [[desu]]! [[^_^|^O^]]
Image:MarkOfAWitch.jpg|unfunny vandalism is not reverted
Image:Lulz_Wikipedia_Donation.JPG|[[Anonymous]] Japanese hit back at racist Wikipedia.
Image:TOW racism1.PNG|[[TOW]] demonstrating their strict gb2nigger policy.
Image:Wikipedia Return to The Kitchen.jpg
Image:Jimbo and Wikipe-tan.jpg| [[Jimbo Wales|Jimbo]] loves [[loli]].
Image:Iluvdrawing.jpg|Wikipedia [[retard|love the mentally challenged]].
Image:Wikipediavirusgames.jpg|[[Cat girl]] [[wikipedos]] invade [[World of Warcraft|MMOs]]! next they e-[[rape]] kidz!
Image:Ned Scott Wikipedia professionalism.png|A genuine beacon of [[e-penis|professionalism]]. Unless you're a [[fucktard|holier-than-thou pretentious asshole]], i.e. 99.9994% of all Wikipedian regulars.
Image:Stfuned.jpg|Professionalism thrown back.
File:911 Wiki Vandal.png
Image:TOW_Motivational_Poster.jpg|'''TOW's''' Mission Statement.
Image:Wikijudaism.png|Revered the world over as an accurate, objective source of knowledge.
Image:Wikipedia_admin.jpg|Good for a [[banhammer|perma-ban]] anytime!
Image:YouHaveTwoCowsWikipediaStyle.jpg|Proof that [[Wikipedos]] are drawhores.
Image:Egg.jpg|This is your brain on Wikipedia
Image:Blocked per Linda Mack.JPG|Say the magic words and it's banhammer time!
Image:DocWPNOR.jpg|You're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.
File:Wikipedialiberals.jpg|Wikipedia has a leftist bias.
Image:Wikipron.jpg|The hottest pron on Wikipedia!
Image:Comparison.jpg|Reliability comparison.
Image:Blackpeopleshouldntbeallowedtovote.png
Image:Hodgemanssf.jpg|The book version of TOW, in addition to being the best thing ever.
Image:Chucknorrisgg1.jpg|Epic Edit!
Image:wikitalklulz.JPG|Editing often leads to sensible discussion on TOW.
Image:Evenwikisays.jpg|Pool's Closed, it are a fact. I read it on Wiki.
Image:Mudkipswiki.JPG|
Image:Wikirule.gif|Masters of their domain.
Image:Barnstarwikip.jpg|Some wikipedia users will do anything for a barnstar.
Image:TOW_originality.JPG|TOW [[divide by zero|implodes on its intellectual property]]
Image:4chanwiki.jpg|Acknowledged by the WikiJews
File:Suckmycock.jpg|Wikipedia sucks cocks
Image:Poundcake.jpg|Wikipedia style guide for esoteric topics
Image:Wiki-Pedos.PNG|Proof that Wikipedia is ran by Paedophiles
Image:Username removed.gif|[[Grawp]], whose username is removed, and then the "username removed" label is struck out for extra effectiveness.
Image:Wikilulz.png|Wikipedia at its best.
Image:Just like wikipedia.jpg|Just like Wikipedia, only 2 out of every 40 "women" are actually female.
Image:EditBragg.jpg|Now [[you]] can make shit up about Pulitzer Prize winning writers - who also make shit up!
Image:BarrackGoebells.JPG|The new president is a black nazi!!!
Image:Cumshotbush.JPG|YES, THATS A CUMSHOT!
Image:Putin.jpg|The russian President
Image:Wikipedia donate amount.jpg|Any penny donation is appreciated
Image:Wikidonationplea.jpg|Nothing is obvious for Wikipedians
Image:Racistgoogle.png
Image:Wikitroll.jpg
Image:Wikihentai.jpg| A 'Quality Image' according to Wikipedia
Image:Wikipedia_Recent_Changes_Spam_Spamming.png | lrn2/wiki newfags
Image:Wikipedia_-_The_Wikipediatrician.jpg|The Wikipediatrician
Image:Wikipedia_-_Your_One_Stop_Research_Stop.jpg
Image:Wiki-deathstar.png
Image:WIKIPEDIA DONATION BANNER SCREENSHOT IRONIC.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA WIKIPE-TAN.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA STEAMER PIX REQUEST.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA KANGAROO USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST.jpg
File:Wikipediaredirectjews.PNG
File:Wikipedialulz.jpg
File:WikipediaNeutralPOV.jpg
File:Wikiwrong.jpg
File:Juno2.png|Wikipedia is about imparting information about important topics!
File:Wikipedia article glenn campbell time i get to phoenix math.png|Cool story, bro
File:Wikipedia feminist propaganda campaign.png|Now imagine how many propaganda teams '''don't''' advertise
File:Wikipedia edit-a-thon hispanic heritage month 2017.jpg|And another!
Image:Gwash.png|Classic. Wikipedia controls Google.
Image:Jackson is dead.jpg|[[Michael Jackson|MJ]] is dead even on Wikipedia.
Image:Wikipedia-lolcat.jpg|[[Redundant|Why Wikipedia is full of shit.]]
Image:Wikipedia cat.jpg|Why the rest of the internet is full of shit.
Image:Wikiwar.jpg|Mychael Styne will boom us all.
Image:Anon loves wikipedia.png|[[Anonymous]] loves Wikipedia.
Image:Waisted.jpg|Anonymous is also a wasted idiot.
Image:Wikibonk.jpg|Finally, Anonymous bonk.
File:Bouncywikilogo.gif
</gallery>}}

==Videos==
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|Wikipedia|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>eaADQTeZRCY</youtube>
;Meet the Professor
|<youtube>_RTirBSmg0I</youtube>
;Some nerd listening to the longest personal name evar
|<youtube>20PlHx_JjEo</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>7dGJDJoeAok</youtube>
;Jewish Internet Defense Force and how to edit Wikipedia}}
|}}
}}
 
'''DONATION TIME!'''

<center><gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|2015
Image:Wikipedia 2017 donation.png|2016
</gallery></center>

==See also==
[[File:Wikipedia demoralization.png|right|thumb|280px|The TL;DR version of this article]]
[[Wikimania]]
*[[Arbitration Committee]]
*[[SuperMemo|Brain (How to funnel all of Wikipedia into your -)]]
*[[CHILDPROTECT]]

*[[ED vs TOW]]
*[[Edit war]]
*[[Hack|Justification (Irrelevance of)]]
*[[Metapedia]]
*[[Poop.mov]]
*[[Racism]]
*[[Psycho|Rulesfag]]
*[[Shit]]
*[[Corruption|System (Global)]]
*[[Wikiwarfare|Warfare (Inter-wiki)]]
*'''Wikis (Other)'''
**[[Conservapedia]]
**[[Illogicopedia]]
**[[Metapedia]]
**[[Uncyclopedia]]
**[[Wikifur]]
*'''Wikipedia'''
**[[Vandal#How_to_Become_a_Wikipedia_Vandal|How to properly vandalize -]]
**[[List of deceased Wikipedians|Users (Deceased)]]
**[[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|Administrators (Gallery of)]]
**[[List of heterosexual Wikipedia admins|Admins (Heterosexual)]]
**[[Wikipedia/Jokes|Humor (Delusion)]]
**[[WP:You have no rights|Your rights (Users)]]

===Villains===
*'''[[Breitbart]] - officially [[No shit|an unreliable source,]] as of [[Last Thursday|October 2018]]
*'''[[The Daily Mail|Daily Mail, the]] - due to Jewbo spooning ''[[The Guardian]]''
**'''For a full rundown see: [[WP:DAILYMAIL]]
*'''[[MONGO]]'''
*'''[[Scientology]]

===Supreme Assholes===
*'''[[Science Apologist]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Davkal]]. Occasionally masturbates to [[science|physics textbooks]].
*'''[[Davkal]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Science Apologist]]. Believes aliens and ghosts control the [[Government]].

==External links==
* [http://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Punjab_(Pakistan)&action=history On Wiki-PEDO-ia it's ok to rape and marry little girls, especially Christian girls, especially in Punjab, Pakistan!!!]
* [https://www.theregister.com/2008/03/03/jimbo_wales_rachel_marsden/ Jewbo rapes Rachel Marsden hard core style, than he dumps her live on wiki-pedo-ia, then in return she sells his shit he left at her place on shitty ebay!!!]
*[https://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Clyde_Bruckman&diff=prev&oldid=9581421 Wikipedoians surely love to talk to themsleves 24/7.... especially psycho stalker felon antandrus (david, homeless bum from santa monica area, CA) and his retarded bastard son XXBlackburnXx]
*[https://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224 The CIA is among Wikipedia's most prolific editors] (Archived: {{archive|56bdL|1}} {{wayback|http://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Facebook|The Faces of Wikipedia users}}''' (98 percent men, 2 percent squirrels) (Archived: {{archive|7awXF|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Facebook|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents|TOW Admin Noticeboard}}''': Your front-row seat at the freak show
**'''{{wikilink|Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|How the Jew Wikipedia describes its own CP scandal}}''' (Archived: {{archive|ydvBE|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|title=2}})
*[https://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html ALL Universities, colleges, schools must ban wikipedia] (Archived: {{archive|8VojN|1}} {{wayback|http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*[http://www.wikipediareview.com/ The Wikipedia Review] - Anti-Wikipedia message board, nearly died in 2012
*[https://wikipediocracy.com/ Wikipediocracy] – The primary Wikipedia criticism website at present. Like it or suck it.
*'''{{archive|GHgD9|Wikipedia: A Techno-Cult of Ignorance}}'''
*[https://www.theregister.com/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem?page=2 Another “flattering” review] for Wikipedia (Archived: {{archive|ZWQKf|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem/page1.html|title=2}})
*[https://www.theonion.com/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-independence-1819568571 "Wikipedia Celebrates 750 Years Of American Independence"] (Archived: {{archive|OPcRp|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theonion.com/articles/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-indepen,2007/|title=2}})
*[http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html Stranger than Fiction: A Wikipedia Conspiracy] (the true story of [[SlimVirgin]]) (Archived: {{archive|6l25|1}} {{wayback|http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Template:Smile|Send a wiki pedo-smile}}'''
*[https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff One of the many unspeakable things that wikipedos fap to] (Archived: {{archive|JApyK|1}} {{wayback|https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff|title=2}})
*[https://www.independent.co.uk/tech/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47-000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9 Meet the 'pedo who has made 47,000 minor corrections of the same grammatical error.] - He insists he has 'a life' (Archived: {{archive|v4kF|1}} {{wayback|http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9|title=2}})
*{{archive|http://www.wikipedia-watch.org/*|Wikipedia Watch}} - Daniel Brandt's true criticisms!!!
*[https://www.avclub.com/the-scandal-of-olivia-newton-john-12-surprisingly-cont-1798214001 "12 surprisingly controversial Wikipedia pages"] - not surprising, if you know how Wikipedos think (Archived: {{archive|StgP8|1}} {{wayback|http://www.avclub.com/articles/the-scandal-of-olivia-newtonjohn-12-surprisingly-c,2201/|title=2}})
*'''A Criticism of the Wikipedia''' - a critical examination of Wikipedia by a [[B&|former]] [[Pervert|user]] Lir (Archives only: {{archive|DDjKo|1}} {{wayback|http://www.kapitalism.net/thoughts/wikipedia.htm|title=2}})
*<s>[http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia Len Osanic vs. Wikipedia]</s> (dead) a case study of the edit wars surrounding [[John F. Kennedy|JFK]] assassination [[Truth|conspiracy]] [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|figure]] L. Fletcher Prouty (Archived: {{archive|iSSWY|1}} {{wayback|http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia|20200111065117|title=2}})
{{Takedown}}
{{mmoseries}}
{{cults}}
{{wikis}}
{{WP}}
{{timeline|Featured article September 22 & 23, [[2012]]|[[Bill O'Reilly]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Adventure Time]]}}
{{timeline|Article of the Now June 13, 14 & 15, [[2022]]|[[Keegan Salisbury]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome]]}}

[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Faggotry]]
[[Category:Sites]]
[[Category:Wikis Suck]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

[[Category:Circumphiles]]
[[Category:Circumcision promoters]]

File:Wikipedia nigger page views disabled.png

2026-01-19T07:01:46Z

Yooco: Sources: * https://web.archive.org/web/20220611011743/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info * https://web.archive.org/web/20240324134715/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info

Winrar

2026-01-19T06:24:29Z

Yooco: WinRAR door

[[Image:Winrar is you.png|thumb]]
[[File:WinRAR Nag Message.png|thumb|275px|The message that tells you to buy the software after the trial period.]]
'''Winrar''' or '''WinRAR''' is an out of date file browser used to view [[encryption|zipped]] or .rar files that would otherwise be unavailable when using the default shitty [[Windows]] explorer. WinRAR was designed by a [[Russian]] named [[powerword|'''Alexander Roshal''']] who apparently [[retard|doesn't know what the phrase "trial period" actually means]]. The "trial" (evaluation copy) of the program never runs out; after 40 days of use, the program prompts you to buy a license for the software every time you open it. Aside from the annoying message popping up every time, there are '''no differences or restrictions''' in the functionality of the program.

If you want the full version of the software, you can waste $29.00 on it, or you can go to [[Winrar/rarreg.key]] and copy these text and get the full version for free, without having to pay a cent! The latter option is the most commonly used, considering that nobody wants to give $29.00 in [[Jew Gold]] to some Russian retard who can't even code restrictions into a software application.

==How to Crack==
[[File:WinRAR door.jpg|thumb|Effectiveness of WinRAR's licensing.]]
{{quote|Please note that [[lie|WinRAR is not free]] software. After a 40 day trial period, you must either [[scam|buy a license]] or [[DO IT FAGGOT|remove it from your computer]].|The WinRAR nag message that nobody gives a fuck about.}}
Rather waste $29.00 on this shit? I'm not stopping you, but if you want to [[lazy|make your life easier]] and save [[money]] then you are in the [[wrong|right]] place.

*Go to [[Winrar/rarreg.key]] and copy these text.
*Create a file called rarreg.key
*Paste into rarreg.key
*Locate '''C:\Program Files\WinRAR''' or '''C:\Program Files (x86)\WinRAR''' or '''C:\Users\<Username>\AppData\Roaming\WinRAR''' or whatever and copy and paste the rarreg.key file into the directory.
*[[????]]
*[[PROFIT]]

Considering that it can be cracked so easily, you'd have to be a total fucking retard to pay a cent for it.

'''ALTERNATIVE METHOD:'''

Just x out the trial message or Pay for the [[business]]

==Gallery==
<center><gallery perrow="5">
Image:You.rar.gif|[[A winner is you|A Winrar is you]]
Image:Winrar irl.png|Winrar [[IRL]]
Image:winrawr.jpg|[[touhou|Patchouli]] for WINRAWR! (More like, a Winrar IN you, [[amirite]]??)
File:WINRAR TROPHY.jpg
File:93mb-2.jpg
File:Win rar butt.gif
File:Winrar.JPG
</gallery></center>

==See Also==
*[[List of ways to win at the internet]]
*[[Fail to Win]]
*[[Epic Win]]
*[[A winner is you]]
*[[You Win the Prize]]
*[[Software Crack]]
*[[Serious Business]]

==External Links==
*[https://www.win-rar.com/predownload.html Get it Here] - Don't forget to crack.
*[https://www.win-rar.com/predownload.html?&Version=32bit Alternatively, you can get inferior 32-bit version Here]
{{softwarez}}
{{money}}
{{Serious}}

Wikipedia

2026-01-19T06:18:11Z

Yooco: Wikipedia disabled view counts for "Nigger"! This is the first known article to ever have disabled view counts. This must have been done by a back end developer. Normal administrators can not do this.

{{achtung|1=The view count for Wikipedia's "Nigger" article was disabled! [https://archive.today/2025.09.08-135146/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Nigger&action=info See for yourself!]}}
<center><div>[[Image:wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|1100px]]</div>
<div>{{morphquote|ahfuckicantbelieveyouneedauniquecsselement|background-color:#FFF;|font-weight:bold;
|They even have this policy, it's WP colon DICK, it's called '''don't be a dick''' and it's fucking hilarious because '''they're all fucking dicks'''|[[hipcrime]]
|Dear Wikipedia readers: We are the small non-profit that runs the #5 website in the world. We have only 150 staff but serve 500 million users, and have costs like any other top site: servers, power, programs, and staff. Wikipedia is something special. It is like a library or a public park. It is like a temple for the mind, a place we can all go to think and learn. To protect our independence, we'll never run ads. We take no government funds. We survive on donations averaging about $30. Now is the time we ask. If everyone reading this gave $3, our fundraiser would be done within an hour. If Wikipedia is useful to you, take one minute to keep it online and ad-free another year. Please help us forget fundraising and get back to Wikipedia. Thank you.|TOW begging [[Jews]] for their [[Jew golds]].
|And you will never find a more wretched hive of pseudoskeptical, atheistic scum and villainy. We must be cautious.|With apologies to Sir Alec Guinness
|Great idea, wrong species|E.O. Wilson (on communism, but he meant Wikipedia)
|Verifiability, not truth|Wikipedo's content policy. It's okay to cite a supermarket tabloid as proof, provided you do cite it.
| [W]ithout the content[,] Wikipedia is just Facebook for ugly people[.] |Iridescent, Wikipedia administrator, 2015-07-31<ref>[http://web.archive.org/web/20231216202028/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia_talk:Requests_for_adminship/Liz&diff=next&oldid=673901499 Wikipedia talk:Requests for adminship/Liz: Difference between revisions, 2015-07-31]</ref>
}}</div></center>
[[Image:720px-Illustration of anal bead use svg.png|thumb|right|Vectored TOW porn. That means they spend time tracing over the lines.]]
[[Image:Wiki-fisting.png|thumb|The kind of [[shit]] you find on TOW. {{wikilink|Fisting|Added at Jimbo's /r/}}]]
[[File:Wikipedia wobble.gif|thumb|BULLSHITTING INTENSIFIES]]
[[File:Multiple orgasms using foreskin.mp4|thumb|right|The penises of many Wikipedia administrators are unable to do this, so they [[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|use Wikipedia to promote cutting it off]] so they can feel less inferior. ]]
[[File:Stephen Pruitt - 5 million Wikipedia edits, 0 sex.jpg|thumb|Meet the Wiki-pedo-ian with the most edits. 6 million Wikipedia edits, 0 girlfriends followed by koafv aka JUSTINE ANTHONY KNAPP/KRAPP!!! ]]

'''World of Wikipedoia''', also known as '''''that other wiki''''' (''T.O W.''), '''the Internet's sacred cow of knowledge''', '''holy orb of knowledge''', '''[[#Circumphilia_-_promotion_of_circumcision|the circumphiles' paradise]]''', '''Mr. "I am always right"''', '''the Internet's self-appointed gatekeepers of information'''<ref name=wikipee />, '''Wikipee'''<ref name=wikipee>[https://www.michaelzwilliamson.com/cms/index.php/18-general/556-502 The Massive Failure That Is Wikipee - Michael Z. Williamson (21 July 2019)] - </q>The deletion of the page ended my writing career, destroyed my awards, drained my bank account... Oh, wait, no, it did nothing whatsoever. Utterly fucking irrelevant. Which pretty much sums up the failures who've appointed themselves gatekeepers of what is "credible" or "notable." Easy enough: go to google. There are 69,800 google hits for my name. If only it was 70,000, they might care...<q></ref>, '''Ministry of Truth'''<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Dig Deeper]</ref>, or '''Wikipedia''', is a radical left wing propoganda website disguised as a blog and is justified by other radical left news pages from [[mainstream media|corrupt media]], which they refer to as "reliable sources".<ref>[https://digdeeper.club:443/articles/wikipedia.xhtml#sources Wikipedia is the Ministry of Truth - Reliable sources - DigDeeper]</ref> It is considered an "encyclopedia" and the best of [[humanity]], proof for to how the absolute [[mental retardation]] has contaminated the entire [[world]] population. Editiors plagiarize other people's work, they twist the words around and they boast how they are smart with new article creation or article "improvement."
Let it also be known that the first article on Wikipedia was for Afghanistan, reinforcing the idea that Wiki-pedo-ia is popular among the sandnigger pedophile community, another reason why ''not'' to use '''TOW'''.

Wikipedia also is a [[MMORPG|massive multiplayer online role-playing game]] in which some [[geek]] braggarts compete to paraphrase [[TL;DR]] information into a shorter, reader-friendlier format. However, unlike any other MMORPG, the major rewards and upgrades are to players' perceived expertise on their own edits, which players can trade in for sparse IRL recognition or can add to their [[no life|sparse lists of personal accomplishments]].

During gameplay, Wikipedia players can gain more authority as they progress, with "Administrator" and "Double-O Licensed" rankings granting them access to GOD MODE. While the rules for winning the game are a tightly-kept secret, it is believed that the winner is treated to a night of accolades and praise from Wikipedia overlord [[Jimbo Wales]].

Had Wikipedia not been infiltrated by propagandists and circumphiles long ago, it would at least be an attractive target for them.

(There's also pieces of an "encyclopedia" buried in there, among the articles about [[anime]] fanboy crap and [[football]].)
__TOC__
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==What is a Wiki? An Example of Supreme Idiocy==
[[Image:Wiki-dictatorship.png|center|800px]]
 
[[File:USS liberty - the final solution.png|thumb|"Verifiability above truth, and Israeli propaganda before either"]]
[[Image:Semfaceani.gif|thumb|Not-so-subtle [[racism]] on the '''{{wikilink|Facial_(sex_act)|facial page}}'''.]]
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Requests_for_arbitration/Charles_Darwin-Lincoln_dispute|Edit war dispute}}'''. A full out tribunal complete with e-court and e-arbitration and extra special e-punishment. The users are serving their e-sentences with 3-year bans and Wikipedia-style "house arrests" in which they cannot edit certain articles and must behave in a certain way. The entire argument stems from the fact that Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln share a birthday. This resulted in huge [[lulz]] for everyone else but none for them, while Wikipedophiles got all [[emo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident|Talk page about USS Liberty}}''' in which [[Jayjg]] attempts to argue with the vice president of the USS Liberty Veterans Association about the Liberty incident. Yes, '''{{wikilink|Talk:USS_Liberty_incident/Archive_2#Hopefully_something_to_be_quickly_resolved_...|an Israeli agent involved in the cover-up}}''' is allowed to always have the last word on the article, not someone who was actually there and involved in the events in question.
*People who think that Wikipedia can love them back are always easy to troll. Case in point: '''{{wptl|Vanboto}}''', who discovered that a few people guarded the article on the song "Rock Lobster" with a passion, reverting all edits which tried to insert the fact that it was once played on ''[[Family Guy]]''. His response: a brave and bold display of insanity, petty reverts, harassment, personal attacks, irrelevant responses, and trolling. In short, clearly admin material if not for the fact that he was obviously there to have fun and not contribute in any meaningful way, as evidenced by his constant references to ''[[Fresh_Prince|The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air]]'', ''[[Dungeons & Dragons]]'', and ''[[Pokemon]]''. End result: a permaban and much drama. That'll do, [[troll]], that'll do... on the other hand, trolling wikipedos who think they're the "keymaster and gatekeeper" of articles is most necessary.
*The courageous protectors of Katie Couric have decided that citing [[South Park]] makes their [[butthurt]] and so it's OK to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/w/index.php?title=User_talk:87.69.176.81&diff=287041938&oldid=287022906 call people useless dicks and tell them to go fuck themselves]. To those who suffer from amnesia, [https://southpark.cc.com/video-clips/1cgdy1/south-park-crap-verification here is the clip] that angered these [[faggot]]s and made them call the [[Waaaambulance]].
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Hot_dog|The discussion page for the article on Hot dogs}}'''. It's about <s>10</s> '''38''' pages long and filled with drama. About HOT DOGS.
*[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?search=wikipedia+vandalism&title=Special%3ASearch&profile=advanced&fulltext=1&ns0=1 Certain searches] mysteriously "failing"
*'''{{wikilink|William_Shatner's_musical_career|William Shatner's musical career}}'''
*[[John Seigenthaler Sr.]] - Exposing the Kennedy assassin.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Feces/archive1|Their pants-wetting terror of poop}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Semen|A bitchfest about an image of semen}}'''.
*'''{{wikilink|Talk:Child_pornography|Talk page about Child pornography}}''', their favorite subject. [[Wikipedos]] argue that the [[CP]] article needs moar CP plox. For further lulz, check out the archives.
*Wikipedia is somehow controlled by both the far right and the far left wing political parties at the same time, creating a paradox, without any lulz.
*A place to '''{{wikilink|Talk:Mudkip/Archive02#Anti-mudkip_bias|argue about discrimination against Mudkips}}''', while providing images showing how one can keep [[Mudkip]]'s fin erect.
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:LAME|WP:LAME}}''' contains a full list of Wikipedia's dumbest content disputes - including full-out edit wars over everything from the height and weight of [[Street Fighter]] characters, whether the title of [[Avril Lavigne]]'s hit single "I'm with You" should have a capitalized "W", the cup size of a female ''[[Final Fantasy]]'' character, to whether or not Daffy Duck fathered any children, and more - yes these were all real edit wars, [[srsly]].
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Songs_about_Wikipedia|A collection of fan-written songs about Wikipedia}}''', most of which are stolen from well known popular songs (ex. "Doncha' wish your Pedia was Free like Me?" - ripped off from a Pussycat Dolls single).
*What could possibly be more useful than '''{{wikilink|Category:Living_people|a nine-trillion page category comprising an alphabetical list of all Wikipedia biographies with subjects who are currently still alive?}}''' Because obviously you can't trust the individual articles themselves and so this list is bound to be more up-to-date and reliable, not to mention convenient.

==History==
[[Image:No to Wikipedia.png|thumb|right|170px|Say NO to '''Wik ipedia'''. Do not be tempted into the "encyclopedia" for the [[Poverty|poor]].]]The Wikipedia game originally began as a plot to streamline the [[plagiarism]] of college essays.

Said plot was evil, so naturally, a [[Jew]] was involved. Once the Jew realized that tricking narcissists into self-indentured servitude was an easy way to profit, he immediately began a campaign to turn all Google users into "contributors" to the full-blown cut and paste orgy of his design.

The encyclopedic aspect of Wikipedia began as a butthurt reaction to its more popular predecessor, Encyclopedia Dramatica. Over time, Wikipedia began to feature more and more interesting topics like the lives of 17th century rabbis, characteristics of the 57th termite chromosome, and Hollywood films including one or more of the ''Sesame Street'' Muppets - in other words, content with no real relevance to internet culture. It now also functions as a limited medical journal (which is useless to its contributor base) and criminal resource for retards.

TOW players, however, got a bit headstrong about the actual value of their contributions, and even the Jew conjurer himself began to think of it as the 21st Century's Library of Alexandria. Indeed, this sustains the standard ''modus operandi'' of Wikipedoes, Jews, Liberals and all who believe that re-writing pre-written facts garners respect from people who can't tell the difference and don't give a damn.
{{clear}}

==Progression through [[the Game]]==

{{morphquote|morphquote|background-color: white; margin: auto;|font-weight: bold;
|Pseudo-scholarship (from pseudo- + scholarship) is a work (e.g., publication, lecture) or body of work '''that is presented as, but is not, the product of rigorous and objective study or research;''' the act of producing such work; or the pretended learning upon which it is based|'''{{wikilink|Pseudo-scholarship|Do go on...}}'''
|Pseudohistory is akin to pseudoscience in that '''both forms of falsification are achieved using the methodology that purports to, but does not, adhere to the established standards of research for the given field of intellectual enquiry to which the pseudoscience claims to be a part, and which offers little or no supporting evidence for its plausibility.'''|'''{{wikilink|Pseudohistory|Tell me more...}}'''
|'''You do!''' Yes, anyone can be bold and edit an existing article or create a new one, and '''volunteers do not need to have any formal training.'''|'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Who_writes_Wikipedia%3F|"Who writes Wikipedia?"}}'''
|Wikipedia is written largely by amateurs. '''Those with expert credentials are given no additional weight.'''|*cough* [[Essjay]] *cough* '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:About#Strengths.2C_weaknesses.2C_and_article_quality_in_Wikipedia|"Strengths and Weaknesses of Wikipedia"}}''' (it doesn't say whether this is a strength or a weakness)
|In Wikipedia, verifiability means that anyone using the encyclopedia can check that the information comes from a reliable source.|So why do you pretend to be an encyclopedia, when you've admitted that you're just a link-farm?
}}

===How the Game Typically Progresses===
#You make edits to articles
#Your edits get reverted by [[aspie]] [[fucktard]]s
#You revert them back and they in turn revert again
#You bicker on the talk page of the article
#You whine about the aspies on the administrator noticeboards accusing them of being uncivil, they in turn accuse you of assuming bad faith
#You open a Request for Comment on their behavior
#You take them to arbitration
#Someone gets banned forever, normally the most sane person
#[[Jimbo]] profits

===Grinding===
You grind by writing articles in a concise, yet obtuse way. This is achieved by ignoring copyediting rules and flavor your material with unwarranted sesquipedalianism (If you did not have to look up this word [[you]] are probably... See! The insulting remark appeared in your head! No one even had to spell it out for you!) It was rumored that by 2020 Wikipedia:s user base will be replaced with Google Paraphrase, a software in development.

===Leveling up===
Each time someone complains to you on your user page, you have gained a level. This is easily achieved, since everything you do will yield complaint: both constructive work and vandalism.

===Player versus player===
How to go player versus player in Wikipedia.
#Remove a raw addition to an article which you easily could have fixed or replaced yourself, and which really does not do any harm. In the very least, it could be used as a pedagogical example for newcomers how an article ''not'' should be written.
#Write an essay on the talk page explaining why the addition was removed citing a lot of so called policies, guidelines and essays. Ignoring the fact that said rules, guidelines and essays was not created to stop newcomers, but to help them understand how Wikipedia works, and also was created to stop dickheads like yourself.
#Get your reversion contested.
#Initiate a voting game for how the issue should be handed.
#An administrator who is the [[judge]] in the voting games, rules in your favour despite the outcome, because he will never thwart the effort of a fellow avocation aficionado bureaucrat, despite how stupid [[you]] are.
#Run amok removing things over the whole site, citing said voting game as if Wikipedia was a court room.
#PROFIT!

===Gaining Experience Points===
*1 vandal reversion = 1 exp (a ''vandal'' is defined as an editor with a different point of view than yours)
*1 legitimate edit to a page = 2 exp
*1 article created (assuming it stays) = 20 exp
*1 Good Article = 100 exp
*1 Featured Article = 200 exp
*1 report to AIV or UAA = 5 exp
*1 page deleted via AfD = 20 exp
*1 page deleted via PROD or CSD = 10 exp
*1 support for an [[Rfa]] = 20 exp
*1 article with POV or misinformation inserted into = 100 exp
*1 user blocked as a result of drama created = 50 exp
*1 instance of getting a page blocked = Over 9000 exp

===TOW Ranks===
*Rollback > 10,000 exp
*Pending changes reviewer > 15,000 exp
*Template editor > 20,000 exp
*Administrator > 100,000 exp
*Bureaucrat > 500,000 exp
*Checkuser or Oversight > 500,000 exp

==Why it's Generally a Huge Bucket of [[Pelican Shit]]==
[[File:Wiki lolrus.jpg|thumb|Yu hav no buket becos it is not in the nuspapers!]]
[[Image:AEdunk.jpg|thumb|Encyclopædia Dramatica once again breaking its balls to 1up Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Allthegoodnames.JPG|thumb|135px|All the good names are taken...]]
[[Image:Wikipedia article Lucas 2.5.png|right|thumb|Articles about [[memes]] aren't allowed, but things like this are???]]
{{quote|If I told you [[I Has a Bucket|I had a bucket]] and showed you the bucket, would you ask for a newspaper article to prove I had a bucket?|[[bucket Seal|210.9.136.63]] (talk) 12:53, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}{{quote|Yes. Yes, we would. That's the way it works on Wikipedia.|Jew (talk · contribs) 12:57, 23 May 2008 (UTC)}}
Currently Wikipedia contains [[over 9000|4.8 million]] [[English]] articles, 4.8 million of which are [[Plagiarism|plagiarized]] from [[ED]], [[Britain|Encyclopedia Britannica]], or [[Futa]] sites. After edits from various [[moderator|admins, editors,]] [[trolls]] and [[vandals]], only 343 articles remain at least 50% factually accurate. This leaves Wikipedia on an academic par with "[[Star Wars]]: Incredible Cross-Sections: The Ultimate Guide to Star Wars Vehicles and Spacecraft" and "My First Book of Animals from A to Z". All reputable universities and high schools have permabanned the use of Wikipedia in academic citations.

Wikipedia has a policy that all articles in it needs a [[NPOV|neutral point of view]], but in reality it is a doublespeak that basically means "Write in a pro-[[communist]], pro-[[Israel]], pro-[[Liberalism]] view", which is the exact reverse of neutrality. No wonder all the [[SJW]]s, Jewish Activists and [[Narcissist]] power maniacs are attracted to it.

Wikipedia has a concept called WikiLove and has a policy of "[[Ass|ass-u-me]] good faith" amongst its contributors. This is a vital policy because there is no good faith among any of [[Wikipedos]], so it is necessary to at least pretend that the other guy isn't out there to be an asshole.

Wikipedia's new March 2007 rules demand that an administrator proves he has a higher (PhD) degree if he [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/03/12/technology/12wiki.html claims] he has one. So far that [[bullshit]] [[lie]] to the public has not been enforced.

Wikipedia has very weak armor and only a level 3 shield. Thus, they are open to a flanking attack from pretty much anybody. And since they have about eighty updates per second, it's easy for a small but fatally incorrect change to slip through unnoticed. Also, Wikipedia is quite prone to [[hivemind]], since everybody wants to be an [[admin]], and disagreeing with Wikipedia admins is an easy way to not become one.

The [[administrators]] of Wikipedia are generally open-source advocates and therefore tend to have no knowledge of how to run a successful website. They are constantly arguing with each other over how often the [[GNAA]] Wikipedia article should be nominated for [[VFD|Articles for Deletion]] section, disregarding the [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines]] which prevent multiple attempts. They delete the important sites, but keep the [[bullshit]]. Like: '''{{wikilink|Fart_lighting|Fart lighting}}'''.

Actually, the only thing in which Wikipedia [[fap|beats]] [[ED]] in is a higher percentage of [[vandal]] users. For a prime example, see: [[Sceptre]].

Contributors to Wikipedia are not valued. Bimbo Wales has said that editing is a privilege, so you are not really donating your time by editing articles. Most contributions (images, text, etc.) are actually [[deleted]], and the users with the most power ([[Administrators]], Bureaucrats, etc.) contribute the least content to the site. The site is so [[shitty]] that it is pointless to try to improve it. The best way to fix it would be to just delete it and start over.

{{squote|Wikipedia is a stalking mill designed to stroke the egos of social reprobates and other fringe groups who don't belong in [[normal]] society. The people who are there long term and essentially live there for the most part fit the profiles of true sociopaths.

[[Jimbo Wales|Wales]] developed a great gaming system on Wikipedia which he uses to attract the dregs of society -- people who don't have lives are who aspire to be "famous and great" are [h]is marks and he's come up with a rat maze to lure in the stupid, lonely, and ignorant.

I've been famous and in the public eye for what now -- 15 years? I have to say, power, fame, and attribution are overrated. There's a simple wisdom is simply accepting who you are and being happy about it. None of the psychos on Wikipedia seem happy, it's a perpetual [[war]] zone and highly competitive. But what eludes all of them is the [[cheese]] at the end of the maze -- there is none -- just the smell of cheese.

Wales and his cronies just [[whore]] all of these idiots through their "Wikigame" (The site is an online gaming system essentially -- see who can get to the end as an "[[Admin]]" or "Arbitor"). Wikimedia then cashes in on everyone's hard work.

When was the last time Wales took one of his admins to get a massage in a russian house of ill repute on Wikimedia's dime? But HE DOES.

Bottom line, its a bunch of morons being used to run his business for free, while his cronies back at the Wikimedia offices cash in on everyones hard work and pay themselves 300K+ salaries per year,{{citation needed | date= July 2013}} divert and misappropriate the funds and live the good life by living in fancy hotels and eating fancy meals while the rest of the stupid schmucks live in their mom's basement or their trailer parks in New Jersey and Alabama while Wales and his cronies cash in on YOUR HARD WORK.

It's got to be the second biggest scam after [[Linux]] development. Linus Torvalds has a similar model. Let people "contribute" so they feel good about themselves, while the project and site owners rake in the [[$]][[$]][[$]].|{{archive|Vk4A4|Jeff Merkey}}'''}}
===The Never-Ending Story===
A common misconception is that "Wikipedia is never finished." Remember, each Wikipedia article you come across was forged from the blood of thousands of angsty [[teenager]]s [[edit war|edit warring]] over really important facts about the world.

The real problem with Wikipedia is the Wikipedians. From players to sysops, every member of its community is the scum of the internets - worse than spammers, worse than [[script kiddies]] and [[Nigeria|Nigerian scammers]], and worse than [[IRC]]ers. The average Wikipedia user has the '''{{wptl|122.148.180.50/Archive|intelligence of a seal}}''', and '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Smegma_Penis02.mirrored.jpg|bathes or showers once a month}}'''.

Wikipedia is full of people with no desire to improve what it is intended for, information. Instead, they want to grow their [[e-penis]] and one day become a [[mod]].

The only way to save the Wikipedia [[MMORPG]] is to delete all usernames and only allow two players to be its administrators: [[Grawp]] and [[Willy on Wheels]]. All other accounts will be reduced to powerless IP addresses. Its' users will then continuing their bitching and pedantic arguing. [[Tosh.0|Tosh]] had the right idea: get over there and post some fucked up shit.
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===Reliability===
{{main|Mechanophilia#Legality|Mechanophilia}}
[[Image:Wikipedia-oxymoron-example.png|thumb|right|220px|Example of self-perceived reliability at Wikipedia.]]
[[Image:Wikipedia atomic bomb bias.jpg|thumb|right|200px|The good people of wikipedia handle history's most complicated issues with an opened mind and detached objectivism.]]
 
<center>{{frame|<youtube>kFBDn5PiL00</youtube>
<center>'''Michael Scott On Wikipedia'''}}</center>
 
In 2007, a variety of scandals began to surface from within Wikipedia. Mainstream news organizations began to openly discuss the common public perception that Wikipedia is "unreliable." In a sophisticated experiment, it was demonstrated googling "Wikipedia" and "unreliable" generated more than 502,000 "hits". In contrast, a similar search using "Encyclopedia Dramatica" and "unreliable" generated barely more than 300 "hits", with most of these being self-deprecating jokes of humility from Encyclopedia Dramatica editors. Thus, it was scientifically proven that Wikipedia is much, much more unreliable (see graphic). Anyone in the world can edit Wikipedia, which means you know you are getting information from the best source possible.
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====Acceptable Sources====
Wikipedia has very strict standards regarding the sources you can use when editing. The following is a list of some of the most common ones.
*[[The Guardian]]
*[[Daily Kos]]
*Huffington Post
*Junge Welt
*KCNA
*PinkPaper UK
*[[Michael Moore]] documentaries
*Countdown, with [[Keith Olbermann]]
*Anything by [[Noam Chomsky]]
*Some stupid [[nigger]]'s asshole
*Anything licked or stolen by [[Jews]]
Additionally, many editors simply cite obscure books that no one owns. That way, no one will ever be able to prove they're totally bullshitting.
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====Pornography====
[[Image:jwales.jpg|right|175px]]
So great is the amount of porn on Wikipedia it (almost) rivals [[ED]] - a [[fact]] made all the more pathetic by the fact ED is made by and for [[basement-dwellers]] and those with a disgusting sense of humour whereas Wikipedia is genuinely trying to educate people.[citation needed] Here is a list of the very full articles dedicating to proving that sad fact:
*<big>[[Wikipedia Porn]]</big>
*<big>[[Wikipedia's Greatest Hits Sex]]</big>
*<big>[[Virgin Killer]]</big> For all you Loli-lovers.
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===WP:Admins control universal truth===
{{main|The Wikipedia Jews}}
Wikipedia mods come trolling the world from the heyday of the page between retards <s>and the search results of [[Google]]</s>. Mankind has been trolled in its entirety by no more than a bunch of anal-[[rape]]d Aspies, who just log in for World Domination. Unsurprisingly, among those interested in world domination are psychological warfare experts from [[Mossad]] and the [[JIDF|JIDF,]] who relentlessly insert [[Israel|Israeli]] propaganda into every article that they can find, and ruthlessly suppress anything critical of ZOG's schemes. The magic of the Electronic Dictatorial Totalitarian Democracy, all in the name of volunteering for the [[NOT|best idea of the world for an encyclopedia]]. Long Live Wikipedia!.
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=== What is "wiki lawyering"? ===
When an administrator or an editor liked by the administrators cites policy, it's considered valid. When an unwanted user cites policy, it's "Wikilawyering" or "bludgeoning", regardless of the validity of the arguments, so it can be dismissed and tossed down the moat.

=== Inconsistently applied policy ===
Wikipedia deletion policy states subjects have no say on the deletions of their own articles.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Criteria_for_speedy_deletion#Non-criteria Wikipedia:Criteria for speedy deletion § Non-criteria] (as of December 18, 2023)</ref> As so often on Wikipedia, policy is not applied consistently, making it pointless.

In this example, [[satanism|satanist]] [[Michael Aquino]] was able to request the deletion of the article about himself. [[Guy Chapman]], then an administrator, considered it a valid reason.<ref>[http://archive.today/2016.11.30-051001/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Michael_Aquino&oldid=232504731 Wikipedia:Articles for deletion / Michael Aquino (archive 2016-11-30)]</ref>

<gallery>
File:Exemptions from Wikipedia policy - Michael Aquino deletion.png ‎ | (Click to expand)
</gallery>

===Hivemind===
{{main|Wikipedia Admin Gallery}}
[[Image:Wikipedia1984.gif|thumb|right|220px|A satirical GIF that [https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?title=Special%3ALog&page=File%3AWhambo_in_%2784.gif was censored by Commons' kindness brigade]. "Porn = Good. Satire = Bad."]]
[[Image:Wikimania stallman keynote2.jpg|220px|thumb|right|[[RMS]] loves Wikipedia. No other commentary is needed.]]

[[Wikipedophile]]s, especially [[sysops]] and recent patrollers, share a hivemind. They all think alike, act alike, and no matter how abusive a member of the hivemind is, they always support it. Those of the hivemind look like they are [[sock puppet]]s, but they actually communicate telepathically.

In 2005, like a colony of bees, the hivemind recognized that those outside the collective had their own individuality. Now they are a complete collective consciousness like the Borg and no longer believe identity exists outside the collective. To them, everyone is fake, an illusion; an actor who has no thoughts, emotions, viewpoints, etc. and must be eliminated/assimilated and until then they do it is viewed as [[trolling]]. Any expression of individuality is [[banned]] as trolling or, to use a common wikipodadminism, "disruption." See: [[Don't feed the trolls]] and '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Don't_Feed_the_Divas#How_to_deal_with_a_Wikipedia_Diva|Don't Feed the Divas}}''', especially the last sentence, which crushes what little self-esteem you may have:

<center>''"In some cases, the diva will stay retired, '''but the loss will be quickly filled by other editors who are not so high maintenance; editors for whom the goal is not self promotion and validation, but rather improvement of the project."'''''</center>

The hivemind extends outside Wikipedia as well, on those rare occasions that an admin strays onto another forum. A good way to start a [[flamewar]] with them is to hint, suggest, joke, outright state or otherwise insinuate that Wikipedia is anything less than the greatest academic achievement since the library of Alexandria.

Thus, because of the Hivemind, Wikipedia has immunized itself against any criticism. Of course, the corollary to this immunity, according to themselves, is because so many people are part of it, it can't be controlled. Due to the amount of participants, real criticism will come from inside. Yeah, that'll happen. Criticize the Hivemind at your own peril, because the Hivemind controls the power to delete your edits, to ban you, and to railroad you from social advancement (as [[SlimVirgin]] did to Gracenotes).

*When ED criticized Wikipedia, ED was site-banned in their '''{{wikilink|MediaWiki:Spam-blacklist|"spam" blacklist}}'''.
*When Wikipedia Review criticized Wikipedia, the Monkey-Fucker Cabal removed all links under some kind of definition of "no personal attacks".
*Wikipediocracy published [https://wikipediocracy.com/2013/02/26/russavia-is-scott-bibby-is-russiansafetycards/ a blog entry] about how [https://www.roger-pearse.com/weblog/2013/03/12/dishonesty-at-wikipedia-they-dont-like-it-up-em-sir/ fucked-up] Wikipedia is, and was [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MediaWiki%3ASpam-blacklist&diff=543691461&oldid=542603600 stuck on the "spam blacklist"].
*"Real newspapers" like ''The Register'' criticize them, and the chant goes out "[https://lists.wikimedia.org/pipermail/wikien-l/2007-July/077064.html Ban them, ban them, ban them...]"
*Watch out ''New York Times'', [https://www.nytimes.com/2007/07/01/magazine/01WIKIPEDIA-t.html you're next].
{{clear}}
====Recent Changes Patrolling (RC Patrolling)====
{{main|Recent changes patrol}}
[[Image:Paranoid.jpg|thumb|200px|The average recent change patroller is infected by the [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|USI]]-virus.]]
Why the fuck would anyone want to patrol for recent changes? The articles are usually dull. Patrolling edits on Wikipedia is [[boring]] as hell. The only reason is to [[troll]]. Cuckolded administrators delete everything believing they are cyber judges (though [[IRL]] judges at least pretend to follow a set of rules) after their wives have refused to touch their cocks. (Just kidding, 80% of the fat little bastards aren't married and never will be. Lol.) If you actually attempt to post facts on Wikipedia and an RC patroller doesn't like it, they will use any sort of retarded excuses to revert or just call it vandalism. Failing this, they will attempt to make your argument invalid through the power of [[some argue]].

RC Patrollers usually use scripts to search for specific things. They're actually very bad at catching vandalism in articles ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=MONGO&diff=prev&oldid=67472921 this one] went unnoticed for 17 days and '''{{archive|h6Bfu|this}}''' went unnoticed for ''two'' years!), but very effective at finding anyone criticizing admins in talk pages where such criticism is reverted and the person banned forever. Real vandalism lingers and festers until years later, that account pisses an admin off - and it is only through [[wikistalking]] that [[Pedobear|Wikipedophiles]] are able to find [[vandalism]] at all.

Some RC Patrollers are also huge [[hypocrite]]s because they are also vandals. These [[fake editors]] include Konstable and [[Blu Aardvark]].
{{clear}}
====The Asperger Cancer====
{{main|Asperger's Syndrome}}
[[Image:Anders-behring-breivik_bawwww2.jpg|thumb|[[Anders Breivik]] has an edit reverted. ([https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/norway/9209392/Anders-Behring-Breivik-my-tears-were-for-Norway.html 2012])]]
Any observant new user to Wikipedia will soon ask themselves "What's with all the running 'lists' of inane bullshit? I don't need to see a list of Russian deep fat fryer models built in 1963. Why are the administrators social misfits with little sense of wisdom or good judgement? Does Jimbo know of this [[faggotry]]?" The answer to both questions is that Wikipedia attracts [[Asperger]] zombies like flies to [[shit]].

These basement dwelling [[virgins]] have alienated millions of [[normal]] people from Wikipedia. They take out their [[asperger]] [[rage]] for their hundreds of school yard beatdowns and permanent sexual isolation on the rest of us. It is believed that many of these [[faggot]]s ''cannot even talk'' in real life. Jimbo can't stand these robots, but their problems are harnessed by Wikipedia as unpaid labor, which makes the [[profit]] for his [[hookers and blow]].

[[Asperger]] [[zombies]] are relatively easy to spot. They will be:
*[[White]], and male.
*Have their photo on their user page. Asptards have little sense of what is socially appropriate, and don't realize how '''{{wpul|H2g2bob|they come across}}'''. They mainly have '''{{wpul|J.delanoy|blank, asperger stares. This perma-virgin actually has a picture of himself with Jimbo}}'''.
*Their user page will be covered in checklists, "to do" tables, programming code, personal details, and generally look like a spreadsheet. Look at [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:MBisanz&oldid=338235254 this] fucknut's older page version, before he knew ED was looking and had found the ''"I fuck on the first date kid"'' all grown up (scroll down).
*Sometimes, those on the asperger/autism spectrum will openly declare their problem. '''{{wpul|Rainbowofpeace|"Rainbowofpeace"}}''', who obsessively edits articles about discrimination, helpfully tells us how he is an autistic gay Jew with ADHD. That's a high score on the ''[[Tumblr|Oppression olympics]]''!
*Favorite subjects include [[men's rights]], which were fought over constantly on TOW from its early days, and [[GamerGate]]. Because real human females won't talk to Cheeto-gobbling pimply 300-pound fans of Tolkien and [[My Little Pony]].

{{userbox
| border-c = #00000f
| id = HIV
| id-c = #000000
| id-fc = #ffffff
| id-s = 13
| info = '''This user has [[Asperger syndrome|Asperger syndrome]].
| info-c = #808080
}}
{{clear}}
====Notable Wikipedos====
{{main|Bureaucratic Fucks}}
*[[Ironholds]], former WP:IRC rockstar, now desysopped for [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Human_penis_size&diff=prev&oldid=46470687 vandalism] and for bringing the project into disrepute with such quotes as:
{{quote|[19:58] <Ironholds> You should however have instead taken your pen, punched a hole in her windpipe and looked on as her attempts to wave for help got increasingly feeble.}}
*[[ArbCom|GorillaWarfare]], one of his galpals
*[[Fluffernutter]], famous for her sexchats with Ironholds:
{{quote|<nowiki>19:59:11 < Fluff|laptop> you'd think he'd have figured hiow to slap asses by now, but nooo</nowiki> 
19:59:51 < tyw7> why is he slapping your ass? 
20:00:00 < Ironholds> tyw7: we're fucking 
<nowiki>20:00:02 < Fluff|laptop> why not? we DID say we're bored</nowiki>}}
*[[Tyciol]]
*[[AmericanDad86]], known for fighting everyone and being [[Gay|flamboyant]].
{{clear}}

=== Circumphilia - promotion of circumcision ===
[[File:Wikipedia guessing game.png|thumb|Can you guess which of these three paragraphs appeared on Wikipedia in 2022?<ref name=doesNotAffect>{{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision#Sexual_effects|20221030002924|title=Circumcision § Sexual effects - Wikipedia (October 30, 2022)}}</ref> ]]
[[file:wikipedia-benevolent-2040.png|thumb|In 2040, they will want you to forget all about it.]]

People hate what they can't have.

A significant portion of [[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|the people who get to decide who is allowed to edit]] had [[circumrape|the foremost part of their sexual organs cut off]] early in life, and secretly wish they had been allowed to keep it. However, they know that the day they will wake up as whole men with foreskins will never come. Therefore, all that is left to them to cope with their lack of foreskins is to deny the importance of the part they are missing, so they can feel like they don't miss out on much and inflate their confidence.

One of the most egregious [[:category:circumphiles|circumphiles]], the [[virgin|sexless]] [[basement dweller]] [[Jayjg]], was promoted into the [[Arbitration Committee|wiki kangaroo court]] in 2005 by no one less than the founder. Why would the founder do the dirty work with his hands if basement-dwelling low lives are willing to do it for free?

As one would expect, Wikipedia transformed into a circumphile spam machine over the following years. It would not take long until other circumphiles were promoted into positions of authority: Avraham to administrator in 2006 and bureaucrat in 2009, [[James Heilman]] to administrator in 2010, and Zad68 to administrator in 2013.

Whereas Wikipedia used to mention that foreskin is "a highly sensitive part of the penis" in 2004,<ref>{{wayback|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Circumcision|20040605200550|title=Circumcision - Wikipedia (June 5, 2004)}}</ref> anything negative about circumcision was quietly purged over the years. Wikipedia even went even as far in 2022 as to claim that circumcision does not affect sensitivity at all.<ref name=doesNotAffect />

[[File:Wikipedia circumcision 2004 2022.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Because this embarrassed Wikipedia, they had to switch coping strategies in 2023 to complicated mental gymnastics: ''"Circumcision doesn't actually affect sensitivity, it's just the attitude that affects the sensitivity[[oneoneone|!!1!!1!]]"''

[[File:Mental gymnastics to justify circumcision.png|thumb|center|640px]]

Looks like they can't make up their minds.

The administrators who are not circumphiles quietly tolerate the circumphilia.

Besides, what kind of person would have a positive attitude towards having had a part of their body cut off without their approval, especially as a defenseless infant?

[[File:Age of consent for circumcision - 0.png|thumb|center|Age of consent for circumcision: Zero.]]

=== Deletion count contests ===
Some administrators compete for the highest deletion count so they can proudly show it off to their peers on their user page. To inflate their deletion count, they seek any excuse they can find to delete pages. For example:

<gallery>
File:The proudest achievement in the miserable life of W-admin Liz.png|An administrator vengefully deletes over a hundred valid geographical articles because their author was blocked three years earlier over a minor incident.
File:Liz deletion count as of October 11th, 2023.png|Proudly presented on her user page.
</gallery>

Funnily enough, the deletion policy that would later be named ''WP:G5'', deletion of creations by an author disliked by the administrators, was a spontaneous and undiscussed invention in July 2003 by an early Wikipedia administrator, Martin Harper, who also happens to be a circumphile. This means ''WP:G5'' is a circumphile invention.<ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 Martin Harper invents what would later become WP:G5] ([http://archive.today/2021.05.28-134850/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Deletion_policy&diff=prev&oldid=1674653 archive])</ref><ref>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 The early edit history of the "Circumcision" article] ([http://archive.today/2022.08.13-161256/https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Circumcision&action=history&dir=prev&limit=1000 archive]) shows the circumphilia of Martin Harper.</ref>

==TOW & ED==
{{main|ED vs TOW}}
''See also: [[Wikipedia_Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Wikipedia:Articles for deletion/Encyclopedia Dramatica]], [[ED vs TOW]], and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica:ED vs. Wikipedia]]''

[[Image:ED vs Wikipedia.jpg|thumb|left|ED [[OhInternet|had]] [[Tits or GTFO|tits]], therefore [[TOW]]-[[fanboy|fans]] are [[homosexual]]. You'll notice that ED is wearing a hat with a hammer and sickle, the symbol of the glorious Soviet Union.]]
[[Image:Slanderous_WHORES.JPG|thumb|Wikipedia, not biased about ED at all.]]
[[Image:ED on TOW.jpg|thumb|We're back!]]
[[Image:44407e8f.jpg|thumb|Even as a source, they still hate us.]]

It all started one day when [[Jameth]], typing with only his [[cock|penis]], attempted to enter the [[mediacrat]] drama as a Wikipedia entry. It was '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Mediacrat|discussed and denied}}'''. This act alone sparked the creation of the wiki [[you]] are reading right now. Far as you know, you chronic masturbator.

Every year, Wikipedians pretend that they are going to delete the [[Recovered|Encyclopedia Dramatica article]]. '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Occasionally}}''' they do for brief intervals, mostly on the grounds of hosting the previously-deleted [[Mediacrat]] entry, but usually they [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Encyclopedia_Dramatica&action=history wuss] '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica|out}}''' of it. The fucks tried it '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Articles_for_deletion/Encyclopedia_Dramatica_(6th_nomination)|six times}}''' that are still visible; there were others, vanished by that pathetic anime dork Avery "Ashibaka" Morrow. He hates ED. (And it's extra-lulzy because he was also a major protector of the 4chan article, which was also subjected to endless editwars. But then he was a moderator on 4chan for a long time.....)

Have a look at the '''{{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica/Archive_1|first archive of the ED article talkpage}}'''. There were earlier ones bu the Wiki-faggots deleted them. Yes kids, Ashibaka, Sceptre and Mbisanz are whining little pussies hells yeah.

Wikipedia's steadfast refusal to host an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] article has been the source of a great deal of hilarious [[drama]] on the site. Yet [[TOW]] continues to cover up any controversy associated with the topic and deny the creation of the article, even one that is unoffensive, informative, and well written. Wikipedia has articles on [[Bukkake]], [[Goatse]], [[2 Girls 1 Cup]], an extensive disambiguation page on [[dong]]s (including a page on a male [[porn]] star named '''{{wikilink|Long_Dong_Silver|"Long Dong Silver"}}'''), and [[God]] knows what else. However, they have refused to allow a page on [[ED]] simply out of spite.

Update: Last closing argument (aside from [[Sceptre]]'s faggotry):
{{squote|Encyclopedia Dramatica – Reclosing this for the second time. We have a consensus - i.e we want to see an extremely well written draft with impeccable sources before we touch this again.|Spartaz Humbug! 19:54, 3 May 2008 (UTC)}}

<center>
<big>'''[[HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS|DISREGARD THIS SECTION]], [[TOW]] [[Fellatio|SUCKS]] [[COCKS]]'''</big>

'''An''' {{wikilink|Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Encyclopedia Dramatica article}} '''has been up on Wikipedia, in all its lulztastic, properly sourced and cited glory since''' {{wikilink|Talk:Encyclopedia_Dramatica|at least May 2010}}.
</center>

As expected, it took only a few hours for many [[Wikipedo]]s to go into childlike tantrums, thus forcing yet another deletion review, deletion review number 57 to be exact. The topic of this deletion review is to determine the validity of sources. When the article was created, the source list was actually larger than the article itself, but this has since been trimmed down for a number of arbitrary reasons, the most prevalent being that TOW's editors are unable to live up to their own retarded rules. However, the overall consensus is that the article should stay and that anyone who says otherwise is a [[hypocrite]] who is simply [[butthurt]] over ED's treatment of [[TOW]] and its editors and fails to realize that this immature behavior will only further the problem.
{{clear}}
====Wikipedia's Content Vs. Encyclopedia Dramatica's Content====
*Wikipedia relies on verifiability, not truth. ED relies on the lulz, and baseless jokes don't make good satire.
*Wikipedia does not rely on primary sources, and hates academic sources. ED would post a photo from your high school yearbook if it's lulzy enough.
*Activists use Wikipedia to skew articles to try to get [[NORP]] sympathy. ED shits on everyone for the sake of cheap jokes.
*Wikipedos will argue by throwing around abbreviations. EDiots will laugh at you and mock your argument.
*Wikipedia lets shitposters like [[Ryulong]] run rampant. ED has no problem telling its own [[Girlvinyl|founder]] to fuck off.
*Wikipedia is almost always online. ED goes down every other day or some shit.
This section needs no witty dick jokes. Wikipedia is a giant punchline.
{{clear}}
===Tips On Vandalizing Wikpedia===
{{Main|Vandal/How-to}}
*Subtly insert false info, such as changing a person's birth date from 1970 to 1990, or insert info that is not obviously false, like: "x was a distant cousin of Bill Gates."
*Make a new account every time you vandalize, so that even if you are caught, the admin can't revert all your past vandalisms.
*Vandalize articles that are not actively watched by a lot of editors, such as biography of obscure living persons.
*Always create an informative edit summary for your edits. For extra points, make up a spiffy character set with nonbreaking spaces...
:*Examples: ▲ ʙ ɮ Ⅽ Ⅾ ∈ Ⅎ Ғ Ɠ ╠╣ℍ █ ▄█ K █▄ █▀█▀█ █▀█ ●  ℙ ☭ Ⓡℙℝ ▄█▀ ▀█▀ █▄█ ▀▄▀ █▄█▄█ ✖ 匕 ▀█▄ ● ❛❜ This will help your edits look super respectable!
{{clear}}
===[[Power Word|Power Words]]===
Employ the following words to increase your wiki [[bullshit|credibility]]:
*'''{{wikilink|Camel_notation|CamelCase}}''' - Sticking two words together to form the silhouette of a [[vagoo]].
*'''{{wikilink|Antisemitic_canard|Canard}}''' - some sort of Jew bird that eats fetuses and desecrates churches.
*Good faith - A codeword for the [[13 year old boy]]s for which wikipedians are on the prowl.
*[[Portmanteau]] - A sexual device used by wikipedians to have buttsecks regardless of gender or disability.
*Schism - A euphemism for a [[catfight]].
*Shoa - a mythical tale of an effeminate mustachioed hero who defeats a horde of greedy beasts.
*Admonish - To tie up and make gay manlove with the one that doesn't have complete faith in the Church of Jimbo.
*Redact - To run circles around a pole until exhaustion
*Coatrack - A maniacal stick use by wikipedians to hang their coats on.
*Disambiguation - A process whereby someone who is unsure about their sexuality undergoes painful gender reassignment surgery.
{{clear}}
===<nowiki>{{</nowiki>{{wikilink|Template:Unblock|Unblock}}<nowiki>}}</nowiki>??===
[[Image:Howtobanappeal.png|thumb|{{Unblock}<nowiki>}</nowiki> hard at work.]]
This is template you use to ask to be unblocked. After you've been blocked for no reason, you swallow your pride and ask that someone undo it. You then wait for an hour until some 15-year-old denies your request without even looking at it. Sometimes, if you insist arguing, they will block you as well from editing your user talk page, without banning you, for their own private [[wikipedo]] "[[lulz]]". At that point you can only appeal the block by email (which they will probably ignore as the jerks full of themselves they are) which can/will eventually be blocked as well.

If you get banned by an admin don't even bother using this because no matter how well-reasoned the <nowiki>{{unblock}}</nowiki> request, it always gets declined. Like <s>[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User_talk:81.153.223.189&oldid=142952978 this one]</s> (dead): ''"HOW DARE YOU CALL ME A TROLL M0RESCHI YOU STUPID BASTARD! AFTER WHAT YOU FUCKING DID YOU DESERVE TO BE SHOT!"'' Clearly the person has proven their point, but the [[bureaucratic fuck|bureaucratic fucks]] are immune to reason or logic. If your request is declined, you may get a lame reason.

Whenever you edit on Tor and the node is blocked, always put an unblock message on that IP claiming it's no longer Tor. Sometimes they even get fooled. Admin said, "First time I've seen such a request where the user was telling the [[truth]]."
====Zaiger's <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> Request====
For absolutely no good reason, ED's own [[User:Zaiger|Zaiger]] was given [[ban|life with no parole in Ban L&]] by the ban-happy cockz at Wikipedia.
{{quote|You have been blocked indefinitely from editing for abuse of editing privileges|Lies}}
In one last fighting breath, Zaiger submitted an appeal using the <nowiki>{{Unblock}}</nowiki> template to try and parole out, but to no avail.
{{quote|What I see here is you trying to blame someone else for your own problems.
...that doesn't mean that you are automatically pardoned for your own bad behavior.|Wikidouches}}
Thankfully, no one cares about Zaiger.
{{clear}}
===Easy [[eBay]] Profits: Admin Farms===
{{main|eBay}}
[[Image:Damn furries wikipedia.jpg|thumb|410px|right|A [[wikipedophile]] put this up on Jimbo Wales's talk page to complain about [[admin abuse]] by [[furries]] in kangaroo suits (look nearly real, don't they?). Jimbo avoided the discussion with a [[banhammer|banning]].]]

While shouting "op me" is an easy way to become an op on IRC, in Wikipedia it takes a little more work (but only a little more). The purpose of becoming an admin is to sell your account on eBay. ([http://wikipediareview.com/lofiversion/index.php/t204.html 2006])
#Make a new account using dial-up or AOL, not proxies. These are the easiest ways to sock puppet and still use your other accounts for things like removing inaccuracies from Wikipedia.
#Create a user page so you look legit. The easy way is to fill it with [[userboxes]] until it looks like ribbons on a third-world military dictator. If you just copy somebody else's userpage, you will get caught. Then write up a fake bio that says, "Hi I'm only 12 and want to be an admin some day." Most admins on Wikipedia are too young to grow pubes, so you have to be in their age group. They never vote for anyone old enough to date.
#Don't question anything. Behave like a robot. Get one of those anti-vandal scripts and have it auto-revert while you sleep. Always revert: (1) Someone who reverts an admin—if you're lucky you'll occasionally beat somebody else to this (2) IP address users—because these are all vandals and sockpuppets (3) New contributors—because they don't understand Wikipedia (4) Anyone who has ever been banned before, even for an hour, because they're permanently shitlisted. Now don't worry about wrongly reverting any of these people, it happens all the time. Just say it was a mistake. No one in charge likes these people anyway. Learn the abbreviations for policy pages like WP:NPOV and WP:NOT and use them in your edit summaries. Nobody will care whether your usage makes sense. On talk pages, if someone asks a question, tell them that their statement is original research, speculation, and that Wikipedia is not a forum. Act like it is serious business.
#After a few hundred fake edits, go to the [[VFD|articles for deletion]] every day.
#Next, go to votes for adminship; always vote to support, so those people will vote to support you. This should be obvious. Admins like people who support admins and hate those who are critical of admins.
#When you reach 4,000 edits, go to ''requests for adminship'' and nominate yourself: Poof! you're an admin!!!
#Then go to eBay and auction it. Make sure the reserve price is over $1,000 so you don't sell it cheap.
#Until the auction ends, don't just do nothing or they'll know it's an eBay sale. Use the account for things like POV-pushing, banning any of the four shitlisted types you used to only revert (by any, I mean every user you can find). But if you're too busy, just find someone complaining about admins and ban them forever and lock their talk page; actually you have to do this at least once every day, or else somebody will think the admin account was hacked.

'''If you want to keep your account and not sell it:'''
#Get a life.
#If that fails, do the most respected admin activity, encourage vandalism. Vandalism is the only way you can justify your job. If there weren't so many vandals, there would be 4 admins. So get your script out and just ban randomly. Be sure to lock the user's talk page. If you see the user come back on, hide what they write and explain that they are a "sockpuppeting troll", ban them forever, and lock their talk page.
#Don't bother fighting vandals now. You've got the equivalent of a government job: you can't get fired, only transferred. Become a copycat of Willy on Wheels and you'll only get a new account.

'''Fun activities to do as admin:'''
#Mess with the '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:MediaWiki_namespace|MediaWiki namespace}}'''.
#Ban other admins for [[lulz]].
#Replace Wikipedia articles with ED ones. It improves accuracy.
#Unban all the [[Willy on Wheels]] accounts. Or just clear the entire ban list.
#[[Goatse]] the Main Page.

===Heroes===
[[Image:Yourmission.jpg|frame|When dealing with [[Willy on Wheels]], it is [[Wikipedia Policies and Guidelines|Wikipedia policy]] to take it seriously.]]

All over [[teh internets]], people complain about the bad things of Wikipedia; that they're all child molesters, Homeland Security agents, Zionist propagandists, furries, Jimbo Wales' alter ego is [[GreenRaeper]] (founder of [[WikiFur]]), how official policy permits admin abuse "[[is not a bug, it's a feature]]", and that there are news articles constantly on how they make [[snuff]] films with young boys. But nobody notices the heroes of the site:
*[[The Colbert Report|Stephen Colbert]].
*[[Don Murphy]]
*[[Willy on Wheels]]
*Señor Pelican Shit - /b/rave soldier who researched and documented [[Pelican Shit]] to a new level, a serious concern still affecting Wikipedia.
*Autofellatio Professor - Helped many people '''{{wikilink|Commons:File:Autofellatio_2.jpg|Autofellatio_2.jpg}}'''.
*[[Publicgirluk]] uploaded some pictures of herself to illustrate relevant articles and got called a troll by the master [[wikipedo]] wealthy pornographer for her trouble.
*THE MOTHERFUCKING JUGGERNAUT BITCH!! reputed for massive AOL autoblocks.
*[[Blu Aardvark|Jew Aardvark]] Wikipedia Jews masturbate to his photos.
*Squidward, the fastest vandal west of the Mississippi, known for harvesting more open [[proxies]], creatin more sockpuppets than Bomis has porn. He is king gypsy who lives in [[Chicago]] by the lake. He hates Antandrus, Avraham & others <s>[http://antandrus.tripod.com/ as proved by his crappy website</s> (lol down)]. The Wikipedia Jews are always on the lookout to raep him. Slap that foreskin, homes.
*'''{{wpul|Hephaestos|Mike Garcia}}''' - high class of vandalism since 2003 (get a life!) <blockquote>''"He is currently one of Wikipedia's most promising vandals. He appears to be persistent, creative, and knows to vandalize pages that will be seen by many people. One day, he may even be considered in a class along with the great Willy on Wheels, but he will need to "diversify" his vandalism before this can happen. Almost all of his vandalism has been to the English Wikipedia; a good piece of advice to him would be to start attacking admins' user pages on some of the foreign language Wikis. His recent vandalism of the [[Wookieepedia]] shows that he has begun this diversification process already. Mike, you possess a great deal of talent; the sky's the limit for you!"''</blockquote>
*[[Cplot]]--500 [[sockpuppets]] and counting, clowns!
*[[Professor Tim Pierce]] teaches his students how to make the most of a wiki.
*Wikipedia Is [[Communism]].
*That guy who wrote [[Hyldenism]].
*[[Grawp]]
*Avril Troll
*Anybody who has earned a spot '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:List_of_banned_users|here}}'''. (Note that the top list expose the wrath actions from the King himself, to spread fear among vassals)
*Undercover users from here, allied sites.
*[[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]
*[[Hagger]]
*[[ByAppointmentTo]]
*[[hipcrime]]
*[[Anonymous]] member of [[ArbCom]] who [https://wikipediocracy.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=8&t=2832 whipped Wikipediocracy into a fury] when he ''"tried to hack into the site"'' by means of [http://wikipediocracy.com:2082/ following] a [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/account/cpanel redirect] from his control panel to the site's host where he asked for the domain [https://my.bluehost.com/cgi/forgot password to be reset]. They were thinking about calling the FBI!

==Wikipedia IRC==
{{main|Freenode}}
The Wikipedia [[IRC]] chat is a fun place to watch [[Wikipedophile]]s discuss criticism of the project while banning the critics, although a more likely discussion will involve eating Christian babies, banning other users to get their rocks off. A fun way to troll Wikipedia IRC channels is to announce that you are logging the channel. For some reason, Wikimediots raise strong objections to the [[GNAA|publication of chat logs]], so be sure to do it often. Just like [[Daniel Brandt]].

And whatever you do, DO NOT LAUGH AT ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA.

===Lulzy IRC===
====One:====
<Slowking_Man> DCC SEND exploit = kline
<-- Slowking_Man has quit (Killed by Rez (This connection has violated network policy.))
<-- WikiTeke has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CXI has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- CakeProphet has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))
<-- Poore5 has quit (Read error: 104 (Connection reset by peer))

====The only thing remotely funny ever from #wikipedia====
<pre><VegaDark> what's that one disorder called when a person looks like a kid all their life
<mavhk> VegaDark: infant death
</pre>

==Summation==
Generally speaking, Wikipedia is the compendium of all human knowledge, both true and false. Except of course where groups (i.e. [[Furluminati]], [[The Wikipedia Jews]]) go around turning arrays of articles into propaganda and bullshit.

Contrast:
*"Welcome to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia that anyone can edit." - Wikipedia front page.
*"[Wikipedia] is not a place where people have the inherent right to edit" - Jimbo Wales, October 29, 2007. ([https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents/My_desysop_of_Zscout370&oldid=168329048#Public_apology Source])

==Gallery==
{{cg|Wikipedia|wikigallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikipediababy.jpg|Some people never learn.
File:Highesthonor.jpg|The highest medal of honor a TOW editor can hope to achieve after years of "hard work".
File:Wikiwank - terraforming venus.png|Edited by lonely spergs, you say?
File:That_time_Wikipedia_considered_memory-holing_c._m._killings.png|100 million people died from communist mass killings? Nah, who cares?
File:Never forget what they wanted us to believe - Wikipedia 2022.png|Never forget what they wanted us to believe.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Barack obama ns.jpg|Wikipedia is [[racist]]!
Image:George bush bdi.jpg|If wikipedia says so...
Image:Brokenwikipedia.JPG|breaking the format is always fun.
Image:Wikipedia Spanking.jpeg|Typical Wikipedia Articles
Image:SillyWikipedo.jpg|Sometimes it doesn't need to be vandalized.
Image:Typicalwikipedia.jpg|Another classic of pedantic [[Metzizah b’peh|pedophilic]] Jew-oriented gobbledygook
Image:Trolledwiki.PNG|An example of Wikipedia being trolled
Image:WWII_cite_source.png|Citation or it didn't happen.
Image:Whatusuallywikipedialookslike.jpg|What Wikipedia usually looks like.
Image:wikiblock.jpeg|Many ED users are familiar with this page.
Image:Wikifail.PNG|An example of Wikipedia's [[bullshit|superior intelligence]].
Image:wikipediacontent.jpg|Breakdown of Wikipedia content
Image:BNB rules.jpg|Standard Wikipedia policy
Image:Historian.png|Typical Wikipedia user. Note the [[unix beard]]
Image:Angelislulz.JPG|What happens when the Wiki main page isnt protected.....again.
Image:wikipediaattack.jpg|Proof that Wikipedia is full of [[Jews]] and [[Pedophiles]].
Image:Wikipe-tan sockpuppet show.png|[[Wikipe-tan]] is sooooooooo [[kawaii]] [[desu]]! [[^_^|^O^]]
Image:MarkOfAWitch.jpg|unfunny vandalism is not reverted
Image:Lulz_Wikipedia_Donation.JPG|[[Anonymous]] Japanese hit back at racist Wikipedia.
Image:TOW racism1.PNG|[[TOW]] demonstrating their strict gb2nigger policy.
Image:Wikipedia Return to The Kitchen.jpg
Image:Jimbo and Wikipe-tan.jpg| [[Jimbo Wales|Jimbo]] loves [[loli]].
Image:Iluvdrawing.jpg|Wikipedia [[retard|love the mentally challenged]].
Image:Wikipediavirusgames.jpg|[[Cat girl]] [[wikipedos]] invade [[World of Warcraft|MMOs]]! next they e-[[rape]] kidz!
Image:Ned Scott Wikipedia professionalism.png|A genuine beacon of [[e-penis|professionalism]]. Unless you're a [[fucktard|holier-than-thou pretentious asshole]], i.e. 99.9994% of all Wikipedian regulars.
Image:Stfuned.jpg|Professionalism thrown back.
File:911 Wiki Vandal.png
Image:TOW_Motivational_Poster.jpg|'''TOW's''' Mission Statement.
Image:Wikijudaism.png|Revered the world over as an accurate, objective source of knowledge.
Image:Wikipedia_admin.jpg|Good for a [[banhammer|perma-ban]] anytime!
Image:YouHaveTwoCowsWikipediaStyle.jpg|Proof that [[Wikipedos]] are drawhores.
Image:Egg.jpg|This is your brain on Wikipedia
Image:Blocked per Linda Mack.JPG|Say the magic words and it's banhammer time!
Image:DocWPNOR.jpg|You're not in Kansas anymore, Toto.
File:Wikipedialiberals.jpg|Wikipedia has a leftist bias.
Image:Wikipron.jpg|The hottest pron on Wikipedia!
Image:Comparison.jpg|Reliability comparison.
Image:Blackpeopleshouldntbeallowedtovote.png
Image:Hodgemanssf.jpg|The book version of TOW, in addition to being the best thing ever.
Image:Chucknorrisgg1.jpg|Epic Edit!
Image:wikitalklulz.JPG|Editing often leads to sensible discussion on TOW.
Image:Evenwikisays.jpg|Pool's Closed, it are a fact. I read it on Wiki.
Image:Mudkipswiki.JPG|
Image:Wikirule.gif|Masters of their domain.
Image:Barnstarwikip.jpg|Some wikipedia users will do anything for a barnstar.
Image:TOW_originality.JPG|TOW [[divide by zero|implodes on its intellectual property]]
Image:4chanwiki.jpg|Acknowledged by the WikiJews
File:Suckmycock.jpg|Wikipedia sucks cocks
Image:Poundcake.jpg|Wikipedia style guide for esoteric topics
Image:Wiki-Pedos.PNG|Proof that Wikipedia is ran by Paedophiles
Image:Username removed.gif|[[Grawp]], whose username is removed, and then the "username removed" label is struck out for extra effectiveness.
Image:Wikilulz.png|Wikipedia at its best.
Image:Just like wikipedia.jpg|Just like Wikipedia, only 2 out of every 40 "women" are actually female.
Image:EditBragg.jpg|Now [[you]] can make shit up about Pulitzer Prize winning writers - who also make shit up!
Image:BarrackGoebells.JPG|The new president is a black nazi!!!
Image:Cumshotbush.JPG|YES, THATS A CUMSHOT!
Image:Putin.jpg|The russian President
Image:Wikipedia donate amount.jpg|Any penny donation is appreciated
Image:Wikidonationplea.jpg|Nothing is obvious for Wikipedians
Image:Racistgoogle.png
Image:Wikitroll.jpg
Image:Wikihentai.jpg| A 'Quality Image' according to Wikipedia
Image:Wikipedia_Recent_Changes_Spam_Spamming.png | lrn2/wiki newfags
Image:Wikipedia_-_The_Wikipediatrician.jpg|The Wikipediatrician
Image:Wikipedia_-_Your_One_Stop_Research_Stop.jpg
Image:Wiki-deathstar.png
Image:WIKIPEDIA DONATION BANNER SCREENSHOT IRONIC.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA WIKIPE-TAN.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA STEAMER PIX REQUEST.jpg
Image:WIKIPEDIA KANGAROO USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST.jpg
File:Wikipediaredirectjews.PNG
File:Wikipedialulz.jpg
File:WikipediaNeutralPOV.jpg
File:Wikiwrong.jpg
File:Juno2.png|Wikipedia is about imparting information about important topics!
File:Wikipedia article glenn campbell time i get to phoenix math.png|Cool story, bro
File:Wikipedia feminist propaganda campaign.png|Now imagine how many propaganda teams '''don't''' advertise
File:Wikipedia edit-a-thon hispanic heritage month 2017.jpg|And another!
Image:Gwash.png|Classic. Wikipedia controls Google.
Image:Jackson is dead.jpg|[[Michael Jackson|MJ]] is dead even on Wikipedia.
Image:Wikipedia-lolcat.jpg|[[Redundant|Why Wikipedia is full of shit.]]
Image:Wikipedia cat.jpg|Why the rest of the internet is full of shit.
Image:Wikiwar.jpg|Mychael Styne will boom us all.
Image:Anon loves wikipedia.png|[[Anonymous]] loves Wikipedia.
Image:Waisted.jpg|Anonymous is also a wasted idiot.
Image:Wikibonk.jpg|Finally, Anonymous bonk.
File:Bouncywikilogo.gif
</gallery>}}

==Videos==
 
{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|Wikipedia|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>eaADQTeZRCY</youtube>
;Meet the Professor
|<youtube>_RTirBSmg0I</youtube>
;Some nerd listening to the longest personal name evar
|<youtube>20PlHx_JjEo</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>7dGJDJoeAok</youtube>
;Jewish Internet Defense Force and how to edit Wikipedia}}
|}}
}}
 
'''DONATION TIME!'''

<center><gallery perrow="5">
Image:Wikidonationsfuckyou.PNG|2015
Image:Wikipedia 2017 donation.png|2016
</gallery></center>

==See also==
[[File:Wikipedia demoralization.png|right|thumb|280px|The TL;DR version of this article]]
[[Wikimania]]
*[[Arbitration Committee]]
*[[SuperMemo|Brain (How to funnel all of Wikipedia into your -)]]
*[[CHILDPROTECT]]

*[[ED vs TOW]]
*[[Edit war]]
*[[Hack|Justification (Irrelevance of)]]
*[[Metapedia]]
*[[Poop.mov]]
*[[Racism]]
*[[Psycho|Rulesfag]]
*[[Shit]]
*[[Corruption|System (Global)]]
*[[Wikiwarfare|Warfare (Inter-wiki)]]
*'''Wikis (Other)'''
**[[Conservapedia]]
**[[Illogicopedia]]
**[[Metapedia]]
**[[Uncyclopedia]]
**[[Wikifur]]
*'''Wikipedia'''
**[[Vandal#How_to_Become_a_Wikipedia_Vandal|How to properly vandalize -]]
**[[List of deceased Wikipedians|Users (Deceased)]]
**[[Wikipedia Admin Gallery|Administrators (Gallery of)]]
**[[List of heterosexual Wikipedia admins|Admins (Heterosexual)]]
**[[Wikipedia/Jokes|Humor (Delusion)]]
**[[WP:You have no rights|Your rights (Users)]]

===Villains===
*'''[[Breitbart]] - officially [[No shit|an unreliable source,]] as of [[Last Thursday|October 2018]]
*'''[[The Daily Mail|Daily Mail, the]] - due to Jewbo spooning ''[[The Guardian]]''
**'''For a full rundown see: [[WP:DAILYMAIL]]
*'''[[MONGO]]'''
*'''[[Scientology]]

===Supreme Assholes===
*'''[[Science Apologist]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Davkal]]. Occasionally masturbates to [[science|physics textbooks]].
*'''[[Davkal]]''' - sworn enemy of [[Science Apologist]]. Believes aliens and ghosts control the [[Government]].

==External links==
* [http://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Punjab_(Pakistan)&action=history On Wiki-PEDO-ia it's ok to rape and marry little girls, especially Christian girls, especially in Punjab, Pakistan!!!]
* [https://www.theregister.com/2008/03/03/jimbo_wales_rachel_marsden/ Jewbo rapes Rachel Marsden hard core style, than he dumps her live on wiki-pedo-ia, then in return she sells his shit he left at her place on shitty ebay!!!]
*[https://simple.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Clyde_Bruckman&diff=prev&oldid=9581421 Wikipedoians surely love to talk to themsleves 24/7.... especially psycho stalker felon antandrus (david, homeless bum from santa monica area, CA) and his retarded bastard son XXBlackburnXx]
*[https://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224 The CIA is among Wikipedia's most prolific editors] (Archived: {{archive|56bdL|1}} {{wayback|http://www.abc.net.au/news/2007-08-16/program-shows-cia-behind-wikipedia-entries/642224|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Facebook|The Faces of Wikipedia users}}''' (98 percent men, 2 percent squirrels) (Archived: {{archive|7awXF|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Facebook|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Administrators%27_noticeboard/Incidents|TOW Admin Noticeboard}}''': Your front-row seat at the freak show
**'''{{wikilink|Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|How the Jew Wikipedia describes its own CP scandal}}''' (Archived: {{archive|ydvBE|1}} {{wayback|https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reporting_of_child_pornography_images_on_Wikimedia_Commons|title=2}})
*[https://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html ALL Universities, colleges, schools must ban wikipedia] (Archived: {{archive|8VojN|1}} {{wayback|http://www.nytimes.com/2007/02/21/education/21wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*[http://www.wikipediareview.com/ The Wikipedia Review] - Anti-Wikipedia message board, nearly died in 2012
*[https://wikipediocracy.com/ Wikipediocracy] – The primary Wikipedia criticism website at present. Like it or suck it.
*'''{{archive|GHgD9|Wikipedia: A Techno-Cult of Ignorance}}'''
*[https://www.theregister.com/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem?page=2 Another “flattering” review] for Wikipedia (Archived: {{archive|ZWQKf|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/10/18/wikipedia_quality_problem/page1.html|title=2}})
*[https://www.theonion.com/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-independence-1819568571 "Wikipedia Celebrates 750 Years Of American Independence"] (Archived: {{archive|OPcRp|1}} {{wayback|http://www.theonion.com/articles/wikipedia-celebrates-750-years-of-american-indepen,2007/|title=2}})
*[http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html Stranger than Fiction: A Wikipedia Conspiracy] (the true story of [[SlimVirgin]]) (Archived: {{archive|6l25|1}} {{wayback|http://neilclark66.blogspot.com/2007/12/stranger-than-fiction-wikipedia.html|title=2}})
*'''{{wikilink|Template:Smile|Send a wiki pedo-smile}}'''
*[https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff One of the many unspeakable things that wikipedos fap to] (Archived: {{archive|JApyK|1}} {{wayback|https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Yiff|title=2}})
*[https://www.independent.co.uk/tech/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47-000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9 Meet the 'pedo who has made 47,000 minor corrections of the same grammatical error.] - He insists he has 'a life' (Archived: {{archive|v4kF|1}} {{wayback|http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/gadgets-and-tech/news/wikipedia-editor-has-made-some-47000-corrections-to-online-database-10024355.html?icn=puff-9|title=2}})
*{{archive|http://www.wikipedia-watch.org/*|Wikipedia Watch}} - Daniel Brandt's true criticisms!!!
*[https://www.avclub.com/the-scandal-of-olivia-newton-john-12-surprisingly-cont-1798214001 "12 surprisingly controversial Wikipedia pages"] - not surprising, if you know how Wikipedos think (Archived: {{archive|StgP8|1}} {{wayback|http://www.avclub.com/articles/the-scandal-of-olivia-newtonjohn-12-surprisingly-c,2201/|title=2}})
*'''A Criticism of the Wikipedia''' - a critical examination of Wikipedia by a [[B&|former]] [[Pervert|user]] Lir (Archives only: {{archive|DDjKo|1}} {{wayback|http://www.kapitalism.net/thoughts/wikipedia.htm|title=2}})
*<s>[http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia Len Osanic vs. Wikipedia]</s> (dead) a case study of the edit wars surrounding [[John F. Kennedy|JFK]] assassination [[Truth|conspiracy]] [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|figure]] L. Fletcher Prouty (Archived: {{archive|iSSWY|1}} {{wayback|http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia|20200111065117|title=2}})
{{Takedown}}
{{mmoseries}}
{{cults}}
{{wikis}}
{{WP}}
{{timeline|Featured article September 22 & 23, [[2012]]|[[Bill O'Reilly]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Adventure Time]]}}
{{timeline|Article of the Now June 13, 14 & 15, [[2022]]|[[Keegan Salisbury]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome]]}}

[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Faggotry]]
[[Category:Sites]]
[[Category:Wikis Suck]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

[[Category:Circumphiles]]
[[Category:Circumcision promoters]]

Archive.org

2025-08-12T18:53:08Z

Yooco: /* Deleted from the archives */ BestGore - gory and sorry!

{{Goodnews|The website is officially back!}}
{{morphquote|hackerquote||font-weight; bold
|Have you ever felt like the Internet Archive runs on sticks and is constantly on the verge of suffering a catastrophic security breach? It just happened. See 31 million of you on HIBP!|[[Hacker|Hacker in JavaScript alert]]
|It's dispiriting to see that even after being made aware of the breach 2 weeks ago, IA has still not done the due diligence of rotating many of the API keys that were exposed in their gitlab secrets. As demonstrated by this message, this includes a Zendesk token with perms to access 800K+ support tickets sent to info@archive.org since 2018. Whether you were trying to ask a general question or requesting the removal of your site from the Wayback Machine – your data is now in the hands of some random guy. If not me, it'd be someone else. Here's hoping that they'll get their shit together now.|[[Hacker|Hacker in IA's Zendesk token]]
|}}
[[File:holy greek temple of the Internet.png|thumb|200px|Welcome to the holy greek temple of the Internet! ]]
[[Image:Wayback.png|thumb|An excellent trolling resource.]]

'''Archive.org''' (formal name: '''Internet Archive''') is a [[site]] that tries to save the entire [[Internets]]. It allows people to look at saved versions of websites from years ago and comes greatly in handy when writing [[ED]] articles about sites that no longer exist, or digging up past lulz that is otherwise being removed from the Internets. When it's working, that is. The thing craps out a dozen times a week.

== The Wayback Machine ==

[[Image:Edold.png|thumb|ED main page from [[at least 100]] years ago. Doesn't it look n00bish?]]

When a [[re-re]] decides to delete their [[LiveJournal]] after the [[troll]]s descend and they just can't take it any more, the Wayback Machine allows us to [[Lulz|laugh at their stupidity for all eternity.]] Unfortunately it is possible for websites to request exclusion from the Wayback Machine's archives by putting the file robots.txt in your home directory. This prevents websites from getting robo-stalked (such is the case with [[MySpace]]) which tampers with [[E|Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] writers' trolling arsenals.

Apparently the name of the site is a reference to an episode of ''The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show''. While this reference to a shitty TV show that died before anyone can remember makes the website look like garbage; Do not be fooled, the site is in fact quite useful. Unless you're looking up a [[MySpace]]; In that case, use [[Archive.is]] - for Archive.is doesn't care about robots.txt.

Pages pulled up by Archive.org can be used as blackmail, as demonstrated by professional webcomics [[troll]] Scott Kurtz when he bitched about another web cartoonist re-publishing a [[blog]] post he wrote. Ironically, he has now apparently deleted that post, thus making the circle of [[lulz]] complete.

== Deleted from the archives ==
[[File:Wayback_error_parody.png|thumb|center]]

Unfortunately, Archive.org is not truly dedicated to [[ARCHIVE FUCKING EVERYTHING|archiving the entire web]]. Notably, [[KiwiFarms]] was [https://www.theverge.com/2022/9/7/23341051/kiwi-farms-internet-archive-backup-removal sorried into the ground] (excluded) after causing too much [[lulz]].

=== The Sorry List ===
<div style="column-width:16em;">
* [[LinkTree]]
* [[Quora]]
* [[Soyjak.party]] - more like Sorryak.party!
* [[KiwiFarms]] - more like SorryFarms!
* [[Doxbin]] - obvious candidate; it even rhymes with Sorry! *rapping* Sorry like it's Doxbin! Sorry like it's Doxbin!
* [[Brightkite]]
* [[CyberCiti]] - more like CyberSorry!
* [[TrueCrypt]] - most notable exclusion of 2014.
* [[Fucked Company]] - both fucked and sorried.
* [[Abload]] - probably because some idiots misused it.
* [[theCHIVE]] - looks like the Archive doesn't like imitators!
* [[BestGore]] - gory and sorry!
</div>

== Other services ==

Archive.org also has a huge archive of 1900-1989 [[snuff|B movies]]. When you see them, you'll [[shit bricks]]. Hundreds of [[Mujahideen Video]]s and [[An Hero]] Videos are also submitted every day to the archive, only a handful being deleted. Another reason to go to Archive.org is the massive population of [[shit|experimental musicians]].

== See Also ==

* [[Archive.is]]
* [[4chanarchive]]
* [[Googlecash]]
* [[Ghettoditto]]

== External Links ==

* [http://www.archive.org/index.php The Official Website]
** [http://web.archive.org/web/*/http:/www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Main_Page Archive.org's archive of EncyclopediaDramatica.com's main page from 2007 to 2011]
* [https://www.theregister.co.uk/2018/09/04/wayback_machine_legit/ WBM archived webpages are now court-admissible evidence!] {{archive|0D8kS|U MAD?}}

{{sites}}
{{serious}}
{{SecurityFaggots}}
{{Timeline|Featured article May 22, [[2011]]|[[The Rapture]]|archive.org|[[Jewish Internet Defense Force]]}}
{{Timeline|Featured article October 21 - 23, [[2024]]|[[The Rapture]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Halloween (franchise)]]}}

[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]

File:WinRAR door.jpg

2025-08-11T23:10:19Z

Yooco: source: https://web.archive.org/web/20181125144032/https://www.reddit.com/r/Piracy/comments/a08gab/winrar_my_love/

== Summary ==
source: https://web.archive.org/web/20181125144032/https://www.reddit.com/r/Piracy/comments/a08gab/winrar_my_love/

User:Psychotic Dictatorship/Sandbox

2025-08-11T19:54:48Z

Yooco: Just testing if editing works again.

{{UserSandbox}}

Trust the soyence

2025-08-11T19:52:03Z

Yooco: /* See also */ new

[[File:Trust the science.jpg|thumb|Soyence is the ultimate source of [[truth]]!]]
[[File:Fat_genes_-_STUDIES_SHOW.JPG|thumb|Studies show . . .]]

Whenever a soyentist moves his lips, what comes out must be right. '''Soyence is always right!''' There is no questioning soyence!

== Woy You Should Trust The Soyence ==
=== Soyence [[lie|does not need any money to back it up]] ===
That's right! <s>Soyentific</s> scientific research happns because <s>soyentists</s> scientists do it from the bottom of their hearts! Unlike the rest of us, [[lie|soyentists have no bills to pay]]. [[They do it for free]]!

=== What happens if you don't trust the soyence ===
If you don't trust the science, then our supreme leader fauci will not make any more jewgold. Questioning is literally fascism, and you're literally a nazi for daring to ask a question to our [[bullshit|TOTALLY LEGITIMATE SOYENCE]], who is always right and can never be wrong. Remember trust the soyence or you're promoting misinformation and were going to give you the BANHAMMER.
[[lie|Come on, everyone knows doctors and soyentists can't be paid off/compromised/scripted/lying to your face.]] [[lie|Doctors and scientists could NEVAR lie to you.]] [https://www.mdlinx.com/article/the-dark-side-of-medicine-5-doctors-who-became-serial-killers/lfc-4792 Where would you hear such an unhinged idea like that?]

=== Soyentists have [[lie|always told the truth]] in all of human history. ===
[[Image:Fauci.jpg|thumb|OMG HES SO HONEST!!!]]

Soyentists once preached the non-addictiveness of OxyContin, that smoking does not cause lung cancer, and that partially cutting off the penis does not change sensitivity.<ref>[https://www.history.com/news/cigarette-ads-doctors-smoking-endorsement When Cigarette Companies Used Doctors to Push Smoking - Before studies showed that cigarettes caused cancer, tobacco companies recruited the medical community for their ads.]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_7UmxITxQbs Die böseste Familie aller Zeiten] (The most evil family of all time.) - German documentary on OxyContin and Purdue Pharma.</ref>

[[File:Never forget what they wanted us to believe - Wikipedia 2022.png|thumb|center|600px|'''Wait, what?''' Soyence once said that partially cutting off the penis does not change how the penis feels? Oh, noez! How embarrassing! ]]

=== Soyentists have [[lie|no personal lives and no feelings like the rest of us]]. ===
Soyentists are [[lie|immune to emotions and cognitive biases]]. They are not humans like the rest of us but a superspecies that can always think rationally all of the time!

[[Lie|It's not like soyentists ever sleep and poop and pee and masturbate in their personal time]]. No, they are awake 24/7, busy in their chrome-coloured laboratories.

== Quotes ==
{{quote|There is a tendency to think we somehow magically live in a time that's fundamentally different from other times in history in which it is now a pretty clear and uncontroversial fact that the name of science was abused hard by propaganda, almost everyone easily accepts that historically politically constructed lies were presented as confirmed by science, but somehow people refuse to believe it could be the case nowadays.|[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/soyence.html LRS Wiki: soyence] }}

== References ==
<references />

== See also ==
* [[Reasons to trust the World Health Organization]]

__NOTOC__

{{science}}

Reasons to trust the World Health Organization

2025-08-11T05:37:03Z

Yooco: Created page with "<div style="height:20em;"></div> "

BlogTV

2025-06-10T08:40:20Z

Yooco: /* See Also */ refs

{{lowercase}}
{{cleanup}}
{{potential}}
{{warning|This article has been left rotting in a sea of shit for 2 years, that's how little people care about blogTV anymore.}}
[[Image:BlogTV logo.jpg|right]]
[[File:Keemstar live stream.webm|thumb|The most famous blogTV stream in history, by [[Keemstar]].]]
[[File:BlogTV mylazysundays.mp4|thumb| Naive clueless [[attention whore]] clicks on [[nobrain.dk|MyLazySundays]]. ]]

'''blogTV''' was the place to be with your fucking hands up.<ref name=Keemstar>[[:File:Keemstar live stream.webm|The most famous blogTV stream in history]], by [[Keemstar]].</ref> Later renamed '''[[YouNow]]''' for the sake of unoriginality, it is [[No|THE BEST]] [[camwhore]] site you could go to find high levels of [[unwarranted self-importance]], [[troll]]s or ranting [[trap|trans]] people.

Established in June 2007, "''blogTV''" is a social broadcasting and [[stickam]] ripoff where [[pedobear]]s, [[troll]]s and epic [[phail]]ures go to find [[Jew gold]]. To reiterate "Blog" (as the cool kids call it) is where [[troll]]s go to [[troll]], and freakin' [[party hard]]. "The [[broadcaster]] can broadcast to its audience with a web cam" according to [[TOW]]; and basically no gives a shit because of all the [[advertising]]. The platform also includes a [[teenchat]] system, and crappy [[moderator]]s. The site has a promotional partnership with [[ICQ]] which is an [[IM]] type platform that still exists in 2015 apparently. It is [[notable]] for a high level of [[anti-lulz]], [[fap]]ping, [[emoticon]]-heavy chatting, [http://www.younow.com/2gays2day/channel users of the gay orientation], [[Justin Bieber]] impersonators, and overall [[unfunny]] material.

== blogTV Junior ==
[[Last Thursday]], the admins on blogTV noticed an [[over 9000|abundance]] of [[pedophiles]] hanging out at the broadcasts of little boys and budding camgirls. So they decided to raise the age limit from [[13-year-old boy|13]] to [[16-year-old girl|16]], resulting in lots of [[butthurt|bitching]], but pretty much nothing else since age-lying is still as com-mon as water. During this time, [[over 9000]] petitions were formed, and since there was no organized fight, they all [[fail]]ed miserably. Eventually BlogTV got tired of all the emails from [[13-year-old boy|all of the faggots]] and came up with a [[retarded|TOTALLY AWSUM SOLUTION!!1!11!!!]] And created the jr section for kids aged 13-15. What they didn't realize is the [[pedophile|pedos]] would just make junior accounts and go [[fap]] to the [[13 year old boys|kids anyway.]] So all this did was cost more money for BlogTV to manage and gave another place for the pedos to lurk.

Junior accounts are extremely hard to troll, but this has been proven to be the most effective way.
[[Image:Cockgoeswhere.jpg|thumb|[[Cock goes where]]?!?]]

# Make an account.
# Use [[tinyurl]] to put your video in it.
# Pick a random broadcast, preferably the most popular one.
# Ask if they wanna see your funny new video (a lot of the time some [[no|clever]] little [[retard|viewer]] will say DON'T CLICK @!!11!on! !!!!11 !! just tell them to stfu and it's fine to prove you're not a spambot.)
# Lulz ensue and you get kicked, unless you're fast enough to log out.
# If you get kicked/b&, delete your account.
# Show carries on after lulz fades.
# [[????]]
# [[PROFIT!]]
# Rinse and repeat.

== BlogTV goes Mobile ==
Since BlogTV thought just making an [[ass]] of yourself on a webcam wasn't good enough, they decided "How about we can give our internet whores a chance to blog on the go?", thus making an app to let them stream through their phones and show their daily lives like anyone on Youtube would do. [[Sarcasm|Totally helps when you show off where you live]] among other stupid things. Now you can also become [[an hero]] wherever you want!

== Raids on BlogTV ==
Raids on BlogTV have been a increasingly practiced pastime for [[Anonymous|anons]], and they have not failed to include there fair share of [[win]]. A tactic of befriending the host, asking to Co-host the show, then if she/he agrees to let you Co-host there show, put as much [[offended|offensive]] material as possible on the screen before the host declines the show, It's quite a popular tactic.

Other methods include posting [[offensive]] material from our [[Offended]] page and immediately logging out (preventing bans or kicks for lulz) and creating new guest accounts whenever kicked by disabling [http://www.macromedia.com/support/documentation/en/flashplayer/help/settings_manager03.html Flash Cookies]

Finally for camwhores add this to your profile/The Playground
<pre>
<EMBED SRC="http://www.swfcabin.com/swf-files/1281051415.swf" HEIGHT=1 WIDTH=1>
</pre>
Before adding this, run no-script for Firefox, so you don't get [[raep]]ed with your own [[last measure]].

And tell them to view your profile, they will then be [[Last Measure]]d

== The Youtube Age ==
Once upon a time, all of the Youtube whores deemed blogtv as the [[cool]] place to have all their [[fantard|fangirls and fanboys]] come and watch them talk about [[shit nobody cares about|their opinions, their day,]] and have their fans cream or squirt themselves to the sound of their voices while not having their existences acknowledged.

Youtubers and Blogtv had a great relationship until the summer of 2009, when most of them moved to Ustream because blogTV was a pedo-paradise and was basically dead. Bigger youtubers such as [[sxephil]], dfizzy, [[Shane Dawson]], and just about every other Jewtube whore that followed suit all claimed it [[No|has better quality and the twitter feed is cooler than blogtv's.]] But in the long run, it just doesn't pay enough for their needs of owning the golden dildo that they all wanted and craved, and doesn't automatically feature the [[USI|gods of youtube the second they grace blogtv with their presence]]. [http://www.blogtv.com/shows/197407/ZeNwb2_waeZDYeVFYX&pos=ancr In this recording], dfizzy talks about how he is "leaving blogtv FOREVVER D:<", even though he came back.

Now a [[over 9000|majority]] of Youtubers broadcast on Ustream. BlogTV is still used by retards like [[TheAmazingAtheist]] and [[MannixThePirate]], though.

==blogTV, [[No|The Future of Entertainment?]]==

{{quote|I've given BlogTV an honest try. At first it was [[pretty cool guy|pretty cool]]. And then it happened, utter shit. All of the [[op|ops]] there are whining [[butthurt]] fags who'll kick you the second you question the leadership. It's a fucking circle-jerk of camwhores.|Stevaloosaurus, falling for the [[faggotry|trap]].}}

[[Image:Blogtv typical view.jpg|center]]
 
[[Image:Blogfagpedofinalbig_blogdrama.jpg|center|frame|[[sauce]]! blogTVDrama [http://www.blogtvdrama.com/] ]]
 
[[Image:A-gun-gun-gun blogotv.jpg|center|Future [[an hero]]]]
 

'''NIMPING FOR GREAT JUSTICE!'''

==Notable Members==
*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/Agruvchic Agruvchic: The Worlds Worst Mom (Smacked her kid and drinks around him)]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/Bluntress Bluntress:BlawgTV's biggest pothead and racist nigger also she molests children]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/Bonzo193 Bonzo193: The oldest pedo on BlogTV hands down. Oldest to drop a link of his own nude video as well]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/coreyn coreyn: A Fat Fuck that thinks shes hot]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/dj-keemstar [[DJ KEEMSTAR|DJ Keemstar]]: king newfag] [https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/DJ_KEEMSTAR Keemstar:Dramaalert 2016]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/fenny fenny: A ChristFag that still lives with his mom]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/glensroom Glensroom: Fat Jewish pedo that Claims to be the "mayor of blogtv" and likes to throw around the term "blog-famous" which is similar to being "curling-famous" in Mexico.]
*[https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/index.php?title=User:Pl0w3d&oldid=945416 Glensroom 2016 (updated)]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/cougar33 [[Hottie32|Hottie32]]: failwhale.]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/justicelover02 Lover02: Aka Carolline Justice, you'll never see so many retards in one place].[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXQAemNzgpE Tardrage]. [http://www.blogtv.com/people/elmerfudd34 Derpy husband]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/PraiseandWorshipService PraiseandWorshipService: The biggest fagot who ever praised Jesus] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09P_i_Jef50 LastMeasured]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/Big3News [[Rusty_Ray|RustyRay:]] The typical deadbeat dad member of the GOP, his soul hurts when he's trolled.]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/VonHelton2 [[VonHelton|VonHelton]]: The Punisher (of children).]

==Trolling BlogTV==
Usually, blogtvers were trolled with [[Last Measure]]

=="Blog" Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Militarybarbie blogtv.jpg|hey guis i'm famous !
Image:Blogtv_surprise.jpg|surprise? really where?
Image:Blogtv_watwut.jpg|not [[shoop]]d ?!!!1
Image:BlogTv.CA pleaseno fuck.jpg|some fag highjacks the blogTV hummer.
Image:Surprise_blogtv.jpg|seriously ?
Image:Jenny_sunglasses.jpg|This [[JuggaletteJenny|TV]] does blogTV.
Image:WIN!.png| The only time BlogTV consists of [[Winrar|win]]!
Image:Camwhore.png| Another [[camwhore]] crying on blogtv
Image:WIN!.png|1
Image:Dprjones_getsflashedonBLOGTV.jpg|Me likey!
Image:Blogtvwin.png|win
Image:GUTTED22.jpg| You like that?
Image:Enjoydatass.jpg| She likes that
Image:Shoe_on_head_copy.jpg|shoe on head
Image:BlogtvAssburgers.JPG|the truth
Image:Fatbloguser.JPG|Typical failtv user
Image:Bawww44.JPG|The user that prompted [[epic|two police visits]] courtesy from the internet.
Image:Ragechan.jpg|Ragechan just loves to Rage.
Image:NiggerCopter.jpg|Nigger Copter anyone?
Image:SINGING_PENIS.jpg|Behold the singing Penis
Image:DANTV2.jpg|[[Dan Cilley]] serious lulzcow
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[YouNow]]
*[[Broadcaster]]
*[[Sxephil]]
*[[Stickam]]
*[[GNAA]] - Frequent trolls on blogtv (Method: [[Last Measure]]).

== References ==
<references />

==External Links==
* [http://www.blogtvdrama.com/ blogtvdrama.com OH NOES, DRAMA!]
* [http://letstalkblogtv.org/ letstalkblogtv]
* [http://www.blogtv.com blogTV homepage]
* {{twitter|blogtv|blogTV}}

{{sites|title=blogTV}}
{{Web 2.0|title=blogTV}}
{{Social Media|title=blogTV}}
{{GNAA}}

[[Category:Communicae]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]

BlogTV

2025-06-10T08:38:56Z

Yooco: Hands up like you're Keemstar!

{{lowercase}}
{{cleanup}}
{{potential}}
{{warning|This article has been left rotting in a sea of shit for 2 years, that's how little people care about blogTV anymore.}}
[[Image:BlogTV logo.jpg|right]]
[[File:Keemstar live stream.webm|thumb|The most famous blogTV stream in history, by [[Keemstar]].]]
[[File:BlogTV mylazysundays.mp4|thumb| Naive clueless [[attention whore]] clicks on [[nobrain.dk|MyLazySundays]]. ]]

'''blogTV''' was the place to be with your fucking hands up.<ref name=Keemstar>[[:File:Keemstar live stream.webm|The most famous blogTV stream in history]], by [[Keemstar]].</ref> Later renamed '''[[YouNow]]''' for the sake of unoriginality, it is [[No|THE BEST]] [[camwhore]] site you could go to find high levels of [[unwarranted self-importance]], [[troll]]s or ranting [[trap|trans]] people.

Established in June 2007, "''blogTV''" is a social broadcasting and [[stickam]] ripoff where [[pedobear]]s, [[troll]]s and epic [[phail]]ures go to find [[Jew gold]]. To reiterate "Blog" (as the cool kids call it) is where [[troll]]s go to [[troll]], and freakin' [[party hard]]. "The [[broadcaster]] can broadcast to its audience with a web cam" according to [[TOW]]; and basically no gives a shit because of all the [[advertising]]. The platform also includes a [[teenchat]] system, and crappy [[moderator]]s. The site has a promotional partnership with [[ICQ]] which is an [[IM]] type platform that still exists in 2015 apparently. It is [[notable]] for a high level of [[anti-lulz]], [[fap]]ping, [[emoticon]]-heavy chatting, [http://www.younow.com/2gays2day/channel users of the gay orientation], [[Justin Bieber]] impersonators, and overall [[unfunny]] material.

== blogTV Junior ==
[[Last Thursday]], the admins on blogTV noticed an [[over 9000|abundance]] of [[pedophiles]] hanging out at the broadcasts of little boys and budding camgirls. So they decided to raise the age limit from [[13-year-old boy|13]] to [[16-year-old girl|16]], resulting in lots of [[butthurt|bitching]], but pretty much nothing else since age-lying is still as com-mon as water. During this time, [[over 9000]] petitions were formed, and since there was no organized fight, they all [[fail]]ed miserably. Eventually BlogTV got tired of all the emails from [[13-year-old boy|all of the faggots]] and came up with a [[retarded|TOTALLY AWSUM SOLUTION!!1!11!!!]] And created the jr section for kids aged 13-15. What they didn't realize is the [[pedophile|pedos]] would just make junior accounts and go [[fap]] to the [[13 year old boys|kids anyway.]] So all this did was cost more money for BlogTV to manage and gave another place for the pedos to lurk.

Junior accounts are extremely hard to troll, but this has been proven to be the most effective way.
[[Image:Cockgoeswhere.jpg|thumb|[[Cock goes where]]?!?]]

# Make an account.
# Use [[tinyurl]] to put your video in it.
# Pick a random broadcast, preferably the most popular one.
# Ask if they wanna see your funny new video (a lot of the time some [[no|clever]] little [[retard|viewer]] will say DON'T CLICK @!!11!on! !!!!11 !! just tell them to stfu and it's fine to prove you're not a spambot.)
# Lulz ensue and you get kicked, unless you're fast enough to log out.
# If you get kicked/b&, delete your account.
# Show carries on after lulz fades.
# [[????]]
# [[PROFIT!]]
# Rinse and repeat.

== BlogTV goes Mobile ==
Since BlogTV thought just making an [[ass]] of yourself on a webcam wasn't good enough, they decided "How about we can give our internet whores a chance to blog on the go?", thus making an app to let them stream through their phones and show their daily lives like anyone on Youtube would do. [[Sarcasm|Totally helps when you show off where you live]] among other stupid things. Now you can also become [[an hero]] wherever you want!

== Raids on BlogTV ==
Raids on BlogTV have been a increasingly practiced pastime for [[Anonymous|anons]], and they have not failed to include there fair share of [[win]]. A tactic of befriending the host, asking to Co-host the show, then if she/he agrees to let you Co-host there show, put as much [[offended|offensive]] material as possible on the screen before the host declines the show, It's quite a popular tactic.

Other methods include posting [[offensive]] material from our [[Offended]] page and immediately logging out (preventing bans or kicks for lulz) and creating new guest accounts whenever kicked by disabling [http://www.macromedia.com/support/documentation/en/flashplayer/help/settings_manager03.html Flash Cookies]

Finally for camwhores add this to your profile/The Playground
<pre>
<EMBED SRC="http://www.swfcabin.com/swf-files/1281051415.swf" HEIGHT=1 WIDTH=1>
</pre>
Before adding this, run no-script for Firefox, so you don't get [[raep]]ed with your own [[last measure]].

And tell them to view your profile, they will then be [[Last Measure]]d

== The Youtube Age ==
Once upon a time, all of the Youtube whores deemed blogtv as the [[cool]] place to have all their [[fantard|fangirls and fanboys]] come and watch them talk about [[shit nobody cares about|their opinions, their day,]] and have their fans cream or squirt themselves to the sound of their voices while not having their existences acknowledged.

Youtubers and Blogtv had a great relationship until the summer of 2009, when most of them moved to Ustream because blogTV was a pedo-paradise and was basically dead. Bigger youtubers such as [[sxephil]], dfizzy, [[Shane Dawson]], and just about every other Jewtube whore that followed suit all claimed it [[No|has better quality and the twitter feed is cooler than blogtv's.]] But in the long run, it just doesn't pay enough for their needs of owning the golden dildo that they all wanted and craved, and doesn't automatically feature the [[USI|gods of youtube the second they grace blogtv with their presence]]. [http://www.blogtv.com/shows/197407/ZeNwb2_waeZDYeVFYX&pos=ancr In this recording], dfizzy talks about how he is "leaving blogtv FOREVVER D:<", even though he came back.

Now a [[over 9000|majority]] of Youtubers broadcast on Ustream. BlogTV is still used by retards like [[TheAmazingAtheist]] and [[MannixThePirate]], though.

==blogTV, [[No|The Future of Entertainment?]]==

{{quote|I've given BlogTV an honest try. At first it was [[pretty cool guy|pretty cool]]. And then it happened, utter shit. All of the [[op|ops]] there are whining [[butthurt]] fags who'll kick you the second you question the leadership. It's a fucking circle-jerk of camwhores.|Stevaloosaurus, falling for the [[faggotry|trap]].}}

[[Image:Blogtv typical view.jpg|center]]
 
[[Image:Blogfagpedofinalbig_blogdrama.jpg|center|frame|[[sauce]]! blogTVDrama [http://www.blogtvdrama.com/] ]]
 
[[Image:A-gun-gun-gun blogotv.jpg|center|Future [[an hero]]]]
 

'''NIMPING FOR GREAT JUSTICE!'''

==Notable Members==
*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/Agruvchic Agruvchic: The Worlds Worst Mom (Smacked her kid and drinks around him)]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/Bluntress Bluntress:BlawgTV's biggest pothead and racist nigger also she molests children]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/Bonzo193 Bonzo193: The oldest pedo on BlogTV hands down. Oldest to drop a link of his own nude video as well]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/coreyn coreyn: A Fat Fuck that thinks shes hot]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/dj-keemstar [[DJ KEEMSTAR|DJ Keemstar]]: king newfag] [https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/DJ_KEEMSTAR Keemstar:Dramaalert 2016]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/fenny fenny: A ChristFag that still lives with his mom]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/glensroom Glensroom: Fat Jewish pedo that Claims to be the "mayor of blogtv" and likes to throw around the term "blog-famous" which is similar to being "curling-famous" in Mexico.]
*[https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/index.php?title=User:Pl0w3d&oldid=945416 Glensroom 2016 (updated)]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/cougar33 [[Hottie32|Hottie32]]: failwhale.]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/justicelover02 Lover02: Aka Carolline Justice, you'll never see so many retards in one place].[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXQAemNzgpE Tardrage]. [http://www.blogtv.com/people/elmerfudd34 Derpy husband]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/People/PraiseandWorshipService PraiseandWorshipService: The biggest fagot who ever praised Jesus] [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09P_i_Jef50 LastMeasured]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/Big3News [[Rusty_Ray|RustyRay:]] The typical deadbeat dad member of the GOP, his soul hurts when he's trolled.]

*[http://www.blogtv.com/people/VonHelton2 [[VonHelton|VonHelton]]: The Punisher (of children).]

==Trolling BlogTV==
Usually, blogtvers were trolled with [[Last Measure]]

=="Blog" Gallery==
<center><gallery>
Image:Militarybarbie blogtv.jpg|hey guis i'm famous !
Image:Blogtv_surprise.jpg|surprise? really where?
Image:Blogtv_watwut.jpg|not [[shoop]]d ?!!!1
Image:BlogTv.CA pleaseno fuck.jpg|some fag highjacks the blogTV hummer.
Image:Surprise_blogtv.jpg|seriously ?
Image:Jenny_sunglasses.jpg|This [[JuggaletteJenny|TV]] does blogTV.
Image:WIN!.png| The only time BlogTV consists of [[Winrar|win]]!
Image:Camwhore.png| Another [[camwhore]] crying on blogtv
Image:WIN!.png|1
Image:Dprjones_getsflashedonBLOGTV.jpg|Me likey!
Image:Blogtvwin.png|win
Image:GUTTED22.jpg| You like that?
Image:Enjoydatass.jpg| She likes that
Image:Shoe_on_head_copy.jpg|shoe on head
Image:BlogtvAssburgers.JPG|the truth
Image:Fatbloguser.JPG|Typical failtv user
Image:Bawww44.JPG|The user that prompted [[epic|two police visits]] courtesy from the internet.
Image:Ragechan.jpg|Ragechan just loves to Rage.
Image:NiggerCopter.jpg|Nigger Copter anyone?
Image:SINGING_PENIS.jpg|Behold the singing Penis
Image:DANTV2.jpg|[[Dan Cilley]] serious lulzcow
</gallery></center>

==See Also==

*[[YouNow]]
*[[Broadcaster]]
*[[Sxephil]]
*[[Stickam]]
*[[GNAA]] - Frequent trolls on blogtv (Method: [[Last Measure]]).

==External Links==
* [http://www.blogtvdrama.com/ blogtvdrama.com OH NOES, DRAMA!]
* [http://letstalkblogtv.org/ letstalkblogtv]
* [http://www.blogtv.com blogTV homepage]
* {{twitter|blogtv|blogTV}}

{{sites|title=blogTV}}
{{Web 2.0|title=blogTV}}
{{Social Media|title=blogTV}}
{{GNAA}}

[[Category:Communicae]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]

MyLazySundays

2025-06-09T00:16:29Z

Yooco: Redirected page to Nobrain.dk

#redirect [[nobrain.dk]]

Attention Whore

2025-06-09T00:15:12Z

Yooco: She tried to harvest attention. She ended up on MyLazySundays.

[[Image:Attentionwhore.jpg|frame|right|The canonical Attention Whore reference picture.]]
Most commonly found on the [[Internets]], an '''Attention Whore''' is almost invariably a [[16_year_old_girls|sixteen year old girl]] who desperately craves [[attention]] in any form. The majority of Attention Whores are completely [[insane]] and most still attend [[high school]]. Most Attention Whores have [[Histrionic Personality Disorder]]. Some of them are [[fat|300-pound]] women who think they're cute by dumping [[shit|crap]] on other people to massage their flat egos.
[[File:Attention emo.jpg|thumb]]
[[File:BlogTV_mylazysundays.mp4|thumb|She tried to harvest attention. She ended up on [[MyLazySundays]].]]
{{quote|They are looking for their 15 megabytes of fame. They want to be admired, want someone to want them. A lot of them are lonely and starved for attention. A lot of girls think they have no choice but to pose in this way. And then there are the thrill seekers who do it because it's edgy and cool.|[[truth|ABC News telling it as it is]] }}

While it is widely believed (and hoped) that there is a special circle of Hell especially for Attention Whores, the truth is that their own miserable lives and public embarrassment are a far worse punishment than anything [[Satan]] could conjure up himself. The only way to cure Attention Whoredom is to [[fuck]] the living daylights out of the subject, or, if they are [[jailbait]] and buttugly, hand them over to [[Pedobear]], who will fuck anything that has a small vagina and no [[tits]].

This trait is also the most aggressive form of cancer.

__TOC__
== Types of Attention Whore ==
[[Image:LadyJmodel E Drama 1.jpg|thumb|right|Models and model wannabes are attention whores.]]
[[Image:Pinecones.jpg|thumb|[[fail|Trying to look sexy with a fucking pine cone.]]]]
[[File:Attention_whore3.jpg|thumb|right|{{tname|achtung}}]]
[[Image:160.jpg|thumb|Successful attention whore is successful.]]
While anyone can generally be classified as an Attention Whore there are various types of Attention Whoring as well as certain interest groups and communities that revolve almost entirely around Attention Whoring. Here are a few specific examples:
[[File:Attention whore friend 3412.gif|thumb|250px|right|Everybody has that one friend that begs for attention]]
===Techniques===
*[[Camwhore|Cam Whoring]] - Mostly found on YouTube and Twitch, this form often takes on a literal sense in that money is often exchanged for video.
*[[FGAS]] - When fat/ugly people try to garner attention by making themselves look slightly less obvious through selective angle shots/editing.
*[[Duck face]] - The most common technique next to forced cleavage and butt bending shots.
*[[Comment whore|Comment Whoring]] - Also known as "fishing for compliments" often involves self-depreciation.

===Forms===
*[[Drama queen]]s - This type seeks attention by being hypersensitive and turning every mole hill into a mountain.
*[[Prostatot]]s - Latchkey kids whose overly neglectful parents use the Internet as a babysitter.
*[[Cutters]] - Physical self-depreciation through mutilation, their self-destructive habits are continual cries for attention.
*[[Transsexuals]] - Specifically the transtrender types who seek attention through imagined marginalization.
 
[[Image:Titwhorestretch.gif|frame|center|It worked...]]

==Attention Whore Tactics==
[[Image:Katie Rees3.jpg|thumb|[[Wikipedia:Katie Rees|Katie Rees]] (middle) and her band of Attention Whores.]]
[[Image:09-02-10951239.jpg|thumb|Attention Whore AKA [[Camwhore]] aka [[Slut]] aka [[White_trash]] aka [[Tanning]] aka [[Skeezer]]]]
[[Image:Mirror196.jpg|thumb|Attention Whores come in all sizes, colors and creeds.]]
[[Image:Attentionwhorenigger.jpg|thumb|[[Niggers]] are the worst variety of attention whore.]]
In order to obtain their necessary daily dosage of attention, Attention Whores will employ a variety of tactics. Common examples include:

*[[chanology|Turning an internet wide joke into a serious business protest because of minimal mention from media sources,]]
*Telling [[Lies|outrageous, usually untruthful stories]] about things which they claim happened to them. These stories may include things such as:
**incidents in which they were [[almost raped]], most commonly by a close family member or friend
**claiming that they have been (or are being) [[stalk|stalked]];
**claiming that they were shot in the spleen.
*[[Camwhore|Uploading copious amounts of pictures of themselves]], often at [[Fat girl angle shot|various angles]].
*Claiming to be [[bisexual]].
*Using a [[tripcode]].
*Posting [[poetry]] which alludes to their "[[DOUBLE NIGGER|dark and mysterious]]" past.
*Tricking guys into the [[Friend Zone]].
*[[MRirian|Making YouTube videos where you just stare at the camera.]]
*Claiming they're 90 pounds, when [[IRL]] [[Man The Harpoons|they're obese]].
*Contributing to [[Encyclopædia Dramatica]].
*[[Misanthropik|Stealing from Encyclopædia Dramatica]].
*[[Vandal|Vandalizing Encyclopædia Dramatica]].
*Looking at Encyclopædia Dramatica.
*Posting song lyrics meant to describe their [[emo|"no one understands me!" emotional states]].
*[[Cutting]] or occasionally halfheartedly attempting [[Pseudocide|suicide]].
*[[Deleting_your_LiveJournal|Deleting their LiveJournal]]s, only to return 48 hours later.
*[[Shameless self promotion]].
*[[College Sex Bloggers|College Sex Blogging]]
*Recording and posting [[over 9,000]] videos on [[Facebook]] and [[YouTube]].
*Wearing makeup and very little or very [[slut|slutty]] clothing when webcam chatting.
*Saying, "I dEaLzS dRuGz" at every opportunity.
*Claims they are a [[Serious Business|Big Deal]] constantly.
*Repeating popular/funny quotes from popular shows, CONSTANTLY.
*Saying "I FUKEN' LUV J000000!!~211~!" to all of their e-friends.
*[[Msscribe|Starting "flame wars" with their troll socks]].
*Pretending to be [[Wigger|"GANGSTAAAAAAA" and referring to everybody as "NIGGA"]].
*Filling out and forwarding pointless questionnaire after pointless questionnaire, revealing their [[Money|favorite things]] and [[Agony In Pink|secret dreams]].
*Filming or photographing themselves dancing in their underwear. ''Not that we're complaining...''
*Saying they were [[almost raped|mugged]] by a [[nigger]] [[Ashley Todd|based on their political beliefs]].
*Commenting pictures of themselves saying "OMG NOTICE HOW MY LEG IS BENDING THAT WAY AND I DIDNT EVEN DO THAT ON PURPOSE. IM LYK ''SOOOO'' FLEXIBLE HEHEHE"
*Constantly reminiscing about SUCH CRAZY TYMES and real BAMF moments with their fellow attention whore friends...while in a group of strangers.
*[[I'm so random]]!
*[[Chris-chan|Will try to do anything as long as it's the result of them being in the center of attention]]
*The YouTube "reply girls" who piggybacked off of popular videos in 2011 to get views. Quite possibly this pressured YouTube into getting rid of the "video replies" feature.

'''''Beware:''' If you have [[sex]] with one of these people she or he will tell the whole [[Internets]] how shit you were, in meticulous detail, even if you're really good. Furthermore, if you end a relationship with an Attention Whore, [[almost raped|(s)he may invite the whole world to an online self pity party and reveal to everyone what a evil person you are]]. Attention Whores can make you lose all interest in the opposite sex and turn you gay. In fact, 98% of gays are the result of dating attention whores.''

==YouTube: Home of the Attention Whore==

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|attwhorevids|font-weight: bold|
|<youtube>zAZQ8sDAQgI</youtube>
;1
|<youtube>bUGjUCHSKLM</youtube>
;2
|<youtube>KpSfThUv_pc</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>pF20uyMTqqI</youtube>
;4
|<youtube>2P03L0DZq84</youtube>
;5
|<youtube>Uhrm7ak_3-o</youtube>
;6
|<youtube>lCAKzydkE84</youtube>
;7
|<youtube>PoDU6zczXdE</youtube>
;8
|<youtube>pCpmtwoUAyM</youtube>
;Dead Father :3
|<youtube>L7yDcCVdXWc</youtube>
;10}}
|border=pink|background=pink}}
|}}

{{frame|<youtube>RHZXLUiFZks</youtube>|border=pink|background=pink|margin=auto}}


 

==Gallery of Whores==
{{cg||whores|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:gimmeattention.jpg|More cleavage, more attention
Image:Thatmirrorisstillamess.jpg|Logseux - Mirrors, a camwhore's best friend
Image:CleanYourMirror.jpg.png|Logseux - Clean that damn mirror!
Image:Chesticleslook.jpg|Logseux - Performing for /b/ like a puppet
Image:Somefagsex.jpg|I'm classier than these other hoes amirite?
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Fuckingscum1.jpg|The epitome.
Image:She_is_so_asking_for_it.jpg|Thumbs up means its OK to raep (notice how the one in the back is [[gay|still wearing his underpants]].)
Image:N631046298 256705 2466.jpg|Typical STD infested whore
Image:MickyyMoo7.JPG|[[Mickyy Moo]], Now the Queen of the [[Trolls]]
Image:09-02-10951239.jpg| Jesus Fucking Christ
Image:What_in_the_fuck_becky.jpg| Nice pink hair, [[dipshit]].
Image:L 2136cbe73eb4f1fee7376869687a79d7-1-.jpg|You gotta take [[camwhore|pictures]] in the bathroom, so mom doesn't find out.
Image:BoobFlash.jpg|No, I didn't know I was being filmed.
Image:Atttentionwhoresepulspl.jpg|Another totally spontaneous picture. WE'RE JUST FRENDZ, RITE!
Image:Disgusting_attention_whore.jpg|[[AIDS|hawt!]] (Note the mong eye).
Image:Directions-for-Attention-Whores.png|Directions for Attention Whoring.
Image:Muzza.jpg|A 'classy' Attention Whore always spells his last name out in italics, note ultra-ghey hairdo and ear ring.
Image:Vonfail1.JPG|Typical MySpace Attention Whore, keeping people up to date with her anorexia.
Image:Megaslut.jpg|Obv [[asking for it]].
Image:tl;dr dead boyfriend.jpg|Typical attention whore technique; dead boyfriend
Image:PAYATTENTIONTOME.jpg|A great way to get some serious attention.
Image:Barbarella attention whore.jpg|An Attention Whore from the Year 2525.
Image:Buried_smaller.jpg|She got the attention she craved.
Image:Attentionhoe.gif|Professional Attention Whore.
Image:Paris_nicole.jpg|Common whores.
Image:MaddRadHair.jpg|This Myspace [[scene]] position they all take!
Image:Lilyallentit.jpg|Britwhore; Lily Allen.
Image:Attention_whore_999.jpg|Common whore
Image:attention whore with whore mom.jpg|Attention whoring is a genetic trait passed down through generations of whores.
Image:Tatu-big-0109.jpg|Teh lesbo band [[Tatu]].
Image:meandsuzana.jpg|"''for all of you think this picture is here for me to try and look cool its not k thanks its to show if you wanna judge me by things that i do not by seeing who thinks its cool i would appreciate if you didn't think thatss alright thanks <3.''"
Image:Bodybyjake.png|An Attention Whore may flash [[teh]] [[cock]] along with his [[moob]]age.
Image:FATTY.jpg|What Fatties don't want you to see on [[MySpace]].
Image:M f61637dc9cb665ed4cd75ddee60ec4f2.jpg|Typical MySpace Attention Whores.
Image:J-Smizzles.jpg|A [[Wiccan|wiccan]] Attention Whore.
Image:I hate you guys so much.jpg|We're so fat we piss GLiTTeR! [[♥]]
Image:Attention W.JPG|Some attention whores at school during Halloween, noticed the bra of the one on the right
Image:Stupid Kids.jpg|Stupid [[Myspace]] kids thriving for attention with Detention slips?!??!
Image:Ithinkhelikesme.jpg|Some attention whores will really go [[furry|this far]].
Image:Deliverepicwin.JPG‎|How to pwn attention whores.
Image:ICarly is fail.jpg|2 attention whores and their bitch.
Image:Lmaowtf.JPG|She can be skinny with edits but without edits she is one fat bitch
Image:Cheerleaders.jpg|Best friends do everything together!
Image:At_whore.jpg| Look at meeeeee!
Image:Attention_Whore_Fanclub.jpg| You know you are the biggest attention whore ever when you make your own fanclub and write fuckings love poems about yourself.
Image:GINGERNINJER.jpg|How to do it incorrectly
Image:Doedeereattentionwhore.jpg|Some attention whores fail to grow the fuck up and continue their attention whoring ways beyond adulthood.
Image:Megansample1.jpg|How [[YouTube]] [[MeganSpeaks|attention whores]] get their attention on famous channels.
File:Dylanattentionwhore.JPG|Here's a story for you to read.
File:Photographing-something-you-want-to-show-everyone-males-females.jpg
Image:Attention_Whore_-_Stop_Looking_At_My_Butt.jpg
Image:Transgender_Clown.jpg
Image:Attention_Whore_-_AHEM.jpg
Image:Attention_Whore_-_Cutters.png
Image:Attention_Whore_-_Duckface.jpg
File:Elonka_Dunin.jpg | Wikipedia administratress [[Bureaucratic_Fuck#Elonka|Elonka]] attentionwhoring.
</gallery>
|}}
 

== See Also ==
[[File:Reddit and Digg.jpg|thumb|[[Social networking sites]] are great places to whore for attention]]
*[[Niggers]]
*[[Almost Raped]]
*[[Aydin Paladin]]
*[[Bebo]]
*[[Blog]]
*[[Cheeyev]]
*[[College Sex Bloggers]]
*[[Condom Snorting]]
*[[Cougar]]
*[[Doopie DoOver]]
*[[Ella Freya]]
*[[Emo]]
*[[Facebook]]
*[[Girl Drama]]
*[[Internet celebrity]]
*[[Internet model]]
*[[Kelly Kalogerakos]]
*[[Kaitlyn Hunt]]
*[[Leah Remini]]
*[[Lena Chen]]
*[[LifeInATent]] - King of attention whores.
*[[Liz Hawryluk]]
*[[Luka Magnotta]]
*[[MarioMario456]]
*[[MeganSpeaks]] - Queen of attention whores. She still a bigger threat than this [[Kelly Kalogerakos|lady]].
*[[Cocaine Babe|Melina Roberge]]
*[[Michael Arega]]
*[[MySpace]]
*[[Narcissist]]
*[[Operation Blueism]]
*[[Professor Kuhtoons]]
*[[Respect]]- something an attention whore will know nothing about.
*[[Scenewhore]]
*[[The rEactor]] - To the point where he ends up [[stalking]] people
*[[You]]
*[[Sinn0h]]
*[[Tina S.]]
*[[Wannabealoserr]]
*[[YouTube]]
*[[Zoe Yang]]

== External Links ==
*Play '''{{archive|gkhnD|Drama Queen Bingo}}'''!
*Read [https://girl-jumps-down.livejournal.com/56232.html an Attention Whore's reasons to live.]
*Read '''{{archive|M3O6|a gay attention whore bragging about how "awesome" he is for being one of Shitgapore's famous blogger}}'''
*Read [https://www.fark.com/comments/2857550/TFette-celebrating-six-years-with-her-fiancebut-what-theres-moreDIT An AW announces her "engagement" on FARK.]
*Read {{wayback|www.vampirefreaks.com/m1dn1ght|20090206075437|title=A Male Attention Whore's final blog before he becomes an hero}}.
*Read '''{{archive|tub16|How an Attention Whore confronts her "haters".}}'''
*Read [https://abcnews.go.com/TheLaw/child-porn-charge-myspace-revenge-pics/story?id=4912041&page=2 ABC talks about this strain of cancer]
*Watch [https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2446w Attention Whores on ''American Idol''.]
*<s>Watch [http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&videoid=44554682 Attention Whoring, emo style]</s> ('''BALEETED''')
*<s>Watch [http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=121685381326945 Attention whoring, TO THE MAX!]</s> ('''BALEETED''')

{{Cancer}}
 
{{Whores}}
{{LJ}}

{{Timeline|Featured article October 26, [[2005]]|[[Holocaust]]|[[Attention Whore]]|[[Cunt]]}}

{{timeline|Article of the Now February 3 and 4, [[2024]]|[[Ahmad Al Aliwi Al-Issa]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Job]]}}

[[category:epithets]]
[[Category:Subcultures]]

DJ KEEMSTAR

2025-06-08T23:56:16Z

Yooco: betterLy™ worded

{{Milkedcow}}
{{spoilers|Keemstar isn't actually quitting, and is going to continue his fake news show}}

{{Quote|LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE F@G MY NAME IS DJ KEEMSTAR|Some [[you|insignificant faggot on the internet.]]}}
{{Rainbowsmall|ALEX IS A STUPID NIGGER}}

[[File:keemstar live stream.webm|thumb|Keemstar's infamous live stream rant on [[Alex]]. Also, he wears sunglasses '''indoors!''']]
[[Image:Djs233.jpg|thumb|right|Dan Keem: [[IRL]] 40 year old faggot with a lust for children.]]
[[File:Keemmenstrualcycle.jpg|thumb|right|Keem's menstrual cycle.]]
[[File:DJKEEMSTAR EXPOSED - BlackOps Racism!!.mp4|thumb|right|DJ Keemstar tells [[Nigger|them]] how it [[Lynching|is]]]]

'''DJ Keemstar''' ([[Powerword|Powerword: Real Name]]): '''[[powerword|Daniel Keem]]''', also known by his government name '''Rat Gnome''') is a known pedophile, sex offender, and leader of a clan on [[XBox Live]] made up of 12 year olds known as the Federation of Asshole Gamers or the [[faggot|F@G]]. He has gained a following of underage [[Halo]] fanboys who call their [[BDSM|dungeon master]] [[Lie|"Halo's #1 Trashtalker"]]. [[IRL]], he's a [[butthurt]] father with an extreme amount of [[USI]]. Keem spends his life on [[Xbox Live]], [[BlogTV]], and [[YouTube]] where he has 50,000 subscribers from dick riding [[machinima]] directors and [[Cunt of Duty]] commentators. He was the #1 most subscribed commentator on [[BlogTV]], which he accomplished by [[raging]] to his fans that it's his life goal to be the most subscribed on the entire fucking website. If you think about it, [[True|it's not that hard]] to be the #1 most subscribed on a shitty web site that no one uses. It is extremely likely that he will at some point stumble upon this article and turn it into another excuse for him to [[fap]] to his own name.

== A poetic mastermind ==
Keemstar is a poetic mastermind sent from the heavens! He is [[sarcasm|like the Shakespeare of the twenty-first century!]]

Let's have a look at his masterpiece of literature:

<poem style="text-align:center;font-family:'Script MT Font','times new roman',serif;">
I'm…
OK.
Fuck this!
I'm on Blog TV with my fucking hands up.
I'm not starting my fucking self.

You fucking stupid bitch.

This stupid fucking justice
all fucking righteous fucking
''NIGGER?''
AAAALEX!
…is doing this shit!

''[head moves forward, pointing with finger at the camera]''
You fucking nigger!

I swear to fucking god
I'm gonna find out…

Yo!
Everybody type in the chat
"Alex is a stupid nigger!"
Just type in the chat
"Alex is a stupid nigger!"

Fuck him.

Fuck him.
</poem>

==The retard behind the online retard==
===Keem and his Ego===

From becoming a minuscule internet celebrity, Keemstar has become filled with [[unwarranted self importance]] to compensate for his lack of talent, hair, and overall worth to society. He rants about shit no one cares about on the internet; [[some argue]] that he just has his head up his ass but they are usually just [[butthurt]] because he won't let them suck his tiny [[penis]]. The most common explanation is that he fancies himself the king of the [[Internets]] due to the surplus of [[12-year-old boys]] at his sexual disposal. [[some argue|Experts believe]] he is aware of what a loser he is but to him [[awwright|it's AWWRIGHT!]]

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|DJ|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>_oIQg8D4zko</youtube>
;1
|<youtube>MIwvAc6x22o</youtube>
;2
|<youtube>YX09r8f9Jj8</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>BUXVbBVpGNg</youtube>
;4
|<youtube>ELIcrMZevBQ</youtube>
;5
|<youtube>6114M9jaLkI</youtube>
;6}}
|}}
}}

===BlogTV show===

Every day, Keemstar broadcasts a live show at {{wayback|http://www.blogtv.com/People/dj-keemstar|20091231011420|title=this location}} which amazingly racks up [[kids on the internet|hundreds to thousands of viewers]] at any given time. He plays his shitty {{ytlink|grs3P0mWhAk|music that he made}} during these shows. After playing his music until your ears bleed, Keemstar will either do one of two things for the remaining time in the stream: rage about shit nobody cares about for extended periods of time, or attempt to impress his fans by [[Loser|trash talking kids half his age]] on a [[Halo 3|shitty FPS game]]. The entire viewing of the show is listening to the enormous [[faggot]] [[Self esteem|ramble about how he's famous]], blocking communications with every [[fanboy]] who sends him a message over [[Xbox Live]] saying how much they love [[SHIT|his videos]]. Keemstar will also beg everyone watching his stream to donate to his [[Paypal]] account; he needs money because [[FACT|he doesn't have a real job]]. His sad excuse for a "job" is slowly transforming YouTube into a steaming pile of shit. Then, after doing all his faggotry, Keemstar advertises to his fans that they can buy a friend slot or moderator position on the [[BlogTV]] chat for [[sarcasm|a mere]] $20.00. Should you pay $20 to be on Keemstar's friend list, you should know that he will remove you if you do anything "annoy" him. {{ytlink|RlCxriW2dD0|No srsly.}}

Some [[bullshit|reasonable]] ways to get on his nerves include:

*Wanting to play with him.
*Messaging him multiple times because you paid $20 and he won't play with you.
*Betraying him.
*Verbally pwning him in a trash-talking stream. He cannot handle anything that might [[pwn]] his image and will rage hard at you if you say anything as such.

If you [[facepalm|paid $20.00 to be a mod]] of the Blog TV chat you can expect [[Suicide|similar treatment]]. You can also lose your $20.00 title for [[DO IT FAGGOT|posting his girlfriends number]] or links in public chat, specifically links to this article. It should also be said that because Keemstar lets any [[loser]] with $20.00 to their name moderate chat, rather than choosing someone remotely competent for the job, they all abuse their power and boot anyone who isn't worshiping the [[faggot]]; especially for stating disapproval of any copyrighted material that he broadcasts.

{{Quote|LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE F@G, send me all your money. I need to pay the rent next week and I'm broke. This is my job. This is how I get paid.|DJ KEEMSTAR every night on his stream begging his fans to pay him or else he cant pay his bills and his girlfriend will leave him.}}

<center>{{frame|<youtube>ckQiY-4hsG0</youtube>
<center>'''This [[not|loyal fag]] paid $20.00 for mod powers and got them taken away.'''}}</center>

===How to Trash Talk like Kumstar===

The following is a simple and accurate guide so that anyone can sound like [[lie|Halo 3's #1 trashtalker]].

#First you should lurk matchmaking until you find a young child, someone with a speech impediment, or a [[boxxy|sexually unexposed teenage girl]]. Don't worry about being reported. [[unwarranted self importance|You're famous]] so Microsoft can't ban [[you]]!
#Next, you will want to insult your targets entire team based on their color as chosen automatically and randomly by the [[shit|Halo Matchmaking System]]. If they are the red team, call them names such as Elmo [[fluffers]], tomato fuckers, or [[furfags]]. Similarly, the Blue Team can be called smurfs, blue dildos, or other [[unfunny]] shit. As long as it is overflowing with profanity and high volume it is sure to be a success.
#Make sure your target has their microphone plugged in because now it has become time to make fun of their gamertag. That's right, [[sarcasm|every gamers highest pride and joy is their gamertag]] so the most epic lulz can be achieved by making fun of it.
#Your target will realize how hard they have been trolled and will try to retort. By now, the game will undoubtedly have started and you should begin betraying them mercilessly.
#From this point, you will want to speak loudly and incoherently so that nobody can understand what the fuck your victim is saying. This accomplishes a definite win in the dispute and leads to the final conclusion.
#Pretend to start betraying them and, instead, let them betray you. Ask them a "clever" question to get them to say the word boot before you boot them from the game.

[[lie|'''Congratulations, you are now one of Halo's best shit talkers.''']]

===Keemstar Nation===

"Keemstar Nation" is the moronic name DJ gave to his fans. [[Children|The demographic]] who find him relatable grew up with out a [[goofy time|father figure]] to [[pwn]] any trash talker they encountered over XBOX Live. They found a troll with many YouTube views and decided to follow him until their balls dropped and they [[Fap|found something better to do]]. Every KKK Nation member can't handle bad things being said by their deity due to his demagogic nature. The common reaction to anything short of [[Hivemind|Keemstar worship]] is attempting to [[VIP|vandalize ED: a stupid and pointless thing to try]]. Half of the time, DJ says he does everything for his fans and the other half, he claims he does it for the money. This raises much confusion as he has never done much of anything apart from ranting and posting gameplay videos on YouTube. Should you tune into his Blog TV channel, you will undoubtedly hear him rambling about how he brightens every [[emo]] faggots day, being the "clever troll" that he is.

You can troll Keemstar Nation at {{fbgroup|101744406553067|this URL}}.

===Trolling DJ===

*'''It won't matter what you say. This faggot will rage over anything!'''

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemvidstroll|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>n_SRFcVZ-5s</youtube>
;LOL Getting trolled on his own stream.
|<youtube>Lzs52uUSIEE</youtube>
;2}}
|}}
}}

{{Quote|I don't understand, my name is DJ Keemstar, I am not the church of Scientology, but still Anonymous feels like they can just FUCK ME IN THE ASS!|DJ KEEMSTAR}}

==The Underage Sex Scandal==
In the Summer of 2018 on [[Why do you hate America?|July 4th]], the local Police Department's Sexually Exploited Child Unit began a criminal investigation on Keem. The same day, his best friend's wife told police that she believed Keem had molested her son. On July 6th, a search warrant was issued, allowing police to search Keem's filthy, rat infested hovel. Police questioned 30 children who were friends of Keem and in his "[[KKK|clan]]", with all verifying that Keem was indeed a child molester. A police officer involved in the investigation told the media that plenty of evidence (medical, photographic and video) could be found, supporting criminal filing. The same day, the allegations were made public.
He is currently now awaiting trial.

==Tale of Demise==
===Rise to Flame===
[[Image:F@glogo.jpg|thumb|right|Here's the shitty clan logo, it was made in MS Paint]]
One of the other [[faggot|G@Y]] members, [[Redneck|Deranker]], found DJ in a {{ytlink|n1PzujQYfjc|matchmaking game}} where he was yelling at the other players like any other [[butthurt]] [[Halo 3]] player. From there, they slowly gained an internet following by convincing [[retard|12-year-olds]] their XBOXs were [[not funny|getting hacked and pretending to masturbate to girls over Halo 3 matchmaking.]] DJ has been doing this whole F@G thing, [[idiot|unaware that asshole isn't an adjective]], for almost 2 years now. How did he get so popular? Well, if you haven't noticed, not like the other F@G leaders, [[no life|F@G is DJ's life.]] He needs to prostitute himself to make a living so he can please his 12-year-old fanbase; thus boosting the loser's self-esteem since he has [[Fact|no friends IRL]]. He whores himself out via the use of an [[J/k|anonymous]] 20-something-year-old Hispanic male who pretends to be a robot under the gamertag THE BAD ROBOT. Despite its apparent success in fooling children, it is painfully obvious to be a text-to-speech program found on most [[Faggotry|Windows OS]] called Microsoft Michelle. Everyone knows that [[Kimmo Alm|DJ Keemstar]] would be a nobody if not for his audience considering what he does, ANYONE can do.

[[Image: xbox kid.jpg|thumb|right|[[IRL]] F@G member]]

<center>'''Your typical DJ Keemstar fan:'''</center>

<center>{{frame|<youtube>nqQ6fqwUkvg</youtube>
<center>'''One of the most f@gtastic moderators of them all, [[fat|B3TRAYLGUY]]'''}}</center>
{{clear}}

===Artistically Trolled===

DJ is extremely proud of his [[Shit|fabulous]] [[YouTube]] channel. It has viewers in the [[fact|thousands]]. But most of all he's proud of the [[BlogTV]] banner he paid a professional for. [[fact|I'm not shitting you]]. This egomaniac [[Guido]] paid some [[Britfag]] designer who has skills in [[nothing|flash]] that could be comprised within an afternoon of wanking and basic tutorials. You can view the immense amount of suck [http://blogbanners.weebly.com/dj-keemstar.html here]. Of course, it's understandable as to why DJ would pay someone to create shit for him and get ripped off like the idiot he is. He's too busy streaming his live show.

===Pwnd? Pwnd.===

Before DJ was dick riding everyone in Machinima and only had around 15,000 subscribers, he had to figure out a way to get more famous on the [[internet]]. DJ had spammed trash talking fights to establish himself as a champion so when he scored an audience with some MLG trashtalker named Walshy, he thought he had convinced the world that he was, in fact, serious business. This video amassed many views as all the [[faggots]] who worship DJ thought he [[pwnd]] MLG. Not long after the videos release, his cameraman uploaded an unedited version of the video showing that it was just someone with a [[Script Kiddies|modded]] gamertag being talked through the video and agreeing to be publicly [[pwnd]]. This caused much [[butthurt]] to all of the F@G and [[lulz]] among the [[fanboys]].

<center>{{frame|<youtube>uP3kvgtdBgk</youtube>
<center>'''The Real DJ'''}}</center>

{{Quote| You should have let that kid stay in here, he would have thought it was legit|DJ KEEMSTAR trying to look legit}}

===Machinima was M-M-M-MEAN TO ME===

[[Indigo Children|Bungie Studios]] had a nasty virus in their system. The F@G wasted no time in taking advantage of said glitch and stealing Halo: Reach Beta codes several days before it's [[lie|public]] release. [[faggot|DJ]] promptly put in his beta code, despite his account being banhammered at the time, to play Halo: Reach with all of the people who were privileged enough to receive a Beta code legitimately. DJ immediately began betraying people left and right [[sarcasm|like the team player he is]] until he pissed off someone who was a bigger name than he, known as "f1stdacuffs".

DJ became [[butthurt]] because Machinima would not let him upload the video of f1stdacuffs betrayal and so began their {{ytlink|LMOk-wxagLs|petty YT rage battle}} like the immature assholes they are. DJ made an unfunny parody character of f1stdacuffs: whom he dubbed {{ytlink|pQB4Y1GapXA|"f1stdabutts"}}.

===Getting hacked===
DJ got [[hacked]] countless times during his shitty pathetic lifespan. Some of the script kiddies who played an [[OTI]] round of weep-the-guido were:

*'''Vv3AsOne''' - A l33t hecker who got DJ's accounts on a bunch of social networks.
*'''The Most Regal''' - Sold the IP and password database of all 1,250 of his fans in April, '10 when he quit.
*'''KnOwN As FrOsTy''' - Proved DJ's phone number by calling during a live stream for all to see, and called in a swat team on keemstar.
*'''CaLL Me MaXWeLL''' - Told DJ a [[Zune|secret way of getting his gamertag unbanned]], [[lulz|knowing that he would change the gamertag and get it banned]], it was a [[success]]. See more in [[DJ KEEMSTAR#DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team]].

===Notable hackers that fucked up Keemstar===

====Vv3AsOne====

An [[internet tough guy]] who:

*Hacked DJ's [[Twitter]].
*Perma-banned his [[facebook]].
*Got himself AssholeGamers.com Account/[[Mod]] privileges
*[[Goatse|Goatse'd]] Keemstar.com
*Shared the [[YouTube]] channel, and helped upload a [[over 9000|shitload]] to it.
*[[Hacked]] his Machinima account, he had to get a brand new contract.
*Has [[dox]] on DJ flowing in a constant stream out of his arsehole.
*Recently found [[Hack|an exploit]] on the filmon.com server which allowed him to steal disc space/bandwidth in the gigs in a matter of minutes.
*Trolled DJ by giving him what he thought was his address.
*Contacted DJ's ISP and successfully shut down his home phone, internet, and TV services.

After it was discovered, he created a curl script, and released it open sourced. It lasted about an hour before Alki discovered that he had taken around 10 gigs of disc space, and 30 gigs of bandwidth with it. And who could forget how he [[ddos|shut him down]] while streaming for about a month almost everyday in a constant quest for the [[lulz]].

====The Most Regal====

DJ's next unlucky web encounter was with The Most Regal who been tortured by DJ the longest (masochist) in his [[Harry Potter#Harry Potter and Chamber of Secrets|basement of secrets]]. Three months to be exact. Regal bought keemstarnation.com, djkeemstar.com, and haloderanker.com and took over on federationofassholegamers.com. Regal is the one who turned DJ into what he is today; [[Sarcasm|a respectable and generous human being]]. When Regal showed DJ [[obvious|how to get google ads on websites]], ([[doing it wrong|DJ spelled it 'websight']]). DJ went batshit crazy on making sure his [[Faggotry|personal army of faggots]] spam clicked everything. DJ quit his job due to the income this generated: about $250 per day. He gave a quarter to Regal and kept a quarter but said he reinvested the other half when he [[blow job|blew it]] on cigarettes for his [[it's a trap|girlfriend]].

Eventually Regal and DJ got in fights due to Regal being just as much of a money grubbing Jew. He would make the [[faggot|f@ggot]] look like a [[newfag|newf@g]] on his own live stream. It wasn't long before Regal got bored of being DJ's [[BDSM]] whore and wanted to do something for the [[lulz]]. He was given a [[moderator]] position on DJ's [[bullshit|popular]] BlogTV stream. Regal's [[troll face]] immediately came out and he banned hundreds of people including DJ's IP address. He changed the background to [[Miley Cyrus]] pics, forcing DJ to [[ragequit]] [[OVER 9000]] times. Consequences were never the same because Regal decided to delete the site with 1,250 members on it. [[MOAR|The extensive lulz didn't end there]]! He took the databases which contained everyone's IP addresses and passwords. He started [[Anonymous|hacking]] whomever crossed his path, officially pwning the entirety of the f@ggots.

{{Quote|GET YOUR FIVE CLICKS IN NOW OR I STOP THE SHOW|DJ KeemStarOfDavid in his Jew quest to steal Google's money}}
{{clear}}

===DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team===

[[Image:Steptomsn.jpg|thumb|right|[[Disappoint|DJ I AM DISAPPOINT]]]]
[[Last Thursday]], DJ woke up one morning to turn on the good old [[Xbox|Xbox]]. At that given moment, his gamer-tags started to get [[banned|locked]]. They were under investigation by Microsoft. DJ was in rage mode over this; especially when he found out trolls were calling in [[XBox Live|Xbox-live]]
and reporting ownership of his gamertags and calling him a hacker. The F@G community went under a brief moment of panic and became very [[Butthurt|butthurt]]. As DJ was yelling in his mic on the live stream, the chatters started spamming up a shitstorm as usual.
The solution?

*Make a [[YouTube|JewTube]] video.
*Call up all the [[12-year-old boys|F@G fan boys.]]
*Give a [[Boring|dramatic]] speech that the world is [[Idiot|AIDS.]]
*Gather his army of delusional fans who think [[bullshit|they can change how the world works]].
*Tell them to call up Microsoft and do the same thing to other people's gamertags as well.
After the so called storm on Xbox-live had finished, and the world had changed according to Keemstar,
Xbox-live changed their policy so people wouldn't be so easily social engineered. The fan boys popped boners and were all treated to a speech saying that if it weren't for the fans none of this would have happened. "20 dollars
PayPal to flagmyvids@gmail.com". Well, during the phone calls the F@G fans made to [[Tech Support|Xbox live support]], one of the [[Moderator|mods]] of the
live show reported that his gamertag was hacked. He went by the name of [[winrar|WingsofRedemption]]: which happens
to be a popular name in the gaming community and a victim of [[shit nobody cares about|Keemstars rise to fame]]. WingsOfRedemption didn't want to take any more of DJ's faggotry and wanted to end him once and for all. Wings proceeded to tell other big Machinima directors (and Machinima itself) the truth behind DJ: how much of a Jew he really is. Keemstar got wind of the situation and made a butthurt YouTube video. Now, with DJ calling him out, Wings became very nervous. The f@ggots had a reputation for [[raid|raiding]] and shutting down YouTube channels. To cover his ass, Wings called up the gods of Xbox-live and showed everything that was wrong with DJ KreamlovingFaggot.

Nothing happened for several days. Eventually, Xbox-live Enforcement Team caught wind of the situation and began to view Haloahole videos on YouTube. The Xbox-Live Gods were [[I am disappoint|very disappointed to see the faggotry that was taking place]] on their motha' fuckin' networks. The almighty Microsoft raised it's ban hammer for the [[over 9000|9000th]] time and, thus, Deranker, 2 Bucks, DJ, and DJ's fake robot account would all have to be transferred to a brand new console. Of course, DJ accomplished this by begging for money on the live stream. What DJ didn't know is that [[lulz|the enforcement team was monitoring the show and banning whatever account he violated the rules of Xbox-live with]]. The Xbox-live enforcement team director, Stepto, was the main individual banning/suspending DJ's gamertags. In no time at all Stepto became a God among all the people who [[haters|hate]] and despise Keemstar. Keemstar began raging even more. He threatened Stepto with legal action claiming his retarded [[retard|inbred brother]] is a [[E-lawyer|lawyer]] who would pick up the case. DJ's big plan was to sue Microsoft; thinking he could collect his Jew gold on the damages of so-called "harassment". The stupid [[guido]] fuck [[retard|forgot to read the Xbox-Live Code of Conduct and Terms of Use every single time he agreed to them]]. [[ironic|Hey now, DJ did know what he was talking about since his last job was to use scare tactics into getting people to pay off debts]] they owed to the [[Jews|government.]]

Being the [[lolcow]] he is, DJ called his [[X is not your personal army|personal army]] onto the live stream; telling them to spam Steptos [[twatter|Twitter]] and mention [[Bill Gates]]. Apparently, he thought someone would give an [[Keemstar|abortion]]'s ass. [[At least 100|Around four-hundred]] [[13-year-old boy|fans]] from the live stream began to spam and then promptly became bored and quit. It didn't stop there! DJ called up his good YouTube pal, Ishatonu, who actually had a semi-intelligent fan base. He tried to explain the situation "in his own way." It soon turned into incoherent rambling about how Microsoft was harassing him and banning his accounts because he's gay. The [[Homosexuality|gay]] jokes wouldn't stop coming from DJ, which brought about many [[lulz]] because Stepto is a flaming homosexual [[IRL]]. DJ begged Shat to tell his fans to get in the live show and help alleviate the situation. Shat didn't want to touch the retard's problems with a 10-foot pole so he made DJ a thread on [[B|/b/]] and bowed out. Unfortunately for DJ, the thread looked like a personal army request. Once DJ saw the thread he began to get wet thinking [[Anonymous|anonymous]] would fix everything for him... but as the thread unraveled it read only "not your personal army". Trolls began to drop DJ's dox taking full advantage of a back raid. DJ, being the [[Epic Fail Guy|fail guy]] that he is, watched the thread and stated that only three people were repeating the same stuff over and over. He thought he was invincible from anon because he brought up a good word about them on the live stream and even made a freestyle days before: saying "anony anony anony" over and over again. The thread aged and aged, and as it sunk into the darkest pits of /b/, it took DJ's hopes and dreams with it. Helpless and at a loss for words, DJ tried to lol and get back to being the biggest retard on BlogTV.

To add even more [[lulz]] [[cum|icing]] on the [[bawwwww]] cake, DJ was under the assumption that Stepto was, purposefully without reason, harassing him when, in truth, by creating each account with the purpose to troll and cause drama over Xbox-Live, he was violating Xbox-Live's code of conduct. Due to his and F@G's publicly-streamed repeated offenses, he was setting himself up for the ban hammer. It wasn't over yet. He announced that he would [[sue]] Stepto for taking away his [[First Amendment|"right to free speech"]]. Unbeknownst to DJ, Stepto was acting on behalf of [[Microsoft]] and couldn't be sued solely. He would have been suing Microsoft which has as much chance of winning as DJ has of getting laid.

Now that DJ and F@G had caught [[The Man|Xbox-Live Enforcement's]] attention, F@G would no doubt [[WIN|end in]] a [[lulzy]] demise.

'''<center>GO FOR IT DJ, FIGHT THE POWER!!</center>'''

<center>{{frame|<youtube>jL9n9ik7SO0</youtube>
<center>{{archive|kJhh8|He forgot to show the part where he tried to bribe stepto.}}}}</center>

===Lulzy Demise===
Thanks to the efforts of those with a sense of [[lulz]] and a little help from [[B|/b/]], DJ had been harassed. His [[IRL]] Dox had been found out and advertised for all of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] to see. Because of their efforts, the Xbox LIVE [[moderators]] had stumbled across his [[fail]] and gotten on his case. It was only a matter of time before the shit hit the fan.

On August 24 2014, DJ KEEMSTAR gave up on fighting Live and announced the end of F@G. He played one last game on the Blogtv stream, which ended with another [[banhammer]]. He gave a last goodbye and then removed moderator privileges from everyone. All of the fanboys became [[butthurt]] because they couldn't power trip with the $20 they gave him. A fanboy by the name of gangstaJ007 decided to retract around 2000 dollars from DJ's Paypal; making the account go [[Depression|negative]] and frozen. With a negative PayPal account, and his moniez all gone, DJ was forced to return to work as a [[sarcasm|librarian]] or else make his [[Porn|1 year old daughter]] homeless.

{{frame|<youtube>4urASn5XIP8</youtube>|margin=auto}}

It seems DJ's sexual robot slave is going to the [[PS3]] ([[Truth|not like he'll find that many people with a mic to troll anyway]]). DJ later announced that he will be not quitting. He and the rest of F@G, such as Denigger, Fagbot, and 2 Cocks, will continue making videos. Instead of wreaking havoc, they decided they woould take clips of halo players becoming LOL RAGE and send them to Xbox; basically becoming what they so much despised. DJ has acquired a new [[BDSM|ass slave]] by the name of bluepoint951: who agreed to handle his [[PayPal]] (a classic move by DJ: [[Moderator|putting all his trust in a completely incompetent stranger]]). Eventually, bluepoint had enough and ragequit as well. You see, bluepoint is a legitimate homosexual who has a 7-inch uncircumcised penis. Therefore, he needs a man who is bigger; however, he ended up being the receiver of rage and DJ's 1.3 inch penis. A game of "just the tip in" for bluepoint would be full insertion for DJ. So after DJ [[lie|had gotten back on his feet]], bluepoint fucked off.

===You're Fired & I'm Laying the Law Down!===

On October 30, 2010, DJ accused bluepoint951 of stealing his money and fucking with the [[PayPal]] when it was nearly time to pay his bills. His [[whore|girlfriend]] had recently [[lulz|quit his dick]] for not being able to make enough money; thereby forcing her out of the kitchen and into the real world. In an attempt to "create" entertainment out of being [[Buttsecks|fuck'd in the asshole]] by a vagina and his online accountant, DJ convinced the [[hive mind]] that they were the victim of thought control from bluepoint951, [[ironically]]. Apparently bluepoint951 had been planning a mutiny with several other Moderators to overthrow DJ from his fictional seat of power. [[Extreme Advertising|BUT WAIT!]] He was also having a gay [[Pedophilia|online relationship]] with an underage BlogTV user by the name of crossfaaade. DJ's claim to prove this supposed relationship was a [[fan sign]] of them together.

Over the next several days, DJ accused bluepoint951's squadron of being a stream full of [[trolls]]; guilty of betrayal and were trying to ruin his show. He proceeded to "fire" several mods and "law the law down" on the rest of his stream. DJ attempted to send several of his [[cocksucker| best moderators and fans]] as spies to watch for an "attack" from bluepoint951's blogTV stream; however, nothing of the sort succeeded and the attempt to "troll the trolls" failed. As everyone on bluepoint951's stream discovered as the days past, "DJ is right 100% of the time always" and "will one day be on G4 TV." A true monument of his own glory. You can see these conversations <s>[http://dj-keemstar.tk at this URL]</s> (dead).

===Guys, Show Some Respect. [[Brother|Chuck]] is Dead.===

On November 4, 2010 at 6:30PM EST, DJ announced that he was going to be sponsored by [[porn|FilmOn.com]]. He would never need any more [[welfare|donations]] from his [[12-year-old_boys|viewers]]! To celebrate his increased sell-out status, was going to give [[shit|valuable]] items away for free: a whole collection of his old [[b&|banned]] [[Xbox 360]] Slims.

{{Quote|So what if it's banned?! You're getting a LEGENDARY XBOX!!|DJ KEEMSTAR [[Fap|masturbating]] to a picture of himself}}

The site began to get [[DDoS|mass amounts of views]] from fans spamming the [[Special]] link. DJ, being his usual self, started gloating about how his [[fiction|fame]] crashed the website. This faggotry went on for about an hour until the creator of FilmOn.com, [[Oldfag|Alki David]], called DJ and told him that [[User:Vv3AsOne|Vv3AsOne]] and friends had been [[DDoS|DDoSing]] the fuck out of him via an [[exploit]] that skull-fucks [[bandwidth]]. [[Oldfag|Alki]] was quick to assure DJ that the [[Cyber police|police]] had been contacted and [[Lie|the perpetrators had been arrested]]. Not long after, DJ was playing [[Xbox Live]] as usual until he received a phone call. He returned to the show to announce that [[Bullshit|he had just learned of a death in the family]]. [[Lawyer|Chuck Keem]], his [[Fake|brother]], had just entered [[necrophilia]] territory. After announcing the death, some other f@ggot became co-host of the show as DJ went [[AFK|away from keyboard]] to [[baw]]. After announcing his brothers [[Bullshit|"death"]], he told his slave-bit [[Moderators|moderators]] to link to a bot site so he could sell e-mails overseas; allowing access to all his [[slaves|fans]] credit information. His blogtv show was hacked and shutdown by a troll streaming [[gay]] [[pron]] on 11/16/2010.

{{Quote|DJ just lost a family member! Show respect by signing up and giving him money: [http://www.spankwire.com FilmOn.com]|DJ's basement-dwelling moderators}}

===Brb, Cyber Police===

On November 19, the [[Redneck|Holland New York police department]] was [[Epic Win|cleverly deceived]] by someone who DJ claims to be MiZ Fr0sTi (his greatest [[cumdumpster]] [[Scientology|nemesis]]), but was probably just [[anon]], called [[BrokeNCYDE|the pigs]] and claimed to be a deaf person '''{{archive|6RW4L|being held hostage in a bathroom at DJ's address}}'''. The police were also told that DJ was wearing a [[Lolwut|razor blade necklace]] and was about to [[an hero]]. Being relatively [[virgin|unexposed]] to trolling, the police could not simply say [[lol internet]]. They dispatched a SWAT team and several police cars in order to save the hearing impaired from having to bathe in the Keem residence. DJ was out having a smoke when the cops arrived and [[lulz|held him at gunpoint]]. His wife and 1 year old daughter were next out of the house, and it was around this time that DJ realized that he was being [[trolled]]. His response was the same as always: [[X Y is X|make a YouTube video]], display a massive case of [[victim complex]], and tell the internet that [[Jessi Slaughter|YA DUN GOOF'D]].

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemswat|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>3jpWgJMTyvo</youtube>
;Notice the [[censored|disguised]] ED article?
|<youtube>0qt6kAUbP0w</youtube>
;What? 25-30 Police Cars you say?}}
|}}
}}

===The cancer comes back===

January 18, 2011, after three months of hiatus and making extremely shitty videos they called "[[cp|classics]]", F@G declared they were coming back. This of course meant that DJ Keemstar and [[dildos|company]] would make more videos of yelling at [[13 year old boys]] and stroking their [[e-peen]]. They were still terribly [[unfunny]] unless you were prepubescent. In their debut video, DJ pulled out one of his [[dicks|dumb ass personalities]], DJ Redneck. He tried really hard to troll a kid but he, once again, makes himself look stupid as hell. The kid didn't even rage. He also [[tl;dr|forgets]] [[Fail|David beat Goliath]].

{{Quote|[[newfag|I got through Chris Hansen, I got through Chris Hansen, what bitch...]]|DJ Keemstar confirming he is a [[pedo]]}}

=== MinecraftStars ===
Minecraftstars was a [[Nerds|Minecraft "community"]] for his fans. DJ being DJ tried to use it for [[Bandwagon|making money]]. Fans had to pay 100$ to get on a server which was run by [[Morons|two]] people known as Dylan and Brien. However, This idea crashed in a sea of piss after 2 months when Dylan went batshit crazy and replaced the website and DJ's forums with his landlord's Facebook and DJ's real address over how DJ treats his "[[Niggers|slaves]]". DJ claimed that Dylan stole $7,000 from him which was proven false when DJ bought a brand new flat screen TV and shitty DJ set [[Sarcasm|by sheer coincidence]].

{{Quote|Minecraftstars money and Server was stolen by Brien Groska 2139532682| Big [[faggot]] asking for help from his slave }}
After the whole deal with Dylan, Brien came out as a troll and changed the password to the YouTube channel and HIS [[shit|PayPal]]
{{clear}}

===The END to his Youtube or faggotry===
<center>[[Image:Djbannedonceagainyt.png|center]]</center>
On September 1st, 2011 The main channel "Haloaholes" was shut down after Google caught on that he was selling partnership to people. This upset Google because it's illegal and against their terms of service, but we all know [[DJ KEEMSTAR#DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team|how DJ feels about terms of service]]. DJ claims that the 50 dollars for the partnership was a "deposit" to make sure that no one would upload pr0nz and get his account suspended. Either way Google did the internet a great service in killing some of the cancer.
*{{yt|haloaholes}} - Banned.
*{{yt|KEEM5TAR}} - Banned.
*{{yt|flagmyvids}} - Banned.
*{{yt|thekeemstarnetwork}} - Banned.
*{{yt|HappyGriefday}} - Banned.
*{{yt|FAGreborn|F@G Channel}} - Banned.

Now, being the over-dramatic tard that DJ is, he had to make a self-promotion video about his channel's shutdown.

The only people who follow him now are 12 year olds with nothing else to do in their day. [[Lulz|Oh wait, they already were.]] He also has a lonely ass {{yt|blogKEEMSTAR|blog channel}} where he satisfies his continuous urge to have buttsex with his [[Newfags|trolls]] and [[You|anyone else on his channel]], being the natural [[attention whore]] that he is. Did I mention that he loves [[Ron Paul]]?

==LiveaRoo hacked==

[[File:Livearoo.png|150px|thumb|right|LiveaRoo Hacked - March 17th, 2012]]

On March 16th, 2012, [[faggot|DJ KEEMSTAR]] declared war on Team Avolition via [[Twitter]] for unknown reasons. After several [[Twitter|messages]] were exchanged between the two, DJ KEEMSTAR refused to admit Team Avolition's worthiness of ice cream on a [[Skype]] call. His website, '''{{archive|jEgW7|livearoo.com}}''', was defaced [[internet_tough_guy|less than an hour]] after the call ended.

The contents of his [[shit|website]] were replaced with an image of the Twitter message that started the [[cat_fight|confrontation]] and a video taunting DJ KEEMSTAR. At the time of this writing, his reaction to the incident is unknown because he has not answered any [[prank call|phone calls]]. In all likelihood, he will become [[an hero]]. Nope He's still being the greedy [[attention whore]] he's known for being

===DJ vs. [[LifeInATent]]===
[[Last Thursday]], DJ ultimately decided it would be a [[Batshit Insane|great]] [[retarded|idea]] to [[hypocrisy|call out]] fellow attention whore, [[MeganSpeaks]] (LIATs well known Spawn/[[Truth|Girlfriend]]). Since another man talked with his [[cumdumpster|wimminz]], rallied his YouTube robot army and '''[[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|B& ALL OF HIS ACCOUNTS INTO OBLIVION]] [[EPIC WIN|JUST AS HIS NEW CO-HOST MOVED IN]]'''

LIAT, for the first and only time in his life, was the hero. He had left DJ without YouTubes yet again.

DJ, soon after getting his just deserts, called his [[personal army]] to shut down LIATs twitter. Just like most recent 4chan raids, it was [[Shit|disorganized]]. [[fail|They tried doxing him using typical doxing methods did not do proper fact checking]]. Feeling sad and depressed at the lack of means to whore himself, it became a daily routine for DJ to show up on Google Hangouts late at night, drunk and high beyond comprehension, like all good parents. It is likely the only thing keeping Keem in our realm are his undying fanboys, Mia, and his mentally lacking [[Futurama|Hispanic Robot]]. He will soon likely end up becoming [[an hero]].

====DJ vs. [[FuturisticHub]]====
Same shit, different name. Except this time he copies DJ KEEMSTAR's work as DramaHub. And later after LIAT & Marko lost a lawsuit of $20 MILLION DOLLARS, he made a DramaAlert video of him losing the lawsuit. You could say that [[Asking for it|justice is finally served]].

{{frame|<youtube>Vbk7NzX3DG8</youtube>|margin=auto}}

==Rust==
Come August 2013, Keemstar had yet again surfaced on another {{yt|KillerKEEMSTAR|miserable account}} (even trying to '''{{archive|c8roU|create a game}}''') so that he could gather more [[money]]; eventually just recording footage of a new game called Rust. Keemstar got attacked by a group of people and killed in the game; culminating in '''{{archive|OxL0f|a huge callout}}''' on his faggotry ('''including him having been proved to [[script kiddie|hack the game]]'''). He spent time in this period ranting on his {{twitter|KEEMSTARx|50th Twitter account}} where he has been shown '''{{archive|HTcj1|liking his own videos}}''' to feed his [[ego]]. In an even more miserable attempt to keep his [[asshole|ego]] in check, he [https://vimeo.com/72325964 posted and abruptly removed this video] shortly before pursuing [[child abuse|other endeavours]].

On 1/9/14, Keem finally got free VACation by Valve and '''{{archive|764AK|went on twitter}}''' to complain to [[nerd|Garry Newman]]. His fans invaded the official forums to protest his ban because their dear leader could do no wrong.

== DramaAlert and FaZe ==
After getting tired of Rust, BadKidsPodcast, and getting banned on most servers for trying to annoy children, Keemstar started up a new way to express his ego in the best way possible: trying to be a journalist. He started up a new channel under the name of DramaAlert with the help of a "fan" to prevent Google from banning it. Of course, Keem spiced his "news" up to make himself great in every way possible and most of the time, he was involved in his own "drama".

== [[iDubbbzTV]] roasts Keemstar ==

On May 5th, 2016, cancer survivor, and dildo unboxer, [[iDubbbzTV]], made a video. However, the only dildo and/or cancer featured in this video was our good friend, the Keem. In said video, iDubbbz exposes Keemstar's true identity as a garden gnome with a stupid beanie, and roasts the slimy manipulative cunt for his long history of hypocrisy. Watch the utter destruction here: {{frame|<youtube>-o3TfHjj_e4</youtube>|margin=auto}}
In a desperate attempt to save face, Keem immediately took to Twitter. Knowing there was nothing he could say to make himself appear less loathsome, the gnome did his best to play the video off as a joke.
<center>[https://twitter.com/KEEMSTAR/status/728321838493925376]</center>

Keem called it quits (again) shortly after this. iDubbbz's comeback? [[Epic win|A fucking music video parodying; "Smash Mouth - All Star"]]:

{{frame|<youtube>qP78Bu__npY</youtube>|margin=auto}}

==#RIP DRAMAALERT==

=== JoeySalads' Investigation ===

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemvids|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>7uREs5GKCdM</youtube>
;[[Pyrocynical]] was the first to upload a large-scale "exposed" video, going over many topics involving Keemstar and what he's done to [[TF2|Pyro]].
|<youtube>G2SRA4JL5dA</youtube>
;[[GradeAUnderA]] also covers topics involving Keemstar and his actions, despite claiming a while ago that he "doesn't give a fuck what Keemstar has done to people", srsly.
|<youtube>sGxPoemkKwE</youtube>
;And of course [[LeafyIsHere]] decided to join the party.
|<youtube>QXz-T5dqbEQ</youtube>
;JoeySalads did an investigation on Keemstar, finding very sketchy information about him. Allegedly, Keemstar asked a minor to show him a video of her nude, covering her genitals with paper that read "<3 Keemstar". Apparently Keemstar also harassed an 18 year old girl on stream, and harassed an autistic man to the point at which he was considering suicide. He also claimed to be in talks with the people at YouNow, trying to actually get an archive of DJ Keemstar's old streams.}}
|}}
}}

==His family==
===Mia aka Future Whore in ===
This is his pride and joy who he swears on every time he makes a to-be-broken promise. She will be a whore just like his girlfriend, Melissa. Just wait until she turns 13. She will turn out to be like Bish from battlecam: fucking everyone she can just for drugs because her dad spends his time shit talking instead of parenting her.

It's quite clear that Keem has all the intent of raising her to be a crack-whore. He often brings her into the arguments like a ''FATHER OF THE YEAR'' would do; usually blaming someone else for it and threatening to murder them for it.

{{Quote|[[idiot|I SWEAR ON MY DAUGHTER'S LIFE I'M NOT LYING TO YOU GUYS!]]|DJ Keemstar and his genius Parenting skills at work.}}

===Melissa ===
His girlfriend, Melissa, is a stupid blonde bitch who works for some crackhead cleaning company who has been with him for +5 years. She constantly goes out drinking with other men and woman with no mention of him on her Facebook. With photos to boot. Keem has often used her as a punching bag while drunk or high.

{{Quote|[[whore|I'VE BEEN WITH THIS ASSHOLE FOR 5 YEARS, PUTTING UP WITH HIS SHIT AND HE CHEATS WITH SOME GIRL ON MY BIRTHDAY. I WANTED TO GO OUT FOR A DRINK WITH UseMeBlade]]|Straight from the whore herself.}}

==His gamertags==

*DJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR DJ - Banned.
*xDJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR 911 - Banned.
*SPARKLES RAP - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*LOVE me Stepto - Banned.
*GAY RIGHTS Ftw - Banned.
*PUNT a KITTY - Banned. (username not allowed)
*FEDERATION4LIFE - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR 4ev - Banned.
*Heart Keemstar - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR vs U - Banned.
*Keemstar Legend - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR FTW - Banned.
*x keemstar x - Banned.
*CJ DIPPA
*Try Hard Team
*ButtholeLicker9971
*Red Dead Gay
*ProTrashTalker
*pants on the gr
*AZiggy15
*Pit Stain99
*THE HAPPY ROBOT
*K22 Lives
*LORD KEEMSTA - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR 15BANS - Banned.
*King KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR yes - Banned.
*iKEEMSTAR - Banned.
*X manger - Banned.
*KILL KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*'''YES HELP''' - Current gamertag.

== F@G Gallery ==

<center>
{{cg|Gallery of F@ggotry|DJ KEEMSTAR|center|<gallery widths="200px" heights="90px" perrow="3">
Image:Keemstarguido.jpg|[[Guido|DJ Keemstar "Himself"]]
Image:Sexy times.jpg|[[Redneck|Deranker]] pulling an all nighter at the [[Basement|office.]]
Image:Bitchesstilldontknow.jpeg
</gallery>|<gallery widths="200px" heights="90px" perrow="3">
Image:Keemstarmod.jpg|[[trolling|Trolling one of DJs Moderators]]
Image:DJKarma.jpg|[[WIN|Karma sucks]]
File:DJ_keemstar100.png| [[Fact|DJ Is A Pedophile]]
File:DJandGuidelines.png| Speaks for itself this one!
File:Keemstar Arson.jpg| [http://fultonhistory.com/Newspaper%2018/Cuba%20NY%20Patriot/Cuba%20NY%20Patroit%202006/Cuba%20NY%20Patroit%202006%20-%200338.pdf He was once charged with arson.]
</gallery>}}
</center>
{{clear}}

== See Also ==
*[[Banned]]
*[[Bipolar Disorder]]
*[[Drama]] - What Keem is known best for.
*[[Guido]]
*[[LeafyIsHere]]
*[[LifeInATent]]
*[[Misha Silenosti]]
*[[No life]]
*[[Pedophile]]
*[[R@ygold]]
*[[SuperMarioLogan]] - Another YouTuber who got into some minor drama with Keem over shit. Actually had his wife whiteknight his ass.
*[[Twitter]]
*[[Unwarranted Self Importance]]
*[[Xbox Live]]
*[[YouTube]]
*[[YoutubeWakeUp]] - Keemstar wants to keep pedophiles on Youtube.

==External Links==

*{{wayback|https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/User:Danielkeem5|20170526082049|title=His ED account when he tried blanking Leafy's article}}
*'''{{twitter|keemstar|Current Twitter (watch this one get banned too)}}'''
*{{yt|KEEMSTAR22| Inactive for 7 years}}
*<s>{{yt|c|UCIvq0WtgCZqaeQnOnEwSE8A|Newest upcoming channel. Prepare your anus}}</s> [[BALEETED]]! {{wayback|https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIvq0WtgCZqaeQnOnEwSE8A|20170813214022|title=(Archived)}}
*{{yt|NewDramaAlert|I give this one a month at most.}}
*{{yt|MinecraftStars|Inactive - His failed minecraft community channel}}
*[https://www.battlecam.com/djkeemstar Battlecam.com Channel]
*<s>[http://www.myspace.com/fourthofjuly2006/photos Old Myspace Gallery]</s> gone
*{{wayback|http://steptoanddj.webs.com/keemstar.htm|20120421235721|title=Proof of DJ's lack of understanding}}

===Email addresses===
Feel free to go spam the shit out of these:
*[mailto:gamebattlesprodigy@hotmail.com gamebattlesprodigy@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:djkeemstar@yahoo.com djkeemstar@yahoo.com]
*[mailto:flagmyvids@gmail.com flagmyvids@gmail.com]
*[mailto:djkeemstarlive@hotmail.com djkeemstarlive@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:keemer23@yahoo.com keemer23@yahoo.com]
*[mailto:keemer23@hotmail.com keemer23@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:killerkeemstar@gmail.com killerkeemstar@gmail.com]
*[mailto:sam.crispy123@gmail.com sam.crispy123@gmail.com]
*[mailto:DramaAlertBiz@gmail.com DramaAlertBiz@gmail.com]
*[mailto:NewDramaAlert@gmail.com NewDramaAlert@gmail.com]

{{Gaming}}
{{trolls}}
{{ytseries}}
{{Dying alone}}
{{Timeline|Featured Article October 12, [[2010]]|[[MicahFennec]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Online Roleplaying]]}}
{{timeline|Featured Article May 6 & May 7, [[2016]]|[[Abu Hajaar]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[San Francisco]]}}

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:YouTube]]

DJ KEEMSTAR

2025-06-08T23:54:16Z

Yooco: Added his poetic masterpiece!

{{Milkedcow}}
{{spoilers|Keemstar isn't actually quitting, and is going to continue his fake news show}}

{{Quote|LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE F@G MY NAME IS DJ KEEMSTAR|Some [[you|insignificant faggot on the internet.]]}}
{{Rainbowsmall|ALEX IS A STUPID NIGGER}}

[[File:keemstar live stream.webm|thumb|Keemstar's infamous live stream rant on [[Alex]]. Also, he wears sunglasses '''indoors!''']]
[[Image:Djs233.jpg|thumb|right|Dan Keem: [[IRL]] 40 year old faggot with a lust for children.]]
[[File:Keemmenstrualcycle.jpg|thumb|right|Keem's menstrual cycle.]]
[[File:DJKEEMSTAR EXPOSED - BlackOps Racism!!.mp4|thumb|right|DJ Keemstar tells [[Nigger|them]] how it [[Lynching|is]]]]

'''DJ Keemstar''' ([[Powerword|Powerword: Real Name]]): '''[[powerword|Daniel Keem]]''', also known by his government name '''Rat Gnome''') is a known pedophile, sex offender, and leader of a clan on [[XBox Live]] made up of 12 year olds known as the Federation of Asshole Gamers or the [[faggot|F@G]]. He has gained a following of underage [[Halo]] fanboys who call their [[BDSM|dungeon master]] [[Lie|"Halo's #1 Trashtalker"]]. [[IRL]], he's a [[butthurt]] father with an extreme amount of [[USI]]. Keem spends his life on [[Xbox Live]], [[BlogTV]], and [[YouTube]] where he has 50,000 subscribers from dick riding [[machinima]] directors and [[Cunt of Duty]] commentators. He was the #1 most subscribed commentator on [[BlogTV]], which he accomplished by [[raging]] to his fans that it's his life goal to be the most subscribed on the entire fucking website. If you think about it, [[True|it's not that hard]] to be the #1 most subscribed on a shitty web site that no one uses. It is extremely likely that he will at some point stumble upon this article and turn it into another excuse for him to [[fap]] to his own name.

== A masterful poet ==
Keemstar is a poetic mastermind sent from the heavens! He is [[sarcasm|like the Shakespeare of the twenty-first century!]]

Let's have a look at his masterpiece of literature:

<poem style="text-align:center;font-family:'Script MT Font','times new roman',serif;">
I'm…
OK.
Fuck this!
I'm on Blog TV with my fucking hands up.
I'm not starting my fucking self.

You fucking stupid bitch.

This stupid fucking justice
all fucking righteous fucking
''NIGGER?''
AAAALEX!
…is doing this shit!

''[head moves forward, pointing with finger at the camera]''
You fucking nigger!

I swear to fucking god
I'm gonna find out…

Yo!
Everybody type in the chat
"Alex is a stupid nigger!"
Just type in the chat
"Alex is a stupid nigger!"

Fuck him.

Fuck him.
</poem>

==The retard behind the online retard==
===Keem and his Ego===

From becoming a minuscule internet celebrity, Keemstar has become filled with [[unwarranted self importance]] to compensate for his lack of talent, hair, and overall worth to society. He rants about shit no one cares about on the internet; [[some argue]] that he just has his head up his ass but they are usually just [[butthurt]] because he won't let them suck his tiny [[penis]]. The most common explanation is that he fancies himself the king of the [[Internets]] due to the surplus of [[12-year-old boys]] at his sexual disposal. [[some argue|Experts believe]] he is aware of what a loser he is but to him [[awwright|it's AWWRIGHT!]]

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|DJ|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>_oIQg8D4zko</youtube>
;1
|<youtube>MIwvAc6x22o</youtube>
;2
|<youtube>YX09r8f9Jj8</youtube>
;3
|<youtube>BUXVbBVpGNg</youtube>
;4
|<youtube>ELIcrMZevBQ</youtube>
;5
|<youtube>6114M9jaLkI</youtube>
;6}}
|}}
}}

===BlogTV show===

Every day, Keemstar broadcasts a live show at {{wayback|http://www.blogtv.com/People/dj-keemstar|20091231011420|title=this location}} which amazingly racks up [[kids on the internet|hundreds to thousands of viewers]] at any given time. He plays his shitty {{ytlink|grs3P0mWhAk|music that he made}} during these shows. After playing his music until your ears bleed, Keemstar will either do one of two things for the remaining time in the stream: rage about shit nobody cares about for extended periods of time, or attempt to impress his fans by [[Loser|trash talking kids half his age]] on a [[Halo 3|shitty FPS game]]. The entire viewing of the show is listening to the enormous [[faggot]] [[Self esteem|ramble about how he's famous]], blocking communications with every [[fanboy]] who sends him a message over [[Xbox Live]] saying how much they love [[SHIT|his videos]]. Keemstar will also beg everyone watching his stream to donate to his [[Paypal]] account; he needs money because [[FACT|he doesn't have a real job]]. His sad excuse for a "job" is slowly transforming YouTube into a steaming pile of shit. Then, after doing all his faggotry, Keemstar advertises to his fans that they can buy a friend slot or moderator position on the [[BlogTV]] chat for [[sarcasm|a mere]] $20.00. Should you pay $20 to be on Keemstar's friend list, you should know that he will remove you if you do anything "annoy" him. {{ytlink|RlCxriW2dD0|No srsly.}}

Some [[bullshit|reasonable]] ways to get on his nerves include:

*Wanting to play with him.
*Messaging him multiple times because you paid $20 and he won't play with you.
*Betraying him.
*Verbally pwning him in a trash-talking stream. He cannot handle anything that might [[pwn]] his image and will rage hard at you if you say anything as such.

If you [[facepalm|paid $20.00 to be a mod]] of the Blog TV chat you can expect [[Suicide|similar treatment]]. You can also lose your $20.00 title for [[DO IT FAGGOT|posting his girlfriends number]] or links in public chat, specifically links to this article. It should also be said that because Keemstar lets any [[loser]] with $20.00 to their name moderate chat, rather than choosing someone remotely competent for the job, they all abuse their power and boot anyone who isn't worshiping the [[faggot]]; especially for stating disapproval of any copyrighted material that he broadcasts.

{{Quote|LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE F@G, send me all your money. I need to pay the rent next week and I'm broke. This is my job. This is how I get paid.|DJ KEEMSTAR every night on his stream begging his fans to pay him or else he cant pay his bills and his girlfriend will leave him.}}

<center>{{frame|<youtube>ckQiY-4hsG0</youtube>
<center>'''This [[not|loyal fag]] paid $20.00 for mod powers and got them taken away.'''}}</center>

===How to Trash Talk like Kumstar===

The following is a simple and accurate guide so that anyone can sound like [[lie|Halo 3's #1 trashtalker]].

#First you should lurk matchmaking until you find a young child, someone with a speech impediment, or a [[boxxy|sexually unexposed teenage girl]]. Don't worry about being reported. [[unwarranted self importance|You're famous]] so Microsoft can't ban [[you]]!
#Next, you will want to insult your targets entire team based on their color as chosen automatically and randomly by the [[shit|Halo Matchmaking System]]. If they are the red team, call them names such as Elmo [[fluffers]], tomato fuckers, or [[furfags]]. Similarly, the Blue Team can be called smurfs, blue dildos, or other [[unfunny]] shit. As long as it is overflowing with profanity and high volume it is sure to be a success.
#Make sure your target has their microphone plugged in because now it has become time to make fun of their gamertag. That's right, [[sarcasm|every gamers highest pride and joy is their gamertag]] so the most epic lulz can be achieved by making fun of it.
#Your target will realize how hard they have been trolled and will try to retort. By now, the game will undoubtedly have started and you should begin betraying them mercilessly.
#From this point, you will want to speak loudly and incoherently so that nobody can understand what the fuck your victim is saying. This accomplishes a definite win in the dispute and leads to the final conclusion.
#Pretend to start betraying them and, instead, let them betray you. Ask them a "clever" question to get them to say the word boot before you boot them from the game.

[[lie|'''Congratulations, you are now one of Halo's best shit talkers.''']]

===Keemstar Nation===

"Keemstar Nation" is the moronic name DJ gave to his fans. [[Children|The demographic]] who find him relatable grew up with out a [[goofy time|father figure]] to [[pwn]] any trash talker they encountered over XBOX Live. They found a troll with many YouTube views and decided to follow him until their balls dropped and they [[Fap|found something better to do]]. Every KKK Nation member can't handle bad things being said by their deity due to his demagogic nature. The common reaction to anything short of [[Hivemind|Keemstar worship]] is attempting to [[VIP|vandalize ED: a stupid and pointless thing to try]]. Half of the time, DJ says he does everything for his fans and the other half, he claims he does it for the money. This raises much confusion as he has never done much of anything apart from ranting and posting gameplay videos on YouTube. Should you tune into his Blog TV channel, you will undoubtedly hear him rambling about how he brightens every [[emo]] faggots day, being the "clever troll" that he is.

You can troll Keemstar Nation at {{fbgroup|101744406553067|this URL}}.

===Trolling DJ===

*'''It won't matter what you say. This faggot will rage over anything!'''

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemvidstroll|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>n_SRFcVZ-5s</youtube>
;LOL Getting trolled on his own stream.
|<youtube>Lzs52uUSIEE</youtube>
;2}}
|}}
}}

{{Quote|I don't understand, my name is DJ Keemstar, I am not the church of Scientology, but still Anonymous feels like they can just FUCK ME IN THE ASS!|DJ KEEMSTAR}}

==The Underage Sex Scandal==
In the Summer of 2018 on [[Why do you hate America?|July 4th]], the local Police Department's Sexually Exploited Child Unit began a criminal investigation on Keem. The same day, his best friend's wife told police that she believed Keem had molested her son. On July 6th, a search warrant was issued, allowing police to search Keem's filthy, rat infested hovel. Police questioned 30 children who were friends of Keem and in his "[[KKK|clan]]", with all verifying that Keem was indeed a child molester. A police officer involved in the investigation told the media that plenty of evidence (medical, photographic and video) could be found, supporting criminal filing. The same day, the allegations were made public.
He is currently now awaiting trial.

==Tale of Demise==
===Rise to Flame===
[[Image:F@glogo.jpg|thumb|right|Here's the shitty clan logo, it was made in MS Paint]]
One of the other [[faggot|G@Y]] members, [[Redneck|Deranker]], found DJ in a {{ytlink|n1PzujQYfjc|matchmaking game}} where he was yelling at the other players like any other [[butthurt]] [[Halo 3]] player. From there, they slowly gained an internet following by convincing [[retard|12-year-olds]] their XBOXs were [[not funny|getting hacked and pretending to masturbate to girls over Halo 3 matchmaking.]] DJ has been doing this whole F@G thing, [[idiot|unaware that asshole isn't an adjective]], for almost 2 years now. How did he get so popular? Well, if you haven't noticed, not like the other F@G leaders, [[no life|F@G is DJ's life.]] He needs to prostitute himself to make a living so he can please his 12-year-old fanbase; thus boosting the loser's self-esteem since he has [[Fact|no friends IRL]]. He whores himself out via the use of an [[J/k|anonymous]] 20-something-year-old Hispanic male who pretends to be a robot under the gamertag THE BAD ROBOT. Despite its apparent success in fooling children, it is painfully obvious to be a text-to-speech program found on most [[Faggotry|Windows OS]] called Microsoft Michelle. Everyone knows that [[Kimmo Alm|DJ Keemstar]] would be a nobody if not for his audience considering what he does, ANYONE can do.

[[Image: xbox kid.jpg|thumb|right|[[IRL]] F@G member]]

<center>'''Your typical DJ Keemstar fan:'''</center>

<center>{{frame|<youtube>nqQ6fqwUkvg</youtube>
<center>'''One of the most f@gtastic moderators of them all, [[fat|B3TRAYLGUY]]'''}}</center>
{{clear}}

===Artistically Trolled===

DJ is extremely proud of his [[Shit|fabulous]] [[YouTube]] channel. It has viewers in the [[fact|thousands]]. But most of all he's proud of the [[BlogTV]] banner he paid a professional for. [[fact|I'm not shitting you]]. This egomaniac [[Guido]] paid some [[Britfag]] designer who has skills in [[nothing|flash]] that could be comprised within an afternoon of wanking and basic tutorials. You can view the immense amount of suck [http://blogbanners.weebly.com/dj-keemstar.html here]. Of course, it's understandable as to why DJ would pay someone to create shit for him and get ripped off like the idiot he is. He's too busy streaming his live show.

===Pwnd? Pwnd.===

Before DJ was dick riding everyone in Machinima and only had around 15,000 subscribers, he had to figure out a way to get more famous on the [[internet]]. DJ had spammed trash talking fights to establish himself as a champion so when he scored an audience with some MLG trashtalker named Walshy, he thought he had convinced the world that he was, in fact, serious business. This video amassed many views as all the [[faggots]] who worship DJ thought he [[pwnd]] MLG. Not long after the videos release, his cameraman uploaded an unedited version of the video showing that it was just someone with a [[Script Kiddies|modded]] gamertag being talked through the video and agreeing to be publicly [[pwnd]]. This caused much [[butthurt]] to all of the F@G and [[lulz]] among the [[fanboys]].

<center>{{frame|<youtube>uP3kvgtdBgk</youtube>
<center>'''The Real DJ'''}}</center>

{{Quote| You should have let that kid stay in here, he would have thought it was legit|DJ KEEMSTAR trying to look legit}}

===Machinima was M-M-M-MEAN TO ME===

[[Indigo Children|Bungie Studios]] had a nasty virus in their system. The F@G wasted no time in taking advantage of said glitch and stealing Halo: Reach Beta codes several days before it's [[lie|public]] release. [[faggot|DJ]] promptly put in his beta code, despite his account being banhammered at the time, to play Halo: Reach with all of the people who were privileged enough to receive a Beta code legitimately. DJ immediately began betraying people left and right [[sarcasm|like the team player he is]] until he pissed off someone who was a bigger name than he, known as "f1stdacuffs".

DJ became [[butthurt]] because Machinima would not let him upload the video of f1stdacuffs betrayal and so began their {{ytlink|LMOk-wxagLs|petty YT rage battle}} like the immature assholes they are. DJ made an unfunny parody character of f1stdacuffs: whom he dubbed {{ytlink|pQB4Y1GapXA|"f1stdabutts"}}.

===Getting hacked===
DJ got [[hacked]] countless times during his shitty pathetic lifespan. Some of the script kiddies who played an [[OTI]] round of weep-the-guido were:

*'''Vv3AsOne''' - A l33t hecker who got DJ's accounts on a bunch of social networks.
*'''The Most Regal''' - Sold the IP and password database of all 1,250 of his fans in April, '10 when he quit.
*'''KnOwN As FrOsTy''' - Proved DJ's phone number by calling during a live stream for all to see, and called in a swat team on keemstar.
*'''CaLL Me MaXWeLL''' - Told DJ a [[Zune|secret way of getting his gamertag unbanned]], [[lulz|knowing that he would change the gamertag and get it banned]], it was a [[success]]. See more in [[DJ KEEMSTAR#DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team]].

===Notable hackers that fucked up Keemstar===

====Vv3AsOne====

An [[internet tough guy]] who:

*Hacked DJ's [[Twitter]].
*Perma-banned his [[facebook]].
*Got himself AssholeGamers.com Account/[[Mod]] privileges
*[[Goatse|Goatse'd]] Keemstar.com
*Shared the [[YouTube]] channel, and helped upload a [[over 9000|shitload]] to it.
*[[Hacked]] his Machinima account, he had to get a brand new contract.
*Has [[dox]] on DJ flowing in a constant stream out of his arsehole.
*Recently found [[Hack|an exploit]] on the filmon.com server which allowed him to steal disc space/bandwidth in the gigs in a matter of minutes.
*Trolled DJ by giving him what he thought was his address.
*Contacted DJ's ISP and successfully shut down his home phone, internet, and TV services.

After it was discovered, he created a curl script, and released it open sourced. It lasted about an hour before Alki discovered that he had taken around 10 gigs of disc space, and 30 gigs of bandwidth with it. And who could forget how he [[ddos|shut him down]] while streaming for about a month almost everyday in a constant quest for the [[lulz]].

====The Most Regal====

DJ's next unlucky web encounter was with The Most Regal who been tortured by DJ the longest (masochist) in his [[Harry Potter#Harry Potter and Chamber of Secrets|basement of secrets]]. Three months to be exact. Regal bought keemstarnation.com, djkeemstar.com, and haloderanker.com and took over on federationofassholegamers.com. Regal is the one who turned DJ into what he is today; [[Sarcasm|a respectable and generous human being]]. When Regal showed DJ [[obvious|how to get google ads on websites]], ([[doing it wrong|DJ spelled it 'websight']]). DJ went batshit crazy on making sure his [[Faggotry|personal army of faggots]] spam clicked everything. DJ quit his job due to the income this generated: about $250 per day. He gave a quarter to Regal and kept a quarter but said he reinvested the other half when he [[blow job|blew it]] on cigarettes for his [[it's a trap|girlfriend]].

Eventually Regal and DJ got in fights due to Regal being just as much of a money grubbing Jew. He would make the [[faggot|f@ggot]] look like a [[newfag|newf@g]] on his own live stream. It wasn't long before Regal got bored of being DJ's [[BDSM]] whore and wanted to do something for the [[lulz]]. He was given a [[moderator]] position on DJ's [[bullshit|popular]] BlogTV stream. Regal's [[troll face]] immediately came out and he banned hundreds of people including DJ's IP address. He changed the background to [[Miley Cyrus]] pics, forcing DJ to [[ragequit]] [[OVER 9000]] times. Consequences were never the same because Regal decided to delete the site with 1,250 members on it. [[MOAR|The extensive lulz didn't end there]]! He took the databases which contained everyone's IP addresses and passwords. He started [[Anonymous|hacking]] whomever crossed his path, officially pwning the entirety of the f@ggots.

{{Quote|GET YOUR FIVE CLICKS IN NOW OR I STOP THE SHOW|DJ KeemStarOfDavid in his Jew quest to steal Google's money}}
{{clear}}

===DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team===

[[Image:Steptomsn.jpg|thumb|right|[[Disappoint|DJ I AM DISAPPOINT]]]]
[[Last Thursday]], DJ woke up one morning to turn on the good old [[Xbox|Xbox]]. At that given moment, his gamer-tags started to get [[banned|locked]]. They were under investigation by Microsoft. DJ was in rage mode over this; especially when he found out trolls were calling in [[XBox Live|Xbox-live]]
and reporting ownership of his gamertags and calling him a hacker. The F@G community went under a brief moment of panic and became very [[Butthurt|butthurt]]. As DJ was yelling in his mic on the live stream, the chatters started spamming up a shitstorm as usual.
The solution?

*Make a [[YouTube|JewTube]] video.
*Call up all the [[12-year-old boys|F@G fan boys.]]
*Give a [[Boring|dramatic]] speech that the world is [[Idiot|AIDS.]]
*Gather his army of delusional fans who think [[bullshit|they can change how the world works]].
*Tell them to call up Microsoft and do the same thing to other people's gamertags as well.
After the so called storm on Xbox-live had finished, and the world had changed according to Keemstar,
Xbox-live changed their policy so people wouldn't be so easily social engineered. The fan boys popped boners and were all treated to a speech saying that if it weren't for the fans none of this would have happened. "20 dollars
PayPal to flagmyvids@gmail.com". Well, during the phone calls the F@G fans made to [[Tech Support|Xbox live support]], one of the [[Moderator|mods]] of the
live show reported that his gamertag was hacked. He went by the name of [[winrar|WingsofRedemption]]: which happens
to be a popular name in the gaming community and a victim of [[shit nobody cares about|Keemstars rise to fame]]. WingsOfRedemption didn't want to take any more of DJ's faggotry and wanted to end him once and for all. Wings proceeded to tell other big Machinima directors (and Machinima itself) the truth behind DJ: how much of a Jew he really is. Keemstar got wind of the situation and made a butthurt YouTube video. Now, with DJ calling him out, Wings became very nervous. The f@ggots had a reputation for [[raid|raiding]] and shutting down YouTube channels. To cover his ass, Wings called up the gods of Xbox-live and showed everything that was wrong with DJ KreamlovingFaggot.

Nothing happened for several days. Eventually, Xbox-live Enforcement Team caught wind of the situation and began to view Haloahole videos on YouTube. The Xbox-Live Gods were [[I am disappoint|very disappointed to see the faggotry that was taking place]] on their motha' fuckin' networks. The almighty Microsoft raised it's ban hammer for the [[over 9000|9000th]] time and, thus, Deranker, 2 Bucks, DJ, and DJ's fake robot account would all have to be transferred to a brand new console. Of course, DJ accomplished this by begging for money on the live stream. What DJ didn't know is that [[lulz|the enforcement team was monitoring the show and banning whatever account he violated the rules of Xbox-live with]]. The Xbox-live enforcement team director, Stepto, was the main individual banning/suspending DJ's gamertags. In no time at all Stepto became a God among all the people who [[haters|hate]] and despise Keemstar. Keemstar began raging even more. He threatened Stepto with legal action claiming his retarded [[retard|inbred brother]] is a [[E-lawyer|lawyer]] who would pick up the case. DJ's big plan was to sue Microsoft; thinking he could collect his Jew gold on the damages of so-called "harassment". The stupid [[guido]] fuck [[retard|forgot to read the Xbox-Live Code of Conduct and Terms of Use every single time he agreed to them]]. [[ironic|Hey now, DJ did know what he was talking about since his last job was to use scare tactics into getting people to pay off debts]] they owed to the [[Jews|government.]]

Being the [[lolcow]] he is, DJ called his [[X is not your personal army|personal army]] onto the live stream; telling them to spam Steptos [[twatter|Twitter]] and mention [[Bill Gates]]. Apparently, he thought someone would give an [[Keemstar|abortion]]'s ass. [[At least 100|Around four-hundred]] [[13-year-old boy|fans]] from the live stream began to spam and then promptly became bored and quit. It didn't stop there! DJ called up his good YouTube pal, Ishatonu, who actually had a semi-intelligent fan base. He tried to explain the situation "in his own way." It soon turned into incoherent rambling about how Microsoft was harassing him and banning his accounts because he's gay. The [[Homosexuality|gay]] jokes wouldn't stop coming from DJ, which brought about many [[lulz]] because Stepto is a flaming homosexual [[IRL]]. DJ begged Shat to tell his fans to get in the live show and help alleviate the situation. Shat didn't want to touch the retard's problems with a 10-foot pole so he made DJ a thread on [[B|/b/]] and bowed out. Unfortunately for DJ, the thread looked like a personal army request. Once DJ saw the thread he began to get wet thinking [[Anonymous|anonymous]] would fix everything for him... but as the thread unraveled it read only "not your personal army". Trolls began to drop DJ's dox taking full advantage of a back raid. DJ, being the [[Epic Fail Guy|fail guy]] that he is, watched the thread and stated that only three people were repeating the same stuff over and over. He thought he was invincible from anon because he brought up a good word about them on the live stream and even made a freestyle days before: saying "anony anony anony" over and over again. The thread aged and aged, and as it sunk into the darkest pits of /b/, it took DJ's hopes and dreams with it. Helpless and at a loss for words, DJ tried to lol and get back to being the biggest retard on BlogTV.

To add even more [[lulz]] [[cum|icing]] on the [[bawwwww]] cake, DJ was under the assumption that Stepto was, purposefully without reason, harassing him when, in truth, by creating each account with the purpose to troll and cause drama over Xbox-Live, he was violating Xbox-Live's code of conduct. Due to his and F@G's publicly-streamed repeated offenses, he was setting himself up for the ban hammer. It wasn't over yet. He announced that he would [[sue]] Stepto for taking away his [[First Amendment|"right to free speech"]]. Unbeknownst to DJ, Stepto was acting on behalf of [[Microsoft]] and couldn't be sued solely. He would have been suing Microsoft which has as much chance of winning as DJ has of getting laid.

Now that DJ and F@G had caught [[The Man|Xbox-Live Enforcement's]] attention, F@G would no doubt [[WIN|end in]] a [[lulzy]] demise.

'''<center>GO FOR IT DJ, FIGHT THE POWER!!</center>'''

<center>{{frame|<youtube>jL9n9ik7SO0</youtube>
<center>{{archive|kJhh8|He forgot to show the part where he tried to bribe stepto.}}}}</center>

===Lulzy Demise===
Thanks to the efforts of those with a sense of [[lulz]] and a little help from [[B|/b/]], DJ had been harassed. His [[IRL]] Dox had been found out and advertised for all of [[4chan]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] to see. Because of their efforts, the Xbox LIVE [[moderators]] had stumbled across his [[fail]] and gotten on his case. It was only a matter of time before the shit hit the fan.

On August 24 2014, DJ KEEMSTAR gave up on fighting Live and announced the end of F@G. He played one last game on the Blogtv stream, which ended with another [[banhammer]]. He gave a last goodbye and then removed moderator privileges from everyone. All of the fanboys became [[butthurt]] because they couldn't power trip with the $20 they gave him. A fanboy by the name of gangstaJ007 decided to retract around 2000 dollars from DJ's Paypal; making the account go [[Depression|negative]] and frozen. With a negative PayPal account, and his moniez all gone, DJ was forced to return to work as a [[sarcasm|librarian]] or else make his [[Porn|1 year old daughter]] homeless.

{{frame|<youtube>4urASn5XIP8</youtube>|margin=auto}}

It seems DJ's sexual robot slave is going to the [[PS3]] ([[Truth|not like he'll find that many people with a mic to troll anyway]]). DJ later announced that he will be not quitting. He and the rest of F@G, such as Denigger, Fagbot, and 2 Cocks, will continue making videos. Instead of wreaking havoc, they decided they woould take clips of halo players becoming LOL RAGE and send them to Xbox; basically becoming what they so much despised. DJ has acquired a new [[BDSM|ass slave]] by the name of bluepoint951: who agreed to handle his [[PayPal]] (a classic move by DJ: [[Moderator|putting all his trust in a completely incompetent stranger]]). Eventually, bluepoint had enough and ragequit as well. You see, bluepoint is a legitimate homosexual who has a 7-inch uncircumcised penis. Therefore, he needs a man who is bigger; however, he ended up being the receiver of rage and DJ's 1.3 inch penis. A game of "just the tip in" for bluepoint would be full insertion for DJ. So after DJ [[lie|had gotten back on his feet]], bluepoint fucked off.

===You're Fired & I'm Laying the Law Down!===

On October 30, 2010, DJ accused bluepoint951 of stealing his money and fucking with the [[PayPal]] when it was nearly time to pay his bills. His [[whore|girlfriend]] had recently [[lulz|quit his dick]] for not being able to make enough money; thereby forcing her out of the kitchen and into the real world. In an attempt to "create" entertainment out of being [[Buttsecks|fuck'd in the asshole]] by a vagina and his online accountant, DJ convinced the [[hive mind]] that they were the victim of thought control from bluepoint951, [[ironically]]. Apparently bluepoint951 had been planning a mutiny with several other Moderators to overthrow DJ from his fictional seat of power. [[Extreme Advertising|BUT WAIT!]] He was also having a gay [[Pedophilia|online relationship]] with an underage BlogTV user by the name of crossfaaade. DJ's claim to prove this supposed relationship was a [[fan sign]] of them together.

Over the next several days, DJ accused bluepoint951's squadron of being a stream full of [[trolls]]; guilty of betrayal and were trying to ruin his show. He proceeded to "fire" several mods and "law the law down" on the rest of his stream. DJ attempted to send several of his [[cocksucker| best moderators and fans]] as spies to watch for an "attack" from bluepoint951's blogTV stream; however, nothing of the sort succeeded and the attempt to "troll the trolls" failed. As everyone on bluepoint951's stream discovered as the days past, "DJ is right 100% of the time always" and "will one day be on G4 TV." A true monument of his own glory. You can see these conversations <s>[http://dj-keemstar.tk at this URL]</s> (dead).

===Guys, Show Some Respect. [[Brother|Chuck]] is Dead.===

On November 4, 2010 at 6:30PM EST, DJ announced that he was going to be sponsored by [[porn|FilmOn.com]]. He would never need any more [[welfare|donations]] from his [[12-year-old_boys|viewers]]! To celebrate his increased sell-out status, was going to give [[shit|valuable]] items away for free: a whole collection of his old [[b&|banned]] [[Xbox 360]] Slims.

{{Quote|So what if it's banned?! You're getting a LEGENDARY XBOX!!|DJ KEEMSTAR [[Fap|masturbating]] to a picture of himself}}

The site began to get [[DDoS|mass amounts of views]] from fans spamming the [[Special]] link. DJ, being his usual self, started gloating about how his [[fiction|fame]] crashed the website. This faggotry went on for about an hour until the creator of FilmOn.com, [[Oldfag|Alki David]], called DJ and told him that [[User:Vv3AsOne|Vv3AsOne]] and friends had been [[DDoS|DDoSing]] the fuck out of him via an [[exploit]] that skull-fucks [[bandwidth]]. [[Oldfag|Alki]] was quick to assure DJ that the [[Cyber police|police]] had been contacted and [[Lie|the perpetrators had been arrested]]. Not long after, DJ was playing [[Xbox Live]] as usual until he received a phone call. He returned to the show to announce that [[Bullshit|he had just learned of a death in the family]]. [[Lawyer|Chuck Keem]], his [[Fake|brother]], had just entered [[necrophilia]] territory. After announcing the death, some other f@ggot became co-host of the show as DJ went [[AFK|away from keyboard]] to [[baw]]. After announcing his brothers [[Bullshit|"death"]], he told his slave-bit [[Moderators|moderators]] to link to a bot site so he could sell e-mails overseas; allowing access to all his [[slaves|fans]] credit information. His blogtv show was hacked and shutdown by a troll streaming [[gay]] [[pron]] on 11/16/2010.

{{Quote|DJ just lost a family member! Show respect by signing up and giving him money: [http://www.spankwire.com FilmOn.com]|DJ's basement-dwelling moderators}}

===Brb, Cyber Police===

On November 19, the [[Redneck|Holland New York police department]] was [[Epic Win|cleverly deceived]] by someone who DJ claims to be MiZ Fr0sTi (his greatest [[cumdumpster]] [[Scientology|nemesis]]), but was probably just [[anon]], called [[BrokeNCYDE|the pigs]] and claimed to be a deaf person '''{{archive|6RW4L|being held hostage in a bathroom at DJ's address}}'''. The police were also told that DJ was wearing a [[Lolwut|razor blade necklace]] and was about to [[an hero]]. Being relatively [[virgin|unexposed]] to trolling, the police could not simply say [[lol internet]]. They dispatched a SWAT team and several police cars in order to save the hearing impaired from having to bathe in the Keem residence. DJ was out having a smoke when the cops arrived and [[lulz|held him at gunpoint]]. His wife and 1 year old daughter were next out of the house, and it was around this time that DJ realized that he was being [[trolled]]. His response was the same as always: [[X Y is X|make a YouTube video]], display a massive case of [[victim complex]], and tell the internet that [[Jessi Slaughter|YA DUN GOOF'D]].

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemswat|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>3jpWgJMTyvo</youtube>
;Notice the [[censored|disguised]] ED article?
|<youtube>0qt6kAUbP0w</youtube>
;What? 25-30 Police Cars you say?}}
|}}
}}

===The cancer comes back===

January 18, 2011, after three months of hiatus and making extremely shitty videos they called "[[cp|classics]]", F@G declared they were coming back. This of course meant that DJ Keemstar and [[dildos|company]] would make more videos of yelling at [[13 year old boys]] and stroking their [[e-peen]]. They were still terribly [[unfunny]] unless you were prepubescent. In their debut video, DJ pulled out one of his [[dicks|dumb ass personalities]], DJ Redneck. He tried really hard to troll a kid but he, once again, makes himself look stupid as hell. The kid didn't even rage. He also [[tl;dr|forgets]] [[Fail|David beat Goliath]].

{{Quote|[[newfag|I got through Chris Hansen, I got through Chris Hansen, what bitch...]]|DJ Keemstar confirming he is a [[pedo]]}}

=== MinecraftStars ===
Minecraftstars was a [[Nerds|Minecraft "community"]] for his fans. DJ being DJ tried to use it for [[Bandwagon|making money]]. Fans had to pay 100$ to get on a server which was run by [[Morons|two]] people known as Dylan and Brien. However, This idea crashed in a sea of piss after 2 months when Dylan went batshit crazy and replaced the website and DJ's forums with his landlord's Facebook and DJ's real address over how DJ treats his "[[Niggers|slaves]]". DJ claimed that Dylan stole $7,000 from him which was proven false when DJ bought a brand new flat screen TV and shitty DJ set [[Sarcasm|by sheer coincidence]].

{{Quote|Minecraftstars money and Server was stolen by Brien Groska 2139532682| Big [[faggot]] asking for help from his slave }}
After the whole deal with Dylan, Brien came out as a troll and changed the password to the YouTube channel and HIS [[shit|PayPal]]
{{clear}}

===The END to his Youtube or faggotry===
<center>[[Image:Djbannedonceagainyt.png|center]]</center>
On September 1st, 2011 The main channel "Haloaholes" was shut down after Google caught on that he was selling partnership to people. This upset Google because it's illegal and against their terms of service, but we all know [[DJ KEEMSTAR#DJ Vs. XBL-Enforcement Team|how DJ feels about terms of service]]. DJ claims that the 50 dollars for the partnership was a "deposit" to make sure that no one would upload pr0nz and get his account suspended. Either way Google did the internet a great service in killing some of the cancer.
*{{yt|haloaholes}} - Banned.
*{{yt|KEEM5TAR}} - Banned.
*{{yt|flagmyvids}} - Banned.
*{{yt|thekeemstarnetwork}} - Banned.
*{{yt|HappyGriefday}} - Banned.
*{{yt|FAGreborn|F@G Channel}} - Banned.

Now, being the over-dramatic tard that DJ is, he had to make a self-promotion video about his channel's shutdown.

The only people who follow him now are 12 year olds with nothing else to do in their day. [[Lulz|Oh wait, they already were.]] He also has a lonely ass {{yt|blogKEEMSTAR|blog channel}} where he satisfies his continuous urge to have buttsex with his [[Newfags|trolls]] and [[You|anyone else on his channel]], being the natural [[attention whore]] that he is. Did I mention that he loves [[Ron Paul]]?

==LiveaRoo hacked==

[[File:Livearoo.png|150px|thumb|right|LiveaRoo Hacked - March 17th, 2012]]

On March 16th, 2012, [[faggot|DJ KEEMSTAR]] declared war on Team Avolition via [[Twitter]] for unknown reasons. After several [[Twitter|messages]] were exchanged between the two, DJ KEEMSTAR refused to admit Team Avolition's worthiness of ice cream on a [[Skype]] call. His website, '''{{archive|jEgW7|livearoo.com}}''', was defaced [[internet_tough_guy|less than an hour]] after the call ended.

The contents of his [[shit|website]] were replaced with an image of the Twitter message that started the [[cat_fight|confrontation]] and a video taunting DJ KEEMSTAR. At the time of this writing, his reaction to the incident is unknown because he has not answered any [[prank call|phone calls]]. In all likelihood, he will become [[an hero]]. Nope He's still being the greedy [[attention whore]] he's known for being

===DJ vs. [[LifeInATent]]===
[[Last Thursday]], DJ ultimately decided it would be a [[Batshit Insane|great]] [[retarded|idea]] to [[hypocrisy|call out]] fellow attention whore, [[MeganSpeaks]] (LIATs well known Spawn/[[Truth|Girlfriend]]). Since another man talked with his [[cumdumpster|wimminz]], rallied his YouTube robot army and '''[[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|B& ALL OF HIS ACCOUNTS INTO OBLIVION]] [[EPIC WIN|JUST AS HIS NEW CO-HOST MOVED IN]]'''

LIAT, for the first and only time in his life, was the hero. He had left DJ without YouTubes yet again.

DJ, soon after getting his just deserts, called his [[personal army]] to shut down LIATs twitter. Just like most recent 4chan raids, it was [[Shit|disorganized]]. [[fail|They tried doxing him using typical doxing methods did not do proper fact checking]]. Feeling sad and depressed at the lack of means to whore himself, it became a daily routine for DJ to show up on Google Hangouts late at night, drunk and high beyond comprehension, like all good parents. It is likely the only thing keeping Keem in our realm are his undying fanboys, Mia, and his mentally lacking [[Futurama|Hispanic Robot]]. He will soon likely end up becoming [[an hero]].

====DJ vs. [[FuturisticHub]]====
Same shit, different name. Except this time he copies DJ KEEMSTAR's work as DramaHub. And later after LIAT & Marko lost a lawsuit of $20 MILLION DOLLARS, he made a DramaAlert video of him losing the lawsuit. You could say that [[Asking for it|justice is finally served]].

{{frame|<youtube>Vbk7NzX3DG8</youtube>|margin=auto}}

==Rust==
Come August 2013, Keemstar had yet again surfaced on another {{yt|KillerKEEMSTAR|miserable account}} (even trying to '''{{archive|c8roU|create a game}}''') so that he could gather more [[money]]; eventually just recording footage of a new game called Rust. Keemstar got attacked by a group of people and killed in the game; culminating in '''{{archive|OxL0f|a huge callout}}''' on his faggotry ('''including him having been proved to [[script kiddie|hack the game]]'''). He spent time in this period ranting on his {{twitter|KEEMSTARx|50th Twitter account}} where he has been shown '''{{archive|HTcj1|liking his own videos}}''' to feed his [[ego]]. In an even more miserable attempt to keep his [[asshole|ego]] in check, he [https://vimeo.com/72325964 posted and abruptly removed this video] shortly before pursuing [[child abuse|other endeavours]].

On 1/9/14, Keem finally got free VACation by Valve and '''{{archive|764AK|went on twitter}}''' to complain to [[nerd|Garry Newman]]. His fans invaded the official forums to protest his ban because their dear leader could do no wrong.

== DramaAlert and FaZe ==
After getting tired of Rust, BadKidsPodcast, and getting banned on most servers for trying to annoy children, Keemstar started up a new way to express his ego in the best way possible: trying to be a journalist. He started up a new channel under the name of DramaAlert with the help of a "fan" to prevent Google from banning it. Of course, Keem spiced his "news" up to make himself great in every way possible and most of the time, he was involved in his own "drama".

== [[iDubbbzTV]] roasts Keemstar ==

On May 5th, 2016, cancer survivor, and dildo unboxer, [[iDubbbzTV]], made a video. However, the only dildo and/or cancer featured in this video was our good friend, the Keem. In said video, iDubbbz exposes Keemstar's true identity as a garden gnome with a stupid beanie, and roasts the slimy manipulative cunt for his long history of hypocrisy. Watch the utter destruction here: {{frame|<youtube>-o3TfHjj_e4</youtube>|margin=auto}}
In a desperate attempt to save face, Keem immediately took to Twitter. Knowing there was nothing he could say to make himself appear less loathsome, the gnome did his best to play the video off as a joke.
<center>[https://twitter.com/KEEMSTAR/status/728321838493925376]</center>

Keem called it quits (again) shortly after this. iDubbbz's comeback? [[Epic win|A fucking music video parodying; "Smash Mouth - All Star"]]:

{{frame|<youtube>qP78Bu__npY</youtube>|margin=auto}}

==#RIP DRAMAALERT==

=== JoeySalads' Investigation ===

{{center|
{{frame|
{{videoframe|keemvids|font-weight: bold;|
|<youtube>7uREs5GKCdM</youtube>
;[[Pyrocynical]] was the first to upload a large-scale "exposed" video, going over many topics involving Keemstar and what he's done to [[TF2|Pyro]].
|<youtube>G2SRA4JL5dA</youtube>
;[[GradeAUnderA]] also covers topics involving Keemstar and his actions, despite claiming a while ago that he "doesn't give a fuck what Keemstar has done to people", srsly.
|<youtube>sGxPoemkKwE</youtube>
;And of course [[LeafyIsHere]] decided to join the party.
|<youtube>QXz-T5dqbEQ</youtube>
;JoeySalads did an investigation on Keemstar, finding very sketchy information about him. Allegedly, Keemstar asked a minor to show him a video of her nude, covering her genitals with paper that read "<3 Keemstar". Apparently Keemstar also harassed an 18 year old girl on stream, and harassed an autistic man to the point at which he was considering suicide. He also claimed to be in talks with the people at YouNow, trying to actually get an archive of DJ Keemstar's old streams.}}
|}}
}}

==His family==
===Mia aka Future Whore in ===
This is his pride and joy who he swears on every time he makes a to-be-broken promise. She will be a whore just like his girlfriend, Melissa. Just wait until she turns 13. She will turn out to be like Bish from battlecam: fucking everyone she can just for drugs because her dad spends his time shit talking instead of parenting her.

It's quite clear that Keem has all the intent of raising her to be a crack-whore. He often brings her into the arguments like a ''FATHER OF THE YEAR'' would do; usually blaming someone else for it and threatening to murder them for it.

{{Quote|[[idiot|I SWEAR ON MY DAUGHTER'S LIFE I'M NOT LYING TO YOU GUYS!]]|DJ Keemstar and his genius Parenting skills at work.}}

===Melissa ===
His girlfriend, Melissa, is a stupid blonde bitch who works for some crackhead cleaning company who has been with him for +5 years. She constantly goes out drinking with other men and woman with no mention of him on her Facebook. With photos to boot. Keem has often used her as a punching bag while drunk or high.

{{Quote|[[whore|I'VE BEEN WITH THIS ASSHOLE FOR 5 YEARS, PUTTING UP WITH HIS SHIT AND HE CHEATS WITH SOME GIRL ON MY BIRTHDAY. I WANTED TO GO OUT FOR A DRINK WITH UseMeBlade]]|Straight from the whore herself.}}

==His gamertags==

*DJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR DJ - Banned.
*xDJ KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR 911 - Banned.
*SPARKLES RAP - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*LOVE me Stepto - Banned.
*GAY RIGHTS Ftw - Banned.
*PUNT a KITTY - Banned. (username not allowed)
*FEDERATION4LIFE - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR 4ev - Banned.
*Heart Keemstar - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR vs U - Banned.
*Keemstar Legend - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR FTW - Banned.
*x keemstar x - Banned.
*CJ DIPPA
*Try Hard Team
*ButtholeLicker9971
*Red Dead Gay
*ProTrashTalker
*pants on the gr
*AZiggy15
*Pit Stain99
*THE HAPPY ROBOT
*K22 Lives
*LORD KEEMSTA - Banned.
*KEEMSTAR 15BANS - Banned.
*King KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*DJ KEEMSTAR yes - Banned.
*iKEEMSTAR - Banned.
*X manger - Banned.
*KILL KEEMSTAR - Banned.
*'''YES HELP''' - Current gamertag.

== F@G Gallery ==

<center>
{{cg|Gallery of F@ggotry|DJ KEEMSTAR|center|<gallery widths="200px" heights="90px" perrow="3">
Image:Keemstarguido.jpg|[[Guido|DJ Keemstar "Himself"]]
Image:Sexy times.jpg|[[Redneck|Deranker]] pulling an all nighter at the [[Basement|office.]]
Image:Bitchesstilldontknow.jpeg
</gallery>|<gallery widths="200px" heights="90px" perrow="3">
Image:Keemstarmod.jpg|[[trolling|Trolling one of DJs Moderators]]
Image:DJKarma.jpg|[[WIN|Karma sucks]]
File:DJ_keemstar100.png| [[Fact|DJ Is A Pedophile]]
File:DJandGuidelines.png| Speaks for itself this one!
File:Keemstar Arson.jpg| [http://fultonhistory.com/Newspaper%2018/Cuba%20NY%20Patriot/Cuba%20NY%20Patroit%202006/Cuba%20NY%20Patroit%202006%20-%200338.pdf He was once charged with arson.]
</gallery>}}
</center>
{{clear}}

== See Also ==
*[[Banned]]
*[[Bipolar Disorder]]
*[[Drama]] - What Keem is known best for.
*[[Guido]]
*[[LeafyIsHere]]
*[[LifeInATent]]
*[[Misha Silenosti]]
*[[No life]]
*[[Pedophile]]
*[[R@ygold]]
*[[SuperMarioLogan]] - Another YouTuber who got into some minor drama with Keem over shit. Actually had his wife whiteknight his ass.
*[[Twitter]]
*[[Unwarranted Self Importance]]
*[[Xbox Live]]
*[[YouTube]]
*[[YoutubeWakeUp]] - Keemstar wants to keep pedophiles on Youtube.

==External Links==

*{{wayback|https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/User:Danielkeem5|20170526082049|title=His ED account when he tried blanking Leafy's article}}
*'''{{twitter|keemstar|Current Twitter (watch this one get banned too)}}'''
*{{yt|KEEMSTAR22| Inactive for 7 years}}
*<s>{{yt|c|UCIvq0WtgCZqaeQnOnEwSE8A|Newest upcoming channel. Prepare your anus}}</s> [[BALEETED]]! {{wayback|https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCIvq0WtgCZqaeQnOnEwSE8A|20170813214022|title=(Archived)}}
*{{yt|NewDramaAlert|I give this one a month at most.}}
*{{yt|MinecraftStars|Inactive - His failed minecraft community channel}}
*[https://www.battlecam.com/djkeemstar Battlecam.com Channel]
*<s>[http://www.myspace.com/fourthofjuly2006/photos Old Myspace Gallery]</s> gone
*{{wayback|http://steptoanddj.webs.com/keemstar.htm|20120421235721|title=Proof of DJ's lack of understanding}}

===Email addresses===
Feel free to go spam the shit out of these:
*[mailto:gamebattlesprodigy@hotmail.com gamebattlesprodigy@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:djkeemstar@yahoo.com djkeemstar@yahoo.com]
*[mailto:flagmyvids@gmail.com flagmyvids@gmail.com]
*[mailto:djkeemstarlive@hotmail.com djkeemstarlive@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:keemer23@yahoo.com keemer23@yahoo.com]
*[mailto:keemer23@hotmail.com keemer23@hotmail.com]
*[mailto:killerkeemstar@gmail.com killerkeemstar@gmail.com]
*[mailto:sam.crispy123@gmail.com sam.crispy123@gmail.com]
*[mailto:DramaAlertBiz@gmail.com DramaAlertBiz@gmail.com]
*[mailto:NewDramaAlert@gmail.com NewDramaAlert@gmail.com]

{{Gaming}}
{{trolls}}
{{ytseries}}
{{Dying alone}}
{{Timeline|Featured Article October 12, [[2010]]|[[MicahFennec]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Online Roleplaying]]}}
{{timeline|Featured Article May 6 & May 7, [[2016]]|[[Abu Hajaar]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[San Francisco]]}}

[[Category:People]]
[[Category:YouTube]]

Personality rights

2025-06-08T18:30:08Z

Yooco: Added timestamps. What an embarrassing inconsistency for a propaganda movie.

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud.|cheating women]] and [[#"Personality_rights"_protect_bad_actors.|misbehaving teachers and other authority figures]] from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent [[#Personality_rights_destroy_history.|the preservation of historical events]]. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors. ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud. ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 short propaganda film, German, 4 minutes)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In another heavily emotionalized state-sponsored propaganda movie from 2022 titled „Und ihr schaut zu“ ("And you watch"), a mother whose daughter died after being hit by a car gets angry at a businessman pedestrian for having obstructed rescue workers. He obstructed rescue workers without using a camera, and his intention was to [[#Personality_rights_misplace_blame.|get to work]], not to watch, much less film the crash site. The mother was not present at the accident site, but the scene was filmed and published online by "gawkers" and "sensationalists", after which the mother begged for the videos to be deleted.<ref>At 31:45 in the movie: „Ich möchte dass ihr das löscht!“ ("I want you to delete it!")</ref> Ironically, the way she learned in the first place that the obstruction took place was through videos recorded by the "gawkers" she hated so much - the same videos she so desperately wanted gone ended up supporting her case.<ref>At 37:53 in the movie: „Sie sind auf den Videos!“ ("You're on the videos!")</ref> To maximize the sympathy points, a young woman was chosen for the role of the crash victim in the movie. This way, the movie takes advantage of the gender sympathy gap.<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt23313300/ Und ihr schaut zu (TV Movie 2022) - IMDb], [https://www.themoviedb.org/movie/978335-und-ihr-schaut-zu/ Und ihr schaut zu (2022) — The Movie Database (TMDB)]</ref><ref>[https://www.3sat.de/film/fernsehfilm/und-ihr-schaut-zu-104.html Und ihr schaut zu - 3sat-Mediathek] (2022 propaganda movie, German, 1 hour and 28 minutes)</ref>

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press. ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights misplace blame. ==
Video recordings of public disasters are effective at proving that, for example, one did not arrive too late at a place (such as work) as a result of ones own laziness, but due to incidents outside ones control. The lack of a video recording makes it appear as an excuse without proof.

== Personality rights destroy history. ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Personality rights

2025-06-08T18:18:09Z

Yooco: closing brackets, linked section, wording

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud.|cheating women]] and [[#"Personality_rights"_protect_bad_actors.|misbehaving teachers and other authority figures]] from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent [[#Personality_rights_destroy_history.|the preservation of historical events]]. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors. ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud. ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 short propaganda film, German, 4 minutes)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In another heavily emotionalized state-sponsored propaganda movie from 2022 titled „Und ihr schaut zu“ ("And you watch"), a mother whose daughter died after being hit by a car gets angry at a businessman pedestrian for having obstructed rescue workers. He obstructed rescue workers without using a camera, and his intention was to [[#Personality_rights_misplace_blame.|get to work]], not to watch, much less film the crash site. The mother was not present at the accident site, but the scene was filmed and published online by "gawkers" and "sensationalists", after which the mother begged for the videos to be deleted. Ironically, the way she learned in the first place that the obstruction took place was through videos recorded by the "gawkers" she hated so much - the same videos she so desperately wanted gone ended up supporting her case. To maximize the sympathy points, a young woman was chosen for the role of the crash victim in the movie. This way, the movie takes advantage of the gender sympathy gap.<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt23313300/ Und ihr schaut zu (TV Movie 2022) - IMDb], [https://www.themoviedb.org/movie/978335-und-ihr-schaut-zu/ Und ihr schaut zu (2022) — The Movie Database (TMDB)]</ref><ref>[https://www.3sat.de/film/fernsehfilm/und-ihr-schaut-zu-104.html Und ihr schaut zu - 3sat-Mediathek] (2022 propaganda movie, German, 1 hour and 28 minutes)</ref>

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press. ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights misplace blame. ==
Video recordings of public disasters are effective at proving that, for example, one did not arrive too late at a place (such as work) as a result of ones own laziness, but due to incidents outside ones control. The lack of a video recording makes it appear as an excuse without proof.

== Personality rights destroy history. ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Personality rights

2025-06-08T18:11:19Z

Yooco: consistent formatting

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud.|cheating women]] and [[#"Personality_rights"_protect_bad_actors.|misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent [[#Personality_rights_destroy_history.|the preservation of historical events]]. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors. ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud. ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 short propaganda film, German, 4 minutes)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In another heavily emotionalized state-sponsored propaganda movie from 2022 titled „Und ihr schaut zu“ ("And you watch"), a mother whose daughter died after being hit by a car gets angry at a businessman pedestrian for having obstructed rescue workers. He obstructed rescue workers without using a camera, and his intention was to get to work, not to watch or film the crash site. The mother was not present at the accident site, but the scene was filmed and published online by "gawkers" and "sensationalists", after which the mother begged for the videos to be deleted. Ironically, the way she learned in the first place that the obstruction took place was through videos recorded by the "gawkers" she hated so much - the same videos she so desperately wanted gone ended up supporting her case. To maximize the sympathy points, a young woman was chosen for the role of the crash victim in the movie. This way, the movie takes advantage of the gender sympathy gap.<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt23313300/ Und ihr schaut zu (TV Movie 2022) - IMDb], [https://www.themoviedb.org/movie/978335-und-ihr-schaut-zu/ Und ihr schaut zu (2022) — The Movie Database (TMDB)]</ref><ref>[https://www.3sat.de/film/fernsehfilm/und-ihr-schaut-zu-104.html Und ihr schaut zu - 3sat-Mediathek] (2022 propaganda movie, German, 1 hour and 28 minutes)</ref>

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press. ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights misplace blame. ==
Video recordings of public disasters are effective at proving that, for example, one did not arrive too late at a place (such as work) as a result of ones own laziness, but due to incidents outside ones control. The lack of a video recording makes it appear as an excuse without proof.

== Personality rights destroy history. ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Personality rights

2025-06-08T17:57:37Z

Yooco: …and they dropped another propaganda movie.

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud|cheating women]] and misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent [[#Personality_rights_destroy_history|the preservation of historical events]]. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 propaganda movie)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In another heavily emotionalized state-sponsored propaganda movie from 2022 titled „Und ihr schaut zu“ ("And you watch"), a mother whose daughter died after being hit by a car gets angry at a businessman pedestrian for having obstructed rescue workers. He obstructed rescue workers without using a camera, and his intention was to get to work, not to watch or film the crash site. The mother was not present at the accident site, but the scene was filmed and published online by "gawkers" and "sensationalists", after which the mother begged for the videos to be deleted. Ironically, the way she learned in the first place that the obstruction took place was through videos recorded by the "gawkers" she hated so much - the same videos she so desperately wanted gone ended up supporting her case. To maximize the sympathy points, a young woman was chosen for the role of the crash victim in the movie. This way, the movie takes advantage of the gender sympathy gap.<ref>[https://www.imdb.com/title/tt23313300/ Und ihr schaut zu (TV Movie 2022) - IMDb], [https://www.themoviedb.org/movie/978335-und-ihr-schaut-zu/ Und ihr schaut zu (2022) — The Movie Database (TMDB)]</ref><ref>[https://www.3sat.de/film/fernsehfilm/und-ihr-schaut-zu-104.html Und ihr schaut zu - 3sat-Mediathek] (German, duration: 1 hour, 28 minutes)</ref>

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights destroy history ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== Personality rights misplace blame ==
Video recordings of public disasters are effective at proving that, for example, one did not arrive too late at a place (such as work) as a result of ones own laziness, but due to incidents outside ones control. The lack of a video recording makes it appear as an excuse without proof.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Sustainability

2025-06-03T11:49:38Z

Yooco: rephrased

'''Sustainability''' is a euphemistic cover word for corporate greed, used by gigacorporations to signal the false impression that they are struggling to survive when they are <s>swimming</s> diving in money. It was used as an excuse to implement [[Digital Rape Mechanism]].<ref name=WebEnvironmentIntegrityAPI>[https://ghostarchive.org/varchive/0i0Ho-x7s_U Google's trying to DRM the internet, and we have to make sure they fail (at 2:28)]</ref>

== Quotes ==
{{quote| This trust is the backbone of the open Internet. Critical for the safety of user data and the sustainability of the website's business. | [http://archive.today/2023.08.18-183350/https://github.com/RupertBenWiser/Web-Environment-Integrity/blob/main/explainer.md Google (Web Environment Integrity API, also known as DRM for the web)]<ref name=WebEnvironmentIntegrityAPI /> }}

== References ==
<references />
{{Language}}
{{money}}

Sustainability

2025-06-03T11:48:15Z

Yooco: Why swim in money when you can dive in money?

'''Sustainability''' is a euphemistic cover word for corporate greed. It was used as an excuse to implement [[Digital Rape Mechanism]]. It is used by gigacorporations to signal the false impression that they are struggling to survive when they are <s>swimming</s> diving in money.<ref name=WebEnvironmentIntegrityAPI>[https://ghostarchive.org/varchive/0i0Ho-x7s_U Google's trying to DRM the internet, and we have to make sure they fail (at 2:28)]</ref>

== Quotes ==
{{quote| This trust is the backbone of the open Internet. Critical for the safety of user data and the sustainability of the website's business. | [http://archive.today/2023.08.18-183350/https://github.com/RupertBenWiser/Web-Environment-Integrity/blob/main/explainer.md Google (Web Environment Integrity API, also known as DRM for the web)]<ref name=WebEnvironmentIntegrityAPI /> }}

== References ==
<references />
{{Language}}
{{money}}

Google Chrome

2025-06-03T11:37:57Z

Yooco: How the french pronounce it.

<div style="text-align:center; background: #F8F8F8; border: 1px solid #DDDDDD; padding: 5px; margin: 1em;" class="notice metadata" id="spoilers">This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example, '''HOLY SHIT YOU CAN'T TURN OFF PULL-TO-REFRESH ON CHROME MOBILE ANYMORE! ENJOY LOSING YOUR INPUT TO ACCIDENTAL REFRESHES!!!1''' [[File:Trollface.gif|alt=Google shows the trollface.]]</div>
[[image:Chromestupidity2.jpg|300px|right]]

'''[[Google]] Chrome''', also known as '''[[Skynet]] Browser''', '''Pull-to-refresh Browser'''<ref>[https://www.gnu.org/proprietary/malware-google.html Google's Software Is Malware - GNU Project - Free Software Foundation] - ''In 2019, Google revoked users' ability to turn off the “pull-to-refresh” gesture in Chrome for Android. Despite thousands of protests by frustrated users, Google has not reverted its decision. Proprietary software developers are known for ignoring users' requests in favor of their own gain and convenience. […]''</ref>, '''Google Quoum''', '''Google Shrome''', and '''Google Jérôme''', is one of the most lurid and shittiest [[web]] [[browser]]s known to man.

It appeared [[last Thursday]] when a very funny [[webcomic]] was leaked. [[4chan]]'s /g/ and [[Something Awful]]'s SH/SC orgasmed at the release of Chrome and dubbed it the "[[Windows]] killer". Luckily Google is an advertising company so the browser will keep all of your personal data, such as what websites you visit, safe. Wink wink. Since the last [[100]] years Google never made a stable browser and every single fucking day they release a beta version full with more and more bugs. Let's say you got 7 computers in your home which every computer has 4 systems. And [[Google]] releases another beta version full with popups and bugs. For fucks sake, are you gonna install every singe beta daily on all of your computers ????

==Features==
[[File:GoogleMalware.png|thumb|Google Chrome thinks that Google.com is [[virus|malware]], and they are correct!]]
===Multithreading===
The main feature of the browser is that it starts a new process for each tab opened to save internet spaces. This extends to advertisements, where all advertisements on a tab are opened in a new tab and the one you were viewing is closed. This is so you can view the advertisements with maximum pleasure and without being distracted by all that content on /b/.
* The browser incorporates many unique privacy elements such as direct transfer of your private data to the government for protection. Chrome has proven itself so fast that [[Comcast]] is now throttling the speeds of Chrome and Windows Anti Virus 2008 classifies it as a virus.
===Colorful Design And Theme Faggotry===
* Google powers it with copyright infringement; they made special [[Pokemon|Pokeballs]] to capture [[Shit nobody cares about|rare and valuable Pokemon like Metagross, whose brain is as powerful as four supercomputers]]. The Pokemon are used to power the browser as they slowly sap the life force from your computer.
* Chrome supports themes that won't fuck your browser up. 

[[File:Google chrome aw snap.jpg|center]]

=== Tab bar ===
While Google first had the ability to select multiple tabs and move them to a new window, Chrome lacks a side-scrollable tab bar that Firefox has. This means if you are a tab hoarder with hundreds of tabs, you can not scroll the tab bar sideways. Microsoft Edge, a Chrome derivative, solved this by giving an option to show a vertical tab bar, and Firefox can do this with the "[https://addons.mozilla.org/en-US/firefox/addon/vertigo-tabs/ vertigo tabs]" extension. (Yes, even Firefox 57 Quantum and up, after they got rid of XUL.)

===Safety===
* Even worse, when you run Chrome and browse [[ED]] under Windows, you don't get the [[Lie|helpful ]] Window/XP/WhateverDefender application installed under your machine's "Documents and Settings" folder and in your registry's "what to do with exe's" instructions that so enrich the Firefox and IE experiences.
* Chrome evaded the XSS attacks by [[Goatse Security]].
===Drag Drop===
It has some key differences from [[Firefox]], like being able to drag tabs into separate windows (which Firefox can now do and [[Opera]] could always do) and that's about it. However, because it is made by Google, everyone overlooks the complete irrelevance of this browser.
===Extensions===
Google has an app store which has thousands of extensions. Among thousands, only 10 of them are useful for you. Extensions help you not to see ads, get 1 year weather forecast, see your daily horoscope, be spammed by your recent emails, etc.
===Data Backup===
'Accidentally' delete your browsing history, search history, or simply just forgot about something you wrote 2 years ago? Don't worry, google has a copy saved. Thank you google!

Since 2014, Chrome auto-deletes any history older than 3 months, but Google still keeps your search history forever (even if you delete it from your Google account). This means Google wants to keep your history but they don't want you to keep your own history.<ref>[http://archive.today/2020.12.05-142004/http://web.archive.org/web/20141010125418/http://www.obsidianforensics.com/blog/archived-history-files-removed-from-chrome-v37/ Obsidian Forensics » Archived History files removed from Chrome v37] (September 4th, 2014)</ref>

=== Task manager ===
To its credit, Chrome had a browser task manager well before Mozilla introduced <code>about:performance</code>, <code>about:processes</code>, and <code>about:unloads</code> to [[Firefox]].

=== Manifest V3 ===
Given that Google is a for-profit advertisement business, it would prefer if people did not block advertisements. For this reason, they invented Manifest V3. To justify it, Google does what they can best and throw around claims of it "protecting" your security and privacy. But it still protects you less than disconnecting from the Internet does!

=== Web Environment Integrity API ===
…is perverted shit no one asked for that Google randomly pulled out of their asses some day because they felt like it. No one needed it until Google decided that yes, you do need it, by hyping it up and blowing it out of proportion.

Obviously, "integrity" here refers to the integrity of corporate profits.

Enjoyed having [[Digital Rape Mechanism]] on your DVDs and Blu-ray discs? Well, in the near future, it is also coming to the web!<ref>[https://ghostarchive.org/varchive/0i0Ho-x7s_U Google's trying to DRM the internet, and we have to make sure they fail] - Louis Rossmann</ref>

==Why you should switch==
*Because [[Firefox 3]] is complete shit. (especially sucks when draws a circle around the item you click on.)
*[[Open source]]
*Because [[nobody cares]] about [[goatse|rainbow blinkies]] anyway
*Omnibar
*Beta = [[Leet]] [[Hacker]]
*Help [[Google]] take over the world
[[File:Google chrome aw snap.jpg|center]]
*More [[advertising|ads]]
*Increases your ram speed by 1 gigabyte
*Who need's privacy?
*[[Xtreme|XTREME]] SPEEDS
*Resembles Pokeball
*It prevents teh [[Mudkip|mukdipz]] from taking over your browser:
*Incognito Mode [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|DELETES]] YOUR [[IP address|IP ADDRESS]] and lets you look at pr0n without [[you|your]] mom finding out:
*Google needs more computers to perfect Skynet.

==Gallery==
{{Collapsegallery||Gallery|center|<gallery perrow="5">
File:Chrome Transformer.gif
File:Chromecartoon.jpg
Image:googlechromeicon.jpg|Chrome, I choose you! [[Some argue]] that it is in fact the Metroid logo with Samus in her ball.
File:Firefox Chrome.jpg
Image:Forever-a-chrome.png|Once you go [[nigger|chrome]], you never go back.
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:SA chromecomic.png|It will make you [[E-penis|better. Stronger. Faster]].
Image:Chrome dicks.png|[[open source|open sores]].
Image:OH HELL NOmlp.png|Chrome [[My Little Pony|pony]] [[Fuck|fucking]] a human.
Image:chromeprocess.jpg|Chrome virus not to be confused with the web browser.
Image:Chromecomic.jpg|Proof of anon's love for Chrome.
Image:ChromeIncogHansen.png |Incognito mode is useless for CP
Image:chromeScorpion.png|Flawless victory
Image:ChromeIncognito.png
File:Chrome hates Linux.png|Google has a fetish against their preferred OS
</gallery>}}

==The Jewish Takeover, a [[moron|taxi driver]] writes==

Prior to [[9/11]] the [[Jews]] were conspiring to take over the internet in an operation known only as [[Web 2.0]]. It was devolved in early 2000 as a predecessor to [[Jewtube|YouTube]]. However Netscape navigator proved to be to much of an opponent and Chrome was canceled. Use extreme caution while using Chrome as it is believed to emit mind-controlling radio waves to make you buy flu shots.

== Fork ==
Some people didn't quite like the way Chrome's icon looked like. So they downloaded the source and painted the icon blue. Hence cometh [https://code.google.com/p/chromium/ Chromium].

== References ==
<references />

== See also ==

[[File:Google chrome aw snap.jpg|center]]
* [[IE|Explorer]]
* [[Firefox]]
* [[Opera]]
* [[SeaMonkey]]
* [[Safari]]
* [[Google Ultron]]

==External Links==
*http://www.google.com/chrome/
*[https://www.mozilla.org/sv-SE/firefox/new/ Which browser is the best?]

{{Softwarez}}
[[File:Google chrome aw snap.jpg|center]]
[[Category:Softwarez]]
[[Category:Fandom Stuff]]

Personality rights

2025-05-30T06:23:27Z

Yooco: section link

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud|cheating women]] and misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent [[#Personality_rights_destroy_history|the preservation of historical events]]. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 propaganda movie)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights destroy history ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Personality rights

2025-05-30T06:18:24Z

Yooco: including offline

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud|cheating women]] and misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent the preservation of historical events. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 propaganda movie)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights destroy history ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Gamaliel

2025-05-27T18:40:10Z

Yooco: traitor

[[File:Simpaliel.png|frameless|400px|center]]

[[File:Whiteknight.png|frameless|right ]]

Oh, the stinking, shit-and-fly encrusted lulz that Rob '''{{wpul|Gamaliel}}''' Fernandez (more like GamiLOL, Simpaliel, or GamiLEEL (not to be confused with [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCISlYih7eRlFz8iPkyyUwYw Galileel])) has brought us over the years. The pudgy little gummy-bear-swallowing prick, a loser from the University of South Florida, has been embedded in Wikipedia for so long that his genitals have turned to dust. He showed up in 2004 and started "gnome" work and removing vandalism. And started showing off his massive swollen ego.

'''Gamaliel''' is a [[feminist|male gender traitor]] who thinks with his penis, not his brain, making him easily manipulable by women. He is quite possibly among the greatest [[white knight]] [[simp]]s of Wikipedia. He steadily stepped in to defend his "wonderful" wimminz who "can't possibly be wrong", to earn good-boy points. "How dare you say something bad about my wonderwomen?", he thought whenever someone criticized the behaviour of something "as [[ugly|beautiful]] as a woman". Whenever someone loses a mean word about his princess, he cries [[hwaahsment]]. Of course, he did this hoping to bang his goddess [[Zoe Quinn|Zoe Quim]], or failing that, then at least his arbitrator colleagues Molly White or Emily Temple-Wood, but it never worked out.

{{squote|I wrote the book of love. Really.|[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:Gamaliel&oldid=2430787]}}
And few other Wikipedia admins can claim to have been dragged into an arbitration in 2004, before he was even made an admin. '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Requests_for_arbitration/Rex071404/Evidence#Attacks_on_Gamaliel|}}''' It was good for Rob, because he discovered he could shit on right-wing WP editors freely and the others would [[queef|protect]] him. Right from the '''{{wptl|Gamaliel/Archive_1|first archive}}''' of his talkpage, it was obvious that Rob was there to fuck with people.

*Lulzy: in 2005 he fought with various people over John F. Kennedy assassination conspiracies. He took the same line as debunker [https://www.prouty.org/mcadams/ John McAdams], despite McAdams' right-wing politics. Didn't matter, Rob wanted to destroy people. [https://www.kennedysandking.com/john-f-kennedy-articles/john-mcadams-and-the-siege-of-chicago-part-2] A LOT of enemies were made for Rob this way. Nothing drives Rob into a faggy frenzy like conspiracies, right-wing dicksnots like [[Michael Savage]], or talk about the Skull And Bones club.
*Lulzy: also in 2005, he supported shrieking ultra-cunt [[SlimVirgin]] and tinyfuck [[Chip Berlet]] in disputes over [[Lyndon LaRouche]], [http://proutypedia.com/wiki/Wikipedia Fletcher Prouty] '''{{archive|iSSWY}}''', and various other people Fatty Buttplug Berlet didn't like. You can thank/blame Rob for some of the bullshit Wikipedia did to [[Daniel Brandt]] over the years, since Berlet has special venom for Brandt.
*Lulzy: despite being a law-and-order liberal science nerd, Gamaliel is the primary supporter of Wikipedia editor/'''{{blog|goethean|crackpot}}''' Scott '''{{wpul|Goethean}}''' Zimmerle in a long list of disputes. Zimmerle is obsessed, hell he's ''in love'', with one of the most pathetically lame American "mystics" of all time, whiny old hippie '''{{wikilink|Ken_Wilber|Ken Wilber}}'''. Insert anything of a negative nature into a Wilber-related article, and Goethean will instantly revert it, followed by Gamaliel blocking your account and disabling your ability to complain. No matter how well-sourced your information is, it is NOT ALLOWED to point out the weaknesses of Ken Wilber on Wikipedia. Nice to have a slave clitoris on your side, isn't it Scott? Give it a kiss.
*Lulzy: Rob got into the Gamergate bullshit and fought with people right and left. '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2015-03-11/In_the_media#Gamergate.3B_a_Wiki_hoax.3B_Kanye_West|}}'''[https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?oldid=718046996#Arbitration_motion_restricting_Gamaliel]'''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Arbitration/Requests/Case/GamerGate|}}''' Since he'd managed to get himself assigned to run the '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:General_sanctions/Gamergate|"general sanctions"}}''' page for the GG arbitration, this gave him a chance to shit on people he'd been fighting with. (GamalielGate?)
*EXTREME Lulzy: Rob '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Arbitration_Committee_Elections_December_2013/Candidates/Gamaliel/Statement|ran for Arbcom}}''' in 2013, and lost by just a hair. Because people don't like him. He ran again in 2015 and '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Arbitration_Committee_Elections_December_2015#Results|won by a hair}}'''. And a few months later he was pulled into one of the '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Arbitration/Requests/Case/Gamaliel_and_others|ugliest arbitrations in history}}'''. Surrendered his arbitrator seat and other powerz. He had already disappeared on 14 April 2016 after fighting with a lot of people over stupid shit. Lol to the nth power.
*Extra lulz: when a Wikipedia article was created about ED's [[Muhammad Sex Simulator 2015]] game, it was quickly put up for deletion. Rob showed up and said:
{{squote|"Keep due to news coverage and inherent situational hilarity. Gamaliel (talk) 23:58, 16 February 2015 (UTC)" }}
*He contacted the employer of Wikipedia critic David Auerbach trying to get him fired. At the same time he is quick to cry ''[[Wambulance|hawaaaahssment]]'' when he or one of his wonderwimminz he simps for is called out.<ref>[http://archive.today/2016.07.05-220337/http://www.breitbart.com/tech/2016/07/05/wikipedias-seven-worst-moments/ Wikipedia's Seven Worst Moments - Breitbart (2016)]</ref>

*[[Last Thursday]], Gamaliel gave up his position as an arbitrator during a '''{{wikilink|Wikipedia:Arbitration/Requests/Case/Gamaliel_and_others|humiliating ArbCom case}}''' which focused on him, while he sat on the committee. In order to allow their colleague to save face, Gamaliel was allowed to retain his sysop bit if he stepped down from ArbCom and resigned his position with Wikimedia DC, a WMF "local chapter" for the DC area. The only problem is that he lied to Doug Weller about resigning from WMDC and still is listed as a board member despite living and working in Florida as a librarian.

Gamaliel also tries to destroy things that don't exist. From his user page:
<blockquote>
This user is here to destroy your patriarchy.
</blockquote>

Gamaliel [[beta male|enslaves himself for his wimminz]]. He thinks sex is just around the corner, but wimminz laugh at him while manipulating him through artificial scarcity. Gamaliel is like the donkey running after the carrot attached to a stick.

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:People|Fernandez, Rob]]
[[Category:Wikipedia]]
[[Category:Gamergate]]

2014

2025-05-27T17:51:59Z

Yooco: Add Rodger to that wild year.

{{time}}
[[Image:Ed {{PAGENAME}} year collage.png|thumb|All about {{PAGENAME}}.]]

'''{{PAGENAME}}''', another year in drama. Sony gets hacked, ED goes down for over a month, ISIS happens, [[Gamergate]] and [[The Fappening]] occurred almost at the same time, [[Malaysia|Malaysian planes fell out of the sky]], [[Elliot Rodger]] became [[an hero]], and the lulz almost dies with the near deaths of DOXBIN and TPB, plus the SJW infiltration of 4chan. What more could you ask for? Here's a look at its lulziest events through the cunning eyes of the [[dramacrat]].

Need a recap of what happened [[2013|last year]]? We've got you covered.

==Dramatica Events from {{PAGENAME}}==

[[image:Sue Basko Ad.jpg|135px|thumb|Attorney at lol.]]

===January===

*[[Sue Basko|Sue Basko's]] twitter campaign against ED and [[Doxbin]] goes into full force, after beginning in the last week of [[2013|December]].
*[[Schnookums|Belly rubs]] are in.

===February===

*[[Ragnarok]] happened, apparently.

[[File:Monica Punk All Sad.jpg|115px|thumb|left|Stop bullying me, BAWW.]]

===March===

*Welfare whale [[Monica Punk]] posts a video of herself calling the cops on people that are "bullying" her on the internet. She later finds herself the victim of prank calls and deceitful friendships reminiscent of the good ol' days of [[Chris-chan]].
[[image:Weev 2013.jpg|125px|thumb|right|FREEEEE.]]

===April===

[[Image:Elliot Mlady.jpg|130px|thumb|M'lady.]]

*[[Kimmy]], ("Aunt /b/") '''Queen of''' [[s4s/|'''<nowiki>[s4s]</nowiki>''']] visits the board on its birthday!!
*A kid tries [[Pennsylvania School Stabbing|shooting up his school with a knife]], failing to kill anyone (including himself).
*[[weev]] becomes a free man after his prison conviction gets vacated. He served 13 months of the 41 month sentence (he wasn't set to be released until [[Holy shit|January 2016]]).
*Aspiring attorney at lol, acquaintance of Sue Basko, and enemy of the lulz [[Joseph Camp]] gets sent back to jail after allegedly violating his post-supervised release.
*[[Windows|Windows XP]] joins the deathbed, ending its 12 years of life.

===May===

*ED and its forums go down for over a month. An alarming rate of lulz withdrawals occur worldwide.
*Virgin rage turns deadly when "Supreme Gentleman" [[Elliot Rodger]] goes on a killing spree, kills himself, and leaves behind a trail of desperate forum posts and manifestos. {{hashtag|YesAllWomen}} begins trending as a result.

===June===

[[image:Jason van dyke lulyer.jpeg|125px|thumb|Boy, ah tell you h'wut.]]
[[image:Kys a thug.png|135px|thumb|left|#OpShadowrapz.]]

*EDiots band together and donate all their lunch money, trust funds, welfare income, and stolen credit cards in order to bring ED back online. Now with less ads and lulzier than ever!
*After getting [[v&]] in April, Deric Lostutter proceeds to fame-fag his way into the media spotlight by confirming his identity as [[KYAnonymous]], the leader of the [[OpRollRedRoll]] Anonymous hive.
*Japan finally bans [[CP]].
*[[File:YouTube Favicon.png|link=http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4qyBZch9f8juGiVW-E6abQ]] [http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC4qyBZch9f8juGiVW-E6abQ '''LulzTalkRadio'''] airs its final episode.

===July===

[[image:Michael Brown of Ferguson, Missouri.jpg|thumb|125px|Trayvon Martin reincarnated and killed all over again.]]
[[file:Zoe_Quinn_Five.png|thumb|left|125px|Would you like fries with that?]]
[[image:Isis_beheading_james_foley_3.png|125px|thumb|Not the way to get ahead in life.]]
[[image:Vivian-james-dance.gif|thumb|left|125px|Vivian James is born.]]

*Some guy starts a [http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/324283889/potato-salad Kickstarter fund] to raise $10 to buy potato salad and ends up getting thousands of dollars in donations. It's currently reached $70,000, but then it [http://www.huffingtonpost.com/{{PAGENAME}}/07/10/potato-salad-kickstarter_n_5573913.html dropped to $44,000] the very next night. It closed with just under $55,500 pledged.
*Incompetent lawyer [http://r000t.com/texas-attorney-threatens-opponents-with-death/ Jason Lee Van Dyke] (no, not [[Sue Basko]] this time) sues [[Pink Meth]] for being a "revenge porn" site, and ignorantly includes [[ED:TOR|Tor]] in the lulsuit for hosting it. Hilarious exchanges are had with the gun-totin', truck-drivin' [[redneck|Texan]] on Facebook and Twitter, which he ended up deleting in a failed attempt to erase his actions. He later realizes half of his stupidity and drops the suit against Tor.
*The [[Jada|#Jadapose]] craze sweeps the nation after photos of a black girl's allegedly raped body are posted and subsequently mocked on the internet, sparking hashtags, trendy photos and dances, and butthurt feminism.
*[[Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17]] gets shot down out of the sky in Ukrainian airspace, raining corpses of AIDS researchers and [[dead babies]]. Pilot Parker is identified as the culprit by conspiracy theorists.

===August===

*18-year-old [[Nigger|Michael Brown]] is gunned down by white officer [[Hero|Darren Wilson]] after being caught on surveillance camera robbing a convenience store. The resulting chimpout declares it to be "[[Trayvon]] part 2," Anonymous fails with [[OpFerguson]] by incorrectly doxing the responsible cop before his name was outed, and a fundraiser which had been set up to help the brave officer relocate raises almost $200,000 in a mere 23 days.
*In an ironic twist of fate, the [[Ice Bucket Challenge]] manages to kill more people than the disease it's meant to save people from.
*US journalist [[James Foley]] becomes an international star after [[Anonymous]] supporting rapper L. Jinny beheads him live on video. A sequel starring Steven Sotloff followed shortly after.
*[[Robin Williams]] makes a bid for the [[Golden iPod]] by [[an hero|hanging himself]] at his home. His daughter quits the internet for good after trolls bombard her with [[shooped|fake]] pictures of her dead dad.
*[[Zoe Quinn]] fucks at least 5 different video game designers and journalists (some like Nathan Grayson from pro-feminist website [[Kotaku]]) in exchange for positive reviews on [[Depression Quest]], the shitty text-based game she created. [[Feminazi|Feminazis]] and [[Nods Respectfully Toward You|SJWs]] immediately [[cuck|rush]] to her aid, including [[Phil Fish]], who suffered such an intense online raping that he closed both his Twitter and gaming company down out of butthurt.
*[[4chan]] donates a buttload of cash to a women's charity for video games, earning them a character in one of the games. The ending result is [[Vivian James]]. Meanwhile, butthurt feminazi Patricia Hernandez uses a Twitter sock account to declare 4chan to be the "[[Cathedral of Misogyny]]" for supporting women's charities and donating to colon cancer to chemo butthurt. Reddit winds up earning a character down the road as well and churns out [[:file:Gilda Mars.png|Gilda Mars]], a [[original character|female version]] of the Reddit alien. Vivian-Gilda [[rule 34]] expected to follow.
*[[The Fappening]] is happening! Aka Celebgate {{PAGENAME}}, aka hundreds of nude and scantily-clad female celebrities steadily being leaked on [[AnonIB]] and [[4chan]]. Stand by for damage control.
*[[GamerGate]] blows up as a result of the [[Zoe Quinn]] controversy. In a pathetic attempt at damage control and derailment, the gaming media refuses to lend credence to the actual truth or accept responsibility for the exposed collusion and instead blames everything on [[gamers]]. [[Fact|No, srsly]].

[[file:goodluckebolachan.jpg|left|thumb|125px|Good luck!]]

===September===
[[File:Traf4.jpg|thumb|right|100px]]
*[[TJ Lane]] escapes from prison on [[9/11]], only to be caught 6 hours later in front of a farmhouse in the woods, armed with a fucking [[:file:tj lane pitchfork.jpg|pitchfork]]. He fails to add to his previous [[high score]] and peacefully returns to his life of anal penetration in the slammer.
*[[Leigh Alexander]] becomes e-famous as being the worst [[GamerGate]] critic ever. Fat, racist, alcoholic, *and* a man-hater? No, that's the [[lulz|best]]!
*[[4chan]] dies as a result of [[SJW]] takeover and [[moot]] [[M00t's GamerGate Sellout|caving in]] to their scary threats. [[8chan]] rises from its ashes.
*27 September: A sad day when Former Ohio Rep [[Jim Traficant]] dies when his tractor flips over on him. Was known for speaking the unpopular [[Truth]] such as [[JEWS DID WTC]]. 2 years later, 2016, Donald [[Trump]] would adopt his take no prisoners, politically incorrect style of politics and win the presidency.

[[image:lieghalexander.png|thumb|125px|Silly gamer boys ^_^]]

===October===

*ED loses its [[Daniel Brandt|'''.es''' domain]] and returns to '''.se''' within 5 days, quickly regaining all its lost traffic shortly after.
*[[Shahn Christian Andersen]] files [https://ia801402.us.archive.org/9/items/gov.uscourts.nyed.360902/gov.uscourts.nyed.360902.1.0.pdf a lolsuit] against several EDiots over a satirical article detailing his history of being a scummy criminal scammer.
*A massive [[DDOS]] attack strikes the world of [[furry art]], taking [[FurAffinity]] and SoFurry [[:file:Massive_furry_ddos_dragoneer_tweet.jpg|completely off the internet]], and temporarily knocking other anthro porn sites such as [[Inkbunny]] offline. [[Dragoneer]], the faggot responsible for FurAffinity, is named prime suspect after it was revealed that a fundraiser which had been set up after the attack to protect against future attacks [http://pbs.twimg.com/media/B0Ls25UIQAMNtX-.png:large had in fact been created hours *before*] the actual attack. [http://www.reddit.com/r/furry/comments/2jk5mv/breaking_furaffinity_fundraiser_page_created/clcj66p He responds] by claiming it was coincidental [[Bullshit|shitty timing.]] This happening 2 months after he set up another [http://www.gofundme.com/7paw6o GoFundMe drive] just so [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6048518/ he could buy himself] a new Cintiq tablet.
*[[Ebola-chan]] is summoned to take care of the overpopulation and world hunger problems in [[Africa]], and successfully begins thinning out their numbers at an alarming rate. In a dramatic twist, one [[nigger|man]] infected with the [[Ebola virus]] travels to the US, bringing the deadly disease with him as a final act of revenge against whitey before it claims his life.

===November===

*Some guy strangles his girlfriend to death and uploads [http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/file.php?40,file=162948,filename=1415164121753.jpg photos of her dead body] to [[4chan]].
*[[Doxbin]] joins [[Silk Road]] and other hidden [[Tor]] sites in being seized by the [[feds]].
*Darren Wilson, the officer who shot 18-year-old [[Michael Brown]] in Ferguson, MO, is found not guilty. A mass [[chimp out]] occurs nationwide, leaving rioting and looting to become the main topic of conversation during everyone's [[Thanksgiving]] dinner.
*Sony hacked AGAIN. Ruinage of Sony Pictures ensues, with leaks including employee SSNs, movies that weren't even released yet, and leaked racist emails between Sony employees. "[[North Korea|Guardians of Peace]]" takes responsibility.

===December===

*[[encyclopedia dramatica|ED]] turns [[ED10|10]]!
*[[TPB]] is [[The Great Torrent Raid|raided]] and temporarily taken offline, before returning as a countdown page, and a <s>AES</s> Bittorrent Sync key on the .se domain. Copycat sites like Isohunt's OldPirateBay, ThePairatebay.link, and thepiratebay.com.ua attempt to take its place.
*[[Sony]] Pictures freaks out after getting <nowiki>#</nowiki>REKT by North Korean super l33t hackers and cancels their film "The Interview." After being called out by everyone, their dog and even the President on their faggotry of caving to terrorists, Sony pulls a 180 and releases it online and in indie theaters on the same day as planned for release.
*[[Lizard Squad]] claims responsibility for trolling gamers by taking the PlayStation Network and XBOX Live offline for Christmas. Just in time for game console presents!
*[[Chris-Chan]] is sent back to jail for macing a [[GameStop]] employee over [[Sonic]]'s arms being colored blue in the new Sonic Blast game.

{{history}}
{{Timeline|Dramatic Years|[[2013]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[2015]]}}

[[Category:2014]]

Archive.org

2025-05-27T14:54:14Z

Yooco: Looks like the Archive doesn't like imitators!

{{Goodnews|The website is officially back!}}
{{morphquote|hackerquote||font-weight; bold
|Have you ever felt like the Internet Archive runs on sticks and is constantly on the verge of suffering a catastrophic security breach? It just happened. See 31 million of you on HIBP!|[[Hacker|Hacker in JavaScript alert]]
|It's dispiriting to see that even after being made aware of the breach 2 weeks ago, IA has still not done the due diligence of rotating many of the API keys that were exposed in their gitlab secrets. As demonstrated by this message, this includes a Zendesk token with perms to access 800K+ support tickets sent to info@archive.org since 2018. Whether you were trying to ask a general question or requesting the removal of your site from the Wayback Machine – your data is now in the hands of some random guy. If not me, it'd be someone else. Here's hoping that they'll get their shit together now.|[[Hacker|Hacker in IA's Zendesk token]]
|}}
[[File:holy greek temple of the Internet.png|thumb|200px|Welcome to the holy greek temple of the Internet! ]]
[[Image:Wayback.png|thumb|An excellent trolling resource.]]

'''Archive.org''' (formal name: '''Internet Archive''') is a [[site]] that tries to save the entire [[Internets]]. It allows people to look at saved versions of websites from years ago and comes greatly in handy when writing [[ED]] articles about sites that no longer exist, or digging up past lulz that is otherwise being removed from the Internets. When it's working, that is. The thing craps out a dozen times a week.

== The Wayback Machine ==

[[Image:Edold.png|thumb|ED main page from [[at least 100]] years ago. Doesn't it look n00bish?]]

When a [[re-re]] decides to delete their [[LiveJournal]] after the [[troll]]s descend and they just can't take it any more, the Wayback Machine allows us to [[Lulz|laugh at their stupidity for all eternity.]] Unfortunately it is possible for websites to request exclusion from the Wayback Machine's archives by putting the file robots.txt in your home directory. This prevents websites from getting robo-stalked (such is the case with [[MySpace]]) which tampers with [[E|Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED]] writers' trolling arsenals.

Apparently the name of the site is a reference to an episode of ''The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show''. While this reference to a shitty TV show that died before anyone can remember makes the website look like garbage; Do not be fooled, the site is in fact quite useful. Unless you're looking up a [[MySpace]]; In that case, use [[Archive.is]] - for Archive.is doesn't care about robots.txt.

Pages pulled up by Archive.org can be used as blackmail, as demonstrated by professional webcomics [[troll]] Scott Kurtz when he bitched about another web cartoonist re-publishing a [[blog]] post he wrote. Ironically, he has now apparently deleted that post, thus making the circle of [[lulz]] complete.

== Deleted from the archives ==
[[File:Wayback_error_parody.png|thumb|center]]

Unfortunately, Archive.org is not truly dedicated to [[ARCHIVE FUCKING EVERYTHING|archiving the entire web]]. Notably, [[KiwiFarms]] was [https://www.theverge.com/2022/9/7/23341051/kiwi-farms-internet-archive-backup-removal sorried into the ground] (excluded) after causing too much [[lulz]].

=== The Sorry List ===
<div style="column-width:16em;">
* [[LinkTree]]
* [[Quora]]
* [[Soyjak.party]] - more like Sorryak.party!
* [[KiwiFarms]] - more like SorryFarms!
* [[Doxbin]] - obvious candidate; it even rhymes with Sorry! *rapping* Sorry like it's Doxbin! Sorry like it's Doxbin!
* [[Brightkite]]
* [[CyberCiti]] - more like CyberSorry!
* [[TrueCrypt]] - most notable exclusion of 2014.
* [[Fucked Company]] - both fucked and sorried.
* [[Abload]] - probably because some idiots misused it.
* [[theCHIVE]] - looks like the Archive doesn't like imitators!
</div>

== Other services ==

Archive.org also has a huge archive of 1900-1989 [[snuff|B movies]]. When you see them, you'll [[shit bricks]]. Hundreds of [[Mujahideen Video]]s and [[An Hero]] Videos are also submitted every day to the archive, only a handful being deleted. Another reason to go to Archive.org is the massive population of [[shit|experimental musicians]].

== See Also ==

* [[Archive.is]]
* [[4chanarchive]]
* [[Googlecash]]
* [[Ghettoditto]]

== External Links ==

* [http://www.archive.org/index.php The Official Website]
** [http://web.archive.org/web/*/http:/www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Main_Page Archive.org's archive of EncyclopediaDramatica.com's main page from 2007 to 2011]
* [https://www.theregister.co.uk/2018/09/04/wayback_machine_legit/ WBM archived webpages are now court-admissible evidence!] {{archive|0D8kS|U MAD?}}

{{sites}}
{{serious}}
{{SecurityFaggots}}
{{Timeline|Featured article May 22, [[2011]]|[[The Rapture]]|archive.org|[[Jewish Internet Defense Force]]}}
{{Timeline|Featured article October 21 - 23, [[2024]]|[[The Rapture]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Halloween (franchise)]]}}

[[Category:Drama-generating techniques]]

Personality rights

2025-05-23T12:49:49Z

Yooco: + source

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud|cheating women]] and misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent the preservation of historical events. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0EHz3ZBzqo Groom Exposes Bride and Best man (movie scene)]</ref> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed online.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 propaganda movie)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights destroy history ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]

Personality rights

2025-05-23T12:36:47Z

Yooco: "Personality rights" enable paternity fraud.

'''Personality rights''' and '''image rights''' are censorship that prevents harmfully behaving people from being held accountable.

Like [[copyright]]s, "personality rights" and "image rights", also known as "rights to ones own image" and "rights to ones own likeness", are worded as "rights" that make them seem beneficial to the individual. In reality, they take away much more than they give.<ref>[https://www.tastyfish.cz/lrs/rights_culture.html LRS Wiki: rights_culture] - <q>Abuse of rights culture can now be seen clear as day especially with a very common pattern of the word "right" actually meaning "restriction", i.e. its exact opposite, being used as an euphemism -- for example so called "copyRIGHT" does not stand for giving anyone any extra rights at all! It stands for TAKING AWAY the naturally present "right" to freely use, study, modify and share information. Whereas without copy"right" anyone was free to share information, copyright established that this will now be forbidden. Similarly the "right to be forgotten" means that other people will now be FORBIDDEN from talking about someone else.</q></ref> For example, they prevent [[#Personality_rights_enable_paternity_fraud|cheating women]] and misbehaving teachers and other authority figures from being exposed.

Video cameras are among the most effective tools for exposing corruption. This is why their use had to be restricted by law and people had to be [[#How_the_media_fooled_Germans_into_happily_accepting_censorship|fooled into embracing censorship]] under the blanket of "personality rights".

"Personality rights" also prevent the preservation of historical events. By today's standards, most photographs ever taken in public violated someone's personality rights, but it never mattered.

<div style="width:100%; overflow-x:scroll;">
{| style="margin:auto;"
|[[File:swinging-london-11.jpg|thumb|This is a photograph from the 1960s ([https://www.vintag.es/2021/08/swinging-london.html source]). By today's standards, these people were all "violated".<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYH87V6EHrk Privacy In France: A Lot Of French People Might Be About To Sue Me - Tom Scott]</ref> ]]
|[[File:nyc-street-scene-1960s.jpg|thumb|Another bunch of "violated" people. ([https://allthatsinteresting.com/1960s-new-york-photos source])]]
|}
</div>

Obviously, you can't leverage "personality rights" against your superiors. The state will still happily surveil you through their CCTV cameras and record all your calls without your consent. The state wants surveillance to be outgoing only.

== "Personality rights" protect bad actors ==
So-called "personality rights" prevent bad actors from being held to account.

For example, some teachers behave badly to their students, for example by shouting and humiliating students, throwing chalk at students, or physically forcing a student out of the class room after harmless drinking of water. People outside the classroom such as parents and the school principal might not believe students that describe how their teachers behaved.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGxrdqGZTbg My Teacher Bullied Me... I REVENGED!] (animated story, 2018)</ref>

So-called "personality rights" prevent other students from picking up their smartphone video cameras and filming the teacher and then publishing the video online with the real name of the teacher. Therefore, teachers don't have to fear consequences while misbehaving towards students. Their abuses stay in the dark. If it wasn't filmed, it's like it didn't happen.

One would say "this is wrong because it would hurt the reputation of the teacher". In fact, German law specifically cites protecting individuals' reputations as a reason for its personality rights.<ref name=201a>[https://archive.today/2025.03.01-001621/https://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/englisch_stgb/englisch_stgb.html#p1943 German Criminal Code (Strafgesetzbuch – StGB) - Section 201a] - "Whoever, without being authorised to do so, makes available to a third party a photograph or other image of another person which is of such a nature as to significantly damage the reputation of the person depicted incurs the same penalty. This also applies, under the same conditions, to a photograph or other image of a deceased person."</ref> However, people who misuse their positions of authority deserve having their reputation damaged. The whole point of a reputation is knowing whether you can trust someone. Therefore, school teachers who think their bad behaviour is justified shouldn't mind having that behaviour on public record. After all, they carry a responsibility while <s>brainwashing</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/school.xhtml The toxic schooling system]</ref> educating children of the next generation and need to be held to a high standard.

In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, misbehaving teachers can be exposed.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x754710}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x754710 My Teacher Bullied Me. I REVENGED!]
</center>

"Personality rights" can also prevent people who behave badly in public (examples:<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIyH71GwYUc&t=07m36s Top 10 People Getting TRIGGERED! 💢] - Top Dingen (2019), at 7:36</ref>) from being exposed online. Personality rights were also leveraged by speedrun cheater [[Billy Mitchell]] and reaction video maker [[Suzy Lu]] to punish critics. Mitchell attacked Benjamin Smith (who ran the YouTube channel "[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5t8u4kpE0WvLxkPWIp8n-g Apollo Legend]") for using video and audio recordings from a public event he attended to expose his corruption, and competing Pac-Man player David W. Race for recording telephone calls he participated in. To David Race's luck, he lives in a US state where recording phone calls without the other participant's consent is legal. Otherwise, it would have been more difficult for him to expose Mitchell's corruption.<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.02.27-171932/https://www.sportskeeda.com/pop-culture/youtuber-apollo-legend-reportedly-found-dead-home-hours-suicide-letter-surfaced-online YouTuber "Apollo Legend" reportedly found dead at home hours after suicide letter surfaced online] - "Apollo Legend was a speedrunning commentator/YouTuber who had quit the platform around a year ago after losing a lawsuit against gamer/restaurateur Billy Mitchell, who sued him over some illegal voice and video recordings that he obtained from an Arcade event that was held in Fort Lauderdale, Florida." - It doesn't matter whether they were "illegal", they expose Billy Mitchell's corruption either way.</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gYcC0zj66GY When Cartoon Network Destroyed Billy Mitchell] - Karl Jobst</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lUdKSLjwZTo Cheater Billy Mitchell Just Keeps Losing] - Karl Jobst</ref> Mitchell also sued Cartoon Network for using his likeness to make fun of his desire to have the highest score in arcade games, albeit unsuccessfully.<ref>[http://www.polygon.com/2015/11/24/9792472/billy-mitchell-regular-show-court-case Arcade champion Billy Mitchell loses case against cartoon portrayal] - Judge declares Mitchell is not a 'giant floating head,' contrary to belief[.] (November 24th, 2015)</ref> Suzy Lu took down videos criticizing her, for having her face appear in them.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/h1NvMBklTn7s/ Suzy Lu: The Most Problematic YouTuber You've Never Heard Of] - John Swan, 2020</ref>

== Personality rights enable paternity fraud ==
The most effective way to thwart paternity fraud is to publicly expose unloyal cheating women in the act using photographs of her with the man she cheated with, which would give her the well deserved reputation of a cheater to make other men think twice before getting together with the cheater.<ref name=TribeOfMen /> However, in some places, personality rights enable paternity fraud by preventing cheating women from being exposed online.

While women are free to slander men as rapists publicly and will be automatically believed<ref>[https://avoiceformen.com/mega-featured/how-the-german-legal-system-failed-horst-arnold/ How the German legal system failed Horst Arnold - A Voice for Men]</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RD320Q1l0TY You Live In A Dangerous Age - So Get Insurance - Coach Red Pill (CRP Classics)] (originally created in 2018) - "You live in a dangerous age. You live in an age where one woman can [leverage] an accusation of sexual impropriety against you - and it can destroy your life."</ref>, men are not allowed to expose women. In places where "personality rights" are weaker or culturally not accepted, cheating women can be exposed.<ref name=TribeOfMen>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RN9ffXvJ6Tk Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating And Reacts Perfectly Instead] - Tribe of Men (2022)</ref><ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGeEZB6YbEw Guy Caught His Girlfriend Cheating. Instead of Flipping Out He Did Something Surprisingly Unexpected] - Interesting Stories (2021)</ref>

== How the media fooled Germans into happily accepting censorship ==
While Americans understand the importance of being able to hold their public government workers accountable using video cameras,<ref>[http://archive.today/2023.11.12-130609/https://pinacnews.com/index.php/about/ A Brief History of PINAC | PINAC News]</ref> Germans got fooled into happily accepting censorship under the blanket of "personality rights" and "rights to ones own image".

So how did it all start?

People in authority grew sick of being held accountable for their public actions by plebians and their video cameras, so in April 2016, the police department of Hagen kickstarted a campaign to smear those who film authority people such as police officers as so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists", through a Facebook post titled "Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof", which traslates into "Shame on you, you gawkers from the train station!"<ref>''[https://www.facebook.com/Polizei.NRW.HA/posts/535167986655510 Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof! - Polizei NRW Hagen | Facebook]''</ref>

In the days following the post, major German news outlets magically picked up on it and publicized it.


* [https://rp-online.de/panorama/schaemt-euch-ihr-gaffer_aid-18168873 Hagen: „Schämt euch, ihr Gaffer“ – RP Online]
* [https://www.n-tv.de/panorama/Hagener-Polizei-schimpft-ueber-Schaulustige-article17467661.html Hagener Polizei schimpft über Schaulustige – N-TV]
* [https://www.tz.de/welt/hagen-hunderte-gaffer-blockieren-rettung-maedchen-10-polizei-stinksauer-zr-6309785.html Hier stören Hunderte Gaffer eine Rettung - Polizei: "Schämt Euch!" – TAZ]
* [https://www.bayern3.de/polizei-aerger-unfall-gaffer-schaulustige-hagen "Schämt Euch, ihr Gaffer vom Hauptbahnhof!" – Bayern3]
* [https://www.augsburger-allgemeine.de/panorama/Hagen-Schaemt-Euch-Polizei-schimpft-bei-Facebook-ueber-Gaffer-id37483702.html "Schämt Euch!": Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer – Augsburger Allgemeine]
* [https://www.noz.de/deutschland-welt/politik/artikel/rettungseinsatz-in-hagen-behindert-polizei-schimpft-bei-facebook-ueber-gaffer-schaemt-euch-23383091 Polizei schimpft bei Facebook über Gaffer: „Schämt Euch!“ – Neue Osnabrücker Zeitung]


The comments on the Facebook post are full of <s>sheeple</s><ref>sheeple: A combination of the words "sheep" and "people" meaning that the person or persons are acting as a group or to only behave based on what is trending (source: [https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sheeple Urban Dictionary])</ref> people agreeing that officers should be protected by so-called "personality rights" while performing a '''public service''', especially from a position of authority. These commenters didn't consider the possibility of officers [[police brutality|misusing their powers]], for example by forcing people to <s>suffocate themselves</s> wear masks or get <s>poisoned</s><ref>[https://digdeeper.club/articles/corona.xhtml#vaccines Coronavirus scare and the blueprint for slavery: COVID vaccines suck]</ref><ref>Even German mainstream media admitted the coronavirus vaccines are poison. Two years late, but better than never. ''[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRbnyY00R_0 Gesundheitliche Schäden und Rechtsstreit: Wie Betroffene nach der Corona-Impfung kämpfen]'' (ZDF, 2023)</ref> vaccinated. In fact, so-called "gawkers" and "sensationalists" are the only reason the public knows that police in some countries forcibly <s>poisoned</s> vaccinated inhabitants.<ref>[https://old.bitchute.com/video/bUYvaDI46eSZ/ Plandemic 3: The Great Awakening - OFFICIAL FULL MOVIE] (at 8:16)</ref>

One can safely assume that all disagreeing comments were [[deleted|quietly swept under the rug]].

It is the same thing that happened four years after that during the plandemic:

<blockquote>
In today's culture of copy-and-paste journalism, it is common for hundreds of unrelated outlets to feature the exact same reports. This is not the result of laziness. This is by design.

When we see identical headlines across seemingly unrelated platforms, the logical mind concludes "well then, it must be true".

The illusion that numerous news sources have arrived at the same conclusion gives us confidence to share the chosen narrative.

And just like that, we become the unwitting pushers of propaganda.
</blockquote>
(From "Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION", at 15:53.)<ref name=plandemic2>[https://www.bitchute.com/video/4u7rt61YeGox/ Plandemic 2 | INDOCTORNATION] by Mikki Willis</ref>

But that wasn't enough yet. In late 2017, the state-owned bank sponsored the production of an emotionally fueled propaganda film titled "Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer" ("sensationalists - don't be a gawker"). Besides the million views on YouTube, the film was broadcast on mainstream television. The film implies that any harmless distant filming of crash sites will escalate to people stepping on the crash site and entering fire trucks to take pictures with the helmets left behind by the firefighters.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRmuaVPiodI Schaulustige - Sei kein Gaffer] (2017 propaganda movie)</ref>

The propaganda movie shifted the culture in a way that makes filming officers in public less culturally accepted '''anywhere''', not only on crash sites. This way, the state ensures that surveillance goes only one way: From the state to the inhabitants. In other words, the state takes great pleasure in surveilling its people, but it doesn't like being surveilled itself.

The propaganda also worked by applying the same labels of "gawkers" and "sensationalists" to people of two distinct groups, both people who photograph and film crash sites from a safe distance and people who physically obstruct rescue personnel to look at the crash site with or without using a camera, even though they do not overlap.

In 2021, the new law specifically punishing the photography and filming of crash sites came into effect, allegedly to protect dead people. The law is worded in a way that implies it only applies to crash sites with dead people. Given that dead people usually exist on a crash site, this effectively outlaws photographing or filming near '''any''' crash sites. As if dead people care in the slightest about appearing on photographs.<ref>''[https://www.bussgeldkatalog.org/gaffer/ Gaffer bei Unfall: Bußgelder & Strafen für Schaulustige 2024 / 2025]''</ref><ref name=201a />

The state has accomplished its wet dream of one-way surveillance.

== Personality rights prevent accountability of the press ==
In a free country, everyone would be able to report on the happenings independently, since the public deserves to know whether police and rescue personnel do their work properly, and also whether the [[old media|established mainstream media]] reports on it accurately.

However, independent reporters and their video cameras threaten the monopoly that the established media has on reporting, therefore the established media attacks independent journalists using labels such as "wannabe journalists" and "wannabe reporters" to defend their monopoly on reporting to ensure that the public sees the world through their lens only.<ref>[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hBXyiv-KCg Rettungskräfte wehren sich: Mit QR Codes gegen Unfall-Gaffer - BILD (2021)]</ref>

When the press reports on major accidents and public riots, personality rights prevent people from independently documenting the event, so the public only receives the point of view of the state-controlled established media.

In Germany, reporters need a state-issued "press pass" ("Presseausweis") in order to be able to report on accident sites, and a broadcasting license ("Rundfunklizenz") in order to be able to live broadcast to more than 500 people anywhere, including on online platforms like YouTube and Twitch. Such licenses are expensive to acquire and will not be granted in the first place to people who report in a way the elites don't like. This way, the state has secured complete control over what can appear on television.

== Reputation management ==
The state cares about the reputation of the country, not about individual crash victims.

To the law-writing bureaucrats in their skyscraper offices, the average person is as little relevant as an ant. A speck in the eye. "The dignity of the crash victims" is nothing but an afterthought, if any thought at all. However, if everyone was able to post videos of crash sites and riots with injured people online, it would hurt the reputation of a country as a "safe country". Therefore, the state had to put an end to it and convince everyone that doing so is bad, bad "sensationalism" and "gawking".

== Personality rights protect harmful corporations. ==
Personality rights prevent manufacturers of unsafe vehicles from being exposed.

Say there was a car manufacturer whose cars frequently caught on fire.<ref>[https://www.brighteon.com/1fbe46fc-bd6f-4663-b136-26917440fa7d Baby Don't Burn My Tesla - musical poetry by Mike Adams] (2025)</ref> Personality rights prevent people from documenting these fires using their video cameras, so knowledge about the unsafety of certain cars stays in darkness.

The propaganda media says that "gawking kills".<ref>[http://archive.today/2025.03.07-230159/http://web.archive.org/web/20210615141113/https://www.gaffen-toetet.de/en/ Start_EN | Gaffen Toetet] (state-sponsored propaganda site)</ref> In reality, lack thereof kills.

== Personality rights destroy history ==
It used to be out of question that public disasters must be preserved on video. For example, the video recording of Ethiopian Airlines flight 961 crashing near the Comoros islands on the 23rd of November, 1996, is an important piece of history. The person who caught it on camera is considered a hero and lucky to have been at the right place at the right time.

<center>
{{#ev:dailymotion|x2p6von}}
[https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2p6von Ethiopian-Airlines-Flight 961 crash 1996]
</center>

But one day, authorities suddenly decided that those who film public disasters are crazy "gawkers" and "sensationalists", and they pushed this idea through the propaganda media they control.

== See also ==
* [[Police brutality]]
* [[DMCA]]

== References ==
<references />

[[Category:Law]]
[[Category:Money]]
[[Category:IRL Shit]]